Planning on taking 5 MEO DMT for the first time

[Jordan]

I just wanted to make an update on some things that have seemed to change since taking 5MEO DMT this weekend.

The first thing I noticed was that the sex with my girlfriend was really even better than usual. This happened before when I was meditating a lot. 

The second thing today after rewatching Leo's video "Guided Exercise For Realizing You Are God" I am much more aware of how my reality is being constructed over top of the present moment. There are infinite ways it can be constructed over what the perceptions are presently. During the drive to work today, I was just focused on the concepts that were coming up as they came up and how they were nowhere near the truth that was experienced right here. I still needed the concepts to know where to drive and when to accelerate or brake but I could see them as ultimately an illusion and makes me think that I can build a reality however I want over top of the raw sensations. Anyways. I will keep focused on this since it is very interesting to me and see what comes of this. 

[Jordan]

I plugged 15 mg of 5-MEO DMT as measured by my scale which was 2 of the 10-15 mg scoops. I wrote my experience here shortly after my trip but it seems there was a problem with the forum and my post was deleted. This was my 3rd trip ever.
 

This time I had very little nausea which was a nice relief from the previous time. I believe this was due to lying down for the first 30-40 min. My body felt like it started to vibrate which I was getting used to from the first 2 trips. My sense of touch felt clear and very comfortable. At some points I felt like feeling up my body with my hands but most of the time I kept perfectly still. My vision seemed to blur out sharp edges but it still seemed like I was focused and seeing clearly. 
 

I asked myself what this was (referring to the present experience). I realized I did not even know what it meant to know something. It is not as simple as someone telling me and then believing it. I need to use my own awareness and intelligence to understand. I asked myself what I wanted and I had a strong desire to understand myself. I really felt like I lacked understanding of my beliefs, motivations and values. My priorities seemed to shift to awareness of my thoughts and feelings and seeing patterns in my reactions. I think in this way I can make better decisions on what I want to do with my life and how to spend my time in a way that lets me appreciate, understand and construct the reality that I want.
 

After 30-40 min of lying in my bed, I got up and took a shower. I contemplated what it meant for something to be true or real and what it meant to understand or know something compared to believing it. What would understanding how reality works mean in the present experience? 

 

In 2 weeks I plan on taking 3 scoops. I will keep doing my best to keep meditating and contemplating these questions until then.

 

Edited November 8, 2021 by Jordan

[Jordan]

I plugged 3 scoops of 5-MEO DMT today which weighed around 20-21 mg total. It was a more intense experience this time. I felt it starting to kick in in less than 1 minute. I laid down semi prone for the first 5 min or so then went onto my back when I realized I the initial bit of nauseous feeling went away.

I noticed that I was able to be very focused on sensations but it required me to give up my attention of other parts of my awareness. I could vaguely remember being human lying down but the details of my life were not present with me. That was not interesting to me. I was more focused on answering what I am, what I want. I noticed that it felt quite pleasant to lie down and enjoy the experience of existing. At some points, I could hear a loud noise like a generator that would slow down and speed up. When I focused it would slow down then when I switched my attention it would speed up. I looked at my hand for a bit and it looked like it was melting away . It sort of moved a bit like fire. I am not sure exactly how to describe it. It did not feel unpleasant though.

I remember memories of advice from different people like Sadhguru came up saying something along the lines of if you put yourself fully into something then it will become a great thing. Other advice came up but I silenced it and decided I wanted to come up with my own understanding.

Goal setting for me has usually been about material goals like make $10000 in one month in my business or "meditate everyday for 1 hour" but that might not be the best way to about living a good life. A good way to go about living a good life seems to be to figure out what I want to experience subjectively in the present moment and experiment on now to achieve that. At the same time, you will ideally fully accept the current moment as it is. Even accept the desire to change it. See the necessity for everything to be exactly as it is because it really is perfect from a big picture perspective. 

Part of experiencing things the way I want that is being able to experience deeply and not be caught up in worrying or making plans constantly. I remember thinking part of what is great about reality is discovering things for the first time that you did not know. It is interesting to me to think about all experiences as being unique and that lessons can be learned constantly from them.

I am not sure if I should take more 5-MEO DMT next time. I might take the same amount or half a scoop more and have a clearer plan on what I would like to contemplate about. 

Edited November 20, 2021 by Jordan
grammar

[bliss54]

wow really interesting, thanks for sharing

so you didnt need a trip sitter for plugging it, it went all good?

 

[Jordan]

@bliss54 Hey, thanks for reading and sharing that you appreciate me sharing my experience.

It worked fine for me without a sitter. I explained in the previous posts how much I started with and how I took it.

I have my own bathroom, bedroom and kitchen so I have a lot of privacy.  

For me it really helped starting with a low dosage. Lying down helps a lot for not being nauseous.

It seems like it is a bit hard to control my body and I really feel like staying still during most of the time and for part of it I want to squirm around so I start out semi prone sort of in the recovery position in the off chance that I throw up or something like that.

The one time I tried to sit up fairly early on, I felt sick and it was distracting.

This last trip I knew sort of what to expect and although the experience  was much more intense, the previous experience with the lower doses allowed me to feel safe. I think it could become very uncomfortable if you are afraid and struggling with what is going on.

[Jordan]

I plugged 3 scoops yesterday so around 21mg freebase in 3ml of vinegar. I planned to just experience without any goals or trying to learn anything. It was nice experience. It took me into a state where I can focus on see hear feel and let everything else start to disappear. At one point I stood up and looked back at my bed. I was so focused on what I was looking at that I realized to could be in danger of falling over if I continued diving into my visual field. I sat on my bed and wondered what I can take away from this experience. It began to think about my priorities and that I should be prioritizing the health of my physical body and my mind higher than I am now. It seemed like it is much more important to maintain my body's health than I have been showing through my actions. I meditated for 1 hour before the trip and  30 min later on that day. The 30 min several hours after the trip I was able to get into a state very similar to when I was tripping. I did not follow my normal mindfulness or satisfaction meditation. I just sat there and surrendered to experience.

I watched Leo's video today on heavy metal detox and I think this is a good idea for me to try. I will also be planning to continue daily self massage to try to heal my knee pain and meditation to improve my sensory clarity. I have been meditating an average of an hour per day for the last 2 weeks mostly doing mindfulness meditation with labeling and trying out the satisfaction meditation a bit.

[Jordan]

This has kind of started to become a journal so I started a post in the journal section instead where I will continue posting: