The inherit neediness in day game

[Vrubel]

8 minutes ago, Esilda said:

these just seem like generalisations to me. Men don't get married just for sex for example and women don't have sex purely for intimacy.

I stated the core biological needs of both sexes. Yes, it's a generality but a pretty solid one. Your examples don't disprove this. 

 

15 minutes ago, Esilda said:

I only really go for guys that look like they can connect on a deep level. I have standards around this.

This is what all girls say, it's your core need.

Normal women are not prostitutes, they all have standards and need a connection in order to have sex. A guy facilitates this connection by being attractive to you. 

[Esilda]

@Vrubel there's plenty of guys that want connection first and you can say the same for promiscuous women where they don't care as much about connection. 

Does connection mean beta and sex priority just alpha? It would be icky if we devolved there.

[Vrubel]

17 minutes ago, Esilda said:

@Vrubel there's plenty of guys that want connection first and you can say the same for promiscuous women where they don't care as much about connection. 

All guys want connection but connection alone is not going to satisfy his core need. A woman can be lustful and promiscuous but at the end of the day, her core need is intimacy/connection.

13 minutes ago, Esilda said:

Does connection mean beta and sex priority just alpha? It would be icky if we devolved there.

What? No. If a guy dates a girl and they have sex after a few dates, that means that a sufficiently deep connection was successfully built.
Or if the men and women are clubbing, are horny and go for a one-night-stand this also means a connection was built. Maybe in a short time but maybe that connection was really intense. Of course, there is always the risk of bad sex. 

Edited August 13, 2021 by Vrubel

[Esilda]

@Vrubel okay whatevs. I just don't feel like you're trying to connect with me in this conversation. 

[Farnaby]

@Esilda maybe it's designed that way because it matches how we're wired biologically? Not saying it doesn't work the other way around too, but if tinder, Instagram, porn, etc., is consumed sooo much, it probably targets needs that are already present in us. 

As soon as I started entering puberty, I started noticing attractive girls more and more. I don't think it's humiliating unless you interpret it that way, it's just how most guys I know function (and I'm pretty sure, based on what I have observed in my family and female friends, many women too).

Most guys I know also want something deeper, but the first thought tends to be: "hot/not hot/not bad"... Sorry if this is hard to accept but it's what I've found in my experience.

[Vrubel]

11 minutes ago, Esilda said:

@Vrubel okay whatevs. I just don't feel like you're trying to connect with me in this conversation. 

Connect? Ouch, I even get rejected when I just try to share my perspective and understanding. 

 

[Esilda]

@Vrubel yeah i totally agree that there are subtle bio triggers that need to be properly mapped that account for and beyond truncated societal views on male compared to female in their social dynamics, its an ewey religion with false tape guarding us from the truth. These platforms shape human behaviour as well. 

I just want the guys I date to have more awareness. I get it, men have hormones, we all do, they make us think thoughts that we didn't put there but is sex really the end for them? What's their purpose in their life, their vision with me? Just to "get their's". It's so impulsively casino, why are we endorsing the casino of sexuality? It makes no sense for us to collectively agree on that as a "thing" we work towards spreading between us all. As a self actualised female, I want my man to be self actualised. 

[Esilda]

@Vrubel I'm just not feeling you is all. I need to feel you more. 

[Javfly33]

On 11/8/2021 at 9:10 PM, Vrubel said:

It is not an excuse, I am planning on continuing (I even hired coaching for the coming weekend).

It’s just when I day game I come into this state of consciousness that is “seeking/scouting” almost plotting. As in contrast to being energetically centered, secure and deeply strong as whenever I am just running errands.

I was asking for advise to overcome this issue and ideally combine my attractive non-needy state with the scouting (more needy) aspect of actively day gaming.

 

I am extremely introverted so day game is pretty much my only hope. 

Well that is because doing pickup is neurotic and ego-stage red oriented. Dont expect to feel like a Sage glowing on your third chakra while "scouting" for Girls downtown.

But if thats where you are, thats where you are. You have to burn stage doing It, not avoiding It.

[Jacob Morres]

8 hours ago, Javfly33 said:

doing pickup is neurotic and ego-stage red oriented

well technically pickup can be red through yellow (i dont know what turquoise is so i dont wanna comment that). 

Edited August 14, 2021 by Jacob Morres

[Eternity]

Wow, it seems so odd to me to read posts where guys are putting so much study and effort into the whole dating thing.  It sounds so desperate.  I'm not gonna get into statistics.  If that's your groove go ahead and look, but you better not post about it.  There are ways that these studies can be slanted one way or the other and that the researcher can be prejudiced without realizing it.  Maybe it's because I'm married but I just have no interest in looking up stats and I wouldn't base my behavior in social situations on them.  You have to put yourself into situations you may not be comfortable with, but you can't become  a tennis star by reading a book, you have to do actual hands on practicing.  Why don't you look up a list of famous stars who were real womanizers and also short.  There were and are some hollywood actors who were quite short and still women were after them like white on rice.  I just binge watched a dutch made t.v. series where the lead barely came up to the top of his female counterpart's head and yet he was soooo hot.  I can't tell you how he managed to portray so much sex appeal but I was wishing I could speak dutch and lived in Holland (only a day dream, I lived in Germany several years close to the Dutch border so buzzing over there on a day trip was no big deal, but...I didn't care for the people all that much.  Besides I'm married.)  Anyways, this actor probably started off as just a regular dude, but he's had acting lessons, so he can exude sexiness at the drop of a hat . In fact  all actors, at least the good ones can do the same.  Who knows.  Acting is a skill, so it can be learned.  You could do some online courses and learn it.  All you're doing when you go out looking for a girl is acting a part.  You don't need much, or to change your natural features if you can act the role you want to and you know how.  Go for it!

[Javfly33]

11 hours ago, Jacob Morres said:

well technically pickup can be red through yellow (i dont know what turquoise is so i dont wanna comment that). 

If you do pick Up vibrating at yellow , you aint doing pick Up anymore. You are just having fun and connecting (which of course can get you laid to, But not as guaranteed as more selfish and calculated as stage red/Orange)

[Jacob Morres]

@Javfly33

6 hours ago, Javfly33 said:

If you do pick Up vibrating at yellow , you aint doing pick Up anymore. You are just having fun and connecting (which of course can get you laid to, But not as guaranteed as more selfish and calculated as stage red/Orange)

I can agree with that  

But a lot of things in pickup can be used even at stage yellow. Like for ex: push- pull is basic flirting 

Edited August 15, 2021 by Jacob Morres

[Arcangelo]

On 8/13/2021 at 1:19 AM, Vrubel said:

What you don't understand is this:

If you get approached on the streets by a strong, confident, charming good-looking guy you will go home and tell your girlfriends enthusiastically that this very cute boy approached you and you will probably note that he was tall, dark whatever. (even though it was a more unconscious primal or spiritual-energetic aspect that ultimately won you over). 

Now if you get approached by a dark soul loner with poor social calibration your face will shrivel up in disgust and you'll go home and tell your friends that a maniac approached you. You will then reiterate the importance of #metoo and feminism. 

Strong guy = massive survival value for you therefore everything he does "I accept and think is cute". You will yield massively to him.
Dark soul nerdy guy = "Ewwwwwwww. Please get him away from me."

^Red

Pill

[Arcangelo]

On 8/13/2021 at 1:13 PM, Esilda said:

Does connection mean beta and sex priority just alpha?

Yes

100%

[Javfly33]

11 hours ago, Jacob Morres said:

@Javfly33

I can agree with that  

But a lot of things in pickup can be used even at stage yellow. Like for ex: push- pull is basic flirting 

What is push-pull?

[Esilda]

On 14/08/2021 at 6:04 PM, Eternity said:

Wow, it seems so odd to me to read posts where guys are putting so much study and effort into the whole dating thing.  It sounds so desperate. 

COMPLETELY AGREE!!!!!! 

Dudes just need to find their self fulfilment. They've just been spooked.

[Vrubel]

 

@Esilda Women intuitively understand dating and the dynamics involved, most men are not so socially wired and need to learn this.

You can be a "self-fulfilled" attractive guy but if you are a reclusive and autistic ape when it comes to interacting with women you will remain forever alone. Guys learning the proper dynamics of dating is also for the benefit of girls.  

Maybe you will never meet your dream prince because he has a limiting belief that approaching women is needy and that he is not yet "self-fulfilled" enough.

Again: watch the virtue signaling and projections, Both sexes have their own struggles when it comes to dating, but you don't seem very understanding of the struggles of men

Edited August 17, 2021 by Vrubel

[Javfly33]

On 13/8/2021 at 5:35 PM, Esilda said:

It's so humiliating being a woman in this regard as well, that the first thought a guys thinking is whether he wants to fuck me or not and for so many women that's the clay that they craft their identity out of. Now its the world with instagram, facebook and everything, "does the world want to fuck me or not?", its just such a breath of fresh air when I'm able to meet any person not just a guy who just wants to relate on a human to human level without any preconceptions about the world. It totally strips me of any right or inclination I have as a woman towards personal self awareness when society programs people to categorise me into hot or not so easily like that, its traumatic. @Vrubel I feel this energy in your comment too for how it is for guys, like who inserted Darwin economics hello? But that's what we do and because of that we lose our own identities every time we do. 

Thank you for replying by the way I value your perspective .

Mmm ime the first thought a Guy is thinking is not wheter he wants to fuck you or not. At least thats in my case.

However i think you are confusing different things. One thing is sexual atraction, which doesnt necessarily includes the thought "i want to fuck her" But just... that, an atraction of sexual energy.

And another IS the inclination or curiosity to Connect. This can happen with just a friend, It doesnt even have to be a sexual or intimate partner.

 

 

[Striving for more]

@Esilda

On 8/16/2021 at 4:38 AM, Esilda said:

COMPLETELY AGREE!!!!!! 

Dudes just need to find their self fulfilment. They've just been spooked.

You're completely out of touch with how much harder it is to get laid or get a girlfriend as a guy, plus the fact that men do not have as good social skills, and plenty men have particularly bad social skills, anxiety, don't know how to flirt, lead, interact ... that can only be fixed with hundreds or thousands of approaches.

It sounds so desperate because IT IS desperate lol? ... If you can't get your basic needs fulfilled then you become desperate, that's life. It shouldn't be demonized. 

Better to desperately & swiftly find a solution then "just be self-fullfiled" & be happy. No I'll be self fullilled when I finally achieve my success, like finding a hot girlfriend. 

Don't give dating advice because you're spoilt and out of touch and quite judgmental, you have 0 comprehension of what dating is like for men. 

By the way, I am still desperate and I refuse to deny that "I am desperate" but accept it and focus on solutions ... I will forever be desparate until my needs are fulfilled, until I can have 1-4 hot girlfriends and then focus on other stuff and  therefore not be desperate.

Done with this thread, exiting the forum don't care about your stupid brainlet response.