How to “integrally” daygame?

[SelfHelpGuy]

Hey, so there’s a clash with my integrity when it comes to daygame.

 

When the inevitable question comes up “So what are you up to?” 
I lie and say something like “oh I’m meeting friends or going to the shop”

But no, in truth - what I’m really doing today is talking to girls that pass by on the street. I come out 3 times a week and do 10 approachs each time.

 

Now, I’m debating on testing out an “honest day game” where I’ll simply say something like “to tell you truth, today I’m talking to beautiful women, it’s a fear I’d like to overcome” 

But the funny thing is, if I went to bar or club - I wouldn’t say the same thing if I was asked why I’m out. I’d just say “oh just going for a night out, meeting people”

 

So I’m torn here- it seems that there is this “untruth” involved with pickup/dating  in general. But my highest value is “authenticity”  and “integrity” (like that of Socrates) 

 

Is there a way to integrally Daygame? Or at least a “most integral way”?

Thank you guys,

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[something_else]

Yes. Don't pester women going about their day in environments that aren't normally that sociable like a street or a mall

At least don't make a habit of it, do it if you're out naturally and see a girl you find attractive

If you wanna spam approach girls go to a club, it's basically why they exist

[SelfHelpGuy]

@Knowledge Hoarder Fantastic reply man, that's a good point. 

Yeah I'm more interested in complete integrity. 

I also understand that daygame itself can be a bit intsuive which is another sticking point.

I myself dislike it if I'm intereracted with randomly, even seeing someone I know - sometimes I just wanna go the shop and go home. 

So out of consideration for peoples space would nightgame be a more integral option?

People go to a night club/bar for socialising and there's a higher degree of social consensus to mingle and chat with new people. 

Thoughts?

 

[SelfHelpGuy]

@something_else Interesting, yes I'm contemplating this. 

Take a look at my reply here: 

Just now, SelfHelpGuy said:

@Knowledge Hoarder Fantastic reply man, that's a good point. 

Yeah I'm more interested in complete integrity. 

I also understand that daygame itself can be a bit intsuive which is another sticking point.

I myself dislike it if I'm intereracted with randomly, even seeing someone I know - sometimes I just wanna go the shop and go home. 

So out of consideration for peoples space would nightgame be a more integral option?

People go to a night club/bar for socialising and there's a higher degree of social consensus to mingle and chat with new people. 

Thoughts?

 

 

[Lyubov]

I think you have some underlying shame and insecurity about getting your needs met. Little white lies and stuff like this shouldn’t bother as much as it sounds it does. This is a matter of beliefs and stuff you are holding onto and seeing the world through. All the same you could say “just walking around and enjoying my afternoon.” You don’t have to say that meeting friends stuff. You could just say I gotta go. There is always a level of cordial disclosure when it comes to interacting with strangers. You are at no liberty to disclose all that stuff and tbh I would not say you are approaching women on the street like that. It’s just socially weird. Maybe it won’t blow you out but I think you are overthinking this all a bit too much cause you’re nervous about approaching women and then it’s sending you to your head and you are then finding yourself in this cycle about feeling guilty about saying some white lie no one cares about cause you wanna add some social lubrication to the situation. What you gotta do is dig deeper here and resolve more of your self esteem and emotional stuff. You’ll find yourself just saying things congruent (and more truthful ) to how you feel the more emotionally healthy you feel inside. 

[Lyubov]

I think you have a somewhat narrow idea of integrity and truthfulness when applied to this domain of life. I’m not trying to twist it but this very dry, masculine, precise form of communication is not always the most honest either. There are other ways that are just as truthful. You gotta follow your heart. I’ve noticed what women consider to be the truth especially in relationships can be kinda different in an odd way i quite don’t understand myself.  Often it has more grey to it and doesn’t have the same sort of sharp corners found in how men interpret integrity and truthfulness. I would say seeing all these differences and learning how to navigate and bridge them is the sign of a master. Lead with your heart, tap into your own feminine to learn. Look at her and take in her beauty and try to let your heart guide the dialogue, not pick up lines you heard in a video being recited from your head. 

[SelfHelpGuy]

@Knowledge Hoarder That's a very good reframe.

Thank you, that helps me see it in a more positive light! 

[Leo Gura]

"So what are you up to?"

"Talking to a cute girl."

"You hit on all the cute girls here?"

"Only you baby. You're my one, I promise. I'm just a shy virgin "

- - - - 

Learn frame control!

[SelfHelpGuy]

@Lyubov Woah, very good.

That does partially encapsulate myself, insecurities do arise which I'm in the process of working through. 

I do have a very sincere interest in truth/authenticity which perhaps has overblown and cooped some of my deeper insecurities. 

Thanks for helping me see that!

[SelfHelpGuy]

@Leo Gura Loool touché, touché.  

 

[Yarco]

Just tell them that you're going for a walk. Even if your primary goal is day game, it's not a lie to say that you're also going for a walk. Going for a walk is a normal thing that normal people do.

Even a white lie like saying you're going to the shop isn't that out of integrity I don't think. Just don't be a creep and force women to engage in conversations too long if they're obviously uncomfortable and you already have more integrity than most guys.

[Terell Kirby]

Become a man that women are sexually attracted to .. so that all parties win (you and the girls).

[Jacob Morres]

i think you're using the word integral wrong. integrous might be better 

[Javfly33]

Dont make the mistsake of being "Absolutely honest" in dating. Or, do It But only if you know how to "own It" .

9 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

"So what are you up to?"

"Talking to a cute girl."

"You hit on all the cute girls here?"

"Only you baby. You're my one, I promise. I'm just a shy virgin "

- - - - 

Learn frame control!

??

[something_else]

21 minutes ago, Medhansh said:

What advantage will I get by framing myself as a shy virgin?

You're being too literal

By confidently proclaiming that you're a shy virgin you actually give the impression that you're the exact opposite

It's not about the literal words you say, it's how they're said

[ZenSwift]

15 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

"So what are you up to?"

"Talking to a cute girl."

"You hit on all the cute girls here?"

"Only you baby. You're my one, I promise. I'm just a shy virgin "

- - - - 

Learn frame control!

I need to learn more about this "frame" idea. 

[Javfly33]

4 hours ago, something_else said:

You're being too literal

By confidently proclaiming that you're a shy virgin you actually give the impression that you're the exact opposite

It's not about the literal words you say, it's how they're said

You havent understood it. Its not about her thinking or giving her the impression that you are the exact opposite.

Its about owning your frame.

 

[something_else]

8 hours ago, Javfly33 said:

You havent understood it. Its not about her thinking or giving her the impression that you are the exact opposite.

Its about owning your frame.

 

How is this different?

Owning your frame, displaying confidence are indicators that you're in fact not a loser or a virgin.

If you delivered that line confidently I guarantee you 95%+ of girls would assume you were joking

[Karmadhi]

@something_else

52 minutes ago, something_else said:

How is this different?

Owning your frame, displaying confidence are indicators that you're in fact not a loser or a virgin.

If you delivered that line confidently I guarantee you 95%+ of girls would assume you were joking

Spot on!

[Leo Gura]

The function of game is to scramble the logical mind.

There will not be sex when the logical mind is active.