Understanding When I Am Ready To Be In A Relationship

[Frogfucius]

@Taavi You still have no point, no goal. What do you even want? You want for me to say I'm wrong about everything, and you're right? Are you trying to make me realize something you think is true in your mind? That's actually pretty funny. At least I'm honest and admit I'm doing this for shits and giggles. I know you ain't gonna change your mind about   anything, because you're a fool.

Go get high off your own farts, ya goob.

[Taavi]

@Frogfucius I´m sorry I have offended you.

[Frogfucius]

@Taavi You're the one that keeps coming after me with your wonky ass theories and projections, homeslice. Don't start what ya can't finish. Now tell me what it is you want.

[Taavi]

@Frogfucius I pointed out what I considered as signs of low self-esteem in the posts you have been making. That is what I wanted to do and I did it. What else is there for me to say?

[Frogfucius]

@Taavi You bring up one post from months ago, from a dark point in my life, and somehow think you're preaching gospel on my current self-esteem level. I've woken the fuck up since then. You on the other hand, are completely lost and clueless. But continue to think you're backing me into some kind of corner, because I put down your fantasies about life and ideals. That will prove something to yourself!

One day you'll wake up like I have.

Edited December 13, 2016 by Frogfucius

[Taavi]

@Frogfucius You are currently trying to prove your worth to a complete stranger on the internet. What else do you want for a sign of low self-esteem?

Ps. Self-Esteem does not change that rapidly in months. Read the book, you will get a better idea about it.

[Frogfucius]

@Taavi There's nothing to prove on my side. You're trying to prove something on your side because I completely shit on your ideals. Your ideals are stupid and are not grounded in reality. That's the only reason you bring up a post from months ago on me. Again: I have woken up. I don't care about your book, and your fantasies about life are beyond idiotic. One day you'll wake up to how stupid you've been, believing in myth. And you think you've got what it takes to be a sage? Ha! I take shits more enlightened than you.

[Taavi]

@Frogfucius Why are you trying so hard?

I already said I`m sorry that I offended you.

[Frogfucius]

@Taavi I offended you, which is why you  projected on to me. So I should be the one apologizing, if anything.

Edited December 13, 2016 by Frogfucius

[Taavi]

@Frogfucius If you need the story to sound like that then sure, why not. 

All is well now

[jjer94]

1 hour ago, Frogfucius said:

At least I'm honest and admit I'm doing this for shits and giggles.

Based on your previous posts, I highly doubt that, Froggy.

I felt compelled to come back on here not only to respond to this, but to talk about a general trend I've noticed here on this forum. Of course, I could be totally off, but because of the fact that I fell into the following trap, I thought I'd describe it, just in case anyone is ready to start digging themselves out of it. That includes you, Froggy. 

If you've been on this forum for awhile now, you may notice that the main demographic is typically male, ages 17-25. This particular demographic of people have been discontent with their life circumstances, especially with their relationships with others. Based on my observations, they are often introverted people pleasers, and because they need to constantly put up a front so that nobody disapproves of them, they often prefer to isolate themselves. Enter Leo, who combines self-help and spirituality and eventually ditches self-help altogether for Sage University®, where he advocates ditching relationships to meditate and snort some powder and research all spiritual traditions and contemplate in your room all day in order to attain this elusive achievement called enlightenment. 

Do you see where this is going? This is music to the ears for the aforementioned demographic. Meditating and contemplating and being primarily in solitude allows these introverted people pleasers to avoid relationships and their social anxiety altogether. Then, stack that on top of Leo's advocacy of spiral dynamics, which categorizes people on a sort of spiritual hierarchy. Then, stack that on top of the fact that at first when you think you've "waken up," you look at everyone else as though they are "asleep" and therefore inferior. Yet another reason to avoid real-life relationships: you're too superior to everyone else, so it's not even worth talking to any of them. Then, stack that with the ultimate distraction: the forum. This is where you get to hide behind an avatar where you're safe from real verbal abuse and pretend to be in company with other people, when really, you're just masking your own loneliness because you don't actually want to hurt anybody's feelings and instead want to protect your own ass. It's much safer to live behind a computer screen than to actually have a conversation with someone and pour your heart out and run the risk of hurting their feelings in real time. My point in action: 

19 minutes ago, Frogfucius said:

Again: I have woken up. I don't care about your book, and your fantasies about life are beyond idiotic. One day you'll wake up to how stupid you've been, believing in myth. And you think you've got what it takes to be a sage? Ha! I take shits more enlightened than you.

I'm not saying that meditation, taking psychedelics, contemplation, or any of these introspective activities are fundamentally bad; they can all be quite useful. I'm just saying that just like any other introverted activity, these "spiritual" activities can also be used as an excuse to run away from your social neuroses. So, for Froggy and for anyone else reading, give yourself a truth serum and see if you can be totally honest with yourself. Are you using spirituality to run away from the real work of having to deal with your neuroses? Are you reading countless spiritual books and not taking any action? Are you using the awake/asleep/enlightened/unenlightened/green/orange/yellow stage distinctions to categorize people as a way to isolate and protect yourself (in the end, these distinctions don't actually exist)?

I've sure as hell have been doing all these things, and it wasn't until I took a long break from the forum, started traveling and meeting new people, and doing lots of lots of crying and punching shit that I realized this. 

Anyways. Just some food for thought. Self acceptance goes a long way. 

Cheers.

[Emerald]

2 minutes ago, jjer94 said:

Based on your previous posts, I highly doubt that, Froggy.

I felt compelled to come back on here not only to respond to this, but to talk about a general trend I've noticed here on this forum. Of course, I could be totally off, but because of the fact that I fell into the following trap, I thought I'd describe it, just in case anyone is ready to start digging themselves out of it. That includes you, Froggy. 

If you've been on this forum for awhile now, you may notice that the main demographic is typically male, ages 17-25. This particular demographic of people have been discontent with their life circumstances, especially with their relationships with others. Based on my observations, they are often introverted people pleasers, and because they need to constantly put up a front so that nobody disapproves of them, they often prefer to isolate themselves. Enter Leo, who combines self-help and spirituality and eventually ditches self-help altogether for Sage University®, where he advocates ditching relationships to meditate and snort some powder and research all spiritual traditions and contemplate in your room all day in order to attain this elusive achievement called enlightenment. 

Do you see where this is going? This is music to the ears for the aforementioned demographic. Meditating and contemplating and being primarily in solitude allows these introverted people pleasers to avoid relationships and their social anxiety altogether. Then, stack that on top of Leo's advocacy of spiral dynamics, which categorizes people on a sort of spiritual hierarchy. Then, stack that on top of the fact that at first when you think you've "waken up," you look at everyone else as though they are "asleep" and therefore inferior. Yet another reason to avoid real-life relationships: you're too superior to everyone else, so it's not even worth talking to any of them. Then, stack that with the ultimate distraction: the forum. This is where you get to hide behind an avatar where you're safe from real verbal abuse and pretend to be in company with other people, when really, you're just masking your own loneliness because you don't actually want to hurt anybody's feelings and instead want to protect your own ass. It's much safer to live behind a computer screen than to actually have a conversation with someone and pour your heart out and run the risk of hurting their feelings in real time. My point in action: 

I'm not saying that meditation, taking psychedelics, contemplation, or any of these introspective activities are fundamentally bad; they can all be quite useful. I'm just saying that just like any other introverted activity, these "spiritual" activities can also be used as an excuse to run away from your social neuroses. So, for Froggy and for anyone else reading, give yourself a truth serum and see if you can be totally honest with yourself. Are you using spirituality to run away from the real work of having to deal with your neuroses? Are you reading countless spiritual books and not taking any action? Are you using the awake/asleep/enlightened/unenlightened/green/orange/yellow stage distinctions to categorize people as a way to isolate and protect yourself (in the end, these distinctions don't actually exist)?

I've sure as hell have been doing all these things, and it wasn't until I took a long break from the forum, started traveling and meeting new people, and doing lots of lots of crying and punching shit that I realized this. 

Anyways. Just some food for thought. Self acceptance goes a long way. 

Cheers.

Great observations!

[ajasatya]

@jjer94 your text is orgasmic.

[Frogfucius]

@jjer94 Well, since you've gone to me specific: I've rejected spirituality, hierarchies, consciousness, enlightenment, meditation as a necessity, psychedelics, and "Truth". I think the whole business is just a glorified way of trying to escape reality, and a way of looking down on others. I play the game a bit on here, because it still is kind of interesting and is relevant to the site. I act extreme when the spiritual buffs take their ideals seriously, but I don't take it seriously.

Good insight though. I guess since I'm over this kind of stuff, I might as well move on like you have.

[Taavi]

@jjer94 That is some good stuff right there.

[Bebop]

6 minutes ago, Frogfucius said:

@jjer94 Well, since you've gone to me specific: I've rejected spirituality, hierarchies, consciousness, enlightenment, meditation as a necessity, psychedelics, and "Truth". I think the whole business is just a glorified way of trying to escape reality, and a way of looking down on others. I play the game a bit on here, because it still is kind of interesting and is relevant to the site. I act extreme when the spiritual buffs take their ideals seriously, but I don't take it seriously.

Good insight though. I guess since I'm over this kind of stuff, I might as well move on like you have.

Who is looking down on others? We are trying to teach compassion and acceptance of our fellow beings, and you keep bringing up the absolute and saying all of this is meaningless. If anything you are the one looking down on the very people trying to make a positive change in the world which I find pretty ironic.

[Leo Gura]

Children, children, children.

Can't leave you alone for 24 hours before a food fight erupts.

Sigh...

How long's it gonna take to become conscious that all this nonsense goes against everything I teach?