More Stringent Enforcement Is Coming

[Leo Gura]

I am cracking down on misbehavior on this forum. Enforcement of our Guidelines is getting tighter. I will be banning more people in the future who continue to cause drama and distractions here.

I urge everyone to re-read the Forum Guidelines and be on your best behavior. Think twice before you post something. People causing drama, spreading ignorance, right-wing ideology, or even just repeatedly asking stupid questions will be banned.

I want to see a higher level of intelligence on display within this community. We need fewer people but higher quality people here.

In general I will say this: post intelligently, not like an animal. I will work to improve my style of communication here as well to set a better example. Sometimes I am too casual, flippant, or crass and it sets the wrong example.

[funkychunkymonkey]

i tend to stay quiet as is but i think this is a good thing 

[Hardkill]

This concerns me because I’ve already gotten some warning points a long time ago. Now I feel like I really have to walk on eggshells.

[Leo Gura]

I want people feeling somewhat like they have to walk on eggshells here. This place has been too much of a free-for-all playground for too long.

Notice that some users have been here for years and have zero warning points. How come they can do it but you can't? What are they doing that you're not? In general, think twice before you post something. Sometimes it's better to just be silent rather than spouting off.

Find ways to communicate that don't create a trail of drama and chaos.

[puporing]

Feel like I can breathe again

[Hardkill]

19 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

I want people feeling somewhat like they have to walk on eggshells here. This place has been too much of a free-for-all playground for too long.

Notice that some users have been here for years and have zero warning points. How come they can do it but you can't? What are they doing that you're not? In general, think twice before you post something. Sometimes it's better to just be silent rather than spouting off.

Find ways to communicate that don't create a trail of drama and chaos.

Okay, I’ll admit that I’ve made a couple of mistakes on here that were my fault and therefore warranted a few warning points. However, years ago I got some warning points for a post I made that one of your mods deemed as racist, sexist, and homophobic. Yet I am telling that what I said in that post was not racist, sexist, or homophobic at all.

[Kksd74628]

GENERAL ADVICE

Speak like you would speak to your grandma, give feedback like you would to your best friend and use proper grammar like you would write essay to your teacher. In everything you say use valid arguments, explanation and logic. If you decide to post then write with an intention to put smile on someone's face.

SUGGESTION

@Leo Gura We could actually have best comment of the month/week highlighted on every different discussion area, because that would increase motivation to post something very helpful. That would also increase quality of actualized.org overall.

ACTUALLY VERY GOOD EXAMPLES

19 minutes ago, Hardkill said:

Yet I am telling that what I said in that post was not racist, sexist, or homophobic at all.

@Hardkill  It's not about how you see your own message, but how others see it. Point of communication is to express oneself as clearly as possible and if people understood your message wrongly then most likely you could have hone your tone how you represented it. I agree that it feels horrible when people take your words wrongly, but remember that only thing that you can do by yourself is to communicate as clearly as possible and everything outside of this is matter of luck from your point of perspective.

58 minutes ago, Hardkill said:

Now I feel like I really have to walk on eggshells.

Just use good manners and try not to hurt anyone's feelings and that will defend you from not getting ban. Of course people will anyways sometimes get angry from nothing, but as I said, you have no control of that.

GOOD TOPIC TO READ

-joNi-

Edited February 16, 2022 by Kksd74628

[supremeyingyang]

'More quality' / deeper topics on the forum is just what I've asked for multiple times. I will miss the chaos, but if that really improves the quality I can see the value.

Let's see how this will work, I take it as a challenge. If it's not good I leave.

 

Edited February 16, 2022 by supremeyingyang

[lostingenosmaze]

I only just got here, no warning points, but sometimes I wonder if I'm really pushing the line with the little shitposting I've been doing 

[Tangerinedream]

 

3 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

I am cracking down on misbehavior on this forum. Enforcement of our Guidelines is getting tighter. I will be banning more people in the future who continue to cause drama and distractions here.

I urge everyone to re-read the Forum Guidelines and be on your best behavior. Think twice before you post something. People causing drama, spreading ignorance, right-wing ideology, or even just repeatedly asking stupid questions will be banned.

I want to see a higher level of intelligence on display within this community. We need fewer people but higher quality people here.

In general I will say this: post intelligently, not like an animal. I will work to improve my style of communication here as well to set a better example. Sometimes I am too casual, flippant, or crass and it sets the wrong example.

Good, and yes, you are one of the biggest examples here and people look to you with a lot of authority/guide so would be nice if you would also take more responsibility for things you say.  Especially in the dating section and with regards to women in particular.  Infact, let’s be honest, one of the reasons for a lot of the drama going on there is because of things you’ve said which trigger the girls here. ? I’ve said it before many times, maybe I should move on and quit the forum for a while.  would be nice to see the forum growing in a more loving direction. 
the forum is a reflection of you, so when you are seeing us as immature or causing drama, or saying vulgar things, it’s you too. 

Edited February 16, 2022 by Tangerinedream

[Dryas]

Good

[vizual]

You want a high quality community, but you have a lot of low quality mods who give warning points without proper reasoning. And there’s no way to appeal a warning or a ban, to my knowledge. This is bullshit. In stead of a community, you will be creating a low conscious dictatorship if you don’t make any changes apart from just cracking down on users.

[Tim R]

Yes, it's possible to appeal a warning (mods don't ban btw, that's up to Leo), that doesn't mean that the warning will be revoked tho. Some people say for example racist or sexist things without even realizing that it's racist / sexist, they then get a warning and feel that it's totally unjustified - but not because it is, but because they don't see how what they said was racist / sexist. That is literally like 99% of warnings & complaints about warnings. 

Having like 3 or 5 warning points is really no big deal and these people almost never complain, maybe they said something disrespectful or insulting, no problem. They learn from it and move on.

For some mysterious reason it's always those who have like 15 warning points who feel treated unfairly. I wonder why...

20 warning points!!! is what is needed to get you kicked out of here, 20!! Most people have ZERO warning points and the majority of people who have any warning points? They have less than 3, some of them even have warnings without any points.

How is this? Is it because the mods and Leo are tyrannical dictators who will warn and ban anyone who dares to speak up? 

Or is it, perhaps, that these people simply don't know how to conduct themselves and are too immature to recognize when they do so? 

Take some responsibility for what you say on this forum, read the guidelines and don't behave like on a goddamn public toilet, is this really asking too much? 

[Leo Gura]

19 minutes ago, vizual said:

And there’s no way to appeal a warning or a ban, to my knowledge.

You can appeal warnings to me.

Bans are hard to appeal by their nature. Mods are not supposed to be banned people other than in extreme cases, and also consulting with me about bans.

Occassionally Mods maybe make a bad call, since this work is subjective. I try to overlook those cases. Sometimes warnings are reversed and Mods are corrected. But mostly they make good calls.

[Leo Gura]

I will try to be less biased in the Dating subforum.

[Roy]

How does this relate to moderators? I feel I've been pretty lax about handing out points, yet there are more times than I can count on my fingers where people are obviously not here to learn or try at all. They continuously ask dumb questions, or want to just repeat the same things without engaging in new information being given to them. It gets in the way of helping the people that are here to actually improve their lives. They may not consciously or intentionally be trying to be disruptive, but the damage is all the same. How do we respond effectively to that?

Of course I also need to reflect and improve my own posting too.

[Barbara]

You want to promote evolution within the forum but you're doing so by creating a fear-based and strict environment. I won't say it won't work. But you'll have a micro tyranny going. And like all the tyrannies it will implode. I don't know if you're doing compartmentalization and feel the need to apply blue rules here, but this just shows a lack of real-world experience managing communities.

You were criticizing Daniel for being utopian and elitist, and I believe that's why you do all that pickup vids on your youtube, but what are you trying to do here then? Make it congruent.

[Tim R]

@Barbara If people feel ike they need to fear Leo/the mods, then maybe this isn't the right place for them. What exactly is the tyranny here? Having rules and guildelines? Not letting people say whatever they want and implementing measures against it? Most people are perfectly content with the way this community works... 

[Leo Gura]

38 minutes ago, Roy said:

How does this relate to moderators? I feel I've been pretty lax about handing out points, yet there are more times than I can count on my fingers where people are obviously not here to learn or try at all. They continuously ask dumb questions, or want to just repeat the same things without engaging in new information being given to them. It gets in the way of helping the people that are here to actually improve their lives. They may not consciously or intentionally be trying to be disruptive, but the damage is all the same. How do we respond effectively to that?

Of course I also need to reflect and improve my own posting too.

If you spot habitually problematic users, PM me about them and we will discuss it.

Don't just ban people without consulting me.

24 minutes ago, Barbara said:

You want to promote evolution within the forum but you're doing so by creating a fear-based and strict environment. I won't say it won't work. But you'll have a micro tyranny going. And like all the tyrannies it will implode. I don't know if you're doing compartmentalization and feel the need to apply blue rules here, but this just shows a lack of real-world experience managing communities.

You were criticizing Daniel for being utopian and elitist, and I believe that's why you do all that pickup vids on your youtube, but what are you trying to do here then? Make it congruent.

There is a reason tyrannies exist. They are suitable when people refuse to behave.

I try not to go overboard with it. Power is always corrupting to those who wield it.

[Barbara]

4 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

There is a reason tyrannies exist. They are suitable when people get unruley.

I think you have a great opportunity here to show otherwise and how deeper levels of conscience bring up different solutions to unruliness.