I feel like a loser all the time. How should I cope with this feeling?  I compare myself with others and I feel like a zero.  Like they have semi perfect lives whereas I'm struggling. Yea stage orange stuff. Feels like I'm in a wrong place.  I feel alone, discarded and humiliated.  My friends who are doing well tend to talk condescendingly so I don't talk to them.  I never feel respected around people.  In my past relationships I felt like being taken advantage of.  I feel emotional but I'm unable to deeply explore these emotions. Like I can't place a finger on what's exactly upsetting me.  Whenever I meet new people, it's usually ends up me turning into a mockery, a doormat, me being used and then promptly dumped when they're done with me. Is this because they look down on me and that's why treat me badly?  I feel like people play social games and I can't keep up with that. I try to fit in but feel like I don't align or get along with all this Stage Orange Society Prestige mindset. I'm just too natural, too free spirited and too real to care about social and egoic behaviors. I like to be by myself cocooned into my own space.  If I mix with people, they discuss wealth, status which I don't like. They want to show off. "I'm doing better than you" mindset.  That makes me feel displaced and more like an outcast and loser.. I don't like competition and competitive people because I don't see realness in it, it feels cheap, shallow, inorganic, materialistic, un-spiritual, unloving, mean and competitive. I find it  unempathetic, "VANITY FAIR," and fake. I look at such people with scorn or disgust because they are so superficial and not having the depth I have. Also I find them mean and contemptuous and condescending which makes me feel very insecure and vulnerable around them, constantly feeling like I have to prove something or compete with them to keep up. Meanwhile they get to be special.  When they look at me, I feel like they're pitying me.  And I absolutely hate their pitying language which feels like empty hollow empathy and just fake hospitality. It feels like behind it they are glad I'm not doing well or simply feeling better at my expense.  When I confront them about how I hate superficial things like expensive vacations or shopping, they hate my guts.  I feel like I have turned into a joke for them to spit at.  When they talk to me I feel manipulated and taken advantage of and it feels like behind all that talk they secretly whisper -" what a dumb girl?" I feel like they absolutely lack empathy on my level and have a complete disregard for my feelings and love to talk about their petty problems when my own problems are so big and severe and their problems are more like soap opera type drama where they don't have to deal with shit.  Yet I constantly feel like they take advantage of my empathy. Like even If I tell them that I have serious stuff to deal with, they come back again and coerce me into talking with them because nobody else will deal with their whining. Or they see me as a safe bet because they don't feel threatened egoically with me, as though a rich mistress is discussing her petty drama with her servant maid, that's how I get treated. And then when I talk about my problems, they immediately wrap up by showing some pity like - "oh, I'm so sorry.." like it doesn't matter that I'm having bigger problems to deal with meanwhile they are complaining about broken glass and brawls in their parties. I feel mocked and used around such people. Later they simply ignore me if I want to text or hang out. Everything is always all about them and their petty daily drama, they aren't crying tears yet they want to pretend like their whole world is collapsing in 2 minutes. Very narcissistic. They use me as their emotional tampon and their issues are so flimsy and trivial. I totally feel like a joke. Sad joke kind of way.  When I ask them how their life is, they tell me it's fun and they are attending another party yet just a few days before they were whining and crying how their whole life was so miserable and awful. Which is a total lie because after all the whining they're focused on expensive self indulgence and enjoying their lives as usual.  They dont share their problems with other people who are doing well, because then it suddenly turns into how their pride will be hurt if they told their problems to others on the same social status. But they have no problem being grumpy and whiny around me because in their eyes I'm someone who is lower in status and not a threat in terms of "keeping up with the Joneses" type of competition..  I'm tired of all such things. It feels like torture.  How to cope around  such people and how to be smart enough to identify such people and throw them out of  my life for good.