Alcohol

[spicy_pickles]

I'm going to be brutally honest and admit I was using this to escape from my problems. As soon as the alcohol entered my bloodstream, I felt like my problems were going away. I wasn't drunk or even buzzed, but I could tell a major difference. 

Every night I do this, I feel worse off after the effects wear off. Not physically, but emotionally. I wake up in the middle of the night and my mind is racing. I'm depressed the next morning and all those negative thoughts come racing back. I can't focus on anything but the negative and "what ifs". 

I enjoy my booze here and there, but I'm glad I recognized how I was using it as opposed to simply enjoying it. 

[poimandres]

Do the "what ifs" still exist with out the alcohol?

Very good that you are recognizing your actions.

[Bodhi123]

@spicy_pickles You took a very significant first step in recognizing that the alcohol was being used to escape your problems.

Now the next thing to do is address the problems you were trying to escape. I realize that some of these problems may be serious and do not have an easy fix. But once you address them to the best of your abilities you will attain a happiness that is more permanent and doesn't fade away so easily. Take care.

[RossE]

@spicy_pickles It's good you've admitted that for a start, and gained the awareness over the problem. Do you meditate?

[Passionate]

"Awareness alone is curative"

https://www.actualized.org/articles/awareness-alone-is-curative

[Safari Celeste]

1 hour ago, Passionate said:

"Awareness alone is curative"

https://www.actualized.org/articles/awareness-alone-is-curative

^This is great. This video helped me do some major introspection.

 

I also use alcohol as an escape from my problems. Drinking alleviates nearly all of my social anxiety, but my over-drinking has become a major issue. It's hard to quit drinking all together because for one, you make a habit of it, and two, it's a social activity most everywhere. I work in a bar on a major party street and it's challenging for me to escape the easy drink after work because it's so convenient. Most people in my social circle drink in excess.

I had to become very aware of the times I was drinking which was usually when moping and how to avoid getting myself into a situation where I would lose control. This is not easy; I'm working on it. I'm also very petite, so it's extremely easy for me to get wasted.

I'm one of those people who needs to have their keys and cellphone taken away when drunk. I honestly know I shouldn't drink, but I make exceptions for it all the time socially. I come from a long chain of alcoholics and I'm neurotic. If I were really smart, I'd cut out the drinking lifestyle and work a calm job somewhere far from the downtown partying, but I like the tempting lifestyle even though I'm smart enough to realize it's not good for me.

Do you see this chain of neurotic behavior? Yeah, some bad shit has happened to me because of drinking. I've never gotten a DUI, but I did lose my car once and ruin a relationship.

Edited January 24, 2017 by Safari Celeste

[SFRL]

@Safari Celeste so why don't you go work that calm job?

Yeah I know the excitement.....

But it seems like the biggest step to self improvement you can possibly make in your life. And very achievable. 

Edited January 24, 2017 by STC