How to feel equal or higher value than beautiful girls

[StarStruck]

24 minutes ago, Gesundheit2 said:

I would tell her that it's a very amusing thing to me; that people are different, and that understanding differences and exploring various perspectives are my biggest passions in life (play the emotional passionate purpose-driven guy card + subtle wordplay i.e. I want to explore her). Then I would possibly recite an example or two of girls I know who said otherwise (play the pre-selected guy card + trigger her jealousy + challenge her + show her I have an independent opinion and am independent of her opinion).

But of course, it's easy for me to think these stuff right now. I rarely say the right things on the fly, but I'm getting better.

Ok. So basically demonstration of value through stories and shit. When she threw out that shit test about fuckboys I just froze up. I fucked up so hard. Also when she brought the topic of me trying to kiss her, I didn't know how to handle it, I asked her why she didn't want to kiss me like a total fool. I already knew the answer: I couldn't establish the right vibe where she would put out. 

 

Edited October 29, 2021 by StarStruck

[Shin]

2 hours ago, StarStruck said:

Ok. So basically demonstration of value through stories and shit. When she threw out that shit test about fuckboys I just froze up. I fucked up so hard. Also when she brought the topic of me trying to kiss her, I didn't know how to handle it, I asked her why she didn't want to kiss me like a total fool. I already knew the answer: I couldn't establish the right vibe where she would put out. 

 

She's like one girl out of 4 billions.

Chill down you can try again with another one, you're not gonna die

[mandyjw]

2 hours ago, Knowledge Hoarder said:

This whole idea of human beauty, is pretty weird from an outside perspective, if you think about it. I mean, at the end of the day we're all just a bunch of apes, trying to fuck.

In the 70's female apes didn't find tight bellbottoms and low V shirts on males hot, and in the 2000's the majority of males didn't find large breasts any more interesting than they ever did. 

Humans pretend that there is time, comparison, value, etc. What there is IS style, creativity and it's meant to heighten the enjoyment of sex and mating, not detract and complicate. If you think there's inherent value in beauty rather than the being of it, you've missed it. Which is exactly why Bansky sat all day as a street vendor in NYC selling his art for normal prices like any unknown artist and no one gave a shit. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Gesundheit2]

3 hours ago, StarStruck said:

Ok. So basically demonstration of value through stories and shit. When she threw out that shit test about fuckboys I just froze up. I fucked up so hard. Also when she brought the topic of me trying to kiss her, I didn't know how to handle it, I asked her why she didn't want to kiss me like a total fool. I already knew the answer: I couldn't establish the right vibe where she would put out. 

It's not like that. Not everything women say or do is a test. Sometimes they're actually just expressing themselves. Your job is to take whatever they say and turn it into a selling point for your value. But you shouldn't overdo that either, because that would make you look needy and like a tryhard. It's kind of tricky, but essentially your goal is to shift the conversation outside of the logical pragmatic frame. Once you succeed with that, you wouldn't need to sell anything anymore. The mood will be correct and the date will go smoothly. You will sense a different vibe from the girl, a more feminine and open vibe.

Throughout the date, there will be plenty of opportunities for you to sell yourself. Use them as entry points to activate that vibe. Once it's activated, simply try to maintain it by not fucking up and returning to the logical mode.

And by the way, you didn't fuck up by remaining silent. You will always have silent moments. That's okay. You don't have to comment on everything she says, there are many things that don't deserve a response, so just learn to be comfortable with silence. You only fuck up if you say something hyper logical, like trying to debunk her or something. Silence is simply like saying: okay, maybe, whatever.

[Javfly33]

7 hours ago, StarStruck said:

Ok. So basically demonstration of value through stories and shit. When she threw out that shit test about fuckboys I just froze up. I fucked up so hard. Also when she brought the topic of me trying to kiss her, I didn't know how to handle it, I asked her why she didn't want to kiss me like a total fool. I already knew the answer: I couldn't establish the right vibe where she would put out. 

 

I would have just let the issue go. 
Also regarding the kiss I think the problem is just a lack of leadership and assertiveness which stems from lack of masculine energy.

I think You are doing well. You just have to go full-throttle on to that masculine energy. 

[StarStruck]

4 hours ago, Gesundheit2 said:

It's not like that. Not everything women say or do is a test. Sometimes they're actually just expressing themselves. Your job is to take whatever they say and turn it into a selling point for your value. But you shouldn't overdo that either, because that would make you look needy and like a tryhard. It's kind of tricky, but essentially your goal is to shift the conversation outside of the logical pragmatic frame. Once you succeed with that, you wouldn't need to sell anything anymore. The mood will be correct and the date will go smoothly. You will sense a different vibe from the girl, a more feminine and open vibe.

Throughout the date, there will be plenty of opportunities for you to sell yourself. Use them as entry points to activate that vibe. Once it's activated, simply try to maintain it by not fucking up and returning to the logical mode.

And by the way, you didn't fuck up by remaining silent. You will always have silent moments. That's okay. You don't have to comment on everything she says, there are many things that don't deserve a response, so just learn to be comfortable with silence. You only fuck up if you say something hyper logical, like trying to debunk her or something. Silence is simply like saying: okay, maybe, whatever.

This really hit the nail. Tonight I went out doing night game and I was totally stuck in logical mode. As a nerd I can't just help it. From experience I know it is hard to go out of logical mode and just vibe. It is a matter of luck; sometimes I can vibe in logical mode and sometimes I can't. I couldn't find the catalyst for non logical vibing.. yet.

Edited October 29, 2021 by StarStruck

[Gesundheit2]

@StarStruck A really good and easy technique that you can implement to correct that is this:

Make empty comments about anything in your visual field. For example, you see a big shiny billboard, ask if it's a new ad or if she tried the product or whatever. Make something up. Anything, preferably the first thing that comes to your mind. You could talk about trees and make an interesting conversation. You could say this tree looks beautiful, exotic, I love how trees look like in this time of year, etc. Keep doing that so that she gets comfortable talking with you at the same level (girls seem to fear risking to look stupid if they talk like that first, so be the bold one and make the first stupid move haha), and then after a while you make the latter steps of escalation. You just gotta be talkative at the beginning. And don't expect a response. If she doesn't reciprocate, that's fine, talk about the next thing you see. The key here is that being extroverted like that should seem like your modus operandi. If she still doesn't reciprocate, then she has low interest from the get go and you can't possibly fix that. In that case, tell her that this date is boring and just drop her. But it's unlikely, since she agreed to go out with you, which means at least medium level interest, which you work on raising with your personality and swagger and all that stuff.

Edited October 30, 2021 by Gesundheit2

[Leo Gura]

On 10/29/2021 at 4:02 PM, StarStruck said:

This really hit the nail. Tonight I went out doing night game and I was totally stuck in logical mode. As a nerd I can't just help it. From experience I know it is hard to go out of logical mode and just vibe. It is a matter of luck; sometimes I can vibe in logical mode and sometimes I can't. I couldn't find the catalyst for non logical vibing.. yet.

It's not a matter of luck, it's a matter of being disciplined enough to approach a lot and build up state.

The catalyst is doing some ballsy approaches and getting some hard blow outs, and then keep going! Eventually you will enter a flow state and your verbals will become fire.

[StarStruck]

13 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

It's not a matter of luck, it's a matter of being disciplined enough to approach a lot and build up state.

The catalyst is doing some ballsy approaches and getting some hard blow outs, and then keep going! Eventually you will enter a flow state and your verbals will become fire.

Being ballsy during day game is no problem for me. Night game is a little different than day game though. Just being ballsy doesn't cut it, I approached this girl and she was interested. We are on the dance floor. She is on the dance floor. And we were just looking at each other. After a minute or so she discovered I was bullshitting and went away lol. I'm more or less new with night game so I'm not trying to be hard on myself. I will just keep trying.

On 30-10-2021 at 7:42 AM, Gesundheit2 said:

@StarStruck A really good and easy technique that you can implement to correct that is this:

Make empty comments about anything in your visual field. For example, you see a big shiny billboard, ask if it's a new ad or if she tried the product or whatever. Make something up. Anything, preferably the first thing that comes to your mind. You could talk about trees and make an interesting conversation. You could say this tree looks beautiful, exotic, I love how trees look like in this time of year, etc. Keep doing that so that she gets comfortable talking with you at the same level (girls seem to fear risking to look stupid if they talk like that first, so be the bold one and make the first stupid move haha), and then after a while you make the latter steps of escalation. You just gotta be talkative at the beginning. And don't expect a response. If she doesn't reciprocate, that's fine, talk about the next thing you see. The key here is that being extroverted like that should seem like your modus operandi. If she still doesn't reciprocate, then she has low interest from the get go and you can't possibly fix that. In that case, tell her that this date is boring and just drop her. But it's unlikely, since she agreed to go out with you, which means at least medium level interest, which you work on raising with your personality and swagger and all that stuff.

If she doesn't talk back I just keep asking questions interview mode. It is embarrassing. I stopped doing it and I just scoot off when she doesn't reciprocate but they say the guy needs to talk 80% of the time in the beginning so I need to work on that. I will try what you said about topic threading.  It is just so forced. Old guys in the park are good at doing that; I have been on the receiving end of topic threading. They can just talk and talk because they found somebody who will listen.

[Gesundheit2]

13 minutes ago, StarStruck said:

If she doesn't talk back I just keep asking questions interview mode.

Yeah, absolutely don't just keep asking questions like an interviewer. Mono-tonality is a mood-killer for everyone, especially girls.

Ideally, you want to be bouncing back and forth between asking questions and expressing your personal thoughts. That'll make the conversation easy. On the one hand, she will know that you're comfortable with who you are when she sees how you're expressing yourself fearlessly. And on the other hand, she will know that you genuinely care about knowing her when you ask her about her life.

Edited November 1, 2021 by Gesundheit2

[Karmadhi]

I will never understand the obsession people have with banging hot girls. Like honestly, how shallow are you??? I am not saying to bang girls you think are ugly but wont average or decent girls do? Why this obessesion for only hot girls? A decent looking girl is enough looks wise, then focus on other things which are also very important. Damn even an okay looking girl will be great if the other boxes are checked. 

[Javfly33]

19 hours ago, Karmadhi said:

I will never understand the obsession people have with banging hot girls. Like honestly, how shallow are you??? I am not saying to bang girls you think are ugly but wont average or decent girls do? Why this obessesion for only hot girls? A decent looking girl is enough looks wise, then focus on other things which are also very important. Damn even an okay looking girl will be great if the other boxes are checked. 

Its simple. Regarding a long term girlfriend, i agree with you and i would totally choose an average girl with a personality i match with, than a Hot Boring or low conscious Girl.

However with sex, It comes implicitly that if you get sex with this hot Girl you Will feel more masculine, validated and loved.

Of course that belief is toxic and What fuels low self esteem and all of that shit, But i am example of someone Who has It. 

[Javfly33]

Until i Dont Bang one for the first time, the belief wont dissipate unfortunately.

I tried to rationalize But i accept the Desire and just work for it. You have to Burn your illusion material desigs.

One must validate first experience that Love was not really "outside yourself" i Guess. 

[Karmadhi]

@Javfly33 Yes for one night stands i would get it. But that is not what most guys really want i think?

[Leo Gura]

On 11/1/2021 at 9:24 AM, StarStruck said:

Just being ballsy doesn't cut it, I approached this girl and she was interested. We are on the dance floor. She is on the dance floor. And we were just looking at each other. After a minute or so she discovered I was bullshitting and went away lol.

So what? Approach another 10-20 girls and you will hit state.

It doesn't matter what your approach is. It can be a horrible approach, it will still build state if you do enough of them in a row.

In fact, the horrible, cringy approaches tend to build state the best as long as you keep doing them. Because you realize a horrible approach is no big deal, and your mind relaxes.