Journey to 5MEO & Beyond!

[ZenSwift]

In this journal, I will discuss my progression in working with psychedelics with the goal being to work myself up to take 5MEO DMT.

This journal will contain every trip report I create, so you can follow my progression, and see me overcome various fears, roadblocks and obstacles.

I hope this journal serves you as inspiration to embark on your journey with psychedelics to one day do 5MEO (Assuming that is a goal of yours). 

[ZenSwift]

I would like to start this off by sharing one of the most inspirational if not THE most inspirational videos I've personally experienced to date.

Having watched nearly all of Leo's content, this one hit me deep in the feels, and I cried.

This video will inspire you to do 5MeO.

[ZenSwift]

Let me first talk about my mentality about drugs and experience with drugs right from the beginning before I took my first psychedelic. Growing up I was incredibly straight-edge to the point where even when I turned the legal age for drinking at age eighteen, I still heavily avoided alcohol and didn't even have my first drink until a couple years later. I prided myself in being super sober and straight-edge because I didn't see anything positive from anyting drug-related. When I was really young, I was indoctrinated to correlate any sort of substance use with evil and to the point where I actually freaked out and cried when I found out my brother smoked a little bit.

 

Fast forward to a year ago when I was getting my mind opened a heck of a lot through Leo's lectures and listening to hundreds of hours of Leo over the course of a year or so. Every couple of months my reality was shifting significantly because of the amount of knowledge I was feeding into my consciousness. I started to see reality so differently because I had so many new maps to try on and put in place.

 

Right away whenever Leo mentioned psychedelics I did not quite understand why he would talk about such a substance in such a way, but I didn't quite close my mind off to it altogether because of the way he presented it. Over time, I opened myself up more and more to the idea of using psychedelics as a tool. As I listened to Leo, I gained his trust and trusted his authority on the subject of self-actualization, so naturally, I started to trust what he said with regards to psychedelics.

 

My mind really opened up to the idea of using psychedelics when Leo reinforced the point that you could be getting years worth of gains in a single psychedelic trip. Especially when Leo said that 95% of your self-actualization results are going to be coming from the practices. I believe this was communicated in his video the "65 core principles of living the good life". With psychedelics being one of the practice routines to try, and arguably one of the most powerful ones, I was sold on trying it out.

 

So right away I was ready to do my research and get my hands on some magic mushrooms.

Edited September 22, 2021 by ZenSwift

[ZenSwift]

I was talking to my brother about my interests in psychedelics for self-actualization purposes. And he said to smoke a bit of weed first so I can get used to losing control of my consciousness because it is something like none other.

I was at first very close-minded to this idea because I was very against weed and using drugs for fun. I was dead serious about only using substances to grow myself and nothing else. 

But eventually, I took his advice and went to his house and took a hit of weed from a vapourizer and then was super high for 3 hours.

This was a very positive experience.

Some time after that in the future, I then ended up trying out a 2.5 mg THC gummy. It did nothing, and I was disappointed from the lack of experience.

So naturally, the next dose for my next trip was FOUR times that. I jumped it all the way up to 10 mg, and I did it while floating down a river on a float with a bunch of other people having their rafts all tied together into one large party float thingy. 

This was a very unanticipated experience.

My everything was high. My body was super high and my mind was insanely high. Here I quickly learned how sensitive I was two substances. I should have known with my previous experience with alcohol. Through this experience I had a crash course on letting go and just letting things happen because I had no control. I had such a body high that I felt like I was engulfed in a extremely high viscosity fluid, like honey or peanut butter. My mind high was so bad that I was forgetting who I was every three minutes and every three minutes felt like a new chapter. Time was so slow.

But I wasn't THAT stupid because I at least made sure I had my big sister as my trip sitter to make sure I didn't die. ?

At one point during that trip I remember having to pee so bad that I just hung my lower half of myself over in the water while floating down the river while holding onto someone's back. ?

 

After that I think I did have another THC edible trip in a much safer setting at home.

 

But the point of the story is this; as someone who was not experienced with anything but getting slightly drunk on alcohol, getting high on weed was definitely a great first stepping stone to help prepare me for what was coming with psilocybin.

[ZenSwift]

Alright, let's talk about the build-up before I took my first dose of psilocybin. I believe I have done more research into psychedelics than any other 20 year old I know. I followed Leo's advice to the T on the research end, where I made sure I knew damn near everything I needed to know; where I made sure that there was no stone unturned and there was nothing that I didn't know. This level of research has also carried over into other areas of my life where it taught me how to be extremely thorough with my research, and it shows.

While learning about psilocybin, I simultaneously taught myself how to research extremely deeply, more than most people.

I studied Leo's videos on psychedelics, I read trip reports, I studied dosages, I studied how to consume the substance, how to aquire it, everything. Leo's guide on how to use psychedelics for personal development was perfect for guiding my research.

I built myself my own personal document on everything I needed to know. At first just jotting down every piece of useful information I found, and then later organizing it and putting a structure to it.

I spent a few solid weeks doing thorough research before I took my first dose.

[ZenSwift]

From the beginning, I treated psychedelics like a vial of nitroglycerin. I was VERY scared of psychedelics.

Ever since my first trip I got intimate with fear. I had a MASSIVE amount of fear of just taking a 1g shroom tea. As I learned how to work through this fear it has proved to be vital in my understanding that will aid in my future trips. Fear is something to be understood. I knew that I had to work through this fear in order to get to these higher levels of understanding.

I didn't listen to any music throughout the trip, only the first 3 songs in the beginning to boost my state. I sat in the same spot in the entire trip, only getting up to go to the washroom.

 

There was actually a point in the tip where there was literally over a hundred physical birds gathering around a small apple tree that we had in the backyard. It was like a snow white moment or something.

A lot of times in the trip, to sway my experience into the positive direction, I verbally said "That's beautiful, and THAT'S beautiful, and that's beautiful!"

I said a lot of deep shit in this report, but looking back at it now, with my new depth of understanding now, I had NO idea how deep the iceberg was that I was standing on.

 

My system is extremely sensitive, the visuals that I got on 1g, other people would need 3g. 

With every consciousness altering substance I take, I get everything: The body high, The mind high and The Visuals.

So every time I look into a new psychedelic, I make sure I look at all of the visuals, body effects, and cognitive effects, because I know that I will get them all.

[ZenSwift]

Learning from Leo that if your intuition is playing to win, then it IS authentic intuition.

I found running a few kilometers as a GREAT way to clear out the negativity in the mind and also the fear.

I was scared shitless.

I've learned that it is best to Contemplate your intention, before, during, and after the trip.

Especially in my first few trip reports, I report a lot of the subjective effects, like the visuals and the body feelings. These were pieces of information that I wanted to have when I was doing my research.

The shroom overtakes you and eats your brain, like a bunch of tentacles creeping their way in.

At this time, looking at any faces at all REALLY scared me. Looking at people's faces, and ESPECIALLY looking at my face in the mirror. 

I first started noticing this feeling of "impending doom", or a feeling that at any moment, the entirety of reality would be turned inside out and upside down. Like there was not much keeping reality together the way it is right now. I've noticed this feeling especially on my later trips.

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When you're in it though, you have a strange ability to just cope with the load you're given.

This is something I've noticed with my "bad trips". I can be in hell, but I could still keep myself alive for the next few seconds, and a few seconds more, and a few seconds more. When that situation IS your reality, you are thrusted into taking responsibility and taking on that load. That's how you grow. 

 

One thing I've noticed with mushrooms is that it will throw you off the cliff. When you're scared to jump, it throws you right into it.

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>At one point I was scared of my legs.

To this day I am not sure as to exactly why I was so freaked out by my legs. Maybe it was because at one point my legs didn't appear to be "mine".

But at this time to I was just scared of any visuals moving that were close to me. 

Like I was looking at my blanket at one point and it scared me that it was breathing.

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I learned just HOW therapeutic it is to just CRY and throw a tantrum like a 3 year old. A bad cry lets the fear right out, it all goes away and gets purified.

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You have to face your fears, in order to finally get past that and take a look at what is. What is actually going on. 

As my trips progress, I am becoming more and more conscious of how pragmatic it is to face all of your fears.

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During this trip I also noticed that any suppressed things in your psyche will come up. One of these things in my psyche was admitting to myself homosexual fantasies I had. Just being honest with myself and what this body/vessel naturally wants. And coming to terms with how that conflicted with my perceived identity that I constructed my entire life. I was learning how I needed to let go of my attachment to the "social ego"; the part of me that was my socially perceived sexual orientation.

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After the fear of death is relinquished, every creepy spider leg becomes beautiful, because you realize it comes from a place from non-defensive survival.

In this trip I learned about the power of FULLY surrendering to your fears, and once you do, you feel THE BEST! 

[ZenSwift]

I was just testing out the difference in potency between mushroom strains. I believe that different strains have different personalities, as well as different potency. A gram of blue meanies will be WAY more potent than a gram of golden teachers. Apparently the strain b+ will also yield a lot more positive trips, giving its name: Be Positive (B+).

I learned how to be more authentic with my desires.

I also learned how fear and anxiety are simply just defense mechanisms to control the sense of self.

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Existing is like being in a fish tank. Trapped

I got this "fishtank feeling" where I was confined to nothing but my perceptions. 

I think this was an experience of being nothing but the room, how you are literally nothing but the being-ness that "you" "experience". See Leo's video: "What is Perception?".

 

My intention was also to use Leo's busting limiting beliefs worksheet that you get in the Life Purpose Course to help bust my limiting beliefs around my perceived inability to focus. This was the result:

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I was always capable of the focus I desired, I just was never given a chance to prove it to myself because I was given medication for so many years starting at such an early age. So it is through my actions now that I am showing myself that I have the ability to cultivate the focus that I desire.

[ZenSwift]

Mushroom Trip Report 004

 

On 7/22/2021 at 6:11 PM, ZenSwift said:

With experience, fear is overcome. 

This attitude is what carried me the farthest with all psychedelics. Since the very first time I took psychedelics it has been a battle with fear. So this is prepared me very well to be accepting that psychedelic trips will have fear. As a result the attitude that I have towards psychedelics and fear is a lot stronger than most people. This has been my greatest asset because when it comes to getting to the greatest insights, you have to be willing to tread through a mountain of fear. 

Anytime I've had a bad trip I always found it as something that has made me stronger and happier when I come out the other end.

On 7/22/2021 at 6:11 PM, ZenSwift said:

There's nothing but God completely filling all of your ear holes and eye holes. There's just so much God to experience. It's overwhelming. Wow.

There are many times on early trips when I think I'm saying something profound but in reality I'm just taking ideas and speculation and projecting my high state onto it. I'll say something that might be technically true but I haven't actually gotten to the essence of that truth myself and so as a result I'm just a little bit naïve. Someone that actually knows God can identify through someone's writing very quickly if they know God or not. 

On 7/22/2021 at 6:11 PM, ZenSwift said:

You're going to love an ego death.

I discovered what it was like on this trip to really experience a wiping of fear, maybe it was an ego death, maybe not, but my fear was definitely wiped. 

This is one of the techniques I've discovered when it comes to facing a bad trip: Go for an ego death. 

On 7/22/2021 at 6:11 PM, ZenSwift said:

Shadow work is so easy while I'm shrooms. Even when you're crying, you still feel like your hugged. 

 

On 7/22/2021 at 6:11 PM, ZenSwift said:

Every state of consciousness is a gift that you're given.

 

On 7/22/2021 at 6:11 PM, ZenSwift said:

I can only see that fear continues to be reduced through more and more experience. Which is GOOD! 

 

On 7/22/2021 at 6:11 PM, ZenSwift said:

Overcoming fear is the master key to life. 

 

[ZenSwift]

Mushroom Trip Report 005

This is probably one of my more terrifying trips, and it was one of those trips where I ended up facing my fears willingly. 

 

I also really started to tune in and listen to my body when it comes to making sure that it feels right by exercising it and feeding it the right food every single day. This is my way of cultivating self respect. Keeping a solid sleep schedule is one of the best ways I can show myself self-respect. 

 

I’ve also noticed on this trip that when you go for an ego death, it is a cheat code to delete any overwhelming fear. 

 

I strongly believe that you must do all of your shadow work when you first approach psychedelics. This includes consciously eliminating all fear. This will help you a lot in the long run on your psychonaut journey.

 

>”Reality is a moot point, it's your projections onto it that make you fear it.”

 

I realised deeply the importance of Clarity in living a profound life.

[ZenSwift]

Mushroom Trip Report 006 - 2.5g GT

Need guidance - 2.5g Golden Teachers - Trip Report

This is a really powerful trip for me because I no longer needed to identify with an identity that kept me in a toxic group of friends. I was able to let go of that identity fully. The idea of this group of people was looming over me for too long, and I needed to cut them off ASAP.

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"If they knew the truth they wouldn't say these things to me and act that way towards me."

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"I am like a monkey in a cage. I walk into the room, I walk into the cage. There is nothing there for me. I'm just a clown for them to look at. A monkey in a cage to entertain them."

This was the crux of my insight for that trip that really allowed me to let go of those people.

 

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“Shut it down! Shut it down! Shut it down!”

 

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“You have infinite Freedom, which is why it's so difficult to get focused.”

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“Learn about reality until you fall in love with it .”

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“Cultivate enough understanding of reality to the point where every waking second is just amazing.”

When you understand every single nuance of fundamental reality, the whole experience gets enhanced and you get to appreciate it way more.

Started to realize just a little bit more how my actions are connected myself how I show self-respect for my life. I show giving a shit about my life by holding down a strict morning routine and a strict night routine.

After this trip, I proceeded to have a super heightened state of anxiety for the next 30+ days. Consisting of the worst anxiety attacks ever. My entire next month was basically spent with me watching YouTube or whatever to distract myself from this constant anxiety I felt in my chest at the time. Still don’t know what these kinds of anxiety attacks are, but it’s basically some form of psychosis. Very infinity-like, very combination-like, very mind-fuckey. No psychedelic trip is as bad as these anxiety attacks. Shamanic breathing really helped me here to fight through this. But I think also having a job where I was constantly focused on physical labor helped me a lot.

 

As of writing this on December 22nd, 2022, the anxiety attacks greet me on rare occasions, but when they do, it only occurs when I am overtired. These anxiety states come with a really off-putting body feeling of my fingers needing to fold inwards like a 4th dimensional object. Very uncomfortable stuff. But as long as I manage a sleep schedule, I should be good.

  

[ZenSwift]

Mushroom Trip 007 - 1.1g GT

DEEP Insight on How to Build Skills - 1.1g Golden Teachers Trip Report

This is where I found “MY SONG”!

The Deep insight on how to build skills is that when you are trying to improve yourself in any domain, you must concentrate and focus with extreme conscious intent. No unconscious, dumb reps, ever. Your consciousness and awareness need to be turned up to 11 when practicing. Really make each rep count where you are chasing the perfect rep every time, really going for the burn in each rep, where you feel the pain of stretching yourself into new domains of excellence. Pain and discomfort are great indicators of growth. Every time you step in the activity, it is approached with a religious seriousness. Such that it is approached with a goal to fully use up your psyche, where you feel satisfied that you are fully spent that day. This is how you invigorate and spiritualize your life. Pick an ideal of who you ought to become, and do your best to MERGE with that ideal through passionate action. Create a massive amount of momentum by putting in the volume every single day. If applicable, consider putting yourself in the optimal environment to force you to grow even more.

Especially when it comes to contemplating, you want to acquire LASER FOCUS in order to create enough momentum for a breakthrough to occur.

 

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“By emptying my mind I will become more creative. Emptying your mind is going to the source.”

I remember that I need to spend time occasionally allowing myself to get bored in a meditation where I do nothing and clear my mind. As this will aid in maximizing my creative results.

 

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“SUCCESS! I didn't dive deep down into a pit of infinite anxiety after the trip”

This was my biggest fear for this trip, as the last time I did mushrooms, I was in a world of pain every single day for over a month. I was extremely worried about whether or not I was able to do psychedelics ever again.

 

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“I also learned the power of going in alone. WAY BETTER! So much more authenticity. Just you, and reality.”

This is important to note. If you are a serious psychonaut, you have to learn how to trip alone to tap into the deep authentic parts of yourself. Even having someone around you can sway the trip in a bad way. On mushrooms, you can be in a world of pain about one context, and then be completely fine a minute later. But if you have a sober friend right there, he can extend the length of time the context is focused on, keeping you in the pain for an even longer period of time.

Edited December 23, 2022 by ZenSwift

[ZenSwift]

Mushrooms Trip Report 008 - 2g of Shroom Chocolates

2g Shroom Chocolate Trip Report - Psilocybin Magic Mushrooms

So I went hiking with my family in this forest that was thick and looked like something straight out of the Lord of The Rings. Very high humidity causing tons of growth of mushrooms, moss and freaking massive, thick trees, with roots everywhere. The body high I got made hiking back so much easier, I had so much energy at my disposal, tapping into the animalistic reservoir of energy that I hold.

I was able to experience massive levels of open-mindedness. So open minded that I believed that I had the ability to perform miracles like spawn tree branches out of rocks. So open minded that the duality between gender collapsed for me at the time.

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“My mind was so open that I had to really think through why I should keep my arms. I was ready to just die and be okay with that.”

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“The insight into reality was so deep that I went "insane", and had a hard time keeping it together because even ideas that I ever took a psychedelic started to collapse.”

I was also in a state where contexts and social constructions (Self construct/Ego) fled the mind entirely, and I had to figure out how to interact with people properly.

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“In the middle of the trip, I was ready to smoke 5meo.”

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“It's rough to go through a psychedelic trip, BUT the information you get is very important for your life and as you grow your understanding that you are God.”

This is an important insight to hold to yourself, where you keep tripping, no matter how much fear you have to face. As this attitude will help you get VERY far.

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“I let go of my life. I saw my life as a cog in the machine of the super organism of the human race.”

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“I had my mind so open that I had a really difficult time understanding all the imaginary barriers and ways humans carve up reality. In this state, it was obvious how everything is connected to a big picture, to a large holonic structure. How everything you do, speak, and think, plays a significant, impactful role in this holonic web that is reality.”

Holism is very important in this work.

Edited December 23, 2022 by ZenSwift

[ZenSwift]

LSD Trip Report 001 - 50 mcg Sublingual 

50mcg of LSD - First LSD Trip - Trip Report

I was starting to scratch the surface with just how much reality is dependent on artificial constructs. Each individual room felt like its own setting for its own personal story. In this trip, I noticed a whole lot around how stories and contexts are what ground reality. My curiosity was piqued so much that my next intention for my second LSD trip became: What is Context?

I found that although it’s a whole lot easier to contemplate using LSD, you still have to make a strong conscious effort to concentrate if you want to make any significant progress in any direction

LSD is like a tunnel that you keep going down in the same direction for miles on end. If you concentrate and focus hard, you can penetrate super deeply with a compound like this. On LSD you can really focus on your intention and really laser in with increasing preciseness. Whereas psilocybin is like a sporadic journey where you are jumping onto a new context every 5 minutes. This is a double edged sword. When you have a bad trip on LSD, it is likely going to stay a bad trip for the rest of the duration, and also it’s going to spiral downhill as the trip progresses. Whereas with Psilocybin, you can have a terrible trip, but then an hour later pop out of the anguish and be having a great time! This is where they say Mushrooms are forgiving and LSD is not forgiving.

I was able to tap into a TINY tiny amount of where LSD can take you, where it can take you into these mystical states of mystery and wonder. Tapping into what I called “Raw Reality”, which is basically what reality is perceived like when stripped of some of its contexts, making it fundamentally more mysterious and magical.

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“>Reality was trying to give me a warning shot. To make sure that I have EVERYTHING under control for future trips”

One of the most important things I learned on this LSD trip was that it is SO important to control your environment ABSOLUTELY. You need to make it such that you cannot have a single distraction for the entirety of the trip. Put signs up on your door for no doorbell ringing, no knocking, no soliciting, no religious people, NOBODY! Put earplugs in, buy a second phone that has no SIM card, where you cannot have people contact you at all! Have everything locked down and controlled as much as possible! Anything that enters your consciousness WILL completely infect you. Don’t do an LSD trip when you have ANY pressing worries such as worries around your survival.

[ZenSwift]

LSD Trip 002 - 50mcg Rectal ROA

~50mcg of LSD Rectal ROA Trip Report

I was very excited to try out the rectal route of administration with promises of the trip time being cut in half, as well as a faster come up. Especially given the context that my first trip had taken over an hour to start to feel any significant effects. I was very pleased with the result with just how fast the LSD was able to kick in. 

This is my first trip where I really got some traction with contemplation combined with psychedelics. It showed me the real power of how to use psychedelics effectively to contemplate deeply about reality.

The amount of insights that I was able to generate was astounding. It took me the entire night to write it all down. I stayed up all night until the next day.

 

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“The mind is the net that holds reality in it.”

“Your mind creates reality by interweaving a web of contexts.”

It was so crazy to have such a simple intention unlock so much potential. After studying the structure of language a tiny bit, I was really intrigued about the structure of knowledge and that led me to the intention of “What is context?”.

 

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“Reality is just a tightly-knit context. So tightly knit that it feels real. It seems real. But it's a net of context. It's so tightly knit that the illusion is TOTAL. As you unwire each strand of the net you realize just how loose it is. Once you unwire enough strands then you realize that IT IS A NET.”

I started to deconstruct reality to the point where I am starting to understand more than ever that reality is nothing but a deeply interwoven web of contexts. That's what gives everything its substance. “Reality” as you know it, physical matter, meaning, value, the mind, is all a cobbled together, tightly weaved net of contexts. Once you learn how to deconstruct these things, such as value, you can also learn how to construct them. In this way, you gain a little bit of God's power, for he is the one that has the intelligence to create and destroy. What I then learned is that enlightenment is just merely a process of focusing your awareness on deconstructing this web of contexts that makes up your direct experience. Once you’ve deconstructed your mind a sufficient amount, it will naturally lose its ability to hold water and you will naturally lose your mind. Through becoming more and more conscious of the illusions that make up reality, the more you realize that it’s all a sham, it’s all a game played by a master illusionist. This will lead to your awakenings.

That is my hypothesis.

 

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“Enlightenment is simply just stripping all context. To the point that it deconstructs your ego, your self. All the ideas grounding you in this room, then all the ideas grounding you in the body. Then all the ideas grounding your consciousness in your head.”

I feel like when you strip all the contexts that you are attached to that is grounding your reality, you will deconstruct your self-construct/ego and all of reality around you. This is how you awaken. This is what psychedelics do. the more potent the psychedelic, the more it strips your mind of these perceived set-in-stone contexts. The reason why the ego NEEDS to go is because the EGO is the strongest attachment you have that is keeping you from the truth. It grounds reality through homeostatic defense mechanisms such as fear, anxiety, pain and suffering. It would be so counterintuitive to question the validity of your suffering because of how terrible it is to experience. Which is precisely the genius mechanism that is keeping you from Awakening.

 

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“The amount of concentration I have is unbelievable. I've built up an insane amount of momentum here.  It seems like an ego death, an enlightenment is simply a momentum build up? I see how an enlightenment requires momentum.”

I realize the ONLY way you can reach these breakthrough experiences is by creating some serious momentum. Concentration and laser-focused intent is a vital skill to cultivate for this work.

 

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“There is nothing to accomplish, yet reality pushes me in ways in order to evolve my consciousness. The way reality functions is it's evolution.”

I've noticed that in my life, reality will have things line up just too fucking perfectly that will facilitate my growth. My own desires and needs are pieces of the great puzzle. When I play my part, I will further the evolution of mankind. 

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“An ego was created as a tool. This tool is very useful because it gets things done. There's too much demonization of the ego. Rather, it must be just understood of what it is and the role it plays. It plays a very important role. Without the ego it would be a lot worse in terms of getting stuff accomplished.”

I believe that there is way too much demonization on the ego/self-construct. The ego is an incredible tool that will allow you to bootstrap yourself effectively in order to achieve what you want in life. You have to be honest with yourself because you DO want things. If you're like the rest of the human race, you are naturally attached to accomplishing something, or getting some sort of experience out of life before you die. When you learn how to deconstruct the ego, you can learn how to construct it in ways to your own advantage. There's something very wise about being honest with yourself and knowing that the ego is an incredible tool in helping you get what you want. Ironically enough, to do all the work to learn all the shit you need to deconstruct your Ego in the first place requires ego. You need to get your ego on board emotionally so that you can do the emotionally difficult labor that is required. It's very twisted.

 

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“Your hand is made out of itself, as itself, as it appears right now.”

On this trip I started to realize that reality is nothing but appearances itself. If you zoom in, yes you will see more divisions of this infinite fractal that is reality, but making the correlation that the small parts make up the big parts as cause and effect is an illusion that you have constructed and strung together in your mind to create a sense of continuity. This narrative and story is a total farce. Whereas the truth is that reality exists absolutely how it is at all levels without being grounded in any subdivisions. Each level of the holon exists perfectly without needing to lean on the other levels. However much you zoom in or zoom out of the holon, whatever you are looking at right now is how it exists at the absolute level, and it doesn't lean on any parts of the smaller holon or the bigger holons to have permission to exist. Existence needs no permission.

 

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“Opening your mind to the point of crazy is simply opening your mind enough…”

“The amount of responsibility you take when you open your mind this much is insane.”

I have started to really understand the importance of exercising epistemological rigor onto your insights and your contemplations, because when you open your mind this much, it is SO EASY to get deluded. Why? Because once you start to take your Authority back, the only thing that differentiates what you believe and what you do not believe is where you place the authority. I feel that too many people can too easily place the authority of truth in the mystical experiences that psychedelics can provide. Insights must be tested, and triple checked. They must be challenged. It is so easy to ground these insights in the frames that you've been indoctrinated with from your preferred spiritual teachings. If you’re not careful, you will unconsciously create a reality by imposing your projected contexts onto it, and because you are God, and you have absolute authority, your beliefs that you project onto reality will actually appear to be absolutely true. This is especially true if you don't have a good understanding of what absolute truth actually is. 

 

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“> I had a lot of deep insights about manifestation itself, the structure of manifestation, and how it connects with this idea of a network. A self constructed, tightly weaved net, which is basically what all manifestation boils down to. Creating a net between your current net and the nodes you want your net to be a part of."

Let me try to explain that here. Imagine two lattice structures that are separated from each other. These two structures represent a web of contexts that are so tightly interconnected and interweaved that they are able to suspend themselves in mid-air as an actual “thing” Manifestation is connecting the lattice structure of your current reality and the lattice structure of your vision by building an increasingly thickened bridge between them.

First, you must be able to fully articulate your current reality such that you fully understand what is going on and why things are going on because otherwise you will not be able to understand how to change any of it. 

Second, you have to work endlessly to Vision out how your life will look like with all of your accomplishments and goals reached. 

Once you have these two realities very vividly built into your mind, then you can figure out a way of how to weave them both together. The more connections and strands you weave between them, the easier it will be to take the daily action required to fulfill your vision. In other words, the more you see it, the more you'll believe it.

So you need to take massive amounts of time to construct these two lattice structures very vividly in your mind, and then start to create a vivid bridge between them. The more vivid the better. As vague visions produce vague results.

What is most important here is that when you finally create this Vision connecting your current reality to your ideal reality, you need to strongly identify the actions that you are taking every single day. What the fuck you are actually doing moment to moment is the most important thing to focus on because that is actually what gets you the results.

I feel that it is important to mention this post as well:

 

 

Quote

“>I realized that there is a deep connection with Intelligence and Beauty.”

This is a relationship to be explored at a deeper level. If I want to make my life become more beautiful, I need to install more intelligence into it. If I want Reality to become more beautiful, I need to start to understand the intelligence behind it.