Causes of rut or heartbreak

[Rishabh R]

After watching the video The power of asking questions as I question myself - What causes me to get into a rut ? I got the following answers:

- Because I crave/am needy to intimacy.

- Because I take every interaction seriously

- Because I get preattached with every girl that comes in my life 

- Because of procrastination to contemplate or question

- The thought that every girl is beautiful ( here I mean in sense of combination of both charecter and face by the way sorry if I have hurted anyone by this )

- Many assumptions about someone 

- By thinking that that person is mine 

- By basing my success and failure on someone's approval and dissapproval

- Because I think that having a relationship is good and more important than having values( yeah I am absolutely wrong in this point of view )

@Leo Gura and guys what are your thoughts on it ? Am I getting the correct answers or questioning/contemplating correctly?

 

 

 

 

[puporing]

@Rishabh R I'm sorry... Sounds like you're just very lonely and struggling to connect. Don't blame yourself for wanting that and pursuing that. Just practice letting go better when someone you want to connect with doesn't want the same. Before you find a full blown relationship maybe look for connection with strangers, coworkers, friends to be, family members if they're healthy. Those will help too. Much love.

Edited January 30, 2022 by puporing

[Cathal]

The belief systems around you getting your needs met. 

As in that part of you that thinks you need to have/be something you're not to get what you desire, there's nothing wrong with anything you have written but at the same time you need to understand yourself better if you want to stop falling into your patterns over and over

[Rishabh R]

@puporing Well thank you and can I improve it by going out a lot and practicing ?

[puporing]

@Rishabh R Yeah of course! Having a sense of abundance by meeting lots of people will help with the getting too attached too quick problem too.

[Rishabh R]

@puporing Ok thank you ?