What do women find attractive in men?

[Vivaldo]

15 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

 

26 minutes ago, soos_mite_ah said:

 

 

6 minutes ago, soos_mite_ah said:

@Vivaldo And that's the difference between what men think women find attractive vs what women actually find attractive 

I also meant to say thor on the previous post lol. Got my Chris' mixed up 

So u are advocating that size doesn't matter? 

And why are U saying Loki >> Thor ? Didn't get the joke

Edited November 22, 2021 by Vivaldo

[soos_mite_ah]

1 minute ago, Vivaldo said:

So u are advocating that size doesn't matter? 

And why are U saying Loki >> Thor ? Didn't get the joke

It's a common joke among women since Loki has more female fans because of how his character is written but men still want to insist that women find thor more attractive because muscles even though that isn't the case. 

Also, as far as size not mattering, we aren't going to know your dick size before sleeping with you unless you try to brag about how big your dick is. If you're one of those guys, we'll just assume that it's small, physically and spiritually. 

[JJfromSwitzerland]

15 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Female attraction basically boils down to status and power within the tribe.

All the other signals are proxies for tribal position.

If you have zero social standing, you get laid the least.

What about lesbians, what are they attracted to?

[zazen]

Question for the ladies: If a guy develops himself into a great person with a good balance of bad boy / boyfriend caring traits etc and goes through the dating process ie sleeping with someone a few times to figure out if they like each other or share the same values etc over time only to get end it once he finds some red flags. Isn't that leaving a lot of collateral damage behind? Do women get hung up on the 'one' that got away causing baggage or them to not be happy in their future relationships or is this something guys shouldn't worry about too much? Empaths want to date but also don't want to hurt feelings going through a lot of dating to eventually find someone they connect with long term. 

 

@Random witch 

''And yes defiantly I can sleep with a man without developing deep emotions and expecting from him to be my future husband for 30 years.

And many times I think about doing sex for the sake of doing sex and I don't think or care about what's next.''

 

Wondering how true this is for majority of women.. Can people be compatible sexually only and not in other ways. Won't sex eventually lead to emotions and a bond where you want something more. Men are told the opposite of this and maybe its only a smaller percentage of women?

Edited November 22, 2021 by zazen

[Shin]

8 minutes ago, JJfromSwitzerland said:

What about lesbians, what are they attracted to?

There is a difference between being masculine and feminine, and between being sexually attracted to a woman or a man body.

People think there is no difference and conflate the two, don't make that mistake.

[Danioover9000]

@Vivaldo

21 hours ago, Vivaldo said:

I want to know what exactly women find attractive in men...... 

Is it the physique, face, height or more non superficial things like how well they are groomed, their hygiene, verbal skills, confidence?

Or the size of the man part?

Which are the few aspects women would compromise on?

   An emotionally grounded, full of life force energy, mentally strong man, with balanced masculine/feminine energies.

[StarStruck]

Girls like masculine energy. I won't go into detail what that entails but what girls want is very selfish. I had a hard time accepting that although my requirements of the opposite side is equally selfish. I discovered that we want the polar opposites of what we are + we are looking for the opposite sex to heal our trauma's in a conscious or subconscious way. This also counts for girls: they want masculine energy + somebody who can scratch their traumatic itch. There are actually ways of finding out if a girl has a traumatic past (most do) and you can cater to that.

[Loba]

@Vivaldo A bit taller than me, so I am 5'6", so 5'9" and above would suit me the best, but it is just a preference and not a rule.  I have dated shorter guys, too.

 

[Loba]

@flyingwhalee He doesn't have to be super "high value", just someone into spiritual stuff.  The other stuff is a bonus, but a lot of guys like spiritual work and my preferences are moldable, changeable.  I am currently not looking at the moment, I have to get my own shit together first, but just gave a list of what I would find the most attractive if I were.  My preferences are pretty lenient, though, I find a lot of things attractive in different guys and don't really have a set type. 

One thing that I really like is creativity, as a creative, I like to sit in that mutual space with other creatives and not talk a lot, but just sort of "flow", enjoy the space of flow mutually.

I do like masculine energy, though.  I'm on the more feminine side, not so much in how I appear, but my orientation, how I interact with the world.  But I have gotten along well with more feminine guys, too, and even had a crush on a man who was transitioning into a woman and had more feminine energy to them.

It really... you have to just be in a person's presence for a time and just see if it clicks.  I find so many different things attractive in people, it's so hard to decide and pinpoint one thing.

Edited November 22, 2021 by Loba

[StarStruck]

1 minute ago, Loba said:

@flyingwhalee He doesn't have to be super "high value", just someone into spiritual stuff.  The other stuff is a bonus, but a lot of guys like spiritual work and my preferences are moldable, changeable.  I am currently not looking at the moment, I have to get my own shit together first, but just gave a list of what I would find the most attractive if I were.  My preferences are pretty lenient, though, I find a lot of things attractive in different guys and don't really have a set type.

You got angry when I used that word and now you use it yourself hahaah.

[Loba]

@StarStruck Yes because I am talking about myself and not molding another person.  I can change my preferences, or they just automatically do, in order to find a very wide range of people attractive - the words are used in different contexts.

I would not want someone molding me, as my soul has it's own path and trajectory, if I need to change something within myself, I will ask and go from there.  But if someone had an idea of what they were trying to change me into, then that would not work out because I'm very individualistic.

I think change, or molding should come from within the person themselves and not from an outside source unless the person is open to it and still has the full freedom to be who they are.  Like, a space where two individuals can meet and come to grow together, rather than like, the power dynamic of one person having to tend to the personality stricture of another person with a set goal in mind.

That's where I took grievance, because young girls need to be able to do this.  They can't just mold themselves into what their partners want, they have to mold themselves into what they want to be for themselves.  If there is a set space to work on such things, for both parties, that is different.

Just my 2c.  I should have been less reactive with your posts, because it is possible that you meant it in that way and just didn't have the words for it.

Many times younger girls do not understand this and they lose themselves before they have fully grown into relationships.  This can be a big problem, and it set their maturity back as opposed to finding themselves with a partner from a mutually respectful place.  My ex had more of the top down sort of mentality and I lost myself and so I am very cautious for red flags and try to tend to young women so they do not have to go through the same work that I am having to do at this age, instead of my early 20's.

Edited November 22, 2021 by Loba

[Random witch]

 

37 minutes ago, soos_mite_ah said:

Also, as far as size not mattering, we aren't going to know your dick size before sleeping with you unless you try to brag about how big your dick is. If you're one of those guys, we'll just assume that it's small, physically and spiritually. 

Yeah

[soos_mite_ah]

24 minutes ago, Shin said:

34 minutes ago, JJfromSwitzerland said:

What about lesbians, what are they attracted to?

There is a difference between being masculine and feminine, and between being sexually attracted to a woman or a man body.

People think there is no difference and conflate the two, don't make that mistake.

I think this pretty much sums up how heteronormative and limited yalls explanation of human behavior and attraction is especially on this forum. 

[Vivaldo]

1 hour ago, soos_mite_ah said:

 

@soos_mite_ah ok its a weird problem I am facing on the forum... Don't mind the other quotations. I am not able to remove em.

Ok I get you when u said that women wouldn't sleep with men knowing What their size is. But when it comes to bed does size actually matter to pleasure the woman? 

1 hour ago, soos_mite_ah said:

It's a common joke among women since Loki has more female fans because of how his character is written but men still want to insist that women find thor more attractive because muscles even though that isn't the case. 

Also, as far as size not mattering, we aren't going to know your dick size before sleeping with you unless you try to brag about how big your dick is. If you're one of those guys, we'll just assume that it's small, physically and spiritually. 

1 hour ago, soos_mite_ah said:

 

16 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

 

1 hour ago, soos_mite_ah said:

 

Edited November 22, 2021 by Vivaldo

[Random witch]

32 minutes ago, zazen said:

 

@Random witch 

''And yes defiantly I can sleep with a man without developing deep emotions and expecting from him to be my future husband for 30 years.

And many times I think about doing sex for the sake of doing sex and I don't think or care about what's next.''

 

Wondering how true this is for majority of women.. Can people be compatible sexually only and not in other ways. Won't sex eventually lead to emotions and a bond where you want something more. Men are told the opposite of this and maybe its only a smaller percentage of women?

I don't know if it's true for all women in all their life stages, but there's a common assumption that every woman who sleep's with a man get attached and needy as a lost puppy because this is how her body works or something, that's bullshit, sorry, but it's not true for all women. Don't forget how women are socialize, to hide and ignore their sexual needs, being afraid of being seen as "slut", too many partners for women it's a shame in our society and better for her to stick to one in order to save her reputation (If she cares about it). Yes, emotional attachments does exist but it's not the reality of 100% of women after they're doing sex. It also depends on many factors like the age of the women, how confident she is etc. If she's insecure she would be more easily attached to any guy she sleeps with, out of neediness. Insecure guys have the same behavior with women.

 

[soos_mite_ah]

1 minute ago, Vivaldo said:

@soos_mite_ah ok its a weird problem I am facing on the forum... Don't mind the other quotations. I am not able to remove em.

Ok I get you when u said that women wouldn't sleep with men knowing their size. But when it comes to bed does size actually matter to pleasure the woman? 

As long as you can make her cum a few times, I think you'll be good. And you don't even need a dick to do that much less a large one. 

Also, I never said that women wouldn't sleep with men knowing their size. I was saying that women won't sleep with men who act like their dick size is part of their personality and that it's something they need to insert into a conversation., 

[Vivaldo]

51 minutes ago, Random witch said:

I don't know if it's true for all women in all their life stages, but there's a common assumption that every woman who sleep's with a man get attached and needy as a lost puppy because this is how her body works or something, that's bullshit, sorry, but it's not true for all women. Don't forget how women are socialize, to hide and ignore their sexual needs, being afraid of being seen as "slut", too many partners for women it's a shame in our society and better for her to stick to one in order to save her reputation (If she cares about it). Yes, emotional attachments does exist but it's not the reality of 100% of women after they're doing sex. It also depends on many factors like the age of the women, how confident she is etc. If she's insecure she would be more easily attached to any guy she sleeps with, out of neediness. Insecure guys have the same behavior with women.

 

Yes I don't even understand why slut shaming is even a thing! Women are are allowed to be as promiscuous as they want and no one to stop them. 

It again boils down to the simple principle of "live and let live". 

One is free to be monogamous, polygamous or polyamorous or whatever they want!

Edited November 22, 2021 by Vivaldo

[Jacob Morres]

If become a bad boy What do I gain from it? Is there any benefits to being a bad boy besides attracting women?

I ask because for example, if you advocate for being nice I see a lot of benefits. Like being empathetic and kind makes people feel heard & safe, respectively

Edited November 22, 2021 by Jacob Morres

[Vivaldo]

2 minutes ago, Jacob Morres said:

If become a bad boy What do I gain from it? Is there any benefits to being a bad boy besides attracting women?

I ask because for example, if you advocate for being nice I see a lot of benefits. Like being empathetic and kind makes people feel heard & safe, respectively

You must bring the best of both worlds. The good characteristics from the bad boy attitude and from the nice guy att.

There is no formula, you gotta figure it out on your own.

 

[PurpleTree]

2 hours ago, Vivaldo said:

I think a better example would be Hemsworth or RDJ

i can't really go for hemsworth or rdj so i'm trying more the depp route

kind of confused artist staring into space, you know what i mean