Be careful of psychosis if you're involved in the occult

[The Rainmaker]

The occult is real. I'll start off by saying that. Does that mean I believe in ghosts? No. But the occult encompasses a number of practices including tarot magick, herbal magick, rituals, and others which have a number of real-world applications. I am personally very thankful for the time I've spent absorbed in the occult because I am nearly six months sober from alcohol with its aid. I've seen the way it works on a practical level firsthand. However, while I was in the early stages of withdrawing from alcohol (and also withdrawing from marijuana), I took it too far with all the magick and fortune-telling and it led to a bout of psychosis with false memories. This was a vulnerable time for me given the change in equilibrium; in a way, the tarot was necessary in order to distract me, but I completely overdid it and thrusted too much faith into it because of how miraculous my new-found sobriety was. It was equivalent to schizophrenia in the sense that I was fully living in a fantasy reality for two months that was inspired by the bible and gothic horror, but I have no previous history with this condition. Luckily, I snapped out of it after returning to weed and I have been normal ever since; however, the false memories entailed such gruesome themes like hedonism, sex trafficking, gangsters, witches, Jesus, and Judgment Day, so I am lucky that I had the strength to take these delusions in stride and not do something drastic like kill myself or harm somebody else during the time where I believed this nonsense. If I hadn't been keeping my bible close and following ideas of pacifism, stoicism, and forgiveness, then I could have undoubtedly gotten myself into some serious trouble. 

There were various spiritual lessons that I took from these two months spent deluded. In a way, I'm thankful for the fact that I spent two months paranoid enough to think that people were going to possibly kill me, because it gave me the endorphins of someone having a near-death experience. I have a lot of new perspective about what how much I love and appreciate the illusion of life. But that was really dangerous. 

I also still consider the psychosis to have been an occult experience because I think that the occult relates largely to mental illness and the subconscious, but it was not a desirable experience that can be romanticized. It was literally like being possessed by the devil. I thought my town was like Salem. 

[INFP RACOON BABY]

Well if i was you i would definitley still check myself in to talk to a professional about that if im being totally honest.

[Adodd]

See a professional. Make sure it won't reoccur and know how to handle it if it does.

[The Rainmaker]

I obviously have done that already @INFP RACOON BABY @Adodd

Edited February 23, 2022 by The Rainmaker

[Arcangelo]

9 hours ago, The Rainmaker said:

I am nearly six months sober from alcohol with its aid.

10

years

2

months.

[Preety_India]

If you have a very dogmatic belief in life, then literally anything can turn into a psychosis. 

 

[Alex_R]

Can you Making it Rain

[LSD-Rumi]

@The Rainmaker How is the occult is "real" and " have real-world applications"? Can you explain your experience with the occult?

[The Rainmaker]

@Benton @LSD-Rumi The occult is the manipulation of reality and the revitalization of the subconscious. It is very hard to put the occult into words, especially the further I delve, but there is a "lifting of the veil" of sorts that allows the occultist to awaken to a metaphorical "underworld" in those around us. Through the usage of ritual magick such as tarot cards, one can achieve a more "bare bones" view of the human experience and the people around oneself. The occult opens the doors to a deeper and more profound understanding of the mental illnesses and sexual desires that drive us and those around us. 

The best way of summarizing it would be that the occult (in practical usage; not if you're going ghost-hunting or something) will allow you to see the primal Freudian "id" that drives everyone, the id that the ego tries so desperately to keep from the surface. In the context of past memories, this type of thing is why the occult can potentially trigger a traumatic reaction-- you might realize more sinister and sexual undertones that existed in a situation from the past you thought was much more innocent if that makes sense. 

If I think of better ways to explain it, I'll keep posting in this chat.

[The Rainmaker]

@Benton My psychosis led me to believe dead relatives of mine were still alive, that all of my loved ones were gangster witches in the Illuminati who were in a heated extortion battle through the use of the tarot, and that a famous singer had secretly grown up in my town and was extorting the town for millions so that I would become her ghostwriter and sex slave.