Javfly33

Doing drugs some times makes me contemplate about my Life.

10 posts in this topic

First of all, this is not a post encouraging the use of drugs. Once i you read my post you Will understand correctly why i said that.

Ill try to make my post as short as possible.

Currently Im working in a job Im not happy in It, 90% Im stressed due to my habilities being less than its required , and once i máster the Job, i know i Will be bored, with short periods of time of stress. Additionally, i believe the company is stage red/Orange and Im not comfortable selling my Life skills to this company for the rest of my Life. Even though its a stable job, i Dont think its a wise move to stay here for ever. The more time It passes here, the more the company has you by the balls. Why? Because the skill you gain working here you Will only be Able to do It in this company. If suddenly this company start to get worse and worse conditions for the workers, you are just fucked. You wont be Able to offer yourself to other better companies. This is the additional main reason i believe i should change careers.

However, today i took a benzo ( i had taken occasionally through this month to deal with the stress because It was a new role, my first management Role with +20 persons under my lead, and Alone in an Office there is supposed to be at least 1 manager more, if not 2) and i also i had the idea of taking too with It a microdose of Lsd.

What happened is that my experience of working there almost completely changed. The job wasnt anymore stressing, But rather stimulating, the job wasnt just meaningless and Boring, But entertaining and useful to make the customers Happy.

So What now? My whole change of career is based on my inability of my brain chemistry to produce good feeling chemicals? Im going to do a career change based on a lie? 

But its also true that almost nobody walks around on a microdose of Lsd and benzo . Like...yeah its just Brian chemistry BUT WE ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO FEEL GOOD No Matter the consecuences. Which is What drugs do. They make you realize its not so much the external consecuences But you. However since humanity is locked into a less good-feeling Brian chemistry and a more survival oriented based brain chemistry, stress happens a lot. And Boring happens too. That way you can search for more (imaginary) meaninful Jobs.

I Dont know...Im confused...

 


Fear is just a thought

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Your brain chemistry tells you when something is wrong. Trust your brain chemistry.


Intrinsic joy is revealed in the marriage of meaning and being.

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7 hours ago, Bob Seeker said:

Now your challenge will be to have that confidence and be relaxed without drugs

I Dont know if that is possible due to survival agenda of the ego. 

 

5 hours ago, Carl-Richard said:

Your brain chemistry tells you when something is wrong. Trust your brain chemistry.

Im not sure in What aspect you mean that message. ?


Fear is just a thought

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You can also contemplate life sober, tends to be more scarier...which is why we seek drugs in the first place to soften the blow.

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Dude. Be super careful with Benzos. From what I've heard, you can get addicted to them really fast, and it's supposedly one of the hardest substance habits to kick once you're hooked. They say that Benzo withdrawal makes the most nightmarish psychedelic trip seem like a walk in the park on a sunny afternoon in comparison.

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On 1/10/2021 at 1:52 PM, Knowledge Hoarder said:

You are going into a dangerous territory now. This is perfect coctail for addiction. Be carefull. You should absolutely change your career, rather than force reality to be exciting again by pumping feel-good chemicals into your brain. Life is gonna get very grim, very fast.

You havent understood me then.

Of course Im planning (Im actually quitting my job this week to study and find a job in a career i want).

I just wanted to say, sometimes you wonder, how much of the anxiety is produced by you and how much from your job.

And no, i didnt force reality to be exciting. I just had a benzo because the anxiety at the point i was was basically imparing and i wasnt even Able to get the work done.

 

 

Edited by Javfly33

Fear is just a thought

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1 hour ago, Bazooka Jesus said:

Dude. Be super careful with Benzos. From what I've heard, you can get addicted to them really fast, and it's supposedly one of the hardest substance habits to kick once you're hooked. They say that Benzo withdrawal makes the most nightmarish psychedelic trip seem like a walk in the park on a sunny afternoon in comparison.

Yeah, however i Dont plan to take benzos daily or even 

I cant get addicted to benzos easily because is the most Boring lame drug ever. There is people that find them euphoric, for those i Guess its easy to get addicted.

However in my case It was 1 month in a position super demanding so i wanted to tkae them occasionally to make the work less stressful.

But to be honest, Im quitting the job Next week, so i Guess It was kind of a waste of time. 


Fear is just a thought

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23 hours ago, Javfly33 said:

 

I cant get addicted to benzos easily because is the most Boring lame drug ever. There is people that find them euphoric, for those i Guess its easy to get addicted.

 

no people don't get addicted to benzos because it makes them feel euphoric

it's just a very good anxiolytic and people prone to stress and anxiety enjoy that feeling of not being anxious

but your body gets addicted really fast to benzos and then you have a huge problem

i'm not against benzos btw. i like them but not more often then like once every two weeks or so

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