Addicted to porn

[Tangerinedream]

2 minutes ago, Something Funny said:

you act as if there was just one genre of stereotypical porn. Like porn shot in professional studios where a guy is a plumber and a girl is a blond with fake boobs.

 

Haha I know.  But Leo said he only watches ‘high quality’ so I’m imagining a hot shot studio with the best cameras, lights and the best looking actors and all the trimmings. 

[PurpleTree]

7 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

It's your attitude that makes women suck at sex.

fixed it for ya 

 

stop it you're just mad because of adobe

6 minutes ago, Tangerinedream said:

if a girl is bored she’s just not that hot for you.  Could be tired, but mostly just not into you enough. She feels like of ‘blah’ about it. 
Especially someone you don’t know and have just pulled from the club or whatever. 

some women also just can't move (also guys)

i knew this woman she was nice but just couldn't move great, like she danced horrible 

 

@Etherial Cat & @Tangerinedream how many women have you slept with anyway?

i'm not saying leo is right but i guess he slept with much more women anyway

 

 

Edited February 15, 2022 by PurpleTree

[Hardkill]

13 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

I don't have enough data to make that conclusion.

Oh Okay. 

[Bando]

Everyone's different I know when I quit porn a while back my life got substantially better and I also know others who experienced the same. As others had already said in this thread usually a porn addiction is a symptom of something else in your life. There's nothing wrong with masturbation but frequent porn use messes up your mind.

Also if you have a gf or someone your seeing frequently how tf are you not getting your sexual needs met? I have a high sex drive and I dont have the issue that Leo keeps talking about 

 

[something_else]

1 minute ago, Bando said:

my life got substantially better

Better how?

[Leilani]

@Leo Gura

Please watch this

[Etherial Cat]

1 minute ago, PurpleTree said:

stop it you're just mad because of adobe

Leo is particularly petty with me.  

He earned it. 

2 minutes ago, PurpleTree said:

 

@Etherial Cat & @Tangerinedream how many women have you slept with anyway?

i'm not saying leo is right but i guess he slept with much more women anyway

 

 

I'm the woman. 

Nothing else to say.

[Danioover9000]

8 hours ago, Danioover9000 said:

@Gabith

   It depends on how a person views pornography and what stage, cognitive and moral development, state of consciousness and life experiences in other domains and sexual domain that one has, to put pornography in it's proper context.

   It also depends on how your consumption of pornography impacts your other areas of life including career, finance, relationships, intimacy, health and fitness, home environment, entertainment, hobbies, spirituality and emotional mastery. If, for you OP, porn has overall had a negative impact on more than half of those doamins of life, then consider quitting and figuring out how to quit in your own way. However, I suggest not to take pornography for granted, as pornography has a function ib society that it serves.

   If you think about it more, pornography has an importance in society, to provide ways of exploring your sexuality, with yourself mainly, or a partner, while mostly being a way of funneling most of people's horniness in a safer way, comparable to getting a drink. When alcohol was made illegal and prohibited from it being served in clubs and bars, it went mostly in the black market, and had a backlash and seen crimes rise in relation to, well, selling alcohol. How do you all think would happen, if pornography was completely illegal and is prohibited? 

[puporing]

Well... I guess it's a bit obvious but it literally takes two to tango.

In my experience, most people are just not that invested in developing sexual skills and being committed to overcoming the awkwardness of expanding their capacity unless they consciously make this a priority in their life, on top of things like self-actualizing and being the best partner they can be for the other. Empathy is not the norm it seems. 

[PurpleTree]

2 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

Leo is particularly petty with me.  

He earned it. 

I'm the woman. 

Nothing else to say.

sure 

but just because you're not like that doesn't mean many other women aren't like that

 

[Tangerinedream]

13 minutes ago, Something Funny said:

o it's useless to use that argument to convince someone like Leo that porn is bad.

There is no point trying to convince him,  he would rather blame the woman than face that his brain is hooked on the stimulation of porn..  I mean why not tell the woman what you want her to do in bed?  Some girls are also inexperienced.  It’s just stupid to blame someone else. 

[Etherial Cat]

34 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

Female sexuality is very different from male sexuality, and porn if anything would be largely more wired towards a "masculine" type of sexuality. So if you're expecting from a girl to act just like in porn or enjoy herself if you wish to fuck her like porn, question whether you're not trying to feed a lion some vegetables.

 

9 minutes ago, Something Funny said:

@Etherial Cat it doesn't even have to be some niche feminist porn. It can literally be just some random couple with decent sex skills filming themselves to pay the rent, lol. 

My point is that what you are saying is an outdated stereotype that might have been true 20 years ago, but just isn't the case nowadays. So it's useless to use that argument to convince someone like Leo that porn is bad.

You are interpreting my posts and deducing stuff out of nowhere. 

I have never said it has to be some niche feminist porn, you said it.

I have never said porn was just one genre of stereotypical porn, you deduced it.

What I said is that porn if anything would be largely more wired towards a "masculine" type of sexuality, which is true. And then, I said that female oriented porn is niche, which is true as well. 

All the rest is you arguing with yourself... And distorting my words. Feminist porn and female oriented porn doesn't convey the same ideas. 

 

[Leo Gura]

@Etherial Cat You think guys don't know the difference between a girl who knows how to have sex and one who doesn't?

Lol

[Etherial Cat]

5 minutes ago, PurpleTree said:

sure 

but just because you're not like that doesn't mean many other women aren't like that

 

Sure.

But a lot of bad sex is due to a lack of emotional arousal on the female side.

In French, there is a famous saying which goes by "there are no frigid woman, only poorly approached ones".

The bottom is: a horny woman will be horny and do a lot of work. If she's not doing it, it means she's not that horny.

And becoming horny on the female side has a lot to do with the feelings she's got for a guy.

[Bando]

13 minutes ago, something_else said:

Better how?

Mind got clear, stopped treating women like sexual objects, was more motivated to meet new people and take dating more serious, felt more energy/focus, had more time on my hands for self-improvement, those were the big ones.

If you watch porn 2-3 times a month I don't see a problem in that but most people who watch it fap daily or have some type of addiction, all because of bigger issues in their life. 

I tell people to try quitting for 1 month and see what type of emotions or thoughts keep recurring. If you cant quit a stimuli for 30 days you have an addiction and you should ask yourself if its decreasing your quality of life.

[Etherial Cat]

2 minutes ago, Something Funny said:

It sounds like you are presuming that Leo watches a certain stereotypical kind of porn. But how do you know what porn does he actually watch and how does he wish a girl to act. From what he wrote, it seemed to me like he was just complaining about some girls being too passive and expecting him to be the only one to put in some effort.

No, the meaning behind my words was that female sexuality is different from what is displayed in porn, and thus sex will end up being different IRL.

[puporing]

22 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

No, the meaning behind my words was that female sexuality is different from what is displayed in porn, and thus sex will end up being different IRL.

Sorry but I have to disagree with this, it totally depends on the person... and I also cannot claim to know what other women are like in this regard.

EDIT: But I'm not a sociologist/sexologist and do not know whether I'm just some outlier case lol.

Edited February 15, 2022 by puporing

[Tangerinedream]

3 hours ago, puporing said:

@Tangerinedream Unpopular opinion, but it could also be a product of childhood unmet needs, which gets transmuted into an addiction when puberty hits. At least this is how a lot of therapists see things/are trained to view things, in addition to explanations such as not being in compatible/healthy relationships, understanding oneself, lacking in skills to communicate needs/wants to partner(s).

 

9 minutes ago, puporing said:

Well... I guess it's a bit obvious but it literally takes two to tango.

In my experience, most people are just not that invested in developing sexual skills and being committed to overcoming the awkwardness of expanding their capacity unless they consciously make this a priority in their life, on top of things like self-actualizing and being the best partner they can be for the other. Empathy is not the norm it seems. 

Yes I agree with you here.  It’s so hard for people to form any real connections these days, everyone seems so shallow, yet also not willing to put effort in a o getting to know someone, people treat eachother as disposable garbage. Mix all that in with the brains addiction dopamine, It’s the same way we are all addicted to social media. It’s not even about the sex or the relationships anymore, it’s only about the quick dopamine rush.  That’s what makes porn so appealing.  It’s easier and less effort.  You don’t have to try and connect with someone.  What I experienced in the past was when I just casually started to watch porn, it became a habit, and every night before bed it was like I had to watch porn, as casually as checking Facebook. I was single at the time, was finding it hard to meet people to form real connections with. I didn’t get any kind of connection or needs met from watching it though. it was just quick transaction.  I actually started to recoil at the idea of sex with a real person.  It seemed easier to watch porn. 
 

[PurpleTree]

12 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

Sure.

But a lot of bad sex is due to a lack of emotional arousal on the female side.

In French, there is a famous saying which goes by "there are no frigid woman, only poorly approached ones".

The bottom is: a horny woman will be horny and do a lot of work. If she's not doing it, it means she's not that horny.

And becoming horny on the female side has a lot to do with the feelings she's got for a guy.

do you think women often act horny if they aren't because they think guys like it?

[Tangerinedream]

4 minutes ago, PurpleTree said:

do you think women often act horny if they aren't because they think guys like it?

Yes.  Why do you think so many women fake orgasms? Because they aren’t turned on enough to be able to cum.