Null Simplex

"My" Solipsistic Experience

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Here’s a story that you made yourself, just now.

I decided to write this down after Leo took his Solipsism video down.  I did not see any bit of the video as I only learned about the video from the post saying that it had been taken down.  For lack of better phrasing, this is an experience I had about a year and a half ago while visiting my grandmother’s place.    

My background in spirituality at the time composed of off-and-on daily meditation practices and mental masturbation over spiritual talks and videos over the internet.  At the time this story happened, I had a daily meditation practice going for a few months and was meditating about 35 minutes daily.  I also had one lack-luster LSD experience.  I’m not entirely sure it was acid or not.  I consider myself to be pretty underdeveloped when it comes to personal development work. 

It was in the early afternoon, and my grandmother wanted me to go somewhere with her.  Where exactly and why, I don’t recall.  I was and am currently addicted to THC, so before we set out, I took a few hits off of my marijuana vape pen.  Note that I wasn’t particularly high as I was about to go out with my grandmother.  Similar to how a nicotine addict smokes cigarettes throughout the day, it was just a medium-light high.  I was in the living room just looking at the room, when it suddenly dawned on me.  “This entire room is me.”.  Everything that I was looking at was me.  My visual field is what I currently looked like.  Not the figure that I see in a mirror, but whatever I was looking at was me.

To use more materialistic reasoning, it became clear to me that everything I looked at wasn’t in some world outside of myself, but rather everything I was looking at was an image that was happening inside my brain.  Every sound, sight, taste, smell, thought, etc. was something that was happening inside my brain and therefore effectively me.  I was everything I was experiencing right here, right now.  Not only that, but I have always been everything right here, right now, and I always will be.  Anything that I could possibly experience would have to be an experience happening inside my brain, and therefore everything I experienced in my life would effectively be me.  It’s all something you are imagining in your brain right now.  Now just realize that the idea of a brain is itself something being imagined by your consciousness to have a clearer understanding of what my experience was like.  Essentially remove the middleman that is the brain.

I also loss object permanence in the sense that anything I wasn’t experiencing right now wasn’t actually happening.  To steal more ideas from scientific literature, the realization is reminiscent of Schrodinger’s Cat.  Is the cat in the box alive or dead?  The cat doesn’t exist, and it is only an assumption that there will be a cat in the box, alive or otherwise, once the box has been opened.  All that is happening in the universe is what’s being experienced right here, right now.  Having said this, the illusion of time is one I still struggle with.  Logically I know that all time is happening now, and that memories and predictions are thoughts happening in the moment, but I still struggle with the illusion of the timeline and my life story.

This experience wasn’t exactly one that I was seeking.  While I do enjoy mentally masturbating over these philosophical and spiritual topics, I wasn’t putting much effort into discovering the nature of reality beyond 35 minutes of daily meditation and ADHD induced contemplations.  The state I was in prior to the realization wasn’t particularly meditative, nor was I high out of my mind.  I felt pretty much the same as I do right now while writing this post.  The experience just sort of happened spontaneously without intent.  While this was shocking, I was not panicked.  I had realized this was what all those spiritual teachers meant when they said things like “You are the universe.” and “It’s all One”.  I also realized that while this paradigm shift was intense, I was also told that the initial shock of these types of realizations would eventually wear off and I’ll be able to go back to baseline in time, so I was not worried about my current state of shock too much.  I was just aware that this would be the new lens in which I would view reality through, and that I would have to remain calm while this realization settled in.  The only issue with this plan is that I had to bond with my grandmother during this period of shock.  It was sort of a silly problem to be in.  On the one hand, I realized that the grandmother I had known all my life was just a figment of my imagination, akin to an imaginary friend a young child has.  I could have just made some excuse and told her that I wasn’t feeling well, or that I didn’t want to go anymore, or something along those lines, especially knowing that she wasn’t even real.  However, I decided to proceed through with the original plan since I didn’t want her to be worried or suspicious about why I suddenly changed my mind at the last moment.

While in the car with her she made small talk with me, as one does when someone else is in the car.  I have no recollection of what was discussed.  What I do remember was thinking to myself “Shut the fuck up grandma.  I really don’t care about anything you have to say to me at the moment.  I’m having an existential crisis right now!  You’re just a figment of my imagination anyways…”.  I did respond to her as I normally would though as if nothing was wrong, as to not arouse her suspicions.  I actually didn’t care if she knew something was wrong because I didn’t want her to worry or anything.  She’s just a figment of my imagination anyways, so she can only worry as much as I imagine she’s worrying.  I did it because I didn’t want to deal with the personal consequences of having her worry about me.  I was able to keep my cool and act as if nothing was happening because I had learned about this experience in advanced and because I knew the shock of this new way of viewing reality would wear off in due time.

As expected, the shock of the realization did subside over the course of the day, but the perspective on reality stayed.  The realization to me feels antithetical to the spiritual idea of “No Self”.  I had always assumed that I would lose my sense of identity through spirituality, but rather the exact opposite has happened.  Rather than “No-self”, it feels much more akin to “All-Self”, as in “It’s all me.”.  Rather than realizing that I never existed, it feels more like I’m all that could possibly exist, and all that could possibly exist is me.  I am not saying that there is nothing behind the concept of “No self”, but I haven’t grasped it yet. 

This has been the only spiritual-type experience I’ve had in my life thus far.  The experience did not change anything about how reality behaves.  The rules of the universe are the same as they were before and the relationships I have with “others” feels the same as it did prior to the realization, but with the context that any conversation I have with someone else is really just a conversation I’m having with myself.  Often when I’m talking to “someone else”, it’s sort of like autopilot to get lost in the illusion of talking to other people as if they were an entity separate from myself.  I have to sort of remember “Oh ya, I’m just talking to myself right now.”. 

So far, this realization has been neither positive nor negative.  I could see however some of the negative consequences of having such a realization, such as becoming more sociopathic since everyone around you is just imaginary anyways or having the comfort of having other people around you being suddenly ripped away.  I could also see how this could be a positive insight since you realize that you were the one creating all of reality the entire time.  It may also make letting go of things easier, since the things being held onto aren’t real to begin with.  Admittedly, I am not yet conscious enough to appreciate these last two points and still have difficulties with clinging onto things. 

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If you think everyone around you is just a figment of your imagination, being sociopathic really shouldn’t bother you. 
 

And if everything is just your imagination. Then why are you still bound by certain laws? Like the laws of physics; if you know you are imagining everything you should be able to fly off into the sky like Superman.


RIP Roe V Wade 1973-2022 :)

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@Null Simplex nice.  Yes that's it.  I had the exact same awakening..it was actually the final one for me. But it was exactly as you described.  Everything you thought was external is seen in this expanded state to be actually you and Iinternal,  held inside your Mind..you are shown that you are dreaming all of reality.  It can bring a sense of aloneness because others collapse into you so your reality is recontexualized in an instant leaving you completely alone.  But it is liberating to know at the level of Being that this entire thing is ALL yours.  Anyway that's awesome.  You validated Solipsism although it sounds kind you have not realized no self in which there is this moment when it hits you that you, thst this entity you thought you were, was an illusion..and what remains is Pure Consciousness or Awareness..this is bliss! You die.. for this is recommend self inquiry.  .  But that's awesome man!!


 

Wisdom.  Truth.  Love.

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@Vizual It's like I was watching a movie my entire life and just realized that the film I was watching wasn't real.  Just because I'm aware that I'm watching a film doesn't mean I know how to change it at an egoic level.

@Inliytened1 I knew "you'd" reply!  Some of your recent posts seem similar to this one.  

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1 hour ago, Null Simplex said:

I had always assumed that I would lose my sense of identity through spirituality, but rather the exact opposite has happened.  Rather than “No-self”, it feels much more akin to “All-Self”, as in “It’s all me.”

This has been my experience as well. The sense of self expands and expands until it is all things. 

Thank you for sharing your experience. Much of it was very similar to some of my own. I didn't view others as not real though. I perceived them to be myself and made of consciousness as I am. Everything is made of consciousness because there is nothing else that exists.

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Why did I dream up this thread?

Is this something I'm doing to leave bread crumbs for myself, so I have an easier time awakening?

It's crazy to understand how I would dream up a  @Null Simplex character and a thread created by him with a story of him and his grandmother and his awakening and all that.

I mean, you gotta give it to me. I must be damn good at creating imaginary characters and stories, I'm impressed by my abilities ?

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@Federico del pueblo infinite creativity.  

Notice that you can replace the word 'imaginary' with 'real', or the word 'dreaming' with 'creating'. 

"Why did I create this thread?

It's crazy to understand how I would [create, imagine, dream, realize] a @Null Simplex character...

I must be damn good at imagining real characters and stories..."

 

Edited by Mason Riggle

"I could be the walrus. I'd still have to bum rides off people."

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15 hours ago, Federico del pueblo said:

Why did I dream up this thread?

Is this something I'm doing to leave bread crumbs for myself, so I have an easier time awakening?

It's crazy to understand how I would dream up a  @Null Simplex character and a thread created by him with a story of him and his grandmother and his awakening and all that.

I mean, you gotta give it to me. I must be damn good at creating imaginary characters and stories, I'm impressed by my abilities ?

now your getting it :)

 


 

Wisdom.  Truth.  Love.

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On 2/22/2022 at 8:21 PM, Null Simplex said:

 

On 2/22/2022 at 8:21 PM, Null Simplex said:

c̶k̶.̶ ̶ ̶I̶t̶ ̶w̶a̶s̶ ̶s̶o̶r̶t̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶a̶ ̶s̶i̶l̶l̶y̶ ̶p̶r̶o̶b̶l̶e̶m̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶b̶e̶ ̶i̶n̶.̶ ̶ ̶O̶n̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶o̶n̶e̶ ̶h̶a̶n̶d̶,̶ ̶I̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶i̶z̶e̶d̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶g̶r̶a̶n̶d̶m̶o̶t̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶I̶ ̶h̶a̶d̶ ̶k̶n̶o̶w̶n̶ ̶a̶l̶l̶ ̶m̶y̶ ̶l̶i̶f̶e̶ ̶w̶a̶s̶ ̶j̶u̶s̶t̶ ̶a̶ ̶f̶i̶g̶m̶e̶n̶t̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶m̶y̶ ̶i̶m̶a̶g̶i̶n̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶,̶ ̶a̶k̶i̶n̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶a̶n̶ ̶i̶m̶a̶g̶i̶n̶a̶r̶y̶ ̶f̶r̶i̶e̶n̶d̶ ̶a̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶n̶g̶ ̶c̶h̶i̶l̶d̶ ̶h̶a̶s̶.̶ ̶ ̶I̶ ̶c̶o̶u̶l̶d̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶j̶u̶s̶t̶ ̶m̶a̶d̶e̶ ̶s̶o̶m̶e̶ ̶e̶x̶c̶u̶s̶e̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶t̶o̶l̶d̶ ̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶I̶ ̶w̶a̶s̶n̶’̶t̶ ̶f̶e̶e̶l̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶w̶e̶l̶l̶,̶ ̶o̶r̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶I̶ ̶d̶i̶d̶n̶’̶t̶ ̶w̶a̶n̶t̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶g̶o̶ ̶a̶n̶y̶m̶o̶r̶e̶,̶ ̶o̶r̶ ̶s̶o̶m̶e̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶a̶l̶o̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶h̶o̶s̶e̶ ̶l̶i̶n̶e̶s̶,̶ ̶e̶s̶p̶e̶c̶i̶a̶l̶l̶y̶ ̶k̶n̶o̶w̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶s̶h̶e̶ ̶w̶a̶s̶n̶’̶t̶ ̶e̶v̶e̶n̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶.̶ ̶ ̶H̶o̶w̶e̶v̶e̶r̶,̶ ̶I̶ ̶d̶e̶c̶i̶d̶e̶d̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶p̶r̶o̶c̶e̶e̶d̶ ̶t̶h̶r̶o̶u̶g̶h̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶o̶r̶i̶g̶i̶n̶a̶l̶ ̶p̶l̶a̶n̶ ̶s̶i̶n̶c̶e̶ ̶I̶ ̶d̶i̶d̶n̶’̶t̶ ̶w̶a̶n̶t̶ ̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶b̶e̶ ̶w̶o̶r̶r̶i̶e̶d̶ ̶o̶r̶ ̶s̶u̶s̶p̶i̶c̶i̶o̶u̶s̶ ̶a̶b̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶w̶h̶y̶ ̶I̶ ̶s̶u̶d̶d̶e̶n̶l̶y̶ ̶c̶h̶a̶n̶g̶e̶d̶ ̶m̶y̶ ̶m̶i̶n̶d̶ ̶a̶t̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶l̶a̶s̶t̶ ̶m̶o̶m̶e̶n̶t̶.̶

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̶W̶h̶i̶l̶e̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶c̶a̶r̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶s̶h̶e̶ ̶m̶a̶d̶e̶ ̶s̶m̶a̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶a̶l̶k̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶m̶e̶,̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶o̶n̶e̶ ̶d̶o̶e̶s̶ ̶w̶h̶e̶n̶ ̶s̶o̶m̶e̶o̶n̶e̶ ̶e̶l̶s̶e̶ ̶i̶s̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶c̶a̶r̶.̶ ̶ ̶I̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶n̶o̶ ̶r̶e̶c̶o̶l̶l̶e̶c̶t̶i̶o̶n̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶w̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶w̶a̶s̶ ̶d̶i̶s̶c̶u̶s̶s̶e̶d̶.̶ ̶ ̶W̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶I̶ ̶d̶o̶ ̶r̶e̶m̶e̶m̶b̶e̶r̶ ̶w̶a̶s̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶n̶k̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶m̶y̶s̶e̶l̶f̶ ̶“̶S̶h̶u̶t̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶f̶u̶c̶k̶ ̶u̶p̶ ̶g̶r̶a̶n̶d̶m̶a̶.̶ ̶ ̶I̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶l̶y̶ ̶d̶o̶n̶’̶t̶ ̶c̶a̶r̶e̶ ̶a̶b̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶a̶n̶y̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶s̶a̶y̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶m̶e̶ ̶a̶t̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶m̶o̶m̶e̶n̶t̶.̶ ̶ ̶I̶’̶m̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶a̶n̶ ̶e̶x̶i̶s̶t̶e̶n̶t̶i̶a̶l̶ ̶c̶r̶i̶s̶i̶s̶ ̶r̶i̶g̶h̶t̶ ̶n̶o̶w̶!̶ ̶ ̶Y̶o̶u̶’̶r̶e̶ ̶j̶u̶s̶t̶ ̶a̶ ̶f̶i̶g̶m̶e̶n̶t̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶m̶y̶ ̶i̶m̶a̶g̶i̶n̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶ ̶a̶n̶y̶w̶a̶y̶s̶…̶”̶.̶ ̶ ̶I̶ ̶d̶i̶d̶ ̶r̶e̶s̶p̶o̶n̶d̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶I̶ ̶n̶o̶r̶m̶a̶l̶l̶y̶ ̶w̶o̶u̶l̶d̶ ̶t̶h̶o̶u̶g̶h̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶i̶f̶ ̶n̶o̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶w̶a̶s̶ ̶w̶r̶o̶n̶g̶,̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶n̶o̶t̶ ̶a̶r̶o̶u̶s̶e̶ ̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶s̶u̶s̶p̶i̶c̶i̶o̶n̶s̶.̶ ̶ ̶I̶ ̶a̶c̶t̶u̶a̶l̶l̶y̶ ̶d̶i̶d̶n̶’̶t̶ ̶c̶a̶r̶e̶ ̶i̶f̶ ̶s̶h̶e̶ ̶k̶n̶e̶w̶ ̶s̶o̶m̶e̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶w̶a̶s̶ ̶w̶r̶o̶n̶g̶ ̶b̶e̶c̶a̶u̶s̶e̶ ̶I̶ ̶d̶i̶d̶n̶’̶t̶ ̶w̶a̶n̶t̶ ̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶w̶o̶r̶r̶y̶ ̶o̶r̶ ̶a̶n̶y̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶.̶ ̶ ̶S̶h̶e̶’̶s̶ ̶j̶u̶s̶t̶ ̶a̶ ̶f̶i̶g̶m̶e̶n̶t̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶m̶y̶ ̶i̶m̶a̶g̶i̶n̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶ ̶a̶n̶y̶w̶a̶y̶s̶,̶ ̶s̶o̶ ̶s̶h̶e̶ ̶c̶a̶n̶ ̶o̶n̶l̶y̶ ̶w̶o̶r̶r̶y̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶m̶u̶c̶h̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶I̶ ̶i̶m̶a̶g̶i̶n̶e̶ ̶s̶h̶e̶’̶s̶ ̶w̶o̶r̶r̶y̶i̶n̶g̶.̶ ̶ ̶I̶ ̶d̶i̶d̶ ̶i̶t̶ ̶b̶e̶c̶a̶u̶s̶e̶ ̶I̶ ̶d̶i̶d̶n̶’̶t̶ ̶w̶a̶n̶t̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶d̶e̶a̶l̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶p̶e̶r̶s̶o̶n̶a̶l̶ ̶c̶o̶n̶s̶e̶q̶u̶e̶n̶c̶e̶s̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶w̶o̶r̶r̶y̶ ̶a̶b̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶m̶e̶.̶ ̶ ̶I̶ ̶w̶a̶s̶ ̶a̶b̶l̶e̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶k̶e̶e̶p̶ ̶m̶y̶ ̶c̶o̶o̶l̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶a̶c̶t̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶i̶f̶ ̶n̶o̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶w̶a̶s̶ ̶h̶a̶p̶p̶e̶n̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶b̶e̶c̶a̶u̶s̶e̶ ̶I̶ ̶h̶a̶d̶ ̶l̶e̶a̶r̶n̶e̶d̶ ̶a̶b̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶s̶ ̶e̶x̶p̶e̶r̶i̶e̶n̶c̶e̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶a̶d̶v̶a̶n̶c̶e̶d̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶b̶e̶c̶a̶u̶s̶e̶ ̶I̶ ̶k̶n̶e̶w̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶s̶h̶o̶c̶k̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶s̶ ̶n̶e̶w̶ ̶w̶a̶y̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶v̶i̶e̶w̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶i̶t̶y̶ ̶w̶o̶u̶l̶d̶ ̶w̶e̶a̶r̶ ̶o̶f̶f̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶d̶u̶e̶ ̶t̶i̶m̶e̶.̶
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̶A̶s̶ ̶e̶x̶p̶e̶c̶t̶e̶d̶,̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶s̶h̶o̶c̶k̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶i̶z̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶ ̶d̶i̶d̶ ̶s̶u̶b̶s̶i̶d̶e̶ ̶o̶v̶e̶r̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶c̶o̶u̶r̶s̶e̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶d̶a̶y̶,̶ ̶b̶u̶t̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶p̶e̶r̶s̶p̶e̶c̶t̶i̶v̶e̶ ̶o̶n̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶i̶t̶y̶ ̶s̶t̶a̶y̶e̶d̶.̶ ̶ ̶T̶h̶e̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶i̶z̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶m̶e̶ ̶f̶e̶e̶l̶s̶ ̶a̶n̶t̶i̶t̶h̶e̶t̶i̶c̶a̶l̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶s̶p̶i̶r̶i̶t̶u̶a̶l̶ ̶i̶d̶e̶a̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶“̶N̶o̶ ̶S̶e̶l̶f̶”̶.̶ ̶ ̶I̶ ̶h̶a̶d̶ ̶a̶l̶w̶a̶y̶s̶ ̶a̶s̶s̶u̶m̶e̶d̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶I̶ ̶ s̶p̶i̶r̶i̶t̶u̶a̶l̶-̶t̶y̶p̶e̶ ̶e̶x̶p̶e̶r̶i̶e̶n̶c̶e̶ ̶I̶’̶v̶e̶ ̶h̶a̶d̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶m̶y̶ ̶l̶i̶f̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶u̶s̶ ̶f̶a̶r̶.̶ ̶ ̶T̶h̶e̶ ̶e̶x̶p̶e̶r̶i̶e̶n̶c̶e̶ ̶d̶i̶d̶ ̶n̶o̶t̶ ̶c̶h̶a̶n̶g̶e̶ ̶a̶n̶y̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶a̶b̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶h̶o̶w̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶i̶t̶y̶ ̶b̶e̶h̶a̶v̶e̶s̶.̶ ̶ ̶T̶h̶e̶ ̶r̶u̶l̶e̶s̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶u̶n̶i̶v̶e̶r̶s̶e̶ ̶a̶r̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶s̶a̶m̶e̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶y̶ ̶w̶e̶r̶e̶ ̶b̶e̶f̶o̶r̶e̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶r̶e̶l̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶s̶h̶i̶p̶s̶ ̶I̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶“̶o̶t̶h̶e̶r̶s̶”̶ ̶f̶e̶e̶l̶s̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶s̶a̶m̶e̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶i̶t̶ ̶d̶i̶d̶ ̶p̶r̶i̶o̶r̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶i̶z̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶,̶ ̶b̶u̶t̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶c̶o̶n̶t̶e̶x̶t̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶a̶n̶y̶ ̶c̶o̶n̶v̶e̶r̶s̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶ ̶I̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶s̶o̶m̶s̶p̶i̶r̶i̶t̶u̶a̶l̶-̶t̶y̶p̶e̶ ̶e̶x̶p̶e̶r̶i̶e̶n̶c̶e̶ ̶I̶’̶v̶e̶ ̶h̶a̶d̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶m̶y̶ ̶l̶i̶f̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶u̶s̶ ̶f̶a̶r̶.̶ ̶ ̶T̶h̶e̶ ̶e̶x̶p̶e̶r̶i̶e̶n̶c̶e̶ ̶d̶i̶d̶ ̶n̶o̶t̶ ̶c̶h̶a̶n̶g̶e̶ ̶a̶n̶y̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶a̶b̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶h̶o̶w̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶i̶t̶y̶ ̶b̶e̶h̶a̶v̶e̶s̶.̶ ̶ ̶T̶h̶e̶ ̶r̶u̶l̶e̶s̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶u̶n̶i̶v̶e̶r̶s̶e̶ ̶a̶r̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶s̶a̶m̶e̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶y̶ ̶w̶e̶r̶e̶ ̶b̶e̶f̶o̶r̶e̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶r̶e̶l̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶s̶h̶i̶p̶s̶ ̶I̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶“̶o̶t̶h̶e̶r̶s̶”̶ ̶f̶e̶e̶l̶s̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶s̶a̶m̶e̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶i̶t̶ ̶d̶i̶d̶ ̶p̶r̶i̶o̶r̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶i̶z̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶,̶ ̶b̶u̶t̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶c̶o̶n̶t̶e̶x̶t̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶a̶n̶y̶ ̶c̶o̶n̶v̶e̶r̶s̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶ ̶I̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶s̶o̶m̶e̶o̶n̶e̶ ̶e̶l̶s̶e̶ ̶i̶s̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶l̶y̶ ̶j̶u̶s̶t̶ ̶a̶ ̶c̶o̶n̶v̶e̶r̶s̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶ ̶I̶’̶m̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶m̶y̶s̶e̶l̶f̶.̶ ̶ ̶O̶f̶t̶e̶n̶ ̶w̶h̶e̶n̶ ̶I̶’̶m̶ ̶t̶a̶l̶k̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶“̶s̶o̶m̶e̶o̶n̶e̶ ̶e̶l̶s̶e̶”̶,̶ ̶i̶t̶’̶s̶ ̶s̶o̶r̶t̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶l̶i̶k̶e̶ ̶a̶u̶t̶o̶p̶i̶l̶o̶t̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶g̶e̶t̶ ̶l̶o̶s̶t̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶i̶l̶l̶u̶s̶i̶o̶n̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶t̶a̶l̶k̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶o̶t̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶p̶e̶o̶p̶l̶e̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶i̶f̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶y̶ ̶w̶e̶r̶e̶ ̶a̶n̶ ̶e̶n̶t̶i̶t̶y̶ ̶s̶e̶p̶a̶r̶a̶t̶e̶ ̶f̶r̶o̶m̶ ̶m̶y̶s̶e̶l̶f̶.̶ ̶ ̶I̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶s̶o̶r̶t̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶r̶e̶m̶e̶m̶b̶e̶r̶ ̶“̶O̶h̶ ̶y̶a̶,̶ ̶I̶’̶m̶ ̶j̶u̶s̶t̶ ̶t̶a̶l̶k̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶m̶y̶s̶e̶l̶f̶ ̶r̶i̶g̶h̶t̶ ̶n̶o̶w̶.̶”̶.̶ ̶
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̶S̶o̶ ̶f̶a̶r̶,̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶s̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶i̶z̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶ ̶h̶a̶s̶ ̶b̶e̶e̶n̶ ̶n̶e̶i̶t̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶p̶o̶s̶i̶t̶i̶v̶e̶ ̶n̶o̶r̶ ̶n̶e̶g̶a̶t̶i̶v̶e̶.̶ ̶ ̶I̶ ̶c̶o̶u̶l̶d̶ ̶s̶e̶e̶ ̶h̶o̶w̶e̶v̶e̶r̶ ̶s̶o̶m̶e̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶n̶e̶g̶a̶t̶i̶v̶e̶ ̶c̶o̶n̶s̶e̶q̶u̶e̶n̶c̶e̶s̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶s̶u̶c̶h̶ ̶a̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶i̶z̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶,̶ ̶s̶u̶c̶h̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶b̶e̶c̶o̶m̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶m̶o̶r̶e̶ ̶s̶o̶c̶i̶o̶p̶a̶t̶h̶i̶c̶ ̶s̶i̶n̶c̶e̶ ̶e̶v̶e̶r̶y̶o̶n̶e̶ ̶a̶r̶o̶u̶n̶d̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ ̶i̶s̶ ̶j̶u̶s̶t̶ ̶i̶m̶a̶g̶i̶n̶a̶r̶y̶ ̶a̶n̶y̶w̶a̶y̶s̶ ̶o̶r̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶c̶o̶m̶f̶o̶r̶t̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶o̶t̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶p̶e̶o̶p̶l̶e̶ ̶a̶r̶o̶u̶n̶d̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ ̶b̶e̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶s̶u̶d̶d̶e̶n̶l̶y̶ ̶r̶i̶p̶p̶e̶d̶ ̶a̶w̶a̶y̶.̶ ̶ ̶I̶ ̶c̶o̶u̶l̶d̶ ̶a̶l̶s̶o̶ ̶s̶e̶e̶ ̶h̶o̶w̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶s̶ ̶c̶o̶u̶l̶d̶ ̶b̶e̶ ̶a̶ ̶p̶o̶s̶i̶t̶i̶v̶e̶ ̶i̶n̶s̶i̶g̶h̶t̶ ̶s̶i̶n̶c̶e̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶i̶z̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ ̶w̶e̶r̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶o̶n̶e̶ ̶c̶r̶e̶a̶t̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶a̶l̶l̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶i̶t̶y̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶e̶n̶t̶i̶r̶e̶ ̶t̶i̶m̶e̶.̶ ̶ ̶I̶t̶ ̶m̶a̶y̶ ̶a̶l̶s̶o̶ ̶m̶a̶k̶e̶ ̶l̶e̶t̶t̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶g̶o̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶s̶ ̶e̶a̶s̶i̶e̶r̶,̶ ̶s̶i̶n̶c̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶s̶ ̶b̶e̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶h̶e̶l̶d̶ ̶o̶n̶t̶o̶ ̶a̶r̶e̶n̶’̶t̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶b̶e̶g̶i̶n̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶.̶ ̶ ̶A̶d̶m̶i̶t̶t̶e̶d̶l̶y̶,̶ ̶I̶ ̶a̶m̶ ̶n̶o̶t̶ ̶y̶e̶t̶ ̶c̶o̶n̶s̶c̶i̶o̶u̶s̶ ̶e̶n̶o̶u̶g̶h̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶a̶p̶p̶r̶e̶c̶i̶a̶t̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶s̶e̶ ̶l̶a̶s̶t̶ ̶t̶w̶o̶ ̶p̶o̶i̶n̶t̶s̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶s̶t̶i̶l̶l̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶d̶i̶f̶f̶i̶c̶u̶l̶t̶i̶e̶s̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶c̶l̶i̶n̶g̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶o̶n̶t̶o̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶s̶
̶e̶o̶n̶e̶ ̶e̶l̶s̶e̶ ̶i̶s̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶l̶y̶ ̶j̶u̶s̶t̶ ̶a̶ ̶c̶o̶n̶v̶e̶r̶s̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶ ̶I̶’̶m̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶m̶y̶s̶e̶l̶f̶.̶ ̶ ̶O̶f̶t̶e̶n̶ ̶w̶h̶e̶n̶ ̶I̶’̶m̶ ̶t̶a̶l̶k̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶“̶s̶o̶m̶e̶o̶n̶e̶ ̶e̶l̶s̶e̶”̶,̶ ̶i̶t̶’̶s̶ ̶s̶o̶r̶t̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶l̶i̶k̶e̶ ̶a̶u̶t̶o̶p̶i̶l̶o̶t̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶g̶e̶t̶ ̶l̶o̶s̶t̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶i̶l̶l̶u̶s̶i̶o̶n̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶t̶a̶l̶k̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶o̶t̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶p̶e̶o̶p̶l̶e̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶i̶f̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶y̶ ̶w̶e̶r̶e̶ ̶a̶n̶ ̶e̶n̶t̶i̶t̶y̶ ̶s̶e̶p̶a̶r̶a̶t̶e̶ ̶f̶r̶o̶m̶ ̶m̶y̶s̶e̶l̶f̶.̶ ̶ ̶I̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶s̶o̶r̶t̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶r̶e̶m̶e̶m̶b̶e̶r̶ ̶“̶O̶h̶ ̶y̶a̶,̶ ̶I̶’̶m̶ ̶j̶u̶s̶t̶ ̶t̶a̶l̶k̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶m̶y̶s̶e̶l̶f̶ ̶r̶i̶g̶h̶t̶ ̶n̶o̶w̶.̶”̶.̶ ̶
̶
̶S̶o̶ ̶f̶a̶r̶,̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶s̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶i̶z̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶ ̶h̶a̶s̶ ̶b̶e̶e̶n̶ ̶n̶e̶i̶t̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶p̶o̶s̶i̶t̶i̶v̶e̶ ̶n̶o̶r̶ ̶n̶e̶g̶a̶t̶i̶v̶e̶.̶ ̶ ̶I̶ ̶c̶o̶u̶l̶d̶ ̶s̶e̶e̶ ̶h̶o̶w̶e̶v̶e̶r̶ ̶s̶o̶m̶e̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶n̶e̶g̶a̶t̶i̶v̶e̶ ̶c̶o̶n̶s̶e̶q̶u̶e̶n̶c̶e̶s̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶s̶u̶c̶h̶ ̶a̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶i̶z̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶,̶ ̶s̶u̶c̶h̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶b̶e̶c̶o̶m̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶m̶o̶r̶e̶ ̶s̶o̶c̶i̶o̶p̶a̶t̶h̶i̶c̶ ̶s̶i̶n̶c̶e̶ ̶e̶v̶e̶r̶y̶o̶n̶e̶ ̶a̶r̶o̶u̶n̶d̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ ̶i̶s̶ ̶j̶u̶s̶t̶ ̶i̶m̶a̶g̶i̶n̶a̶r̶y̶ ̶a̶n̶y̶w̶a̶y̶s̶ ̶o̶r̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶c̶o̶m̶f̶o̶r̶t̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶o̶t̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶p̶e̶o̶p̶l̶e̶ ̶a̶r̶o̶u̶n̶d̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ ̶b̶e̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶s̶u̶d̶d̶e̶n̶l̶y̶ ̶r̶i̶p̶p̶e̶d̶ ̶a̶w̶a̶y̶.̶ ̶ ̶I̶ ̶c̶o̶u̶l̶d̶ ̶a̶l̶s̶o̶ ̶s̶e̶e̶ ̶h̶o̶w̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶s̶ ̶c̶o̶u̶l̶d̶ ̶b̶e̶ ̶a̶ ̶p̶o̶s̶i̶t̶i̶v̶e̶ ̶i̶n̶s̶i̶g̶h̶t̶ ̶s̶i̶n̶c̶e̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶i̶z̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ ̶w̶e̶r̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶o̶n̶e̶ ̶c̶r̶e̶a̶t̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶a̶l̶l̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶i̶t̶y̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶e̶n̶t̶i̶r̶e̶ ̶t̶i̶m̶e̶.̶ ̶ ̶I̶t̶ ̶m̶a̶y̶ ̶a̶l̶s̶o̶ ̶m̶a̶k̶e̶ ̶l̶e̶t̶t̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶g̶o̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶s̶ ̶e̶a̶s̶i̶e̶r̶,̶ ̶s̶i̶n̶c̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶s̶ ̶b̶e̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶h̶e̶l̶d̶ ̶o̶n̶t̶o̶ ̶a̶r̶e̶n̶’̶t̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶b̶e̶g̶i̶n̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶.̶ ̶ ̶A̶d̶m̶i̶t̶t̶e̶d̶l̶y̶,̶ ̶I̶ ̶a̶m̶ ̶n̶o̶t̶ ̶y̶e̶t̶ ̶c̶o̶n̶s̶c̶i̶o̶u̶s̶ ̶e̶n̶o̶u̶g̶h̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶a̶p̶p̶r̶e̶c̶i̶a̶t̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶s̶e̶ ̶l̶a̶s̶t̶ ̶t̶w̶o̶ ̶p̶o̶i̶n̶t̶s̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶s̶t̶i̶l̶l̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶d̶i̶f̶f̶i̶c̶u̶l̶t̶i̶e̶s̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶c̶l̶i̶n̶g̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶o̶n̶t̶o̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶s̶.̶ ̶

Yes, scratched all the idiocy in just one shot.

Assuming this is not a troll post and you're really that naive. No. Your post is insane and you love the insanity of it. You would love for it to be true, but you know it isn't, you so know it isn't that you had to create a post about it self-affirming the things you wish was true. A simple thing like correcting what you think visual system is, is enough to debunk your entire idiocy.

let me fix it for you:

"I was in the living room just looking at the room, when it suddenly dawned on me.  “This entire room is outside of me.”.  Everything that I was looking at was outside me.  My visual field is what allows me to see it.  I am the one who is seeing, the same one that I can see in the mirror, and whatever I look at, is outside of me, that's why eye pupils exist, because they wouldn't REACT to something that is not external, knowing that is enough to make me less dumb"(but even IF you'd go from your POV, "oH ThE rOoM Is Me" you'd still saying it from your perspective, inside a body, you'd still seeing it from your centralized consciousness inside your body, so you'dstill making no sense.)

another one is the schrodinger's cat thing you mention, which is a thought experiment. It says nothing about "whatever is happening in the universe is happening here and now" , what does that even mean? to conclude the double slit experiment to begin with, it required them to predict things that were not happening "now", and I have no idea what you mean by "here" in your context. We are not even at the same location, relativity says places differ in time, "here" is only a location you're actually in, other locations may not even be at the same time as yours.

You entire post is laughable. You are not even connected to the universe, because there is no "universe", don't get me wrong, there ar material things, but not some grandiose new agey hippie dippie universal entity you say "oh that's universe and I am a soul part of it" that's some outdated pantheistic religious nonsense

Edited by XxxDenyYourLies

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@XxxDenyYourLies woah, can you introduce yourself? Which country, age etc. Did you ever took psychedelics? How Do you come here

Refreshing to hear an old scool materialist who can judge over others experiences, dismiss them as insane.

Hint: Your eye pupils and the reaction on it are pure fantasy. Just a dream

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@XxxDenyYourLies You’re quite wrong, and actually it is your view that is terribly outdated. If I had to put a date stamp on it, I would say it fits somewhere between 1850 and 1920.

Your own argument “You know you’re wrong and that’s why you had to create a self-affirming post about it” could also be applied to you. In fact, since this is your only post on the forum, you’ve clearly created an account for the sole purpose of self-affirmation.

@everyone else 

You’re also wrong. Infinity cannot be captured or understood by the mind. it is fun to think about, but you’re making a grave mistake if you think you’ve somehow fully awoken. 

It is not possible to fully awaken. This is naivety. Trying to capture the ultimate truth is like trying to capture the entire Milky Way galaxy in a 30cm butterfly net.

The correct answer is *always* “I don’t know”.

Edited by axiom

Apparently.

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@Null Simplex But you still want to share it to us and you have invested a long message with intention to explain it to us. This is not by accident. Something in your subconscious does not agree with the solipsistic attitude.

Listen also to him and integrate him too. This is very important.

Listening to your subconscious messages is more profound than psychedelics.

Edited by Nivsch

🌻 Thinking independently about the spiral stages themselves is important for going through them in an organic, efficient way. If you stick to an external idea about how a stage should be you lose touch with its real self customized process trying to happen inside you.

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