Experiencing Infinity (LSD Trip Report)

[King Merk]

I took two tabs of LSD yesterday around noon. My intentions for the trip went as follows…

 

1. How can I be more loving?

2. Where am I biased?

3. How can I approach my relationship with my gf in as loving a way as possible. 

 

I began the trip in the bath while meditating. I was in there for roughly an hour, contemplating these questions. When the trip started to get heavy I then moved to the bed. 

I laid in bed for probably an hour going deep into my life. I felt as if I was auditing my life. I was running through my history with a fine tooth comb, looking for self bias. I found many. While I was in bed, I was playing with my physical positioning too. I was doing some GOATA groundwork and it felt fantastic. I felt very in tune with my body and the spinal engine. 

At around 2pm I wondered into the living room. I had a yoga mat in their felt called to it. I was pulled into a meditative pose where my shins were on the ground and I was folded over the top of my body, laying forehead into the ground with my arms extended backwards. I could hear a buzzing. A universal "hum" of sorts. 

I honed in on this hum and completely lost myself. I can't explain in words what happened next. I went into this infinite loop. I had 4 words playing in my head over and over and over again…

 

"All difference is imaginary" 

 

These four words LITERALLY deconstructed my entire reality. 

I lied there, crying on the ground. Crying the name of my girlfriend. Crying the name of my dog. Crying the name of all those I cared about. I cried out loud "WHO THE FUCK IS LEO!!!" And then it hit me… I chuckled. I am Leo God Dammit. I had this intense physical discomfort disappear in a flash and I merged again with the all. Lost in the eternal hum of the universe. 

I would come to back to "reality" and then dissolve again into infinity. It was a strange back and forth. A loop like sensation that I can only describe as beautifully horrifying. I didn’t know what to do. There was nothing to do. Nothing to be. Nowhere to go. 

I had the urge to grab my phone and tell my friends about what I was experiencing but then I stopped. What's the point? I'd be telling myself I thought. What's the point of any of this? I'll never be able to go back to "normal" life. Not after experiencing this. 

I saw the image of the ouroboros, a snake eating it's own tail and I read the words.

 

 IT NEVER ENDS.

 

And that was it.

It never ended.

But it did. 

 

After oscillating back and forth between the infinite and the finite for what seemed like an eternity, I was back into my normal life. I was back on solid ground. I looked at my dog and said to him, "you're my favorite imaginary". 

I sat there for hours, playing back those four words from earlier that ripped my world apart. 

 

"All difference is imaginary"

 

I could still grasp what they were saying and repeated to myself out loud,

What the fuck. What the fuck. What the fuck.  

WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPNED.

The rest of my trip was spend sitting in meditation. Reflecting and spiraling. 

I looked out into the trees from my window and could see all of the universe. I saw how they spun in this beautiful dance playing out in my mind. I saw them spiral up infinitely and spiral down infinitely. I'd see fractal zooming videos before but this was my first time experiencing it first hand with my own eyes. Like all of reality was stored inside every other piece of reality. 

How in the fuck does Leo explain this stuff so articulately? It's maddening. It's so foreign. It's the most foreign thing I've ever experienced but it's right in front of my eyes at all time. 

I'm still chewing on this experience. Still breaking down what in the hell happened there. 

I can't see it any more though. The spirals, the fractal zooming, the infinite nature of everything. I read these words "all difference is imaginary" but it feels like I'm looking at an empty shell. What exactly were these words pointing to? The Truth slipped through my hands like an eel. 

This isn't my first time having an "awakening" experience like this but it's certainly the most clear. It's like every time I come into these deep psychedelic journies I get "better" at dissolving into nothingness. Hard to explain lol. But there's certainly more to be explored here. 

It wasn't all God/Infinite stuff though. I also got plenty of personal/practical downloads from the trip. I really need to work on three key areas of my life…

1. Emotional Mastery

2. Financial Freedom

3. Nonviolent Communication 

Anyways, until next time.

Thanks for reading and safe travels.

Edited October 17, 2021 by King Merk

[BipolarGrowth]

Sounds like a great time and some deep while useful stuff. I remember having a very similar part of an awakening the first time I took LSD. I saw that same snake, and it clicked lol. Keep it up man. 

[Vincent S]

Thank you for sharing ?❤️☯️

[Adamq8]

Thanks for your report ? God is great ?

[Leo Gura]

11 hours ago, King Merk said:

I cried out loud "WHO THE FUCK IS LEO!!!" And then it hit me… I chuckled. I am Leo God Dammit.

Ahhh yeah, don't you love that part?

[Thought Art]

@Leo Gura Yeah.. The amount of... "Thank you Leo"s I have had on trips. I forgot about those... 

Thank you Leo ahahhah

[Inliytened1]

1 hour ago, Thought Art said:

@Leo Gura Yeah.. The amount of... "Thank you Leo"s I have had on trips. I forgot about those... 

Thank you Leo ahahhah

No no no...you manifested Leo and all others in order to wake yourself up as God.    You are God.  That's a powerful epiphany.

@King Merk welcome home.  Welcome to Infinity.