Why Are PUA's Creepy?

[Karmadhi]

Guys can we all stop with this bullshit nice guy, bad boy discussion between guys and girls. It is really getting old! I have been on this forum for over 1 year now and i see this discussion every few threads between the two genders. I admit it, i have also taken part on it but now i realize each side thinks what they think and that's it. Nothing will change.

How about we make the rest of the thread here about how guys can be less creepy?!

[Derek White]

38 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

Where did I state that women are attracted to niceness? It seems to me that you've got an inaccurate representation about the way I think.

11 hours ago, Etherial Cat said:

The reason why women love Russel is because he treats them well.

 

39 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

So perhaps next time directly address the answer given to the question, instead of quoting the question like it was never answered.

To give some context, I've been talking about Russel as per his current version. As I said earlier, he is married and has settled down. 

There are plethora of videos on his channel where you can see Russel's character and his view on sexuality. 

Therefore, assuming he treats woman right is far from being outlandish.

Ummm... you can't tell how someone treats women by their Youtube persona. That's assumption. 

[Etherial Cat]

34 minutes ago, Derek White said:

 

Ummm... you can't tell how someone treats women by their Youtube persona. That's assumption. 

So the fact he's married, and post video like this isn't enough to presume he's no longer into womanizing in your opinion?

What you seem to miss is that assuming this is not enough proof is also based on an assumption you're making about his character. 

--

Treating well ≠ niceness.

Women are definitely attracted to men who treat them well. There is nothing to say there.

If you disagree with the statement above, it means you believe women are attracted to men who treat them poorly and that's absolutely false.

Niceness on the other hand means an excessive, spineless behavior. So the two concepts aren't describing the same reality.

Women are attracted to men who are both respectful of themselves and others. A man who is falling in the niceness spectrum lacks spine and often has poor boundaries. Which is why it looks unattractive.

Edited November 4, 2021 by Etherial Cat

[zazen]

Russell brand isn't creepy because he's attractive, physically and non physically. Most men trying to emulate/act that way would get rape whistled at as it signals to the woman a man with weak genes is trying to reproduce, abort abort! Men have to be attractive, not act it.

Attractiveness to women is essentially strength in its forms (physical, emotional, mental, spiritual). Strength on these levels translates to the traits : Appearance/Animality, Assured/Assertive, Attentive/Abundant, Aliveness.  These 7 traits also are in  line with the 7 chakras. These are traits in your control, because of these traits you will gain value from things outside of your control such as social proof, status, wealth etc. These traits are who an attractive person is, not what they have outside of themselves or what their attractiveness translates to / gets them externally, although the external achievements can re-inforce those traits.

Physical / Root/Sacral chakra: Appearance (looks/good genes,protective strength) and Animality (in touch with sexuality/primal) this is what causes you to flirt, lets her know this is a man speaking to a woman.

Emotional / solar plexus/heart chakra: Assuredness (of your self worth, value, life and that of others giving rise to compassion, can be an emotional rock for the woman, your not emotionally weak or unavailable but emotionally resilient and hold space for her emotional storms) and Assertive (trust in your ability to act rather than be acted upon by life, you ACTtualise your vision, purpose, potential through ACTion). 

Mental / throat/third eye chakra: Attentive (towards her, social calibration, you have value but she has to have access to that value, if not caring of her needs with your attentiveness towards them theres no security for the woman) and Abundant (in your vision/view of life and what it has to offer). Rational (attentive) optimist (abundant). Attentive towards life and truth, yet optimistic / abundant for you see beauty inherit in life despite its suffering, and see life for what it could be. Rationality devoid human emotion/vision/spirit is nihilistic. Optimism devoid rationality is destructive. 

Spiritual / crown chakra: Aliveness (in touch with the spirit that animates life, become full of life/energy others want to bask in, playful, share loving energy, compassionate as you realise the essence in you is shared by the essence in others) 

 

The nice guy vs jerk debate

Nice defined ; from Old French, from Latin nescius ‘ignorant’, from nescire ‘not know’.  Be good, not nice or a jerk. Those are both extremes. What is the nice guy ignorant of : of himself, being in touch with himself or his true nature of which there is the lower and the higher, the animal and the divine, the beast and the bhudda. When you lack integrating your nature, you don't know who you are, what you want and have no boundaries against things that go against who you are and what you want. Women essentially seek strength, great strength comes from integration within ourselves. Jerks are in touch only with their animal self (their balls), however they still signal strength on a primal level which is why they get the girls and why girls end up in bad relationships as their bodies instinctually/emotionally react to these guys. Nice guys are too in their mind and cutting themselves off from their lower nature and so no primal strength is there, only intellectual strength. The good guy is in touch and integrated with all, the balls the head and the heart and so signals the most strength.  Women don't like the guy to be the jerk, they like the strength and power that comes with it. You can show strength and power in a healthy manner. Don't be nice, don't be ignorant, become aware of your true self and embody yourself in all dimensions. 

Edited November 4, 2021 by zazen