Why Are PUA's Creepy?

[Leo Gura]

22 minutes ago, TK2021 said:

But yes you are a creepy car salesman if you mass approach randoms

Make whatever excuses you want, but in the end women will flee from you and flock to guys who go out and develop their game.

[Waves]

24 minutes ago, TK2021 said:

you should have more organic ways of socializing. Ideally you don't have to learn to socialize by bothering thousands of people

Absolutely agree with this, but it's also the case that the skill you learn by cold approaching and the stronger man you become in the process of learning that skill complements and improves your chances in those more organic ways of socializing.

It looks like an artificial training ground, but you're basically learning to be proactive, act despite your fears and excuses, make a good first impression and connect with a stranger in a deeper way, a stranger that could be a girl you find attractive, a potential friend or business partner.

Also, on the point of "bothering": I still have that mindset to some degree, but what are you actually doing when you chat up a stranger? You break them out of their mundane bubble for a couple of seconds, minutes at most. You're creating a little space for a potential connection to happen. If you mumble something embarrassing, you'll feel a bit cringey and they're going to forget it 1 min later. If you tell them a genuine compliment, you "risk" lighting up their day , and you feel good. That's already a win, not to mention better outcomes than that one.

[gettoefl]

4 minutes ago, Waves said:

Absolutely agree with this, but it's also the case that the skill you learn by cold approaching and the stronger man you become in the process of learning that skill complements and improves your chances in those more organic ways of socializing.

It looks like an artificial training ground, but you're basically learning to be proactive, act despite your fears and excuses, make a good first impression and connect with a stranger in a deeper way, a stranger that could be a girl you find attractive, a potential friend or business partner.

Also, on the point of "bothering": I still have that mindset to some degree, but what are you actually doing when you chat up a stranger? You break them out of their mundane bubble for a couple of seconds, minutes at most. You're creating a little space for a potential connection to happen. If you mumble something embarrassing, you'll feel a bit cringey and they're going to forget it 1 min later. If you tell them a genuine compliment, you "risk" lighting up their day , and you feel good. That's already a win, not to mention better outcomes than that one.

you can't complement a stranger sincerely, that is an empty gesture, you know nothing about them, how could you?

you are merely probing their insecurity to see how quick you can get in their pants nothing more

she needs no random telling her she looks good

[Raptorsin7]

53 minutes ago, mandyjw said:

Why do people overeat? 

Because they are reacting to emotional triggers

[Lyubov]

1 hour ago, Leo Gura said:

You'll probably never reach that level of game, but you can still get laid 100s of times.

If you had Russell's level of game and good logistics you would be pulling every night.

Life purpose and self esteem / self love is incredibly important when it comes to becoming as charismatic and desirable (or as close to) as Russell Brand. You can tell he loves what he does in this world and is very much accepting of himself. He is on a mission. He genuinely relishes in giving through his charisma and is detached in the most healthy sense. You can see how embodied it is. No amount of technical practice will lead to this. This is something that will only come with great inner changes and will take a lot of work if one's foundation is heavily off. 

[Leo Gura]

16 minutes ago, gettoefl said:

you can't complement a stranger sincerely, that is an empty gesture, you know nothing about them, how could you?

Compliments are rarely necessary or even used.

The most I will compliment a girl I just met is "you are sexy" or "you are cute" or "you are adorable". That's it. And these phrases are used to establish sexual intent.

As the conversation deepens, compliments can be made on things you genuinely like about her personality or lifestyle. This is genuine.

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you are merely probing their insecurity to see how quick you can get in their pants nothing more

No, you are building a new connection with a human from scratch. Ideally the girl is not insecure. You're not hunting for insecure girls to prey on. You're hunting for the highest quality girl you can find, but physically and psychologically. You're not trying to attract some poor broken girl.

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she needs no random telling her she looks good

Lots of women are genuinely flattered by a solid approach. Some women light up and it makes her day, even if she is married or has a boyfriend.

Getting approached is a huge ego boost for her. And even many beautiful women are insecure about their looks so getting complimented on that makes them feel good.

If a random girl approached you and told you that she thinks you're handsome, you would feel awesome.

Besides, attractive girls get hit on all the time. They are used to it. It's no big deal. If you don't approach her, some other guy with more balls than you will, and she will sleep with him.

13 minutes ago, Lyubov said:

Life purpose and self esteem / self love is incredibly important when it comes to becoming as charismatic and desirable (or as close to) as Russell Brand. You can tell he loves what he does in this world and is very much accepting of himself. He is on a mission. He genuinely relishes in giving through his charisma and is detached in the most healthy sense. You can see how embodied it is. No amount of technical practice will lead to this. This is something that will only come with great inner changes and will take a lot of work if one's foundation is heavily off. 

Actually, a lot of technical practice leads to exactly this.

Technical practice not only dials in your outer game, but most importantly your inner game. If you do 10,000 approaches and rigorously dial in your game you will fix the broken inner foundation along the way.

Genuinely relishing giving charisma is what game teaches you.

10,000 approaches will produce massive inner changes in you. You will become like a new person by the end of that.

[Waves]

@gettoefl Three points:

• Yes, a lot of pick up you see around is devilry and manipulation. But rest assured that there are healthier and more conscious ways to do it: being a connector who is sharing his (masculine) gifts, his presence, curiosity, attention, playfulness, sexual energy manifested through his intent in a calibrated way (yes, girls like to feel desired and sexy), etc. Have a look at these guys: The Natural Lifestyles
• I would introspect and observe what comes up when you think about the idea of a sexually liberated woman. It's a useful pointer to your own insecurities. If you manage to see through those strong reactive emotions and go to the source of that trigger you're in for some fat growth my friend. A hint: where you feel fear is where you need to look and shine light on.
• If you observe how a person moves and walks, their facial expression, their choice of clothes, the energy in their eyes, you'll be surprised how many things you can derive about them, and how you can feel different just by letting yourself be affected by them and getting into their world for a second. The key here is curiosity. You're finding out how she's like as a person, how she's uniquely beautiful. And oh yeah, women absolutely need to be reminded of the beauties that they are. Of course a compliment best comes from a place of non-neediness, otherwise it has the opposite effect. And you can simply open with what you observe about her, like "You have such confidence in your walk, ..."

Edited November 3, 2021 by Waves

[Etherial Cat]

6 minutes ago, Lyubov said:

Life purpose and self esteem / self love is incredibly important when it comes to becoming as charismatic and desirable (or as close to) as Russell Brand. You can tell he loves what he does in this world and is very much accepting of himself. He is on a mission. He genuinely relishes in giving through his charisma and is detached in the most healthy sense. You can see how embodied it is. No amount of technical practice will lead to this. This is something that will only come with great inner changes and will take a lot of work if one's foundation is heavily off. 

The reason why women love Russel is because he treats them well.

If he'd have the wish to get laid 100s of time for the sake of sex his energy would be different. Having sex with 100s of women is purposeless and boring.

It seems like the behavior of someone who is relentlessly searching for something and doesn't find any solace from one night to the other. That's a behavior typically coming from lost, bereft people.

 

[mandyjw]

17 minutes ago, Raptorsin7 said:

Because they are reacting to emotional triggers

Because they feel unfulfilled and seek an outside source to fill them. 

[Leo Gura]

16 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

The reason why women love Russel is because he treats them well.

How do you know he treats them well? You just assume that because he's got game.

If Russell treats women well, then players treat women well.

See... just because he's got game you give him a free pass. He could tell you that he wants to fuck your mom and your sister and you'd giggle and laugh. But in fact if he got the chance to fuck your mom and your sister he would. And then you'd only find out about it a year later. And you would probably still be attracted to him.

This is what charm allows a guy to get away with.

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If he'd have the wish to get laid 100s of time for the sake of sex his energy would be different. Having sex with 100s of women is purposeless and boring.

You don't think Russell Brand has banged 100+ girls? Lol

He is a self-admitted sex-addict. I would not be surprised if he slept with 500-1000 girls.

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It seems like the behavior of someone who is relentlessly searching for something

You can't find a girlfriend without first sleeping with her.

[Raptorsin7]

Just now, mandyjw said:

Because they feel unfulfilled and seek an outside source to fill them. 

I started taking supplements for adhd, depression, and adrenal fatigue now I feel almost 0 urge to pleasure eat. 

I am still unfulfilled and seeking, but I am no longer emotionally triggered so I eat less

[mandyjw]

@Raptorsin7 There's nothing wrong with pleasure eating. If you're actually taking pleasure in food, you would know when to stop. Over-eating is just one way that could manifest. In the case you gave of the hypothetical unattractive obese woman, she seeks to be filled and then is supposedly unattractive to men because of the way she uses to meet this need, which supposedly lowers her value and causes unworthiness of being "filed" by a man. Is this not ironic? Is this not a vicious circle of an assumption that something is wrong with me? 

If I am feeling deprived, more deprivation is not going to solve my problem of deprivation. 

[Etherial Cat]

12 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

How do you know he treats them well? You just assume that because he's got game.

Because I follow him on social media and if he'd behave like his, he'd have some serious personality split leading to functional incapacity. He's got plenty of videos on the subject, and one can just presume he's applying to his life what he preaches.

Regarding Game: Just check what he had to say about PUA in the video you listed earlier.

Russel doesn't describe his way of being with women as PUA technics or Game.

At 2mn 04 sec, he says what he thinks of it: Manipulative and tricking. Which is exactly the point as lot of us make.

12 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

You don't think Russell Brand has banged 100+ girls? Lol

He is a self-admitted sex-addict. I would not be surprised if he slept with 500+ girls.

I wouldn't be surprised if he did. Once upon a time, he was quite a different person from his own admission.

If you'd ask him about it, I'm certain he'd come close to the analysis I made before. "I used to want to fill an inner void, so I tried to dick any vagina I could find".

But I do bet his current ratio is nowhere similar to where it used to be nowadays and this is what I've been referring to.

Russel is now married and has kids. He's a totally different person.

12 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

You can't get a girlfriend without first sleeping with her.

That's probably when the relationship gets holistic enough to call it being in a relationship for most.

But you can sleep with people without getting a girlfriend as well. 

Edited November 4, 2021 by Etherial Cat

[Raptorsin7]

1 minute ago, mandyjw said:

@Raptorsin7 There's nothing wrong with pleasure eating. If you're actually taking pleasure in food, you would know when to stop. Over-eating is just one way that could manifest. In the case you gave of the hypothetical unattractive obese woman, she seeks to be filled and then is supposedly unattractive to men because of the way she uses to meet this need, which supposedly lowers her value and causes unworthiness of being "filed" by a man. Is this not ironic? Is this not a vicious circle of an assumption that something is wrong with me? 

If I am feeling deprived, more deprivation is not going to solve my problem of deprivation. 

Maybe when I get wiser I will like obese woman, who knows

[mandyjw]

@Raptorsin7 HONEY. There ain't nothin' wrong with you. You don't like obese women? Fine. Lots of men do. The story that they are unloved and unworthy is a projection. 

[Raptorsin7]

Just now, mandyjw said:

@Raptorsin7 HONEY. There ain't nothin' wrong with you. You don't like obese women? Fine. Lots of men do. The story that they are unloved and unworthy is a projection. 

I would be very surprised if lots of men found obese woman sexually desirable

[Nos7algiK]

15 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Notice that when Russell Brand does it on live TV, no one finds it creepy.

 

Russell Brand "woke up" a few years back and now has many videos talking about his sexual days. How all of that was nothing more than a reaction to his own insecurities, a desire to be liked, and to fill a void inside of him that no matter how many women he slept with it was never filled. He also talks about how in the end it not only hurt him as a person, but was hurting others as well.

Russel is no longer the guy he used to be and good for him honestly, he has a family now. I'm sure many men dreamed to be him and many women dreamed to be with him. But, he threw all of that away to find himself and find stability in life. When someone we would consider top of the game is admitting there are many issues with this behavior, then maybe it's best to turn our awareness inside and ask ourselves why are people really doing stuff like this?  Even if it is to build confidence and actually obtain self security then why do people claim their are so actualized themselves but defend this behavior like it isn't rooted in insecurities? The basic principle of desire is to believe you lack something in the first place.

Regardless if the creepiness factor is determined by how good someone is and their looks it's still predatory in nature.

Edited November 3, 2021 by Nos7algiK

[mandyjw]

@Raptorsin7 Who cares? The majority of people aren't gonna like the same car model you really like. Everyone is weird. Men liking big women is more common than you'd think. It's only hidden out of shame quite often. Then big women feel shame. Shame, shame, shame. The things we do to each other out of shame. What a shame! I know a woman who was obese and wanted to lose weight and it was an issue for her husband. He loved big woman porn and she wouldn't be that anymore. 

Russell Brand is so very, very not my type at all, that I find this entire thread somewhat hilarious. 

Attraction is not inherent in something! Are you attracting, attracted or pushing away what you don't want? 

[Raptorsin7]

2 minutes ago, mandyjw said:

@Raptorsin7 Who cares? The majority of people aren't gonna like the same car model you really like. Everyone is weird. Men liking big women is more common than you'd think. It's only hidden out of shame quite often. Then big women feel shame. Shame, shame, shame. The things we do to each other out of shame. What a shame! I know a woman who was obese and wanted to lose weight and it was an issue for her husband. He loved big woman porn and she wouldn't be that anymore. 

Russell Brand is so very, very not my type at all, that I find this entire thread somewhat hilarious. 

Attraction is not inherent in something! Are you attracting, attracted or pushing away what you don't want? 

So she stayed obese and increased her risk for disease and poor health, because her husband doesn't do inner work and has a preference for unhealthy body types?

[mandyjw]

Just now, Raptorsin7 said:

So she stayed obese and increased her risk for disease and poor health, because her husband doesn't do inner work and has a preference for unhealthy body types?

No, she lost the weight. As far as I know things were fine with her hubby. That wasn't the point though. 

See how quick you are to pounce on the judgement button? Why?