Tantric bdsm ( Conscious kink )

[Javfly33]

I might try this weird shit soon. Discovered a dominatrix which some years ago switched to doing tantra and Consciousness perspectives.

Lets remember than bdsm and fetishes are darkness and ego shadows, and tantra IS the supposedly the higuest kind of sex (purest/healthiest) energy a human can develop. Apparently are two opposites sides of the Coin according to the current literature.

This woman says can play between the two to provide the healing/release experience you need. (Obviously in a person which has bdsm tendendies/fetishes. If you Dont have then theres no point. Just go to a classical tantra massager i Guess)

It might waste a money too But i am def intrigued how the experience can be. Does anyone here tried something similar?

[flowboy]

I'm friends with multiple tantric domina and body workers who specialize in this. I have a very high opinion of them. They really help people, and it is a profoundly spiritual endeavour.

There's also some very good workshops I know of.

Go for it!

[Javfly33]

@flowboy sent you a DM

[PurpleTree]

yea why not, if you find a good one

maybe you can clear some blockages

i thought about going to a tantra yoga group (which is naked yoga etc.) but i'm not sure

[peanutspathtotruth]

2 hours ago, flowboy said:

I'm friends with multiple tantric domina

You're doing something right then 

[Globalcollective]

@Javfly33 really interesting, I have always been intrigued to try BDSM but always worried it might be damaging to my spiritual growth, maybe this is the anwser ?

Have you tired it yet?

[Elisabeth]

On 16/09/2021 at 11:43 AM, Javfly33 said:

Lets remember than bdsm and fetishes are darkness and ego shadows, and tantra IS the supposedly the higuest kind of sex (purest/healthiest) energy a human can develop. Apparently are two opposites sides of the Coin according to the current literature.

What literature. How ignorant. 

From my tantric education (admittedly limited, though I've had a year of weekly training), tantra values saying yes to experience, including consciously living through desires. 

From my (much broader) bdsm experience, if you're into it, bdsm touches the very core of your being, your sexual energy and your will to live through challenges. 

There's no contradiction.

Do bdsm desires fall away as you walk the spiritual or the tantric path? Personally, I think that besides psychological conditioning, there's a deep bodily-spiritual component that's hard-wired into the layer where personal identity meats biology, so as long as you're in a body and have a personality to come back to, some bdsm preference may stay. So you may as well be ok with having them and include them in your spiritual living as a part of your body's wishes instead of labeling them dark and trying to transcend them as fast as possible. 

[Javfly33]

@Elisabeth I am defintely surrendering to them to feel them as accepting them as full as posible.

However, its also true that some bdsm inclinations go Hand in Hand with self-hate and harmful beliefs.

For example as a man inclined to femdom and last year to findom, I've find that when i have unveiled false harmful beliefs about women and myself (like a weekend socializing for example and discovering Im not "Broken" or "wrong" or "bad") i felt more inclined to being turn on by normal sex. Yet in moments of isolation, social anxiety, beliefs about myself+women ...etc have been always a trigger for seeking femdom, findom, etc and all kind of sense of "being abused" and feeling "hated" by the opposite sex and enjoy It. I'm not saying the fetish are bad, i think they are there to BE FELT, yet one cant avoid to think that if the triggers are mental health problems and harmful beliefs, they are a representation of the low state of Consciousness of the person.

I Guess that better than saying that bdsm IS bad, is better to say that bdsm inclinations are INDICATORS of trauma, self harmful beliefs, mental health problems, ego...etc.

In the same sense that a stomach Pain IS not really bad, is just an indicator you have been poisoned. The Pain have a purpose, i Guess in the same way bdsm does ?

[Javfly33]

I might be weird, But hate-kind of thoughts have always felt terribly bad 'round here.  

Now this progressive kinky culture here trying to tell you that you might be anything else less that Love and you should accetp It?

now they normalize hate as something you have to accept ? Hace we gone crazy @Nahm ? 

Edited September 19, 2021 by Javfly33

[Roy]

On 9/16/2021 at 2:43 AM, Javfly33 said:

Lets remember than bdsm and fetishes are darkness and ego shadows

I think there is a lot of projection and armchair psychoanalysis going on when people make such claims and assumptions about people who partake in these things. I'm sure it has something to do with it, but not everyone who is into a niche sexual activity has some kind of damaged or warped psyche.

Sometimes the only way to get off is having a cattle prod shoved up your ass, you know?

[Nahm]

@Javfly33

We been crazy all along. 

[Javfly33]

24 minutes ago, Roy said:

I think there is a lot of projection and armchair psychoanalysis going on when people make such claims and assumptions about people who partake in these things. I'm sure it has something to do with it, but not everyone who is into a niche sexual activity has some kind of damaged or warped psyche.

Sometimes the only way to get off is having a cattle prod shoved up your ass, you know?

Fair enough, But take a look at my last reply to the user @Elisabeth

 

[Thought Art]

On 9/16/2021 at 6:43 AM, Javfly33 said:

I might try this weird shit soon. Discovered a dominatrix which some years ago switched to doing tantra and Consciousness perspectives.

Lets remember than bdsm and fetishes are darkness and ego shadows, and tantra IS the supposedly the higuest kind of sex (purest/healthiest) energy a human can develop. Apparently are two opposites sides of the Coin according to the current literature.

This woman says can play between the two to provide the healing/release experience you need. (Obviously in a person which has bdsm tendendies/fetishes. If you Dont have then theres no point. Just go to a classical tantra massager i Guess)

It might waste a money too But i am def intrigued how the experience can be. Does anyone here tried something similar?

Tantra is actually ammoral 

[PurpleTree]

41 minutes ago, Thought Art said:

Tantra is actually ammoral 

immoral or amoral? and why?

[Elisabeth]

On 19/09/2021 at 9:36 PM, Javfly33 said:

@Elisabeth I am defintely surrendering to them to feel them as accepting them as full as posible.

However, its also true that some bdsm inclinations go Hand in Hand with self-hate and harmful beliefs.

For example as a man inclined to femdom and last year to findom, I've find that when i have unveiled false harmful beliefs about women and myself (like a weekend socializing for example and discovering Im not "Broken" or "wrong" or "bad") i felt more inclined to being turn on by normal sex. Yet in moments of isolation, social anxiety, beliefs about myself+women ...etc have been always a trigger for seeking femdom, findom, etc and all kind of sense of "being abused" and feeling "hated" by the opposite sex and enjoy It. I'm not saying the fetish are bad, i think they are there to BE FELT, yet one cant avoid to think that if the triggers are mental health problems and harmful beliefs, they are a representation of the low state of Consciousness of the person.

I Guess that better than saying that bdsm IS bad, is better to say that bdsm inclinations are INDICATORS of trauma, self harmful beliefs, mental health problems, ego...etc.

In the same sense that a stomach Pain IS not really bad, is just an indicator you have been poisoned. The Pain have a purpose, i Guess in the same way bdsm does ?

I hear your experience and refuse to generalize it. 

My bdsm preference isn't a symptom of self-hate and harmful beliefs. I am NOT inclined to do bdsm when I hate myself. 

There might be some early-on attachment trauma going on, I seem to have that, but I didn't make any direct link to my kinks yet. 

I refuse to look at something that has given me genuine happiness as an indicator of "being broken". IF ever my bdsm preferences disappear completely as a result of shadow work, then I'll be able to say they stemmed from trauma. Until then, it's better to treat them as human variation. 

Some people like sports, although it gives them physical pain, or exactly because it causes the body to cope with that stress through endorphines. Some people meditate through incredible suffering. Neither is considered a result of trauma, it's considered healthy. 

Why is someone who enjoys working through suffering and reaching an endorphin high through spanking or rope, while also enjoying intimacy with their partner, seen as more traumatized than the average population? Think about it. It makes no sense. 

So I'd say bdsm prefereces and submission fantasies certainly CAN indicate trauma, but they don't necessarily need to. Enjoy your exploration! 

Edited September 20, 2021 by Elisabeth

[Javfly33]

3 hours ago, Elisabeth said:

I hear your experience and refuse to generalize it. 

My bdsm preference isn't a symptom of self-hate and harmful beliefs. I am NOT inclined to do bdsm when I hate myself. 

There might be some early-on attachment trauma going on, I seem to have that, but I didn't make any direct link to my kinks yet. 

I refuse to look at something that has given me genuine happiness as an indicator of "being broken". IF ever my bdsm preferences disappear completely as a result of shadow work, then I'll be able to say they stemmed from trauma. Until then, it's better to treat them as human variation. 

Some people like sports, although it gives them physical pain, or exactly because it causes the body to cope with that stress through endorphines. Some people meditate through incredible suffering. Neither is considered a result of trauma, it's considered healthy. 

Why is someone who enjoys working through suffering and reaching an endorphin high through spanking or rope, while also enjoying intimacy with their partner, seen as more traumatized than the average population? Think about it. It makes no sense. 

So I'd say bdsm prefereces and submission fantasies certainly CAN indicate trauma, but they don't necessarily need to. Enjoy your exploration! 

I find It just find that there are people that confess having no link between bdsm and trauma, But i just find suspicious that a lot of people I've talked to about this, get very triggered when i say my opinion.

Like, yo, honestly i just Care about my relationship with bdsm, But why you guys get so triggered when i say bdsm IS indicator of low Consciousness if you guys feel so good and healthy with It? ?

[Javfly33]

I think Im gonna pass btw, she charges a lot and honestly Im going to pay to feel bad about myself meh Dont think It Will be Smart 

[Elisabeth]

@Javfly33 It's a core part of identity/ego, I give you that. 

Why would a LGBTQ person get triggered when people say they are sick/sinnful/traumatized? 

......

You have a point though, gotta work on some more shame.

Edited September 20, 2021 by Elisabeth

[PurpleTree]

50 minutes ago, Elisabeth said:

You have a point though, gotta work on some more shame.

How do you do that?