Can you move up Maslow's Hierachy if you don't have sex?

[Frosty97]

18 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Those Zen monks got low testosterone. If they had a high sex drive they could not be monks.

So if you have high T, be careful trying to act like a monk. It will not work. A lot of monks are rather effeminate men.

@Leo Gura How do you know if you have high sex drive or high testosterone as a man?

Edited November 29, 2021 by Frosty97
grammar correction

[Jacob Morres]

I remember teal Swan talking about love and connection being as important as physiological needs sometimes (while referencing maslows) 

 

[something_else]

 

Quote

pursue her, chase her, treat her right, make her fall in love with you by figuring out how she likes to be treated

This advice sounds good but in practice as a guy it unfortunately doesn't get you very far. It tends to come across as super needy to the girl which repels her. Not all girls, but many. So it becomes a poor strategy for guys

[Shin]

4 hours ago, Frosty97 said:

@Leo Gura How do you know if you have high sex drive or high testosterone as a man?

You talk to other male friend ^^

[bloomer]

@Jennjenn

8 hours ago, Jennjenn said:

Choose one woman who you feel might like you and chase her

8 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Never chase a woman you like.

Lol get absolutely shut down. No explanation needed.

Joking. I think Leo's point is that when you chase women they're repelled by your desperation. The more you like a woman the less likely she is to like you. It's really the case of the hungry don't get fed. A woman has to come to you like a cat. You can't be chasing her. 

 

Edited November 29, 2021 by bloomer

[bloomer]

@Jacob Morres

3 hours ago, Jacob Morres said:

I remember teal Swan talking about love and connection being as important as physiological needs sometimes (while referencing maslows) 

I've never watched any Teal Swan but she keeps getting mentioned so I'll check her out. But it's obviously not a physiological need but a psychological need that causes great pain if you don't get it met. 

Quote

A tramp, therefore, is a celibate from the moment when he takes to the road. He is absolutely without hope of getting a wife, a mistress, or any kind of woman except — very rarely, when he can raise a few shillings — a prostitute.

It is obvious what the results of this must be: homosexuality, for instance, and occasional rape cases. But deeper than these there is the degradation worked in a man who knows that he is not even considered fit for marriage. The sexual impulse, not to put it any higher, is a fundamental impulse, and starvation of it can be almost as demoralizing as physical hunger. The evil of poverty is not so much that it makes a man suffer as that it rots him physically and spiritually. And there can be no doubt that sexual starvation contributes to this rotting process. Cut off from the whole race of women, a tramp feels himself degraded to the rank of a cripple or a lunatic. No humiliation could do more damage to a man’s self-respect. - George Orwell

 

[Jennjenn]

52 minutes ago, something_else said:

 

This advice sounds good but in practice as a guy it unfortunately doesn't get you very far. It tends to come across as super needy to the girl which repels her. Not all girls, but many. So it becomes a poor strategy for guys

 

25 minutes ago, bloomer said:

Lol get absolutely shut down. No explanation needed.

Guys nooo. I think Leo said don’t chase someone YOU like, so choose someone you don’t like that much. Guys…chasing works! Believe me!! I’ve never been with a guy who hasn’t chase me. I’m kinda of an introvert so I don’t chase guys and I take my time to decide if I want to hang out with someone, so every single one of them, including my ex-husband, chased after me, with flowers, jewelry, affection and attention. 
That’s just your fear of rejection talking. Do you know that dating activates the flight or fight response just like hunting did. But MEN have HUNTERS DNA remember??!!! So do it afraid and go for it.
 

She’s going to say no, of course, because that’s what chasing means, you wait and plan another strategy until she says yes. If she liked you a little bit at the beginning and by you keep showing up, her feeling will grow and she will eventually say yes. 
 

To keep the smell of neediness and desperation at bay, Chase at least 3 women at once. At the end you Keep the one who eventually says yes and drop the other ones. This is important because you don’t want to cheat and then being caught and having to start the process all over again, and the point here is for you to have sex constantly with a woman who loves you and keep that oxytocin flowing.

 

[bloomer]

@Jennjenn

15 minutes ago, Jennjenn said:

Guys nooo. I think Leo said don’t chase someone YOU like, so choose someone you don’t like that much. Guys…chasing works! Believe me!

Why would it work for someone you’re not interested in but not work for someone you are interested in?

@Leo Gura

What did you mean? Is it okay to chase women you’re not interested in?

[Danioover9000]

@bloomer

22 hours ago, bloomer said:

Well not really just sex, but love. Alternative title "Can you move up Maslow's Hierachy if you're not loved?" My minds become obsessed with sex, love, finding a woman and a sense of connection. If I don't get that does that mean I can't self actualize? Read someone that trying to skip steps on Maslow's Hierachy is what breeds mental illness. Am I just stuck in the bottoms purgatory if I can't find a woman? Also sex is occasionally listed as a physiological need on some of the pyramids I've seen, why is this? 

   You can do with little sex involved.

[bloomer]

@Jennjenn

20 minutes ago, Jennjenn said:

She’s going to say no, of course, because that’s what chasing means, you wait and plan another strategy until she says yes

This is a recipe for being seen as a creep and if you step on the wrong woman’s toes a criminal lol. It’s easy for women when they’re sat on their ass having men shower them with attention and affection. But once a woman says no to me I take her at her word lol.

[Jennjenn]

@bloomer it doesn’t have to be creepy. You treat her like a princess not like a piece of meat. She needs to feel safe in your presence. Read “the art of seduction”

Edited November 29, 2021 by Jennjenn

[bloomer]

@Jennjenn

12 minutes ago, Jennjenn said:

it doesn’t have to be creepy. You treat her like a princess not like a piece of meat. She needs to feel safe in your presence. Read “the art of seduction”

It's creepy the moment a woman says it is regardless of what you're actually doing.

I will read the art of seduction though because I like Robert Greene.

[Jennjenn]

27 minutes ago, bloomer said:

@Jennjenn

It's creepy the moment a woman says it is regardless of what you're actually doing.

I will read the art of seduction though because I like Robert Greene.

Well you’re not wrong. If a woman finds you creepy definitely move on and find another one who likes you a little bit and is more receptive of your advances. You want the one that says “ohhh thank you so much for this candy, it is my favorite”… not the one that says “eww” lol

 

this is the scenario: you bring her the candy, she’s receptive of it, says thank you, she talks to you, you guys are enjoying each other’s company, she’s seems happy and comfortable in your presence, she’s even laughing at your dumb jokes lol… then you ask her -do you want to go out on Saturday? And she says - ohh I don’t know, I have things to do, blah blah. That’s a woman you can keep chasing. 

Edited November 29, 2021 by Jennjenn

[bloomer]

@Jennjenn

27 minutes ago, Jennjenn said:

Well you’re not wrong. If a woman finds you creepy definitely move on and find another one who likes you a little bit and is more receptive of your advances. You want the one that says “ohhh thank you so much for this candy, it is my favorite”… not the one that says “eww” lol

Thing is I don't want to be turned into the candy boy where I keep buying a girl candy, she keeps saying thanks meanwhile she'd never date me and keeps telling me no. At best I'm just hoping for a crumb, a teeny tiny bit of reciprocation from her, just the chance to even date her lol. Most likely will be kept like a good doggy with pats on the head for bringing her candy or at worst (which is more likely than at best) will be seen as a creep for pursuing her and buying her more candy even when shes said no.

Point is pursuing a woman whose already said no to me seems dangerous, waste of time and debasing. But it's easy as a woman to tell the good doggies to keep doing it cause you keep getting your candy and are at liberty to go ewwww whenever you get sick of it.

Edited November 29, 2021 by bloomer

[Jennjenn]

@bloomer i get it. It’s not easy to be a man. The Amount of rejection can be brutal out there ?

I added something to my previous post, I don’t know if you read it. 
 

but I get what you’re saying. 

Edited November 29, 2021 by Jennjenn

[something_else]

1 hour ago, Jennjenn said:

chased after me, with flowers, jewelry, affection and attention

If this works for you then you are the exception not the rule. For 95%+ of girls, especially younger girls, chasing with money, showering with attention etc. just simply doesn't work. It's the nice guy strategy. Pretty much every guy has tried this and realised it doesn't typically work

[Jennjenn]

10 minutes ago, something_else said:

If this works for you then you are the exception not the rule. For 95%+ of girls, especially younger girls, chasing with money, showering with attention etc. just simply doesn't work. It's the nice guy strategy. Pretty much every guy has tried this and realised it doesn't typically work

I 100% love man chasing after me. I fall in love with them. I married one and had a kid with him. But also I’m a very feminine woman. 

[Leo Gura]

@Jennjenn You love men chasing after you who you are already attracted to.

[Jacob Morres]

8 hours ago, Jennjenn said:

including my ex-husband, chased after me, with flowers, jewelry, affection and attention. 

!! Lol. This is a death sentence lol. Guys usually do this when they have no game no offense ?

Not to discredit them completely bcuz they are probably great in a healthy relationship 

 

Edited November 29, 2021 by Jacob Morres

[Jennjenn]

2 hours ago, Jacob Morres said:

Not to discredit them completely bcuz they are probably great in a healthy relationship 

They are. That’s how healthy women choose healthy men.