I DesERvE

[Preety_India]

This is so hard for me to do. Holding on to this thought that I deserve.

 

Edited January 17, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

I have to start some positive affirmations.

Affirmations like—

I deserve love. 

I deserve pampering myself 

I deserve gentleness. 

I deserve appreciation 

I deserve compassion 

I deserve acceptance 

I deserve praise 

I deserve warmth and welcome 

 

Edited January 17, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

I deserve all the good things in life.. 

 

[Preety_India]

I don't like to consider myself dumb but this question has been coming to me quite often now. 

Am I really dumb? 

Sometimes I feel like I am the dumbest person out there. 

I feel like I am stupid.

 

Edited January 17, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

Maybe sometimes it's important to know that you are dumb because it helps you to humble yourself and know that you must be on the wrong path 

 

When I thought about how much I need to use objective thinking, I can see how dumb I'm acting. 

I am not sure if the imaginary characters of Greta, Sabina and Jessica are really helping me. 

Greta was the gazer. Sabina was an intimate friend.. Jessica was a therapist.

 

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Edited January 17, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

I don't think I am exactly dumb. But I'm not too intelligent either. 

I wouldn't have fallen for toxic relationships if I were that smart.. 

I think I am more anxious than dumb. 

Also I think I am more emotional than average and that clouds my judgement. 

I also observe that I have a tendency to do things that attract toxicity towards me. Especially in the emotional and psychological sense. 

Part of the reason why I neglect myself is because I was never taught to take care of myself like other regular children in my childhood. 

I was always told to push my priorities away and consider other things as important "first." 

 

 

[Preety_India]

It could be that I'm doing all sorts of dumb things without realizing it.

Edited January 17, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

I think if I have to rate dumbness on a scale of 1 to 5, I would rate myself somewhere near 3 on that scale..

So I'm not the dumbest because there are too many factors that make taking intelligent decisions very tough for me.. 

Yet I'm not "average" smart either because I'm aware that average smart people in my position would not have done what I did. 

So i would say that most people don't fall in the category of 1 to 5.

Yet a lot of dumb people fall in the category of 1 to 5. And they can be rated in that. 

The least dumb can be assigned a score of 1..

The most dumb can be assigned a score of 5

 

And the ones like me are closer towards the higher level so I'm somewhere around 3.

Im not least dumb because I have done some pretty stupid stuff. 

Yet I'm not the dumbest. Because there are also a lot of mitigating factors to my behavior in the past. 

I also need to see that my personality didn't develop fully due to an abusive household.

 

Edited January 17, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

So all in all what I see in myself is a shit ton of immaturity. 

I can't say I'm fully or completely dumb. 

But I could be extremely immature due to how I was sheltered (but not coddled), and how I was never allowed to actually be myself. 

 

[Preety_India]

I also think that time is different for different people. 

Time runs too fast for me. 

Also I'm a bit slow. Quite slow. Much slower than others.. 

 

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Edited January 17, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

When you have weighted all perspectives and you see clearly that toxic habit is overall negative thing, something may click on you somehow and you change behavior.

[Preety_India]

Since time runs too fast for me, I should customize my life, my goals, priorities, strategies, needs, my actions around this fast running time. 

Also it could be that I feel time is running too fast for me since I'm too slow? 

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Edited January 17, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

I have come across this technique that I would call a circle on the beach or a circle in sand. 

Draw a circle in sand with 4 quadrants.. 

 

 

[Preety_India]

A beautiful quote.

 

Edited January 17, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

4 hours ago, Preety_India said:

I have come across this technique that I would call a circle on the beach or a circle in sand. 

Draw a circle in sand with 4 quadrants.. 

 

 

Draw a circle in sand with 4 quadrants. 

Label those quadrants. 

Then draw a line and mark it as notes. 

Draw several horizontal lines and write your notes. 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited January 17, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

Sets of labels for quadrants 

• Goals 
• Actions 
• Needs 
• Wants 
• Priorities

 

• Strengths
• Weaknesses 
• Opportunities 
• Threats

 

• Health 
• Mental 
• Physical 
• Emotional
• Psychological health 

 

• Your life 
• Your self and self image
• Your environment 
• Your mind 

 

 

Edited January 17, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

Live in abundance. 

 

[Preety_India]

 

Self Relationship Project 

• Set aside time only for yourself... 1-2 hours per day just discussing your own issues and your own challenges and your own self. This is a self awareness project 
• Develop your relationship with yourself 
• Heal your relationship with yourself (if you have a damaged relationship with yourself) 

 

Self awareness Project. 

 

• Catch yourself whenever you are neglecting yourself 
• Tell yourself that you absolutely deserve to take care of yourself 
• Get to know yourself better. (self exploration) what do you know about yourself? 
• Invest in self exploration. Explore who you are. 
• Explore your self image 
• Identify how you feel and who you are. 
• Express yourself as much as possible as openly as possible. I'll call this self expression exercise. 
• Explore your conditioning and programming. 
• Deprogram yourself 
• Do you know what you want?<this is a part of self awareness>
• Do you know what you need to do for yourself? <this is a part of self awareness >
• How many times do you focus on yourself (self focus)? 
• Have you gone deeper into yourself? (part of shadow work, this is a part of self introspection) 

 

• Self awareness 
• Self Introspection 
• Self relationship
• Self exploration 
• Self expression 
• Shadow work 
• Self focus 

 

Difference between self awareness, self exploration and self focus. 

What is self awareness? 

Being aware of what you want, what you need, what you are aware of what you are currently doing, and what you should be doing for your self. 

For example, if you are aware that you have a video game addiction but you are still playing a video game. You realize that you shouldn't be doing it and should be exercising in the gym instead. This is self awareness. Acute self awareness means you'll actually abandon the video game and start exercising. This means that you are not only self aware but you're very aligned with what you want. You are very coordinated with your own needs. 

Even if you are not fully aligned at least you are aware of what you need to do to be aligned. You have no confusion on that. 

 

What is self focus? 

Self focus is giving more time and attention to your self. Are you doing enough? Are you focused on everything else but not yourself? When was the last time you spent time alone or even discussed only about yourself? 

Living around narcissists will cause you to lose self focus because they will constantly demand your attention by talking about their needs with you. They will punish you if you begin to talk about your needs. The objective of their strategy is to not let you focus on yourself. But use all your time, energy and resources for themselves, not for you. 

 

What is self exploration? 

Self exploration is knowing who you are. Your personality. Your likes. Dislikes. Interests. Goals. Your personality type. Your values. Your temperament. Your stage of development. Your psyche. Your strengths. Your weaknesses. Your passions. Your limitations. 

 

 

 

I will also have exercises for self control. 

 

Edited January 17, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

 

 

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Edited January 19, 2022 by Preety_India