How can I avoid evil if I am evil myself?

[berry]

I've been stuck for a while in a loop of petty problems that I created for myself.

Vernon Howard's teachings (namely on the topic of evil/devilry) are enlightening me out of them today.

It's so liberating to be called out on my own bullshit I feel like I am finally breathing.

Basically I've been loving creating these problems because I've been loving the idea that I'm trying to solve them because that gave me a sense of existence.
What's more, I've been searching the root cause of the problems for so long but I've been even better at hiding them. While feeling good about myself about the search.

It's so ridiculous that it's actually hilarious.

However, regarding Howard's teachings, there are a few things I am not quite making sense out of.

Why would I avoid evil if I am evil myself? 
How can I call out people's devilry or even my own if I am evil myself?
Will I really get rid of evil, is that the purpose of life? But then if I have unconditional love towards it why would I want to do that.

And if I have unconditional love and acceptance towards evil then why do I even make its existence a thing. 

I'll probably get answers on my own just by posting this but any input is welcome.

Thanks!

[PepperBlossoms]

We like feeling self righteous, good, right, correct.

We say we hate murder and so we observe bugs rather than kill them even though they too are a murderer.

We wash our hands and murder the bacteria with soap.

Everything murders/transforms everything.

We don't like murder because we don't want to get murdered and we also cherish and appreciate things that we don't want to see them go.  We feel horrible when we hurt others feelings as we want to be considered good and we see the pain we have created for both them and us.

We can't avoid murder.  Sure we can feel whatever about it.  But if we don't murder the fruit/vegetable, we will murder our body by letting it die.

We don't want to kill the tree but we also don't want to die outside so we build a home and destroy the tree.

We don't want to kill the bugs in our home but we will go kill thousands of bugs and trees and habitat with a new site development.

We want to make life as harmonious as possible for everyone so that we can enjoy it while we are here and limit the pain for everyone but am totally willing to inflict pain if that means avoiding self pain.