Is It Normal For A Man To Be Initmidated By A Very Attractive Woman?

[Peace and Love]

@ajasatya

6 hours ago, ajasatya said:

@Peace and Love i see that you're struggling very hard with conditioning, still expecting to be approached by the perfect man.

my advice: just be sincere and face your fears. if you find a man attractive, go for it. be open for questions and ask him everything you need.

my best advice: heal yourself completely already. find your peace without the need for social approval. go to vipassana retreats, zen sesshins, yoga courses. it's your happiness that's on the table.

Yeah I definitely need to make that a priority this year.  I have a tendency to focus on helping other people, than I forget to work on myself.  It is a mental addiction that I need to break and figure out.   I figured it out it was a huge problem when I did Leo's childhood vow video and exercises.  It will be hard shifting my focus, but I know I can do this.  i just need to draw out some kind of action plan so I can get this done.

[Shin]

Well, I know people, including myself, that after their first real good relationship, fully understood what I was trying to say.

So maybe you'll have to find a really decent relationship to understand all this, but at the same time, if it works too well, you could be trapped into it and never actualized later in your life (or maybe not, who knows).

The other alternative is to go "all-in" in awareness/self-actualization work, like Ajasatya said, but depending on your current habits and awareness level, it could take a very long time (and you could give up).

Both approach works, but I think the first one is better for people who intellectually understand that a relationship does not add anything to your self-worth/love, but lacks the experience, and the second is preferable for people who already knows that by experience, and are just tired of it.

 

Quote

Yeah I definitely need to make that a priority this year

Not this year, now,

Don't think in future terms.

 

Edited January 10, 2017 by Shin

[DJ]

22 hours ago, Peace and Love said:

And how can a girl who may be extremely attractive (to the opposite sex) appear less INTIMIDATING?!?  lol  How can we be more approachable?

Make eye contact and smile.

[SFRL]

@Peace and Love women should not make themselves less hot looking because guys get intimidated by their sexiness. If women stop wearing sexy clothes, and lipstick, no longer do their make-up, no longer wear high heels, and no longer dance sexy in the club because guys are afraid to talk to them.......thats INFLATION. Everybody loses. 

Honestly I believe that if a woman is not slightly 'intimidating' then she is not worth it. Then you can  do better. 

As a guy you have to understand that feeling 'INTIMIDATING'. 

Intimidating is not what it really is. Its something else. Its: "Flight or flight". 

Everybody has that mechanism. When you are faced with a dangerous or challenging situation you can do two thing. 1)Run 2)Fight.

It was that way when men had to hunt Mammoth to eat, and its like that when you have to approach a woman. 

Back in prehistoric days you could put traps to catch rabbits, You could pick berrys if you wanted to play it real safe. But the meat and resources like hide and bone from the Mammoth were far more tasty and rewarding. That did come with a risk though. So you had to choose make that kill or eat berrys. 

The same when you approach a woman. The sexier the woman the more options she has with men.  So as a guy to stand out you have to bring your A-game. Or you might get rejected. But the reward is higher as well. 

Also for personal development as a guy when you want to get that sexy woman. That way you cant cut any corners. You have to build yourself up to be the quality guy that can get women like that.  

So a guy has to embrace that fight or flight feeling. Understand that what he has spotted is a woman that is not 'intimidating' but worth effort. And get hunting.

Or he can run and eat berrys.  

Edited January 10, 2017 by STC

[Guest Annetta]

@Peace and Love It's frustrating, but looks really aren't everything.  it definitely does help, - i went from being hot to much less so in like two years - and from experience there is power in female beauty, but it doesn't last forever.  we get older and that power gets passed down to a new generation, and then that will happen for them, too, and so on and so on.

there are a whole lot of people who have lifelong relationships.  ugly people.  fat people.  short people, tall people, sick people, poor people, wealthy people... so there's something inside everyone that is beautiful - and that lasts forever.  sometimes it just takes some time to find that in someone else who sees it in you.  it's had to remember that sometimes, esp if you're like me and have self image issues, or if you're like me and infp - dreamy and idealistic.  but that's the reality of it.  that you're 100 percent acceptable.  even right now without any of that self help; self work stuff.  always, always, always, and it's always been like that.  :3

it can feel foreign to accept that, but it is the truth.