Online Dating - Convincing matches for dates

[ValiantSalvatore]

Hey there I sort of want to make a results post with this online dating stuff I had to redo the challenge because I stopped it after 12 days or so and I am now in day 4. 

So, far I've matched with 24 girls in 3 months+ and I had only 2 dates. Tomorrow I'll have my third date also virtual. One date was in person. Do you guys have any videos or ressources of how to convince women more consistenly. I've sended gifs and attempted to be humerous and this worked with the 2 dates I'd had it was really odd, I was making all of the mistakes asking to early for a number and they were willing to go out. I don't really know why I was very authentic with one women and that lead to a date I continue to be authentic and this works just sending memes and gifs and asking directly for stuff to create tension. 

What else worked for you? I only dated 2 girls out of the 24 women I've matched. I deleted one girl and 2 girls deleted me. Additionally the ocassionaly weird stuff. IIRC. There are some more questions, yet for now I am just gathering data and learn about online dating / meeting women. I am using okCupid as a plattform. 

Most my conversations revolve around their interests and what fascinates the women I ask for a virtual date after 2-3 messages. The ones who have never done it seem the most interested so far. Some prefer to meet in person, in the course I've did apparently the women flew over to this guys house etc. So, if any of you guys for instance made a women drive an hour to meet a man whom she is interested in I'd really like to know how'd you worked that magic. My profile currently is not that good and it takes a lot of effort also in my opinion.

TLDR: What worked for you when you convinced matches to meet? Where did you meet? 

Edited November 5, 2021 by ValiantSalvatore

[Leo Gura]

You CANNOT convince women to sleep with you. It will never work.

Online game is all about your pictures. Nothing you write or say matters.

Stop doing online game and start doing real-life game. That's where you can run serious game.

[ValiantSalvatore]

@Leo Gura God, I payed for this course now I'll see what I can do the course gives completely different advice about messages. Also, said mixing it with socializing I'll do some game, after I upgraded my wardrobe. Asked a friend already. God, you are literally going to kill me. 

Watch me land a gf tomorrow I'd laugh at the irony.

[Leo Gura]

@ValiantSalvatore You can land a gf from online, but it's gonna hinge on your pics.

Online it doesn't really matter what you write as long as you're not creepy or needy.

You're never going to convince a girl to fuck you with clever text messages. She has to want to fuck you first based off your pics.

[Nos7algiK]

Being interesting and receptive to conversation is one of the foundations to attracting someone online. Don't allow Leo to tell you nothing you say or write matters, that is just flat out incorrect. The idea here is to be fun enough that she sticks around, but mysterious enough that she fills in her own blanks of who you are. You become the fantasy because your social game is on point. Emotions and words alone are enough to induce sexual attraction. Though, I'm sure if someone was just hideous that idea could be wiped away. 

People's insecurities are parts that are missing inside of them are not found within the looks of a potential partner. But, rather what emotions they can bring to the table to fill these voids. If you can emotionally fill in their blanks they will see themselves in you. If they see themselves in you, well you can see yourself in them...if you know what I mean lol.

But, seriously women are not as shallow to only be attracted to a picture. There are people like this, sure but to completely disregard this aspect of attraction because you only believe in physical attraction is just silly.

You can easily convince a girl to have sex with you with just clever words, but you'd have to be that clever to do so. Generally speaking it requires some type of social engineering and being very aware of your own self to be aware others.

Even with that being said if you can just be your genuine self without the need to have someone find you attractive. Someone will naturally find that attractive and women, more so than men, tend to find this authentic quality sexually attractive.

[ValiantSalvatore]

@Leo Gura I already applied your advice in advance and took pictures with a professional. I then filtered the pictures with female friends I have. Eban Pagan also mentioned he first got into dating through online daiting unsure he says it for marketing purposes or not, the online course I am doing is from him. But, yes I miss some more fun and adventurous pictures for instance with a group of friends at a table and travel/vacation pictures or something that shows intelligence, confidence, adventure etc. I have one stupid picture with a cat which was also recommended.

Also, to put the top pictures infront obviously.  I am considering buying a camera, since many people like my pictures etc. I receive compliments for my pictures that I take usually. Just to shoot some solid ones at a vaction etc. Also, if I find any pictures with a group of women for instance that is good if they are casual ! According to the course. I can also impress her via insta that way. To display artistry, taste and presenting my world. Without having to do that in person sort of. I'd have way way more matches in a larger city 140k people live here and the area is quiet large by land for Germany. 

This is also the stuff that I am working on in the 90 day challenge for the course. I am technically receiving results in advance. Which is good, yet I can be quiet impatient. 

@Nos7algiK Yes, I agree the point is I don't have a 10/10 picture collage which would made a girl fuck me, the only women in the course talked mostly about the pictures one more introverted and sensitive guy talked about how the pictures do not matter as much mind this course was released in 2005. So, it's very old I am really testing principels here that are timeless also with okCupid. I'd really have to learn that I am very direct and this has sort of worked in the past. Yet, I never gamed. I will make a female profile and see which guys standout also to see what works as messages and which messages are generic nowadays. My meme game etc. Is not very good and my instant messaging also not. I mostly create tension via imagination I presume and taking my time to reply, because I am busy it's also important to communicate that. I mostly bust a women when she only has one picture for how lame and disinteresting she is and this gave me a couple of matches which is good and ask he if she is not more interesting etc.

The ideas mentioned by you are very good and I am still contemplating how to implement adventure/myterious/normal person (human) with some bad boy elements. Via text and pictures so there is an overall theme. For instance when I move I can stick with the principles and learned how to attract girls online. 

Also, for instance I update my profile and text as well as add something new and take it out of the profile apparently this places you ontop of the algorithm for matches.  

The issue is my instant messaging game I am not instantly witty, I have my days, yet I offend people a lot like a shit ton based ony my viewpoints with spiral dynamics politics how stuff is constructed etc. So, I don't know if you have some advice for instant messaging when she is online I am all ears!
 

Edited November 6, 2021 by ValiantSalvatore

[Leo Gura]

5 hours ago, Nos7algiK said:

You can easily convince a girl to have sex with you with just clever words

Lol

[Illusory Self]

10 hours ago, ValiantSalvatore said:

Hey there I sort of want to make a results post with this online dating stuff I had to redo the challenge because I stopped it after 12 days or so and I am now in day 4. 

So, far I've matched with 24 girls in 3 months+ and I had only 2 dates. Tomorrow I'll have my third date also virtual. One date was in person. Do you guys have any videos or ressources of how to convince women more consistenly. I've sended gifs and attempted to be humerous and this worked with the 2 dates I'd had it was really odd, I was making all of the mistakes asking to early for a number and they were willing to go out. I don't really know why I was very authentic with one women and that lead to a date I continue to be authentic and this works just sending memes and gifs and asking directly for stuff to create tension. 

What else worked for you? I only dated 2 girls out of the 24 women I've matched. I deleted one girl and 2 girls deleted me. Additionally the ocassionaly weird stuff. IIRC. There are some more questions, yet for now I am just gathering data and learn about online dating / meeting women. I am using okCupid as a plattform. 

Most my conversations revolve around their interests and what fascinates the women I ask for a virtual date after 2-3 messages. The ones who have never done it seem the most interested so far. Some prefer to meet in person, in the course I've did apparently the women flew over to this guys house etc. So, if any of you guys for instance made a women drive an hour to meet a man whom she is interested in I'd really like to know how'd you worked that magic. My profile currently is not that good and it takes a lot of effort also in my opinion.

TLDR: What worked for you when you convinced matches to meet? Where did you meet?

 

 

I’d advise checking out Alex from playingwithfire, he gives the best online dating info I know. 

[Leo Gura]

5 hours ago, Medhansh said:

So, you're suggesting that only hot guys should do online dating? 

Pretty much. If you have high standards.

[ValiantSalvatore]

Don't know what happend to the forum my account exploded with matches after i added dont's. I deleted a girl on accident because I did not know what shibari is. I could have done hentai in rl. But okay.

[ValiantSalvatore]

@Illusory Self
I skimmed at a couple of videos seems very orange/blue like I've have some friends who are more like this I'll see what is applicable feels kinda inauthentic to skim content will dig a bit deeper. 

I do have some issue with this content somehow when skimming. I am not like this.

 

Edited November 8, 2021 by ValiantSalvatore

[Lyubov]

Physical features isn’t the most important part of your photos. Guys who think they look average or are slightly above can still land hot dates online as long as your photos are immaculate. They have to be immaculate though. Your average photos of you lifting weights, drinking a beer and posing in a cheap suit won’t do. 

[Nos7algiK]

1 hour ago, Justine said:

@Nos7algiK

Why would you teaxh someone it's okay to manipulate someone into bed with clever words. That's really authentic ain't it!! 

 

You dating advice sucks 

 

I never said it was ok. I'm just saying it's possible. I don't agree with doing so that's why I never commented on it more. Words are very powerful and with the right use of them you can convince many people to do a lot of things they wouldn't normally.

I just don't agree with Leo here that "nothing you say or write matters" because even if you aren't manipulating someone. Sexual attraction can still happen if someone likes who you are, specially when we are authentic. Which is what I said as well.

[ValiantSalvatore]

@Lyubov Yes, it's important to include photos which show confidence, adventure, humour as well as social proof or some part of your personality that you cherish very much. I did professional photos and I am above average looking I usually get compliments about being handsome as well as good looking etc. I am 6'3 so in the height department I am doing well. My friend who has been doing online dating for instance loves chemistry and has a picture in a lab coat which works very well etc. I just don't know posting a picture with a stack of books or me meditating would also be good if I want to attract that kind of women as well as this is my authentic interest. Strong and confident body language is also important I just did not research that when I went to the professional photographer and overall they are rather weak for the price I've paid even with a discount because I know her.

Also the thread got derailed. I've written to a friend he gave me good advice to send her my number so she has no pressue of adding me and one girl added me right away, because she stopped replying since people are busy. 

The dating coaches in the course hired professional photographers for their clients and gave some examples the course was in my opinion healthy Orange/Green/ medicore yellow more authentic advice without lying, cheating and manipulating etc. More personality pictures the suit worked very well in a professional shooting displays a lot of confidence with the right body language. Some people can just rock a suit and be authentic and playful. It's more about being a high quality guy with character and a life and displaying that uniquely. 

Worst pictures are topless etc. The point for me is just applying all of this stuff. The giving my number when she once responded and now is not responding etc. worked for one girl. Becoming a more well-rounded person as well as romantically compatible etc. is the overall value I aim to generate as a human being. 







 

[Vzdoh]

I am on a few online dating apps and the reasons I swipe right and go on a date

- good looking dude

- pics are fresh

- pics show social life with friends

- pics show hobbies and cheerful personality 

- texts to me are not generic, but show interest in me

- texts flirty and fun

- the guy invites me out for drinks or coffee

Hope this helps

[ValiantSalvatore]

@Vzdoh Thanks! This is good and honest advice I did not try inviting for drinks and coffee. As well as the pics with social life and cheerful personality or hobbies I know that they are important, yet I miss those. 

 

Edited November 9, 2021 by ValiantSalvatore

[Leo Gura]

Inviting for drinks or coffee only works if she finds the guy highly attractive. It's pointless to invite a girl who isn't into you.

If you got the looks and your pics are good, you don't need any special message game. You can literally just message her, "Hi cutie" and she will eagerly reply back. On the other hand, if your looks are not up to par, you can message her with the most clever and custom-tailored stuff, and she will ignore you.

[ValiantSalvatore]

@Leo Gura I can see the point and I'll remember that. When she replies back it basically means there is some level of interest or not? I can see the stressor with the pictures, unfortunatly this has to wait now I asked a friend he will be taking new pictures with me pretty soon. I'll most likely buy a camera on black friday etc.

I checked the day game link for a wingmen the nearest city seems to be 1h30 away which is still somewhat okay. I will text more friends for going out and test test some stuff from a book I bought that seems quiet good, when I am out. 

Another with the issue of convincing.

For instance one girl liked me she writtes me a super long text after I tested some stuff and I asked her smth. that was in major disagreement with my profile. She replies and stops replying after my next reply and I usually ask for a date/number 3-4 messages in exchange.

This is sort of what I mean with convincing some seem to be lazy and just want to chat and the attention it's almost impossible to initiate a date with these women. 

3 months into dating so still quiet new. 

[Leo Gura]

3 hours ago, ValiantSalvatore said:

This is sort of what I mean with convincing some seem to be lazy and just want to chat and the attention it's almost impossible to initiate a date with these women. 

Yes, some girls will waste your time chatting but they have no intention of fucking you.

If she is genuinely attracted she will agree to a date after a few messages. Don't waste time with elaborate text game.

[ValiantSalvatore]

@Leo Gura That is good to know for the great filter. Thank you for feedback and advice!