Ego backlash kicked my butt

[Terell Kirby]

I was all ego this past weekend during Halloween. Ate shitty food, drank too much and woke up feeling like hell.

This was after really good strides with meditation and contemplation..I told myself I'd take it light.

Low and behold, a few calls here and there, I was out running the streets (had fun, but I thought i'd do better lol).

How do you manage your backsliding episodes after making spiritual progress?

[StarStruck]

Get angry, and use that as emotional fuel to get up your feet.

[FlyingLotus]

32 minutes ago, Terell Kirby said:

How do you manage your backsliding episodes after making spiritual progress?

Compassion, learning and mindful suffering.  Here's a summary of Leo's episode on Ego Backlash which you may find helpful.

 

[Moksha]

The ego is so sneaky, it can creep in as self-recrimination.  It is actually my ego's favorite weapon. I've learned that Judging myself only makes the ego stronger. By all means, learn what keeps you present and what doesn't, but be kind to yourself in the process.

[Terell Kirby]

@FlyingLotus my goodness, this is sooooo helpful. Thank you !!

@Moksha Yes, I am trying to become present to my self-recrimination after backsliding. Working to be more compassionate towards my impurities each day.

[Nahm]

“Backsliding”…? 

“Ego backlash”…!?

“Mindful suffering”…!?!?

Some ideologies are ideologies. Probably all of them actually. 

[Moksha]

@Terell Kirby Great to hear! There's a French expression: reculer pour mieux sauter. It refers to taking a step back, in order to jump farther forward. Consciousness (i.e., the real you) is calling the shots, enjoy the journey 

[Byun Sean]

I usually would just let it play out. 

 

Sometimes its healthy to take a day for rest and integration. 

 

If you think you can push through if you tried and you feel motivated to push further. Go ahead. 

 

Consistency is key in this journey. You want to push yourself but not bite off more than you can chew.

 

Sometimes the most productive thing to do is to take a rest so you can come back fully recharged and ready to go again later.

 

Much like you would need a rest period from working out at the gym for your muscles to grow and recharge, the mind and nervous system works the same way whether it be with learning something or consciousness work.

In fact if you didn't take a rest here and there, you may actually miss out on important growth and insights you could have otherwise have had/ or your growth would just go slower due to burnout.

Edited November 1, 2021 by Byun Sean

[Terell Kirby]

57 minutes ago, Byun Sean said:

In fact if you didn't take a rest here and there, you may actually miss out on important growth and insights you could have otherwise have had/ or your growth would just go slower due to burnout.

Totally, it's hard to stop when you are on a roll. I often find the less breaks I take in between my insights, the more severe my ego backlash is.

[Guest Bazooka Jesus]

I know they can feel like a massive pain in the butt - but(t) ego backlash episodes humble you and prevent you from getting cocky and waltzing off into a full blown "HOLY SHIT, I AM JESUS!!" mania (yes, the irony of someone with my particular user name making such a statement does not escape me).

Well, at least that's what I like to tell myself in order to feel better whenever the good old empire strikes back, lol.

Edited November 1, 2021 by Bazooka Jesus

[FlyingLotus]

7 hours ago, Terell Kirby said:

@FlyingLotus my goodness, this is sooooo helpful. Thank you !!

You're welcome!  

Ego backlash is also my favourite time to enjoy sad, moody music.  

Or moody inspirational stuff.

 

[EntheogenTruthSeeker]

Get a mini trampoline/rebounder from Walmart for $45 and get your blood flowing/change your state after 5-10mins of effortless bouncing. 
 

Beyond helpful for moving through blockages and backlashes. I did same thing as you yesterday, and 5 mins today set me in a completely different mood. 

[Terell Kirby]

11 hours ago, EntheogenTruthSeeker said:

Get a mini trampoline/rebounder from Walmart for $45 and get your blood flowing/change your state after 5-10mins of effortless bouncing. 
 

Beyond helpful for moving through blockages and backlashes. I did same thing as you yesterday, and 5 mins today set me in a completely different mood. 

Awesome, i'll put this on my to-do list.

[EntheogenTruthSeeker]

@Terell Kirby be careful though. Have an intuition about when it is appropriate to do it. It can make processing emotions and blockages effortless 5-10mins. But, sometimes you can do it too much and produce another backlash. It’s a grey area. 
 

Like psychedelics. Sometimes they can shift your energy, but too much produces backlash. 

[LloydRidges]

Quit whipping yourself. You have been repressing the desires you expressed this past weekend.
 

Now your ego is wanting to punish itself for not living up to it’s ideal of a spiritual, contemplative person. 
 

The real root of this desire to punish is your subconscious feelings of shame and guilt. 
 

Be honest as possible with yourself about times you felt shame and guilt. Think of these scenarios and observe what different areas of your body feel like, especially stomach, chest and throat. Say and act how you wanted to back then, but held back. Dig deep.

[kamwalker]

It seems like you're painting the picture in your mind that a person who parties is doing something egotistical and the person who sits at home and meditates is not. So you're creating an ego by making an identity through meditation and contemplation. I disagree with any notion that spirituality involves withholding yourself from desires. What is really happening is that the deeper you go into spirituality the less you want to participate in those superficial acts in the first place. You still can but it just becomes secondary to other things. And when you do decide to drink and party you just enjoy it for what it is.