Too selfish for God realization

[PepperBlossoms]

@Carl-Richard I read your posts.  Wow.

What is the thing that allows you to stay in human mode and not god mode?  What does the god mode feel like and how does that compare?  What kind of "walls" do you have to imagine to keep god mode out and stay in human mode?

For instance, if I pay attention to the stickiness from the sweat on my body and the way the clothes feel and the way the human body feels against the floor and the thoughts are all on perspective of everything in relation to human version me, then I can see being in human mode.  How does that compare to god mode for you for the times that it has started to happen?

I have had glimpses of god mode while on psychedelics and I guess it is just this notion that I am everything and there is no wall or boundary between anything - but yet I keep staying in human mode.

 

[Carl-Richard]

7 hours ago, PepperBlossoms said:

What is the thing that allows you to stay in human mode and not god mode?

Acting like a normal human: not going too long without food, overeating, creating tension in the body, subpar posture, don't sit too still, keep your mind occupied at all times. The worst part about this is that I always feel resistance against fully immersing myself in a song or a movie, and feeling emotionally detached. It's not good for my health.

The way I describe it is that a normal human maintains their sense of self by having a natural resistance to some things but less to others (which they're not conscious of and don't have to think about), meanwhile I have to maintain a steady baseline of resistance which is generally much weaker and has less fluctuations but which doesn't allow me to have deep, discriminate passion for particular things (which used to be music and guitar). Because what happens when I get too immersed in guitar playing, I start sliding down the path of ego death ?

[nistake]

That's a very valuable insight.

If you think about it, that's exactly what 'manual' spiritual practises do. You're giving up your identity and everything that you're attached to. Only in tiny increments. That's why ego backlashes occur.

[PepperBlossoms]

When in a relationship, we may imagine a wall of the things that we now can and cannot do because we are in a relationship but the wall may be imagined and not actually there.

The same could apply to human vs. god consciousness.  We imagine a wall that isn't actually there that is separating us from god vs human consciousness.

Walls even though not there but we believe them to be there so we act as such.  "Oh I will not do xyz because that is what the wall requires."

I made up the wall and I pretend it is there.  However, walls can be useful techniques and can then get you to behave a certain way - such as a wall of - oh I won't talk to other guys as I am in a relationship.  So the wall you have which seems to be working is to eat a lot, have bad posture, etc. which seems to be working well but yet having some problems on your health.

It can be hard to keep walls up but one can do it especially if having a super bad experience when dropping the wall.

If you drop the wall and go into god mode, could you build it again and go back and forth kinda like going inside and outside a house or focusing on the inside thoughts versus outside environment.... could you architect the walls? - like put up windows or make it of various transparencies? like a chain link fence or a glass window - of which would have varying access between human and god mode

or create a map so you can find your way back to human mode - which it looks like you have done that by focusing on food, posture, thoughts

[PepperBlossoms]

I guess one thing is that with the relationship wall, it was probably more of not having a durable wall in the first place and then I built one and the experience of not having one was so bad that I made it

kinda like - the experience of sleeping outside all night can be so dangerous that we make homes

so the experience can be so bad of godness that we go back to human with a wall around us

it is almost as if the wall is indeed physical as we shun things. we physically keep away as if the wall is keeping us away. like how a value system builds a wall and shuns other things out mentally but also because it does that it physically shuns them too

BUTTT I could also easily tear the wall down or put up a door and walk through the wall - the wall could be flimsy in a way - not much keeping it together (if that is how I imagine it)

[Egzoset]

Religion (if not endoctrination):  opium of the poor...