Hi,  Last monday evening I felt really dead inside. Like I couldn't be bothered to respond to anything, to feel anything. Just empty emotionally, the opposite of what people mean when they say someone is "full of life" or "exuberant". I'm of course speaking in relative terms here, not referring to capital D Death or E Emptiness. So, normally when I feel like I am suffering or experiencing dissatisfaction of any kind more than usual, I just sort of investigate the raw, direct sensate experience that convinces me there is a separate self that experiences this suffering. This makes the suffering dissolve a lot normally. But last monday I couldn't find anything, but was still suffering. This probably messed with some perverted spiritual ego kind of control-fantasy of being able to reduce suffering at will when I feel like it. And it also just felt really strange.  I remembered this book called "Reichian therapy" which had an exercise where you look in the mirror as if you are looking at a stranger, so I did that, and that helped a lot. It gave me some feedback on how I felt, I guess. It made me feel more alive. I have done Reichian therapy every day now since tuesday, which helps.  I should mention I am 19 years old and have been meditating for the last two years, the 16 months of which I meditated and did Kriya yoga more than 3 hours a day on average, roughly. I put in so much energy into meditation and need to relax more, so I'm focussing more on relaxing and concentration types of meditation instead of insight meditation. Insight meditation creates more "fleeting" and unfamiliar and strange perceptions which can be a little ungrounding. So it is good to express myself into some form like writing or exercise, as to consume form instead of letting form consume me, so to speak.  Since tuesday morning I feel more calm and clear and as if my Real Self is shining through more clearly, but I still feel like I'm "picking up the pieces" and I'm still in the chaos of dissidentified thoughts, both of which monday evening was a more extreme version of, but this sort of chaos is not new.  I have been reading the book "Mastering the Core Teachings of the Buddha", which has a lot of maps and stages which I haven't familiarized myself with. I should probably just do that.  Anyway, I know this post is a little unclear and paints a rather incomplete picture. I'm just looking for some advice or anything that can help me navigate this. Grounding is important, but at the same time I want to progress spiritually. These two definetly are not totally at odds with each other but I'm still confused about it. Can someone shed some light on that as well, please?