How to deal with suffering at work, school?

[ShardMare]

You are probably older than 20. You have experience at suffering in work, suffering weekdays. Most people suffer at school and at work. Theres a lot of people who just kinda survive the 6-8hrs or more and then say f*ck it and they are done for the day.
How to think about work and school to make the suffering more easy?
What to do to make work easier to go? Should i have an exciting weekend? Or meditate or pray before and after work? Think about god and im doing this work for him? Should i be grateful that i can even work at there? Should i just accept the suffering and develop deep feeling towards suffering? Should i exercise my butt off after work to remove the sh*tty stress?
I look at older people and im like damn how is he worked so much and why? How people work in an office 8or more hrs for an unconscious meaningless company?
Maybe because i have depression thats why i suffer so much more at school.
I always tell that going to school 8hrs is trash and suffering, drains my energy and my parents tell you dont have to do nothing just write in your exercise book. Its true i dont have to do much but still i hate it. I often imagine myself waking up from the table in class with my gun and shooting up the school.
We often joke around with my classmate whats the meaning of school and we tell to each other its about studying how to suck d*ck so we can learn how to suck a larger one later in life.
Its crazy cause other students dont seem to suffer as much.
Sorry for my language.

[Thought Art]

I personally think we have no way around work. So, it’s good we find a way to lower the suffering through whatever process that is. 
 

I personally find I suffer more from growing, and the ego backlashes associated with seeing the truth. Suffering can be good if we must go through it. 

Your here to become passionate about life. If your 20, decide right now to orient yourself to finding it creating work you enjoy. It’s out there. Waiting for you.

Find a way to cure the depression. Find your passion so you know that when you go to school you are building a powerful life for yourself. 
 

I dealt with anxiety and depression most of my life so I can understand you. But, life can be very beautiful.

Edited January 24, 2022 by Thought Art

[Terell Kirby]

Escaping wage slavery is key.

Schooling really only exists to prepare you for being a wage slave anyway.

[Thought Art]

56 minutes ago, Terell Kirby said:

Escaping wage slavery is key.

Schooling really only exists to prepare you for being a wage slave anyway.

Yes but, don’t make more stress than necessary. Learn to enjoy everyday as it is. Make small steps. Feel.

[Thestarguitarist14]

Get side hustles.  The gig economy now allows you to leave your wage slave job and make even more money.

Edited January 24, 2022 by Thestarguitarist14

[Yarco]

You have to get out.

Otherwise you're consigning yourself to a miserable life.

My parents coerced me into going to school for a career path that wasn't authentic. Even working summer internships I could feel it draining the life out of me. After a couple years working in an office full-time I felt like I'd probably kill myself if I had to work another 40 years like that.

I remember at that internship, there was a generic questionnaire I had to fill out. One of the questions was "Do you feel like you have a good work-life balance" and I said no. They weren't very happy about that and basically the HR guy came and talked to me and tried to convince me that I have evenings and weekends and whatever and it was a pretty good company to work for.

Guess what happened to that guy? One morning on the way to work a few months later, he got in a head-on collision on the highway with a Wonder Bread truck and died instantly. Where's his work-life balance now? He'll never get that retirement that he wasted his whole life working a job he hated to get. Everybody was kinda sad for a day or two and moved on, he was just replaced, he was just a cog. Even his wife forgot him and was fucking other dudes a couple months later.

Maybe working a miserable job for 40 years is a noble goal if you have to do it for your kids and you feel like there's no other way. Otherwise you need to find another way to make a better life for yourself.

I had to find a way to make it work, to make money on my own, to make a life more suited to how I wanted to live. Now I've been doing that since 2017.

School is a bit different since it has a finite end date. If you're around halfway or more through your program, I'd stick it out. It's always better to have a degree to fall back on, or at least show people you're university material. If you're 1 or 2 semesters in and hate it then I'd cut your losses.

If you don't have a choice but to work a job you hate right now to survive... you can coast and do the bare minimum to not get fired. Lots of places you can have 1 headphone in and be listening to podcasts or self-improvement material while you work. That way at least you're multitasking and growing.

4 hours ago, ShardMare said:

I look at older people and im like damn how is he worked so much and why? How people work in an office 8or more hrs for an unconscious meaningless company?

I think it's fear, low self esteem, feeling like they don't deserve anything better. Not realizing there's another option.

I remember this woman at one place I worked. I could tell she was way smarter than me, and she seemed pretty miserable. Not outwardly, but in a depressed people-pleasing way. Her life was basically living for that 30 minutes during her lunch break when she could read her novel. Maybe going to a few concerts per year.

I don't know how people do it. 

Don't accept that it's normal

You deserve more

Edited January 24, 2022 by Yarco

[Michal__]

LP (either through the course or if you are confident enough you can try to find it out on your own) + equanimity (before equanamity you have to develop mindfulness!). 

+ Becoming better overall

[ShardMare]

@Terell Kirby ok but other people dont seem to suffer as much. Most people dont kill themselves, why? 

@Thestarguitarist14 thats the way

@Yarco thats sad. Its crazy how many people just get stuck in the office.

I dont understand how the working world works as im only a highschool student. Why cant people change jobs more frequently? 

[Yarco]

10 minutes ago, ShardMare said:

@Yarco thats sad. Its crazy how many people just get stuck in the office.

I dont understand how the working world works as im only a highschool student. Why cant people change jobs more frequently? 

Oh yeah, definitely don't drop out of high school. I assumed you were in college. Basically just find a couple of close friends and make the best of it. Dark humor like you share with your friend is a good way to cope.

Theoretically you can change jobs as much as you want. But if your resume has a lot of frequent job changes, companies will really question it. Or they might just discard your resume as you look like someone who has trouble holding down a job. Companies expect loyalty from you, but don't really offer any loyalty back to employees nowadays, it kinda sucks. Maybe it's a little better recently with job shortages during the pandemic and employees have a little more leverage.

[itachi uchiha]

school is  a place where indoctrination happens. u r being trained as a future factory worker. school will program u with many unhealthy beliefs.

if u wanna develop good study habits or good healthy habits, then read tiny habits by bj fogg

[Cathal]

@ShardMare  I think it's good you are feeling the way you do, you are feeling and experiencing what all of those people also experienced but once you build patterns and crevasses from belief systems that 'this is the way life is' or 'i have to do this' then you're fucked more or less.

Rebel more, do not adjust yourself to that lifestyle

[ChiLongQua]

use the positive mental attitude

positiv

[Medhansh]

19 hours ago, Yarco said:

You have to get out.

Otherwise you're consigning yourself to a miserable life.

My parents coerced me into going to school for a career path that wasn't authentic. Even working summer internships I could feel it draining the life out of me. After a couple years working in an office full-time I felt like I'd probably kill myself if I had to work another 40 years like that.

I remember at that internship, there was a generic questionnaire I had to fill out. One of the questions was "Do you feel like you have a good work-life balance" and I said no. They weren't very happy about that and basically the HR guy came and talked to me and tried to convince me that I have evenings and weekends and whatever and it was a pretty good company to work for.

Guess what happened to that guy? One morning on the way to work a few months later, he got in a head-on collision on the highway with a Wonder Bread truck and died instantly. Where's his work-life balance now? He'll never get that retirement that he wasted his whole life working a job he hated to get. Everybody was kinda sad for a day or two and moved on, he was just replaced, he was just a cog. Even his wife forgot him and was fucking other dudes a couple months later.

Maybe working a miserable job for 40 years is a noble goal if you have to do it for your kids and you feel like there's no other way. Otherwise you need to find another way to make a better life for yourself.

I had to find a way to make it work, to make money on my own, to make a life more suited to how I wanted to live. Now I've been doing that since 2017.

School is a bit different since it has a finite end date. If you're around halfway or more through your program, I'd stick it out. It's always better to have a degree to fall back on, or at least show people you're university material. If you're 1 or 2 semesters in and hate it then I'd cut your losses.

If you don't have a choice but to work a job you hate right now to survive... you can coast and do the bare minimum to not get fired. Lots of places you can have 1 headphone in and be listening to podcasts or self-improvement material while you work. That way at least you're multitasking and growing.

I think it's fear, low self esteem, feeling like they don't deserve anything better. Not realizing there's another option.

I remember this woman at one place I worked. I could tell she was way smarter than me, and she seemed pretty miserable. Not outwardly, but in a depressed people-pleasing way. Her life was basically living for that 30 minutes during her lunch break when she could read her novel. Maybe going to a few concerts per year.

I don't know how people do it. 

Don't accept that it's normal

You deserve more

So what to do? What's the alternative? How did you get out of this wage-slave market system?

[Ulax]

@ShardMare Do IFS therapy. Either using Jay Earley's workbook, or via a specialist therapist.

Loving-kindness meditation too.

[Nahm]

@ShardMare

Time & money. 

Lots of time, no money, not the funnest. Lots of money, but no time, not so great either. 

You can have and experience what you want. Making a dreamboard makes it easy. 

It’s a matter of focus, and ‘getting out of your own way’. It’s not a matter of motive and effort, but of knowing & focusing on what you do want, and allowing it. Discordant perspectives are a refuting, not an allowing. 

This, the experience, is heading somewhere. If you don’t like where you think it’s headed, change the thinking focused upon. Other students experiencing the same school aren’t suffering because they aren’t holding depressive perspectives. Dreamboard makes it’s very easy to be looking forward joyfully, now. 

 

Most practically speaking, definitely get that gun out of your possession. It’s tragic when a young person hasn’t let their conditioned discordant perspectives go yet, and does something from that youthful ignorance which dramatically changes the course of their life, only to later realize their troubles were their own discordant interpretations and perspectives all along.

Don’t internalize conditioning and resent the world or others, it’s circular thinking and is depressive, and is cowardly. Don’t fall for it by believing you are not enough, or you are not loved, or you are not love. You very much are. Express jealousy instead. It is how you receive what you want, the knowing of what you want, and is what you write on that dreamboard, and reality does become as you focus. Always has been. Takes some letting go of discordant views, and some humility, and some caring about how you feel. 

Much love.  

Choose self respect. Care about what you think, say and share. 

Choose alignment. Care about yourself, your life, and this, which is your creation. 

Exercise every morning. 

Meditate every morning. 

Eat clean. 

Make a dreamboard. 

Express & understand the emotions you are experiencing. 

You aren’t emotionally numb, clearly. You just don’t like how your perspectives & interpretations feel. Reach for a better feeling thought. Have fun with it. Do so simply for the magic of how it feels. See what becomes of it. If you do, you will be so ever pleasantly surprised. 

[ShardMare]

@ChiLongQua u should explain it not just write 1 sentence

@Ulax ill check out. Loving kindness is good. 

@Nahm yes you are true, im thinking badly about it. Yes i should try the last thing, its a good idea

Today i allowed all suffering in school. I had lot of anxiety and stress, so much chestpain but i felt much better than regular school days. I've felt pain and numbness but rn afternoon i feel better than regular. 

I think when you have a job you hate you have to experience a lot of pain consciously then it will get better so much

[Nahm]

2 hours ago, ShardMare said:

 

 im thinking badly about it.

That’s what you’re feeling. Don’t ‘beat up on yourself’ for it, or that’d be more of the same. ‘Reach’ for a better feeling thought. ?

Quote

Today i allowed all suffering in school. I had lot of anxiety and stress, so much chestpain but i felt much better than regular school days. I've felt pain and numbness but rn afternoon i feel better than regular. 

Believing it’s anxiety, stress, pain & numbness, thinking that way results in chest pain because it’s all discordant with the truth. Gotta let those concepts go and understand the emotions you are experiencing, orient toward truth.  

Quote

I think when you have a job you hate you have to experience a lot of pain consciously then it will get better so much

Hate is in view so to speak, it’s an emotion. You’re not emotionally numb (hate is an emotion you’re feeling). It’s guidance in regard to the way you’re thinking about the job. There was a point when you wanted the job, and now there is something you want more, and you can have that too, and the evidence is the job you have which you wanted but didn’t have before. Focus on what you want & it will indeed be. Make a dreamboard. ?? 

[universe]

On 24.1.2022 at 1:50 PM, ShardMare said:

I look at older people and im like damn how is he worked so much and why? How people work in an office 8or more hrs for an unconscious meaningless company?

Because most people take the easy route. Follow a path that others have laid out for them.

And they value security above many other things.

 

And they take whatever their reality is right now for granted, they don't want to change anything. Even though they might dream about living a more joyful and fulfilling life they hold other beliefs like "success is hard", "I can't do that", "other people are just lucky", "I can not change it".

 

It's this getting used to it.

 

Getting used to the horrible 8hr office job.

Getting used to the abusive partner.

Getting used to feeling depressed in school.

Getting used to riding a broken bike.

 

It slowly starts to not only become a thing they are used to. It's start to find it's way into their personality, their whole identity shifts.

 

For change to happen there needs to be a shift in perspective, a shift in identity, a shift in action, a different choice.

 

If you want to experience this shift in your life I would suggest you do what @Nahm layed out for you here freely and take the Life Purpse Course.

 

[Yarco]

6 hours ago, Medhansh said:

So what to do? What's the alternative? How did you get out of this wage-slave market system?

@Medhansh

Imagine if somehow you lived in a town where everyone was plumbers. Your entire family is plumbers, your grandfather and great grandfather were plumbers.

The equivalent of your question in this example would be "what's the alternative to being a plumber? how do I get out of the plumber system?"

If all you've known for your entire life is plumbing, the idea of other jobs doesn't even occur to you. There are other towns out there where people have all the normal jobs though.

The majority of people in this town never even know that anything other than plumbing is a possibility. They are so closed-minded it's not even an option.

The few that are aware of other jobs still rationalize to themselves why plumbing is the only way to go. Plumbing is the only honest profession. It's the only safe and secure job. People will always need plumbers. I couldn't possibly trust myself to be a dentist. Being a dentist is a fad. I'd have to learn something new or move to be a dentist. My partner might not like me being a dentist. I should just be a plumber.

I could blow people's minds and tell them that there's an endless number of jobs besides plumbers. Many of them pay better than plumbing, they're less work, they're more fulfilling, you don't have to pay dues to the plumber's union. I could literally spend all day writing down a list of possible jobs and never exhaust all of them. Most people would still reject it and stick with plumbing rather than consider another option, because those alternatives are so weird and uncertain.

In the same way being a plumber is one of endless jobs, having a job at all is just one of endless ways to make money and live your life.

There are so many alternatives I can't possibly list them all for you.

I don't know if there's any point in me listing a bunch of them, because it'd be the equivalent of saying you could be a plumber or an astronaut without knowing anything about you.

Realize that the education system has put blinders on you and made you so tunnel-visioned that all you can see is wage-slave jobs as an option.

Edited January 25, 2022 by Yarco

[SgtPepper]

Humbleness.