What is the minimal that girls demand from guys?

[Raptorsin7]

17 minutes ago, StarStruck said:

I'm already doing that and I'm not getting the results I like.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x82ElPyM9Fw

[Shin]

By asking "what is the minimum to get "x"", you're asking "what is the average kind of life that I can have ?"

Average life sucks balls, don't aim that low you can do better

[Leo Gura]

2 hours ago, StarStruck said:

I'm already doing that and I'm not getting the results I like.

Work on being more fun and chill, and approaching more..

2 hours ago, StarStruck said:

I would add to that: somebody they can trust and be themselves with sexually.

She will automatically trust whoever is fun and chill.

[Lyubov]

Like Leo said, don't overthink it. Girls love sex and many are open to exciting sexual experiences with men if given an opportunity that feels right. A synergy of being fun, chill, safe, manly, etc. Use any other synonyms you like. That's about it. 

[StarStruck]

8 hours ago, Lyubov said:

Like Leo said, don't overthink it. Girls love sex and many are open to exciting sexual experiences with men if given an opportunity that feels right. A synergy of being fun, chill, safe, manly, etc. Use any other synonyms you like. That's about it. 

I know a guy, he is fun and chill, and other than that he has nothing to offer: he has a low paying job, not educated and looks are OK but not great. It is really annoying, frustrating and madning really. All these years I thought I had to be perfect. I still think I need to be perfect, like speak perfectly, be educated, be this and that. It is really not important. That guy that I'm talking about has a highly educated gf, cheats on her, she knows that and she still puts up with him.

I need to make more friends so I don't need to reinvent the wheel because I'm just dumb struck with how stupid girls are. The only thing they care about is vibes.

9 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Work on being more fun and chill, and approaching more..

She will automatically trust whoever is fun and chill.

Ok.

Edited November 3, 2021 by StarStruck

[Shin]

9 minutes ago, StarStruck said:

The only thing they care about is vibes.

And the only thing you care about is ass, boobs and pretty face

 

[StarStruck]

3 minutes ago, Shin said:

And the only thing you care about is ass, boobs and pretty face

 

Not at all.

[Lyubov]

1 hour ago, StarStruck said:

I know a guy, he is fun and chill, and other than that he has nothing to offer: he has a low paying job, not educated and looks are OK but not great. It is really annoying, frustrating and maddening really. All these years I thought I had to be perfect. I still think I need to be perfect, like speak perfectly, be educated, be this and that. It is really not important. That guy that I'm talking about has a highly educated gf, cheats on her, she knows that and she still puts up with him.

I need to make more friends so I don't need to reinvent the wheel because I'm just dumb struck with how stupid girls are. The only thing they care about is vibes.

Ok.

I've slept with girls on the first night just because I was interesting/fun, chill, whatever. They had the opportunity for a new and exciting sexual experience and I was there so it happened. To be honest I was far less developed and attractive than I am now. I really don't think it's helpful to compare yourself to other guys like this. Just focus on yourself and enjoying the process. Some of these girls got a boyfriend later at some time and I'm sure some of them didn't give it right away on the first night to them. I did some pretty graphic dry humping in our undies with my gf, some finger stuff over panties, etc. It was very sexual and tantamount to foreplay before sex. It bothers me a little looking back that my gf didn't go all the way with me the weekend we met but the next weekend. She just had laser hair removal so I can understand that being one of the factors. The other being she was afraid I would look at her as a slut and just treat it as a ONS or FWB. The point I'm trying to make is women just go by how they are feeling and you can't control another person's feelings. It hurts sometimes to accept this and know the solution to getting these needs met isn't necessarily a cognitive one but one where you have to let go of a lot of thinking and your ego insecurities and just let your emotions guide you. Giving up that wanting to control will really free up a lot of energy for you to just flow and feel masculine and fun and relaxed and connect with women. That is enough to get laid if you are in the right setting and don't live with your parents

 Just focus on relaxing and having fun in these social settings like parties, bars, clubs, cool streets at night, on dates, etc and you will find yourself getting laid regularly. Sometimes it will come quickly sometimes it will come after a couple dates but it will come. Let go of beliefs that trigger these angry emotions in you and appreciate how volatile and beautiful the nature of women is. It doesn't always make senses and it doesn't have to. That's why women are so amazing, it's nice for things to not make sense sometimes and just sail across to the bedroom on that beautiful ocean of emotion women bring to the interaction. You are one piece of the puzzle and she is the other. Just focus on playing your role and having fun and you will find other pieces that will want to fit with you.  

Edited November 3, 2021 by Lyubov

[something_else]

4 hours ago, StarStruck said:

I need to make more friends so I don't need to reinvent the wheel because I'm just dumb struck with how stupid girls are. The only thing they care about is vibes.

Most girls prioritise emotional stimulation and vibes in the same way most guys prioritise looks. Just how it is. I'd actually argue men are the stupider ones there. They'll stay with the most vicious and manipulative girls just cos they're beautiful

3 hours ago, StarStruck said:

Not at all.

You're lying if you say looks aren't somewhere near the top of your priority list. Because if they weren't then dating would not be that hard for you

Edited November 3, 2021 by something_else

[Chew211]

16 hours ago, StarStruck said:

Tell me what that is so I can do it.

This attitude might be your issue.

[Gili Trawangan]

By trying to cater to women's expectations, you're already putting them on a pedestal and shooting yourself in the foot.

The mindset is that I am the way I am and I love myself. Some women will like me and others won't. I will like some women and not others. It's all good.

[Shin]

12 minutes ago, Gili Trawangan said:

By trying to cater to people's expectations, you're already putting them on a pedestal and shooting yourself in the foot.

The mindset is that I am the way I am and I love myself. Some people will like me and others won't. I will like some people and not others. It's all good.

Fixed it for you

[Gili Trawangan]

9 minutes ago, Shin said:

Fixed it for you

Yes, that is more encompassing

[StarStruck]

7 hours ago, Gili Trawangan said:

By trying to cater to women's expectations, you're already putting them on a pedestal and shooting yourself in the foot.

The mindset is that I am the way I am and I love myself. Some women will like me and others won't. I will like some women and not others. It's all good.

That is really hard to wrap my head around because currently women get repulsed when I'm truly myself, which I totally get by the way: sometimes I can be boring and in my head. 

I also can be fun and chill but those part of my personality are the candles on the pie. There are the candles and the pie. The pie itself is quite bland. lol. 

 

Edited November 4, 2021 by StarStruck

[Karmadhi]

@Leo Gura

On 11/3/2021 at 10:26 AM, Leo Gura said:

She will automatically trust whoever is fun and chill.

So girls are basically retarted, that is what you are saying. Trust is based on integrity, honesty and good will. For us guys it works like this. I am sure you are correct but it makes girls seem extremly shallow and stupid when you say it like this. No wonder guys just say: girls are so emotional and should not be given positions of power.

Edited November 4, 2021 by Karmadhi

[StarStruck]

16 hours ago, Chew211 said:

This attitude might be your issue.

 That was a joke but you are right. I'm like that sometimes. 

[Leo Gura]

1 hour ago, Karmadhi said:

@Leo Gura

So girls are basically retarted, that is what you are saying. Trust is based on integrity, honesty and good will. For us guys it works like this. I am sure you are correct but it makes girls seem extremly shallow and stupid when you say it like this.

We're talking about a very narrow context here: the context of making sexual decisions.

When it comes to deciding who to sleep with, girls are indeed basically retarded. No logic is applied whatsoever.

Then again, it's not like guys are geniuses in this domain either.

When you see a hot girl, you don't give a fuck about her integrity or honesty.

[StarStruck]

I've tried this vibe:

 

You can only pull this off if you have the confidence, self-expression and personality.

In my opinion it is like this: the pie is confidence, the candles are funniness, chillness, silliness, and so on.

If you can pull this vibe, your success rate will be very high (I've only approached 2 girls and both were a hit). Girls love this vibe. But the thing is you can pull such a stunt like Russel Brand: eventually she will be bored because you can't keep up with being a dancing clown.

Edited November 4, 2021 by StarStruck

[Leo Gura]

@StarStruck You should not try to mirror Brand. You need to find your own authentic natural style, which will probably be much more chill and laid-back.

Chill style can be very effective. You don't have to be zany and high-energy.

[Gili Trawangan]

14 hours ago, StarStruck said:

That is really hard to wrap my head around because currently women get repulsed when I'm truly myself, which I totally get by the way: sometimes I can be boring and in my head. 

I also can be fun and chill but those part of my personality are the candles on the pie. There are the candles and the pie. The pie itself is quite bland. lol. 

 

First of all, it's not that women get repulsed. It's that some women are not attracted to you. That's fine. Self-judgment doesn't help either... a lot of that is a story in your head.

Second, and most importantly, to wrap your head around this you need to embrace the paradox of personal development: you are perfect the way you are AND there's always room for improvement. So you love yourself as you are right now, at all times, and you also improve on any so-called imperfections that you feel are holding you back.