Why do I always have mental block when talking?

[hyruga]

Like after I finish a sentence or two, I will run out of words to say. I actually prepared some notes and memorized them.

But when it's time to make the speech, I tend to forget quite a significant amount of notes.

It will take me a long time to recollect some of the notes. I want to give speeches without looking at notes so much. How do I overcome this mental block?

[itachi uchiha]

Research some books on public speaking.there is one on my to do list .you are the message by roger ailes

[Gregory1]

Are you speaking about casual talking? Or is it about speaking in front of an audience?

[Preety_India]

Just  practice using small short paragraphs at first and then gradually improve from there. 

Edited December 5, 2021 by Preety_India

[hyruga]

8 minutes ago, Gregory1 said:

Are you speaking about casual talking? Or is it about speaking in front of an audience?

Both actually.

I used to be really good in spelling and dictation in school. Also have no problem remembering math formulas in school. But when it comes to giving speech for public speaking or talking to friends, I will forget my words.

Edited December 5, 2021 by hyruga

[r0ckyreed]

I have the opposite problem. I know what words to say, but sometimes I cannot utter them and have to find synonyms that I can say more easily.

Its weird. I can say the words fine now, but the presence of others seem to be different.

What helped me was to contemplate was courage really is and why it’s important. I realized that courage is action despite fear. Batman reminded me that fear is good. It is not about eliminating your fears, it is about using them to fuel your growth. That’s what courage is all about.

[hyruga]

5 minutes ago, r0ckyreed said:

I have the opposite problem. I know what words to say, but sometimes I cannot utter them and have to find synonyms that I can say more easily.

Its weird. I can say the words fine now, but the presence of others seem to be different.

What helped me was to contemplate was courage really is and why it’s important. I realized that courage is action despite fear. Batman reminded me that fear is good. It is not about eliminating your fears, it is about using them to fuel your growth. That’s what courage is all about.

Okay thanks. Being courageous is very important. It also makes you spontaneous.

I suppose being joyful helps as well as being passionate and wanting to provide value.

[ValiantSalvatore]

@hyruga This might be a weird unstructural thing to do, yet practice talking to yourself. For instance I tend to explain to myself everything and there is no real time to think about what you say when you do that. Or just writting endless gibberish having to make sense is not the point you can sort of rely on intuition and just write or speak. Without having the need to be logical and make sense. Who cares? You can also have fun especially when you are alone infront of the computer or smth. similar. 

For instance I read about a concept and I talk about what I intuit is and is not correct and it sort of balances it out. When talking casually you can also ask questions or find the things that connects. Instead of getting lost in it all. 

Also massive journaling does help self-expression from a survival non-contemplative level of experience. Also, letting go of perfection there is only virtue.

Edited December 5, 2021 by ValiantSalvatore

[hyruga]

@itachi uchiha good point. Thanks for the book recommendation.

@Preety_India Alright but my aim is to talk without looking at notes. I think I can squeeze 3-5 paragraphs in one speech. If I squeeze more, I will tend to forget parts of what I want to say.

@r0ckyreed Yeah. Use fear to fuel your growth. Courage is action in spite of the fear! Thanks for all your pointers

@ValiantSalvatore Great points. TAlking to self is something I do. The second point about Talking about what works and what doesn't and then ask questions or find ways for them to connect. It sorts of reminds me of writing essay back in school time when I have to write the pros and cons of a concept, then end off with a proper stand and conclusion.

The last point about journalling to cultivate self expression is important too. I dislike writing as a kid and now it's biting back at me. I have to write more to improve my language and expression.

 

[ValiantSalvatore]

@hyruga Dude man I had no idea how to express myself I wrote fking volumes of journals handwritten. It flows naturally if you can put in an hour and do some sort of practice I did shadow work and just sheer self-expression in my journals it works sort of digesting my nervous energy through writing. 

If you live in a larger city you could do toasmasters and prepare some sort of presentation and present it untill you are satisfied with the result of the presentation. For me journaling helped with self-expression especially internally expressing myself than externally and finding words for my internal stirrings. It's way better then it used to be people legit enjoy listening to me now. Which is good.

It's a craft. 

Edited December 5, 2021 by ValiantSalvatore

[Raze]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LKAvQYCKhhM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kq5z-u7oqwQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OhR3VSMHo2w

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wLlUsWdg0G8

[hyruga]

@ValiantSalvatore Thanks for your feedback. Looks like I need to get on the journaling bandwagon.

@Raze Thanks for the videos!

[ValiantSalvatore]

@hyruga A camera or recording yourself can also work Leo in his new video has one part where he explains what to research if this is about game and talk about this then. IIRC current pop-culture, there was more. I am taking notes on this sooner or later.

From David DeAngelo books everything including violence, history for e.g is good. Not politics.

[Leo Gura]

On 12/5/2021 at 5:41 AM, hyruga said:

But when it comes to giving speech for public speaking or talking to friends, I will forget my words.

Your mistake is trying to memorize lines or pre-plan your speech. This micro-management of speech counter-intuitively makes you stifled. Speech needs to be fluid and intuitive, not premeditated. The solution is to learn to trust your intuition and let go of control to the point where you can speak without even thinking.

Logic and thinking actually fucks up your speech. Logic is too slow of a process to allow for fluid speech. Before you speak, turn off your mind. Like an athlete you must perform from an effortless flow state. The more you try to plan your words, the worse you will speak because you're creating a self-interference pattern -- like overthinking how to peddle a bicycle will make you a worse cyclist.

Rather than memorizing things line by line, focus on understanding deeply the few key points you want to make, and then delegate the word choice to your subconscious mind and intuition.

[hyruga]

On 12/6/2021 at 9:06 PM, Leo Gura said:

Your mistake is trying to memorizing lines or pre-plan your speech. This micro-management of speech counter-intuitively makes you stifled. Speech needs to be fluid and intuitive, not premeditated. The solution is to learn to trust your intuition and let go of control to the point where you can speak without even thinking.

Logic and thinking actually fucks up your speech. Logic is too slow of a process to allow for fluid speech. Before you speak, turn off your mind. Like an athlete you must perform from an effortless flow state. The more you try to plan your words, the worse you will speak because you're creating a self-interference pattern -- like overthinking how to peddle a bicycle will make you a worse cyclist.

Rather than memorizing things line by line, focus on understanding deeply the few key points you want to make, and then delegate the word choice to your subconscious mind and intuition.

@Leo Gura Wow this is it! I tend to be always thinking logically! Sometimes I forget about what's even the topic I am talking about. Yes I need to trust my intuition and let go of control. Thank you!

@Valiant Thanks for your idea.

Prior to reading both replies, I actually did a short video. But I was in my head and a lot of things went wrong. Body language was wrong and I did not even close off the subject.

 

 

Edited December 7, 2021 by hyruga

[ValiantSalvatore]

@hyruga Looks good. Keep pumping that basal ganglia .