Are a lot of women nice to you because of "Fear"?

[Javfly33]

Contemplating how ridiculous low results gives DMing Girls through social media (and even messagging them in online dating apps) Vs Approaching them in real Life, which in constrast ime gives surprisingly good reactions, i have come to the conclusion that lots of Girls Dont have a good reaction to you because they like you, But because they Dont want to be seen as rude.

See, its very easy to ignore somebody through the internet, but its emotionally (and physically) harder to do It face to face. 

[Preety_India]

This is very true. Often when a man approached me, I would always have a fear that he might think that I'm rude. So I would talk him politely. But if he was persistent and didn't get the clue that I'm not initiating anything, then I would mostly be blunt in the end, it leaves no option at that point. 

 

[ValiantSalvatore]

@Javfly33 From Leo's videos (IIRC) and my point of view yes and no ultimately I do not know as I have less experience approaching, yet writing now close to 700 women online. There is less incentive to be social to begin with so there could be many reason as why offline works better. Charm, better first impression, you being seen as social.

From listening to females perspective and talking to friends fear can play a big role as so men can be real asses as well as social repudiation/shaming. I think fear plays less a role online, it's way more bias. Imagine I approached 3 girls and almost got laid with the third one on the same night. And I've texted 700+- women with a 10 to 10% ratio 70+- matches 7+- dates. Which to my online course, which is clearly not red pill, to emphasis this, says is good. There is also less incentive to stereotype a person as this is socially not appropriate anymore, depending on country, place of origin etc. SD stage. Yes, fear plays a big role a female/women friend of mine told me she is scared walking alone in the forest etc. when she is in her home "village" I asked why? She answered because of people and you don't know what they end up doing when you are alone and she is quiet badass in a sense. If you are a 6 foot guy you'd not give a shit and there is less threat to begin with so your whole being does not recognize it. 

Building trust is also a process that happens online through proper questions and building rapport for instance having social pics with friends makes you less threatening. So if you might fear that you scare away people because you are a "chad" and usually a genuiently good hearted spirit, then take a picture with friends at best. They even recommended to take a picture with your mother of course in a full profile just to show. One guy said family pictures are great also for building trust. Makes you look non-threatening. I imagine never having done game just going out with a wing makes you less threatening also as it displays you being social and you generally are safer in a group as a human.

It's similar to being controlled at the airport when you travel alone, you just can be threatening as a male subject and cause a lot of assumptions.

Edited December 26, 2021 by ValiantSalvatore

[Loba]

1 hour ago, Javfly33 said:

Contemplating how ridiculous low results gives DMing Girls through social media (and even messagging them in online dating apps) Vs Approaching them in real Life, which in constrast ime gives surprisingly good reactions, i have come to the conclusion that lots of Girls Dont have a good reaction to you because they like you, But because they Dont want to be seen as rude.

See, its very easy to ignore somebody through the internet, but its emotionally (and physically) harder to do It face to face. 

I don't have much experience dating - got into an on and off again relationship in my 20's for ten years... but... when I would date, or get messages, I tend to reply to them less online/text - not because I am trying to be rude but just because I'm not in the right place for that stuff and never felt in the right place except for that guy because he was familiar to me. 
Could be how other girls feel, too, either not the right time, right setting, or they just aren't attracted.  Attraction is hard, I never realized how hard it is.  (That's what she said.)

I have my mental red flag list that I run through if I need to... so I will be polite, but at the same time, I have gotten into bad relationships, so my scanner is quite active for those flags in other people whereas it might not have been had the relationship been a healthy one - and it was on him, he gave me trust issues.

But when it is face to face I will tend to say yes out of a fawn response, which isn't a good thing, because people can't pick up on it I sound so sincere - it's better just to say no and be upfront.

I'll bet there are a lot of reasons for why things don't work out and that it has less to do with anything that has to do with you personally, so don't take it to heart.  Us girls are finicky, nervous sometimes.  Or we want to be nice and don't want to hurt people's feelings - that's why I mention my responses because they wouldn't generally have to do with the man; but my own psychology, and I think a lot of people will have a lot of reasons for why they do what they do and it isn't personal.

Many women don't reject because it's personal, usually, they will often have good reasons for it.

[Leo Gura]

Of course, but the mistake is counting women being nice to you. Nice doesn't matter. What you should be counting is how many of them get attracted to you or reach hook point and willing to play along with sexualized conversation.

Being nice don't mean shit. Of course most people will play nice just to be polite. It's not even a function of fear, it's a function of social norms.

[Javfly33]

21 hours ago, Loba said:

I don't have much experience dating - got into an on and off again relationship in my 20's for ten years... but... when I would date, or get messages, I tend to reply to them less online/text - not because I am trying to be rude but just because I'm not in the right place for that stuff and never felt in the right place except for that guy because he was familiar to me. 
Could be how other girls feel, too, either not the right time, right setting, or they just aren't attracted.  Attraction is hard, I never realized how hard it is.  (That's what she said.)

I have my mental red flag list that I run through if I need to... so I will be polite, but at the same time, I have gotten into bad relationships, so my scanner is quite active for those flags in other people whereas it might not have been had the relationship been a healthy one - and it was on him, he gave me trust issues.

But when it is face to face I will tend to say yes out of a fawn response, which isn't a good thing, because people can't pick up on it I sound so sincere - it's better just to say no and be upfront.

I'll bet there are a lot of reasons for why things don't work out and that it has less to do with anything that has to do with you personally, so don't take it to heart.  Us girls are finicky, nervous sometimes.  Or we want to be nice and don't want to hurt people's feelings - that's why I mention my responses because they wouldn't generally have to do with the man; but my own psychology, and I think a lot of people will have a lot of reasons for why they do what they do and it isn't personal.

Many women don't reject because it's personal, usually, they will often have good reasons for it.

Thanks, your message helped me a lot!

 

17 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Of course, but the mistake is counting women being nice to you. Nice doesn't matter. What you should be counting is how many of them get attracted to you or reach hook point and willing to play along with sexualized conversation.

Being nice don't mean shit. Of course most people will play nice just to be polite. It's not even a function of fear, it's a function of social norms.

Right! So I guess women replying way less online it´s because they don´t have to follow those social norms of playing nice as in real life. Make sense.