Gonna drop things here

[Human Mint]

Just that. Nothing to say right now but I wanted to create this space for future observations. To stay in theme.

 

Rules for a better approach:

• Expressing without judging myself
• If I want to write multiple things in one day, drop it in a single-day post

 

Intention:

• To develop honesty
• To share some part of my life
• To manifest

 

Edited August 27, 2021 by Human Mint

[Human Mint]

Starting with this gem

Edited August 27, 2021 by Human Mint

[Human Mint]

P.S: Feel free to interact in the thread if you want to.

4 pm:

Lp Construction.

So far it's going pretty well.

I have fixed my sleep and my diet. Got the suplements and nootropics I wanted, to enhance the LP construction. They are working well, and i am not even taking them daily. Just in the trying fase. Ah, and also i am doing intermitent fasting, starting at 10 am with a breakfast, and finishing at 6pm.

I am bulding my kitchen so I can be more organized and independent with the food I eat.

I also established a solid exercise routine and, in paralel, I have crafted calistenics rings out of wood. Now I have to build the metal bar to put it in the wall. Waiting the belt strap to arrive also.

Doing cold showers as well. Currently in the day 3. Building my way to the extreme cold. My skinny body can't handle full cold yet.

Working in these habits is crucial to keep moving foward in this process of setting my LP. The primal foundation.

I am working in a musical project with a friend, where we have established the intention to get better. The intention to work as much as a professional. There is no other secret than to add hours and hours in a practice that is refined day by day. Yes, I am reading "The art of war". It resonates with me.

But this project is a side project that we do 2 times per week. What I need to focus on now is to start making small bets. Tiny musical project that I work on everyday. Probably gonna start with just 30-60 minutes a day just to build the inertia.

It seems that I am going perfect, but I have my personal attachments as well. So I am trying accomplish all of this by supplanting old bad habits with new good ones.

7:41 pm:

Yesterday I met with 2 fellow musicians to play some shit. It was inspiring. Not only musicaly, but socially too.

 

Edited August 29, 2021 by Human Mint

[Human Mint]

On 30/8/2021 at 8:33 AM, tuckerwphotography said:

Read the follow excerpt from Susanne Cook-Greuter and sense (with your somatic gut brain not just rational mind) how much you resonate with it.

http://www.cook-greuter.com/9 levels of increasing embrace update 1 07.pdf 

"The Autonomous Stage 5: (Strategist)

The Autonomous stage represents an enlarged fourth person perspective which places the individual’s experience into the context of particular worldviews and within the totality of a person’s lifetime. With the expanded time frame and wider social networks, Autonomous persons can perceive systemic patterns or long-term trends and are often valued for that “strategic” capacity. Cognitively they have a general systems view of reality, that is, they can comprehend multiple interconnected systems of relationships and processes.

Autonomous persons realize that they may notice different conflicting aspects or polarities in themselves at different times and in different context, but -- unlike Individualists, who may despair about ever knowing who they really are -- Autonomous persons are capable of “owning” and integrating many disparate parts of themselves. This includes integrating previously compartmentalized sub-identities. The crucial new capacity is to realize one’s power to generate meaning and to tell a new story. This is possible now precisely because one understands that meaning is an interpretation we bring to experience. We all tell stories about what is happening all the time. Autonomous persons consciously commit to actively create a meaningful life for themselves and for others through self-determination and self-actualization within constantly shifting contexts. They posses a relatively strong, autonomous self that is both differentiated and well integrated. This includes the capacity to see and accept paradox and tolerate ambiguity.

Expanded 4th person perspective:
Self in embedded in history and multiple cultural contexts.

Autonomous persons become fine-tuned to their own psychological well-being. Theirs is a different emotional tone than that of Individualists, much less cynical and distrusting. Relativism changes into personal commitment and responsibility for creating one’s own meaning. Persons at this stage are attuned to their inner workings. They are now capable of rediscovering and owning parts of the self which have previously been disowned, because they seemed too confusing or too threatening. The shadow side of the self can be acknowledged to a greater degree and therefore a new integration and wholeness is possible. Although they experience role conflicts and dilemmas strongly, they recognize that these are inevitable and that ambivalent feelings are natural. Unlike those at even later stages, Autonomous persons try very hard to keep their act together and to come across as reasonable and mature. They feel themselves responsible for being able to orchestrate among conflicting needs and different subidentities and generally appear balanced.

Even more than at the Individualist stage, experiences are accepted for their immediate qualities. Distressing emotions become more tolerable, they can be acknowledged within oneself and shared with others. Autonomous persons have access to a logical system which can integrate psycho-logically paradoxical elements, therefore less energy needs to be spent on “defending.”

Realm: Society and others with similar convictions and principles

Time frame: own “history, lifetime” Cognition: 5b, metasystematic operations;

General systems thinker

Preoccupations: own development, self- actualization, self-fulfillment; processes

Positive equilibration: well-balanced body/mind integration; autonomous, tolerant, insightful, growth-oriented; high self-esteem; overarching principles

Truth: can be approximated; higher development is better since more complex arguments carry more weight than feeble ones. Higher is more adequate for functioning in an ever more complex global theatre. There are qualitative differences!

This in turn, allows them to be more tolerant and spontaneous than adults at conventional stages. Self and others are accepted as complex human beings with both good and bad traits. Exchange with others makes it possible to get in touch with aspects of the self or of one’s behavior one would otherwise tend to overlook. Good feedback makes one aware of what one is defending or blind to. One needs the caring presence of others to become the most one can be. Thus, others are vital to one’s well-being because only through a dynamic and intimate exchange with them can one gain deeper self-knowledge and wisdom. Mutual interdependence with other human beings is inevitable and experienced with awe and an awareness of one’s responsibility towards them. Autonomous persons can sometimes experience non-possessive love (or being love) because of this profound appreciation of other people as mirrors of themselves.

The greatest fear of Autonomous persons is to feel that they have not fulfilled their potential, or to have failed to observe those universal principles they value deeply (justice, tolerance, dignity of all people). Depression is often based on loss of courage, loss of self-agency and guilt for not having fulfilled one’s unique human promise. When using defenses, healthy Autonomous persons use mostly mature ones: suppression, altruism, humor, anticipation. When they use less mature defenses, they are able to forgive themselves and move on. “Right now I need to be like this, but I intend to act more maturely again when appropriate."

Inner processes are complex and demanding to observe. As much as Autonomous persons need others, they also need privacy, time for self-reflection. The self is experienced as unfolding and constantly reappraised. Watching this “unfolding” of things is one of the main satisfactions at this stage. One’s precious life work consists in trying “to become the most one can be.” Personal growth, self-actualization and self-fulfillment are chief desires at this stage. Others are seen as the actors in their life dramas, which are equally fascinating to Autonomous persons. Wanting to help others grow is one of the strongest motivators for Autonomous persons. Psychologists, coaches and consultants often inhabit this stage, as do effective executives and leaders. When this need to have others “become the most they can be” encounters resistance, Autonomous persons may feel impatient with others’ slow development and frustrated with their “unwillingness” to grow despite their efforts. This is likely the central flaw of this stage. Autonomous persons tend to be those most convinced that higher development is better and should be fostered at all costs. Higher is believed to be better because the more differentiated and the more autonomous an individual becomes, the more one can claim that one has an objective (non-distorted) and realistic self-identity (Kegan, 1982). One can claim an authentic, truthful self. Authenticity, is therefore an important value in the Autonomous value repertoire.

Many Autonomous persons see life as an open-ended journey. They believe that there is no predetermined way to follow for all human beings. Each individual has to find and create his/her own life style and is responsible for his or her self-fulfillment. Autonomous persons are interested in psychological questions and how to come to terms with inner conflict. Unlike people at the conventional stages, seeking therapy, advice, or consulting from others, is not seen as a weakness, but seen as a necessity. Autonomous persons have faith in their own and other people’s capacity to make meaning out of messes and difficulties. They can construe their own personal meaning without having to impose it on all others. They may also invite others’ solutions to conflict and respect their needs for autonomy. Sometimes Autonomous persons find the work to make a living and other ordinary constraints of life stultifying. They would prefer to enjoy their passions on their own terms. If leading an organization to greatness is one of those passions, it may be a fortuitous match.

Autonomous persons may genuinely feel principled anger and righteous indignation towards the injustices of the world. They will stand up against society to express their personal convictions or to uphold their principles. Their anger does not usually seek a victim. They live their personal conviction according to self-evaluated, internal standards. “To walk the talk” becomes an expression of one’s moral character and authenticity. Irreconcilable role conflicts are felt deeply. Some Autonomous persons become charismatic moral leaders. When they defend what they believe to be a worthy cause, they often disregard negative consequences for themselves. But they may also be overly forceful with their convictions especially when they are fueled by principled anger. The combination of charisma and moral conviction can be a powerful negative force if not kept in check.

The greater awareness of their inner depth also allows Autonomous persons to use dreams, fantasy, and imagination much more freely than persons at earlier stages. Their thoughts are allowed to take off and creativity is released. Their imagination is no longer constrained by logic and convention. Thinking outside the box is how one addresses issues. Because Autonomous persons are aware of human frailty as part of the human condition, they often express existential humor and their irony has a lighter touch than before.

Impulse control, character development: Self-evaluated, internalized standards. Behavior becomes an expression of one’s moral principles. Toleration of multiple points of view. Concern with conflicting roles, duties, principles.

Interpersonal style: One takes responsibility for relationships, but also desires autonomy. Relationships seen in terms of inevitable mutual interdependence. Toleration of others’ solutions to conflict. Respect for others’ autonomy. Non-hostile, existential humor.

Cognitive level: time frame and social context again expanded. Capacity to see and embrace some paradox and contradiction. Toleration of ambiguity. Broad scope of thought. Perception of self as regulator of a self-system with interdependent parts within a larger by context.

Conscious preoccupation: Concerned with individuality and self-fulfillment. Interested in the psychology of self. Coming to terms with conflicting needs.

Chief anxiety: not to fulfill one’s potentiality, to neglect those principles of justice, tolerance etc. one holds dear, loss of courage. Impatience with others’ slow development, and “unwillingness” to grow.

Internal dimension: One tries to make sense of oneself in terms of inner conflict and “polarities”. One tries to integrate into a coherent whole what one sees as one’s different selves at different times in different circumstances.

Defenses: Mostly mature ones: suppression, altruism, humor, anticipation. When using less mature defenses, one can be forgiving and understanding towards self. “Right now I need to be like this, but I will be able to act more maturely again later”.

Representatives: charismatic individuals who are ready for personal sacrifice in order to defend through personal example the moral principles they believe in.

Language clues: Autonomous persons use a complex, flexible syntax; with a wide array of topics and concerns. They try to do justice to the complexity of life in their verbal expressions. They try to present a coherent exposition of their thinking and themselves. They use differentiated psychological vocabulary and understand circular causality in human relations. “Identity, growth, higher principles, self-fulfillment” are favorite terms and topics."

Luffy, the character in my profile photo, is yellow stage. With a necessary red application due to the context he is in (pirates), but never going to it's extremes. At least not in the first season.

I like how most of the characters are very congruent with what they say andt act inside the One Piece world. Mostly from a very selfish position though.

Edited September 1, 2021 by Human Mint

[Human Mint]

10:37

I want a strong mind able to be in a creative mood for long periods of time. Strong to resist hard work. Discipline and effortless concentration. Free from vicious needs.

With a proper balance of gentleness and effort I'll be able to transform my character. A healthy one. The key component is time and consistance. Proper practices.

Even going for an adventure can bring me closer to that. Like the one Darwin did.

I would like to go to psychology sessions as well, to address insecurities and fear. I am a bit insecure about it (of course), but that may indicate that is the correct move. I do not like to be vulnerable to others. Not face to face. It sucks (not the being vulnerable part, but the feeling of insecurity and fear). That's why I want to develop trust with a professional.

If things progress there, it will do nothing but positively impact my life. And showing up is as necessary as watering your plants everyday.

 

23:12

Steping into the learning state.

Building my way up to that actitud towards life: of learning. I just want it. I know it is a pearl. I have experienced it before. Yet, I don't have the habit anymore. I seem to be very lazy. JABITS

Edited September 2, 2021 by Human Mint

[Human Mint]

9:00

I need to get a mentor. I already have one in mind. I need to tear down the notion of "I already know" and to act by the notion of apprentice.

 

22:46

This whole shit is laborious

Edited September 3, 2021 by Human Mint

[Human Mint]

40- Concepts: Patience

"If a warrior is to succeed at anything, the success must come gently, with a great deal of effort but with no stress or obsession." — Carlos Castaneda

 

Yes, the mind is capable of rearranging itself in inconceivable ways. What it only need: must believe to be the case for it to change. And to give it proper food.

Edited September 4, 2021 by Human Mint

[Human Mint]

Its 23:40, about to go to bed and today i've realized something important: The fruits one wants come from the work spread over time. Not from an isolated moment of hard work; an attitude I have deeply ingrained.

This kind of teachings are easy to know. In my case, virtually all my life i've been knowing this one, but I'm just beginning to integrate it.

Plus i am also mastering the art of cutting off the infamous distraction habit. For example, in order to sit for an hour in the morning tomorrow (and from now on), i have put a lot of signals with clothes and written sheets pointing to my meditation mat so when i wake up tomorrow i won't have chances to forget about it. A sheet on the mat says: ¡Green tea and let's meditate!

Objective: To meditate every day one hour in the morning after waking up and one hour before bed.

I keep taking cold showers every day. A lot of improvement made. I found the following quote over there and really liked it, it expresses what i feel about this discipline: "Feels like I understood the trick with cold showers again. It is about opening up to fully and embracing the resistance instead of clenching ones teeth and just pushing through." From "My meditation Journal" of @Thittato

Edited September 10, 2021 by Human Mint

[Human Mint]

 

[Human Mint]

On 14/9/2021 at 8:33 AM, Nahm said:

@blessedlion1993

The difference between focus on escaping X vs creating Y seems subtle but is not. It is actually thee difference. 

Focusing on escaping is focusing on the absence of, or the no longer experiencing of, what you don’t want. Not that I’m trying to push any specific avenue, but the stress doesn’t come from the managing, but from the lens, from what and the way one is interpreting & focusing. 

 

 

 

[Human Mint]

On 27/9/2021 at 0:47 PM, Moksha said:

It is about focusing attention on the meditation object (breath, inner body, etc.), without being distracted by the mind. Thoughts and emotions come and go, but they lose their gravitational pull. The mind is seen for what it is, and its neuroticism becomes apparent. You no longer identify with it.

 

On 27/9/2021 at 5:08 PM, Moksha said:

Meditation, when mastered, is pure awareness and spaciousness. There is nothing to be tricked by. Thoughts, including even the thought of "you", are clearly seen as such.

Meditation enables them to go
Deeper and deeper into consciousness,
From the world of words to the world of thoughts,
Then beyond thoughts to wisdom in the Self.

- Katha 1.3.13

 

Meditation quotes.

[Human Mint]

Huge addiction backlash on sunday, smoked almost a bundle of cigarettes and drank a lot of coffee. Today i am doing pretty well though, meaning i feel good... More clearminded for some reason.

 

[Human Mint]

I want a lot of things but results doesn't come the way i would like. I am not putting the proper amount of effort. That's clear. I am tired of dead ends though, that's why much often i give up activities that will technically improve my life.

I need proper questions for guidance. I need to take so much more action so then i can contemplate againg, deeper, receiving a genuine juice.

God dammit. I am tired of not having the consistency to discover things thanks to my efforts, savoring the growth.

This is a damn orange thing. It's a great blockage.

I am not giving up the thing i first posted though. That's the real shit. You know, fixing diet, sleep, socialize more, etc. The well known "failing and trying again" mechanics.

It's difficult when you come from a place of lots of addictions. Gaining momentun requires good work: strategy + action.

LP: I really engage with it when i do sit down and work on it. That's a good sign.

Edited October 8, 2021 by Human Mint

[Human Mint]

On 6/10/2021 at 7:25 PM, Nahm said:

For a relative glimpse of how fast you been goin, watch a tree grow. 

 

[Human Mint]

A lot of anger arose these days, such anger. I hope it is for the better. I don't harm anybody, and that's something i am really proud of. Although nobody really likes when you are with that anger, it's authentic in a way. I don't particularly want to infuse fear. And what amazes me is that people do not always fear rage. It's a signal for the close ones to step in with authenticity.

An evolving process. What teaching does emerge in the middle of all this? Simply to trust more emotions. For me, that's intuition. It is different from trusting other people words, and to rely on them. It's better to rely in one's emotion, feel them. Logic is not more precise than feeling. Even when feeling emotions means to punch a wall.

Edited October 13, 2021 by Human Mint

[Human Mint]

I am failing in making a habit managable. Consistency is the goal, and what leads to consistency are simple things:

• Chosing a personal valuable activity to master.
• Small and simple actions every day.
• Investing focus and time in it.

That's pretty much it. Engagement requires effort. I am failing in consistency because i run away from it for dumb reasons.

Its quite an exercise to drop the "how to" preocupation. It is liberating.

 

 

Edited November 23, 2021 by Human Mint

[Human Mint]

An Orange thing

"An Orange would perform much better when surrounded by like-minded people with the same/similar values and vision." Someone in the forum.

 

I am realizing now that this is a grand recurring theme in my life right now. Meeting with people that are like-minded and to work together, but with a cold relationship; i.e Orange. I enjoy it so much, and there is a ton of growth in there.

Edited December 7, 2021 by Human Mint

[Human Mint]

Red moment now

Something red that i am still mastering: to put in words what i want in a social circle. I can do it, but i don't feel so confortable. There is a fear: waiting for other's aproval hits me hard. So the red thing to do would be to stick like a bitch with my thoughts on what i want.

Example 1: i am in a group, i have an idea, proceed to share the idea like a leader. Look to peoples eyes when i speak, but sticking to my idea, because what's important in the moment is my idea. And ALSO: to listen to their opinion, genuily. But this last step can only be done after i express MY opinion without problem, efortless. If who I'm talking to doesn't listen to my idea, then I won't listen to theirs. If that's the case i need also say something like -"hey, you need to listen to me if you want me to listen to you, basic science. Let me repeat myself (and proceed to repeat the words)"

Example 2: i am in a group or with a teacher, i have a difficulty learning something, my problem becomes priority number one to resolve. I ask the necessary questions relentlessly, and until i don't learn i am not ok.

This is very foundational, you learn this in primary, but somehow i am so fucking rusty in this department. Lack of application.

This does concern me because in the activities I attend i have troubles with it.

Application step now: to walk in with this intent in mind. Without thinking it too much, but somehow well orchestrated

TRIAL AND ERROR TRIAL AND ERROR TRIAL AND ERROR TRIAL AND ERROR TRIAL AND ERROR

[Human Mint]

Question I would like to answer:

¿What things can i do to guide my learning process in any field?

This question is based on the fact that every time I want to learn I fail in the attempt because i cannot generate a proper snowball effect. I try with sheer brute force and that does not work. And the only way I can get into a learning flow is if I inhale a good chunk of marijuana, but that doesn't look proper to me. I am going to develop methods that does not require any weed. The learning process is such a precious thing that it is worth experiencing. Hand on hand with creativity.

Right know i am starting to read a book called "The fifth discipline" by Peter M. Senge, which seems to takle this content. I will probably post more of it in the future.

There are already techniques and methods that i've been using all of my life but now the work would be to make them conscious and to put into practice.

Edited January 12, 2022 by Human Mint

[Human Mint]

Amazing place