I do not EXIST. Does that mean everyone is allowed to make fun of me?

[Muhammad Jawad]

Should I allow my family & friends to make fun of me in front of all kinds of people in any kind of situation because, in reality, I do not exist?

How does a spiritually enlightened person deal with situations like people in his family & friends make fun of him, in front of everyone brutally & torture him emotionally & psychologically? Will he focus on: "I do not exist". Or something else?

[Vivaldo]

He will not bother 

If he is enlightened 

He will shut up... I am making fun of myself

[Khan 0]

4 minutes ago, Muhammad Jawad said:

Should I allow my family & friends to make fun of me in front of all kinds of people in any kind of situation because, in reality, I do not exist?

How does a spiritually enlightened person deal with situations like people in his family & friends make fun of him, in front of everyone brutally & torture him emotionally & psychologically? Will he focus on: "I do not exist". Or something else?

They are your imagination too. People are emotional robots nothing is insid of them. They don't exist either. If you don't think nothing never happens. When you sleep is your family exist?

[Muhammad Jawad]

1 minute ago, Vivaldo said:

He will not bother 

If he is enlightened 

He will shut up... I am making fun of myself

Hi!

Thanks a lot for your response.

What about the arising painful feelings, thoughts, and your image & respect in front of others?

Should I just let all these phenomena arise and let them pass? And remain equanimous? 

[Vivaldo]

There is no one single solution 

Apply nuance to the specific situation and then decide if u have to solve it or let it pass. 

Pain is necessary, it tells you that u r doing something wrong. Try correcting it and take full responsibility of every emotion and action.

[happyhappy]

@Muhammad Jawad be like a stoic. that could help.

[WelcometoReality]

1 hour ago, Muhammad Jawad said:

Should I allow my family & friends to make fun of me in front of all kinds of people in any kind of situation because, in reality, I do not exist?

If you don't like that they are doing it then it's probably best to tell them that you don't like it.

1 hour ago, Muhammad Jawad said:

How does a spiritually enlightened person deal with situations like people in his family & friends make fun of him, in front of everyone brutally & torture him emotionally & psychologically? Will he focus on: "I do not exist". Or something else?

We can only theorize about what he/she would do. My guess is that that person would leave such circumstances and find a better one to live his or hers life.

Just focusing on "I do not exist" is spiritual bypassing, it surpresses feelings. The better thing to do is to see what thought and feeling that come up when these situations come up. Then start to question those thought, are they actually true? Allow the feelings to come up fully and feel them.

[Muhammad Jawad]

4 hours ago, Khan 0 said:

They are your imagination too. People are emotional robots nothing is insid of them. They don't exist either. If you don't think nothing never happens. When you sleep is your family exist?

Yes, I understand these things but when negative situations emerge then my ego gets a strong start to react, and my color starts to change, my expressions start to change, a lot of negative feelings start to emerge. And I can not help myself to remain No-Self and become frustrated and sad and I become really miserable. 

[Muhammad Jawad]

3 hours ago, happyhappy said:

@Muhammad Jawad be like a stoic. that could help.

But how becoming a stoic will eliminate my suffering caused by the situation of making fun of me? 

[NoSelfSelf]

No. Setting boundaries no matter how enlightened you are,abuse is not something you tolerate...they treat you like that because you allow it and you are an easy target for their insecures egos to get a short lived satisfaction...you could use it to release emotions but still no abuse or toxic behaviour is allowed...

[Muhammad Jawad]

3 hours ago, WelcometoReality said:

If you don't like that they are doing it then it's probably best to tell them that you don't like it.

I told them many times, but they don't care and kept doing it. What is the solution in that case?

3 hours ago, WelcometoReality said:

We can only theorize about what he/she would do. My guess is that that person would leave such circumstances and find a better one to live his or hers life.

I do not want to leave my father because now I am young & successful because of him and he is old now. But he makes fun of me all the time in front of others which makes me a lot sad and miserable.

3 hours ago, WelcometoReality said:

Just focusing on "I do not exist" is spiritual bypassing, it surpresses feelings. The better thing to do is to see what thought and feeling that come up when these situations come up. Then start to question those thought, are they actually true? Allow the feelings to come up fully and feel them.

Will that help me to remain equanimous in future situations?

[Khan 0]

5 minutes ago, Muhammad Jawad said:

Yes, I understand these things but when negative situations emerge then my ego gets a strong start to react, and my color starts to change, my expressions start to change, a lot of negative feelings start to emerge. And I can not help myself to remain No-Self and become frustrated and sad and I become really miserable. 

That i the one that gets frustrated is the ego. You have to control it now. Than ride it. It is not real you. When you start to control it you will realize whatever the situation will be is only left as love. Your eyes dont see anything, whatever is in front of you is just a movie. Dont take it seriously, take your popcorn and eat it. Have fun watch the game. It is all you. 

[Muhammad Jawad]

3 minutes ago, blankisomeone said:

First of all, yes you exist. Hello.

And real non-duality is something like: I am in YOU. But YOU are NOT in me. So back off!

Set your proper boundaries and don’t let people make fun of you. You can learn to play along if they’re just bantering. But if it goes to far, set boundaries.

Personal "I" is just a thought. It's not an actual identity. There is only one awareness and everything is arising and passing in it.

 

I tried to set boundaries many times but I am not able to set boundaries against my own father.

[Muhammad Jawad]

5 minutes ago, NoSelfSelf said:

No. Setting boundaries no matter how enlightened you are,abuse is not something you tolerate...they treat you like that because you allow it and you are an easy target for their insecures egos to get a short lived satisfaction...you could use it to release emotions but still no abuse or toxic behaviour is allowed...

That's 100% true. And yes "abuse" is truly the correct word for my situation. My Father makes a lot of fun of me, in front of his colleagues, friends & other family member and he abuses that behavior.

How do I stop my own father from abusing me? especially in front of others. I always respect him and talk to him politely and I always obey him. But still, he keeps targeting me. 

How do I help myself? How do I protect myself from this abuse?

I have told him many times that I do not like it and feel really bad and then he makes fun of me on that topic that I feel bad. and he does not change his behavior. 

What will you do in that kind of situation?

[Muhammad Jawad]

11 minutes ago, Khan 0 said:

That i the one that gets frustrated is the ego. You have to control it now. Than ride it. It is not real you. When you start to control it you will realize whatever the situation will be is only left as love. Your eyes dont see anything, whatever is in front of you is just a movie. Dont take it seriously, take your popcorn and eat it. Have fun watch the game. It is all you. 

Right and let them use me as a door mat? 

[Muhammad Jawad]

8 minutes ago, blankisomeone said:

Well in that case, the fact that he is your father is just a thought

Right, well that's a good pointer. But that will lead me to avoid him and that behavior will make him sad and he will that I raised my son through a lot of struggles and now he is young and successful and now he avoids me. I do not want to break his heart that will break my heart as well. 

[Khan 0]

1 minute ago, Muhammad Jawad said:

Right and let them use me as a door mat? 

This is the ego too. Balance, nice talking, loving is the key. If the other person doesn’t understand you, just say i am sorry but i can not talk to you in this way. But be nice and gentle. Dont scream, yell etc. your mom , dad, wife whoever does that it dont matter. Thats what i do for myself.

[Gregory1]

12 minutes ago, Muhammad Jawad said:

That's 100% true. And yes "abuse" is truly the correct word for my situation. My Father makes a lot of fun of me, in front of his colleagues, friends & other family member and he abuses that behavior.

How do I stop my own father from abusing me? especially in front of others. I always respect him and talk to him politely and I always obey him. But still, he keeps targeting me. 

How do I help myself? How do I protect myself from this abuse?

I have told him many times that I do not like it and feel really bad and then he makes fun of me on that topic that I feel bad. and he does not change his behavior. 

What will you do in that kind of situation?

Kill him.

[Muhammad Jawad]

2 minutes ago, blankisomeone said:

Get this book: 

 

Right thanks. I will surely try to get & read it.

But I want to solve this situation spiritually by dissolving the illusory self-ego and remaining un-touched.

[Gregory1]

2 minutes ago, Muhammad Jawad said:

Right thanks. I will surely try to get & read it.

But I want to solve this situation spiritually by dissolving the illusory self-ego and remaining un-touched.

This won't solve your problem.