Posted September 5, 2021 I've just graduated, moved out, got a solid job making good money, now I'm living on my own in a new town. I know I'm socially not as developed as I need to be and that's where most of my efforts are going just now, the new town thing makes that especially tough. I've been socialising quite a bit, had some great experiences. Covid restrictions finally lifted enough for nightclubs to open. I still haven't made any solid friends here yet so I've been going alone so far and had an absolute blast the first time I went to this particular place. However I went back again this Friday and had a really shitty experience. Initially I was denied entry because I was on my own, despite going there alone before. I then found a couple girls round the corner who said they'd pretend they knew me and got in, I never saw them again after that but it felt great at the time. I was there for a couple hours, spoke to a bunch of people, danced etc. then I started talking to another pair of girls, it was loud and they couldn't hear me so I cupped my hand around one of their ears and spoke into that, just some some basic shit about if they were having a good night. No more than 30 seconds total. They clearly weren't interested so I just moved on. I didn't think anything of it, really, I'm pretty sure that's normalish club behaviour but it was the most forward thing I did. After that, I saw one of them talking to a bouncer and pointing directly at me while I was just having a good time dancing. Next thing I know he was telling me I had to leave. I don't know why but this has actually made me feel like total shit. I know it's relatively inconsequential, but I feel unbelievably guilty and confused because I don't really know exactly what I did wrong, but clearly something. The idea of being seen as creepy seems to hit something really deep inside me, I really hate being perceived that way. And being denied entry for being alone in retrospect reinforces this in my mind. It makes me feel like a creep somehow, or like I'm an outsider, like I'm doing something wrong. I'm really just venting because this has been playing on my mind a whole lot over the weekend. I'm definitely overthinking it, but if anyone happens to have any insight on anything I've said then I'd appreciate it Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 6, 2021 Dude, stop giving a fuck. It's a club. You guys need to seriously toughen up. Stop wasting mental energy on pointless things. I've been kicked out of clubs. It doesn't matter. You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 6, 2021 (edited) 1 hour ago, Leo Gura said: I've been kicked out of clubs. It doesn't matter. Hard to imagine. But that's hot. You really did? Aren't you the one who would quietly leave? Edited September 6, 2021 by Preety_India INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues Cleared out ignore list today. .. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 6, 2021 @Preety_India 6 minutes ago, Preety_India said: But that's hot How so? Btw why the fuck would someone get kicked out of a club for talking to people as long as it is done in a respectful way. It defies all logic. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 6, 2021 (edited) 15 minutes ago, Karmadhi said: @Preety_India How so? Btw why the fuck would someone get kicked out of a club for talking to people as long as it is done in a respectful way. It defies all logic. Guy. You need to be a girl to know what's hot for a girl. Lmao Why does a guy get kicked out of a club? Maybe because that guy is too hot for the club to handle. Go figure it yourself instead of asking a random girl online like some noob. You might as well ask me how to paint nails while you're at it! Edited September 6, 2021 by Preety_India INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues Cleared out ignore list today. .. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 6, 2021 @Preety_India 39 minutes ago, Preety_India said: o figure it yourself instead of asking a random girl online like some noob Forcing myself to get kicked out of a club seems like a great idea! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 6, 2021 Just now, Karmadhi said: @Preety_India Forcing myself to get kicked out of a club seems like a great idea! Then do it. At least you'll be doing something instead of just talking all the time like you do!! INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues Cleared out ignore list today. .. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 6, 2021 47 minutes ago, Preety_India said: Maybe because that guy is too hot for the club to handle. Or maybe that guy needs to stop being a douche and learn to be chill as ice hrhrhtewgfegege Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 6, 2021 @Roy Or maybe because people these days are way too paranoid and scared. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 6, 2021 Just now, Roy said: Or maybe that guy needs to stop being a douche and learn to be chill as ice How would you know exactly if he was being a douche? Maybe he was just being a pickup God and was misunderstood? Maybe some snowflake got triggered for nothing? Maybe some woman with botched fake tits(lmao ) wanted to take out her frustration with her exes on him and decided to go apeshit on him for nothing, to satisfy her pitiful ego? There are too many maybes. INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues Cleared out ignore list today. .. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 6, 2021 1 minute ago, Preety_India said: How would you know exactly if he was being a douche? We aren't talking about the OP. We are talking about a hypothetical person you brought up, of a "hot guy". >> 53 minutes ago, Preety_India said: Why does a guy get kicked out of a club? Maybe because that guy is too hot for the club to handle. hrhrhtewgfegege Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 6, 2021 (edited) @Roy @Roy Betting my last dollar and even my last penny that you have never been to a club. A hot guy who enters a club doesn't care too much and a hot naughty girl when she sees him doesn't mind anything at all For all of this to work, the girl needs to be naughty enough. Nuns don't make it to the disco. (personal experience) Edited September 6, 2021 by Preety_India INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues Cleared out ignore list today. .. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 6, 2021 6 minutes ago, Preety_India said: Betting my last dollar and even my last penny that you have never been to a club. lol well I have? Outgrew that scene pretty quick. Still it's pretty obvious though if you get kicked out from a club it's because you were probably being a twat. And no it's not cool, girls will think you're a loser. Keep in mind they are on the INSIDE of a club. They aren't going to leave alcohol and music to go outside and fawn over a dude. They will be inside laughing and wondering what he did for about 3 seconds before going back to dancing. hrhrhtewgfegege Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 6, 2021 (edited) 10 minutes ago, Roy said: lol well I have? Outgrew that scene pretty quick. Still it's pretty obvious though if you get kicked out from a club it's because you were probably being a twat. And no it's not cool, girls will think you're a loser. Keep in mind they are on the INSIDE of a club. They aren't going to leave alcohol and music to go outside and fawn over a dude. They will be inside laughing and wondering what he did for about 3 seconds before going back to dancing. This might be the case if the guy is being an outright douche in most cases. But in some cases it's just not that way. Plenty of times when dudes get kicked out for no reason, ask men,ask Leo.. Do you mean to say Leo was being a douche? I don't think so. Edited September 6, 2021 by Preety_India INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues Cleared out ignore list today. .. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 6, 2021 I've certainly been a giant douche at times. Although you have to understand, when you go to as many clubs as I've been to, all sorts of random crazy stuff happens. It's like rolling dice. You'll see crazy things happen at clubs if you go out a lot. For example, one time a girl accused me of grabbing her ass, when I didn't. Then she told her husband to beat me up. Random stuff like that will just happen if you go out long enough. It does not have to make any logical sense. You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 6, 2021 (edited) 7 hours ago, Leo Gura said: Dude, stop giving a fuck. It's a club. You guys need to seriously toughen up. Stop wasting mental energy on pointless things. I've been kicked out of clubs. It doesn't matter. This really is what I needed to hear, thank you. 6 hours ago, Karmadhi said: Btw why the fuck would someone get kicked out of a club for talking to people as long as it is done in a respectful way. It defies all logic. I mean I'd had a few drinks, it's entirely possible I was giving off generally bad energy without realising even if I didn't do anything tangibly bad. It's not entirely about what you say. I also understand what @blueberries said about girls being particularly on guard in clubs if they've had bad experiences. And venues are going to side with girls in 99% of situations regardless of what actually happens anyway. 5 hours ago, Roy said: Or maybe that guy needs to stop being a douche and learn to be chill as ice That's the plan @Preety_India it sure doesn't feel hot, that's for sure. Maybe if you got kicked out for chatting up the girl the manager was hitting on, or for stealing shots from the shot girls' trays or some other shit like that you'd have a case here hehehe. Not for some random girl thinking you're a creep and reporting you 1 hour ago, Leo Gura said: I've certainly been a giant douche at times. Although you have to understand, when you go to as many clubs as I've been to, all sorts of random crazy stuff happens. It's like rolling dice. You'll see crazy things happen at clubs if you go out a lot. For example, one time a girl accused me of grabbing her ass, when I didn't. Then she told her husband to beat me up. Random stuff like that will just happen if you go out long enough. It does not have to make any logical sense. @Leo Gura This is what excites me about clubs, I like the idea of letting loose and rolling the dice, see what the fuck happens. Turns out when the dice don't roll in your favour it feels bad, who knew. Two questions: Did you get beat up? Have you ever been rejected entry into a club for being alone or any other stupid reasons? Edited September 6, 2021 by something_else Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 6, 2021 @something_else it feels hot because it means you had the balls to do something that got you kicked out, something that most guys won't even try. If it's sexual harassment, that's really bad. But if it's something like fighting another dude over a girl or getting into a brawl to save a girl from getting hurt, omg that's hot. Only few men have the balls to do something radical in social situations. Most guys act like pussies anyway. INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues Cleared out ignore list today. .. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 6, 2021 1 hour ago, something_else said: @Leo Gura This is what excites me about clubs, I like the idea of letting loose and rolling the dice, see what the fuck happens. Turns out when the dice don't roll in your favour it feels bad, who knew. Two questions: Did you get beat up? Never touched by a guy. I got punched in the face by a girl once. Drawing blood. I got clawed in the neck by a drunk girl once. Drawing lots of blood. Still have a scar on my neck from that one. Quote Have you ever been rejected entry into a club for being alone or any other stupid reasons? A bouncer once pushed me out of the door as I was walking in. He didn't like me because I was stealing girls on the street in front of his bar. You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 6, 2021 2 minutes ago, Leo Gura said: Never touched by a guy. I got punched in the face by a girl once. Drawing blood. I got clawed in the neck by a drunk girl once. Drawing lots of blood. Still have a scar on my neck from that one. Eww so bad. I feel sorry for your neck. Touchwood. I hope you never suffer like this again. You are so delicate. INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues Cleared out ignore list today. .. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 6, 2021 7 hours ago, Karmadhi said: @Preety_India How so? Btw why the fuck would someone get kicked out of a club for talking to people as long as it is done in a respectful way. It defies all logic. Oh, its very usual, you clearly havent gone out a lot to nightclubs. You can get kicked out just because. Fear is just a thought Share this post Link to post Share on other sites