Belly of the Whale - Hero's Journey

[Ya know]

I'm currently in the belly of the whale and encountering my egoic limitations.

For me it has been Pride - love of my ego at the cost of denigrating others, infatuation with appearance, perceived abilities and out working other people to make myself feel better by comparison. Essentially being competitive instead of collaborative.

Pride is a strange sin because on the surface it feels like you are doing everything right, and in a way you are but it's for the wrong reasons. Eventually they become evident and handicap your progress significantly. The energy you emanate is so off putting for other people and they resent you for it. You create envy and animosity in others at the cost of inflating your ego. 

An example is there is nothing wrong with exercising - but if you are training twice a day to look better than everyone else is that a good idea? 

Why do you feel the need to upload shirtless photos of yourself? To prove how good looking you are.

Christian literature has a lot on pride and it's negativity. Lucifer's fall is a great one. Taking credit for Gods work and wanting to be a God instead of surrender and appreciation. You literally cast yourself out of the kingdom of heaven to rule hell - i.e dopamine, fleeting adoration, validation that will never satisfy you.

It's been a bitter pill to swallow but I'm emerging out of it now. 3 days does seem to be the number.

Surrender was the most useful tool. I read a bunch of counter intuitive moves being useful in this situation and it was for me. Typically I'd get caught in the paradigm of doing - instead I surrendered to consciousness and allowed whatever emotions to be released through feeling them fully. 

 

Initiation is the next step - so I'm presuming that after total surrender of my ego consciousness will rise out of the ashes and then I will be able to face the trials with the strength of the universe on my side. I'm looking forward to it.

 

So for discussion - What were your experiences in the belly of the whale? What limitations did you have to overcome? What strategies did you use?

What was the next phase for you like? What was the difference between before and after?