Does an End Games Exist?

[Revolutionary Think]

When I first looked for something beyond boring regular existence as a Jewish Iranian first generation American I looked for something more than culture, education, a job, and having a family I looked to build a legacy on this Earth by being a voice for school reform for younger generations because I thought the education system we have here and around the world is abysmal because it destroys creativity and doesn't teach life skills so I always wanted young people and students to have a voice about what they think of it and how they're being treated. Then when school and campus shootings were really ramping up in the US and I was still in College I thought about my own mortality if there's an afterlife or not and I didn't want my life to end so abruptly and unfairly. So one of the Jewish youth places I went to invited this atheist turned rabbi Alon Anava who had a near death experience and the way he described his experience was so real and vivid that I believed him and was looking into becoming an orthodox Jew from a conservative Jew. I stumbled upon this extremely stage blue fire and brimstone rabbi Yosef Mizrachi who disgusted me so much with his sermons about eternal punishment in the afterlife for violating Shabbat that I could not reconcile that we could have a god as crazy and delusional as the one he was describing and little by little I was turned off by him.

Fast forward to me graduating from College I join this online (scam) course called JumpCut academy that teaches you how to become a successful YouTuber that actually makes money. I joined that in late 2016 basically when Trump became president elect and the Trump hate was at a fever pitch. My YouTube channel Revolutionary Thinking I wanted it to be about societal advancement, education reform, politics, and critical thinking with some comedy and fun sprinkled in. The entire time I had a problem with the culture that the US and the world that's influenced by US especially Hollywood culture lives in. I couldn't stand celebrity obsession, instant gratification, mindless tribalism, and our hyper consumerist society I was looking to create a coalition of critically thinking people that wanted to improve their lives and improve society over all. That's when another person who was in me in that JumpCut course Jeet Tan heard I was like this and he introduced me to @Leo Gura's content. I said FINALLY a person who is outside of that Hollywood celebrity and instant gratification sphere of influence. I was happy I found someone like that. I couldn't stand main stream culture and or society because it was so full of hypocrisy and contradiction. An education is sooo important yet, schools don't teach you about finances, relationships, or life skills. If you get a degree you'll earn a million dollars more than your peers with high school diplomas over a life time yet, plenty of people with degrees working minimum wage jobs, unemployed and underemployed. When I saw Leo's content and actualized.org I jived with it so much because the things I noticed he noticed as well. 

Although somewhere in the back of my mind I would always day dream and fantasize about an end game and/or a happy ending. It would be me making a speech on education and the proper way the system would work in front of millions of people televised through out the world. I'd be a world renowned visionary or something like that. Then I'd be paid to jet off to other countries and advise people I'd live in a penthouse with a helicopter on it. I'd be an ambassador teaching people good healthy communication skills that saved relationships and I'd bring peace to the world. Yes I understand very grandiose and narcissistic of me but, hey I like having dreams. Then Leo introduced me to another end game in the form of enlightenment. Instead of being an Orthodox Jew I would listen to Leo instead. I liked the way his logic and reasoning worked. 

Now though I'm stated to think of the entire idea of an end game and/or happy ending being moot as in just a mirage in the desert of life. As a young person I'd always follow the rules I'd keep my hands to myself, come to school on time, listen to the teacher, participate, and keep my grades up. Then in the 08 crash I was told that employers hardly look at grades and they look more at your personality and attitude and as a young person on the spectrum sometimes I'd have trouble socially and I was never told that would be a problem down the road as long as I just kept my grades up I'd do well in life. So it felt as though I busted my behind in school for the promise of a bright future and it all turned out to be a lie. 

Unfortunately it seems like no matter whatever you do you're always going to be told it's not enough and you didn't do it the right way. There's also a possibility that you find out your teacher/professor/boss/parent/(insert authority figure here) is a fraud and/or doesn't know what their doing and admits to it later. It seems as if I'm seeing a pattern with Leo now. a year goes by he's had an enlightenment... 2 years another more profound enlightenment... 3 years after that the ultimate enlightenment... 4 more years, the super ultimate enlightenment... 5 more years the super duper ultimate enlightenment... 6 more years the super duper enlightenment to end all enlightenments... 7 more years (oops) now this is the REAL super duper ultra ultimate enlightenment to end all enlightenments. As you can see it's becoming a bit absurd to me. If you ever watched Dragon Ball Z and Frieza's power level was over a million in his first transformation and he had two other in addition to that but, little by little even in his final form it was completely meaningless against other later villains like Cell and Majin Buu that's what I think is going on with Leo and his assorted awakenings. It seems like the Jeff Bezos of awakenings is up there and talking about how we'll never actually accumulate as much as he has. Not only that but, it seems as if you're damned if you do and damned if you don't because even if you were the hardest of hard core of his followers he'll tell you that whatever you do is not enough anyway even if you did it all... With this new course he talked about on his blog sounds like the hunger games/squid games of awakenings because there's so many traps and traumas involved when it comes to this stuff. 

So where am I going what's my point? Good question in the early days me and Leo vibed on so much and I think we still do. Am I angry at him or jealous of him no because we are one and the same in the grand scheme of things. Let's just say I'm confused I am extremely confused WITH ONE MAJOR CAVEAT! In the past my confusion would make me neurotic and frustrated because I NEEDED TO KNOW I needed to feel like the wise sage. That was a function of my ego. Now I do not judge myself for my confusion I love myself for my confusion and I embrace and welcome it. I'm not obsessing over some kind of end game that when it finally happens I can finally be happy and content. I'm confused and go along with it knowing that it's a good thing it's not something to be neurotic about. Life is a journey not a destination and I spent so much of my life having a destination fixation I am happy that I've grown out of it and can embrace the present moment with out constantly obsessing over the past and the future. I have a long way to go and that just makes me that much more excited and thrilled to see what awaits me. 

[Revolutionary Think]

Any one else care to elaborate on where they are with Leo's ideas now?