30 y/o 7/10 gal pal invites me to her pad

[Emotionalmosquito]

TLDR at the bottom

I got invited over to watch some films from her vhs collection and play vidya via a phone call she made to reschedule a bonfire. This wouldn’t be the first time I’ve been over there but it would be my first time over to chill at this level, at least in a long time. We’ve also been planning a day where we get coffee then go to the park so I can teach her a one on one self defense lesson (I have no combat training, just doing it for fun) then wrap things up with movies at her place. But this last invitation I received placed all the emphasis solely on the last part. Almost as if we hadn’t been planning the other things.

Some details: She was my brother’s friend’s girlfriend many years back and I used to buy weed from her and we started smoking together which was detrimental to me because she was able to smoke heavily while I struggled to form coherent sentences after a couple hits. Weed always exacerbates my autism twenty fold so I’m effectively crippled socially when I indulge. We’ve talked about sex before and she wasn’t totally turned off by the idea but she kept saying it’s not something you can logically plan. (If that’s true then how do married couples schedule it into their busy lives?) I once texted her and said “I only need one thing from you and it starts with an S and ends with an X. After she responded, I said “Subscribe to Felix.”  You know, from the subscribe to pewdiepie meme era. After that punch line I don’t remember exactly but she said something like, “I thought you were about to be brave.” Then I said back “I was just kidding I know you would deny me because we’re just friends.” She responded, “I’m not sure I would deny you, I’ve always really liked you.” So that happened.

We have bonded over activities such as nature walks, bonfires, movie nights, that sorta stuff. And we have tripped together. Another cool thing is she knows the people who run the bar I was unjustly  banned from (look through my post history if you care enough to know more on that) so she said she would try and pull some strings for me. If this date ends up happening, I need to know how to not sperg out and screw everything up. Do’s and don’ts from wise and experienced  players are greatly appreciated.

In short, I’ve been invited over for a chill night with a long time gal pal and I really need to make sure I don’t spill my spaghetti when it happens. I need to know how to escalate and what to do if my advances are not well received. 

Thx

[bloomer]

@Emotionalmosquito

Look I’m probably not the best person to give advice lol. But this threads been here for 12 hours with no replies so I may as well give a stab at it and if you don’t like my advice don’t do it.

Now I may be retarded. But if I’m invited to a girls place, with just her, in the evening/night, to watch a movie. Even I couldn’t fuck it up. You’ve already won.

12 hours ago, Emotionalmosquito said:

I once texted her and said “I only need one thing from you and it starts with an S and ends with an X. After she responded, I said “Subscribe to Felix.”  You know, from the subscribe to pewdiepie meme era. After that punch line I don’t remember exactly but she said something like, “I thought you were about to be brave.” Then I said back “I was just kidding I know you would deny me because we’re just friends.” She responded, “I’m not sure I would deny you, I’ve always really liked you.” So that happened.

Just she have to say to your face, yes I will fuck you lol. That could have been a dodge on her part but your flirting was very direct. Then even with you saying “I knew you’d deny me “ which is just sad and probably seen as pathetic she still says plain as day that she’d sleep with you.

12 hours ago, Emotionalmosquito said:

If this date ends up happening, I need to know how to not sperg out and screw everything up. Do’s and don’ts from wise and experienced  players are greatly appreciated.

I really don’t know how you can screw this up. She already knows you, she’s already comfortable with you and she’s said that she’d sleep with you. I don’t know what more she could do to make this easier for you lol.

When you go just stay calm, and with escalation just keeping going unless she says no.

You should be fine.

[museumoftrees]

In this instance, the best way to fuck this up is to not escalate. Go for the kiss and go for sex. Don't just kiss her, give her the whole experience, sleep with her. At least try to. The only reason why you should not sleep with her is if she doesn't want to. A girl inviting you to her place is pretty rare and that's as direct as it'll ever get with women. It would be really hard for you to screw this up. Just make a move, don't worry about being smooth or waiting for the perfect moment.

[Nahm]

On 11/24/2021 at 10:09 PM, Emotionalmosquito said:

(If that’s true then how do married couples schedule it into their busy lives?)

We don’t have to think about it at all either, we just do it. 

With her… No more Felix Pewpew nonsense. No more kidding. No more self defamation. No more justifying these to yourself either. 

Daily meditation stands to be the game changer. Deeper relaxation than you’re a acustomed to. Less thinking. Less reactivity. Less justifying. The effortless way. 

From what you’ve shared, you don’t need to think about how to escalate, or what to do if and when. Just listen to what she’s saying. No additional thinking needed. 

[Emotionalmosquito]

12 hours ago, bloomer said:

if I’m invited to a girls place, with just her, in the evening/night, to watch a movie. Even I couldn’t fuck it up. You’ve already won.

So it would seem. However it’s very likely if I try anything she’ll be like “We don’t vibe that way” or gently push me away. If that happens there will be a very awkward elephant in the room for the rest of the time because anything else we talk about will be an obvious attempt at distracting ourselves from what just happened. And I may not be invited back.

13 hours ago, bloomer said:

I really don’t know how you can screw this up. She already knows you, she’s already comfortable with you and (she’s said that she’d sleep with you.) I don’t know what more she could do to make this easier for you lol.

When you go just stay calm, and with escalation just keeping going unless she says no.

Actually she has never outright told me she would. She’s only open to the possibility of it. This is the kind of girl who would tell me no as a shit test. Very hard to read, as most girls are.

[Raptorsin7]

@Emotionalmosquito If you're worried about premature ejaculation make it a point to prioritize her pleasure.

Give her a massage, go down on her etc. And then after a sufficient amount of time you can focus on your own pleasure. Worst case you cum early, but she probably won't even mind because you spent so much time just focusing on her.

[Emotionalmosquito]

53 minutes ago, Raptorsin7 said:

If you're worried about premature ejaculation make it a point to prioritize her pleasure.

With a strong pc muscle, I’m sure that won’t be an issue.

53 minutes ago, Raptorsin7 said:

Give her a massage, go down on her etc. And then after a sufficient amount of time you can focus on your own pleasure. Worst case you cum early, but she probably won't even mind because you spent so much time just focusing on her.

Love it. But before any of that is possible I first need to confirm it’s on.

btw, congratulations on being post number 77,777 on this sub forum. Nice get. Meme magic is on my side.

@museumoftrees That sounds easy enough in theory but in practice not so much. My main worry is not knowing how to recover if my advances aren’t taken well

1 hour ago, Nahm said:

We don’t have to think about it at all either, we just do it. 

And in order to just do it, you first need to figure out when you’ll both be home, if the the kids are gone or in bed, if your moods are synchronized etc. And that’s the way I tried to book a session with her. It failed because she said it has to happen spontaneously, among other reasons. The foundations have to be laid out before anything can happen successfully. Much in the same way you need set and setting to be in place before a trip.

Edited November 26, 2021 by Emotionalmosquito

[Nahm]

@Emotionalmosquito

I understand your perspective there, and you can entertain mine or not, but I’m tellin ya it isn’t something we have to think about or plan. You either. Me & her (your friend) kinda saying the same thing my man, and kinda wanting the same thing for you. Receiving mode is like, a real thing. Loa is, a real thing. You’re attracting, and then thinkin - instead of allowing & receiving, what you’re attracting.