Why Can It Be Dangerous, To Know How Things Work?

[bazera]

I am not sure that I've fully expressed what I wanted to say with the title but, anyways..

I have a friend, with whom I had a little conversation the other day. We were talking about the importance of reading books (mostly self-help and positive psychology books), and he was telling me that he was afraid. He said that in the past he has read something, that he didn't know before about himself, and knowing that caused him a trouble in some situations. He described himself as two persons, and said that in some cases, his "evil" self would use the knowledge from the books in a bad way, and he would harm himself. So in short, what he was telling me, was that it is bad for him to read too much, or think too much, because what he finds out about himself, turns out to be damaging in some cases. I was a bit confused, because he wasn't able to give an example of that thing he has read, and he got angry when I asked him to give an example. The other thing is, he says that he knows too much, and that the knowledge is dangerous for him, so he has decided to stop reading about those topics and learning about himself (because again, he things that it's somehow dangerous, and his "evil" self will use the knowledge as some kind of a "weapon"). The other thing is that, we are quite young, both of us are 20 years old, and he has barely read 3-4 books, and he is telling me that he doesn't want other people's theories, and he can find out everything on his own  and that he knows too much, I mean, wtf, It's so hard to talk to such kind of people.

So, what would you tell him, if you were me?

[JeffR1]

Hi bazera. It sounds like your friend may have deep-seated issues within. Perhaps he is afraid to confront the thoughts and feelings around those issues. Maybe this is why he got angry when you asked him for an example. I've found people will talk when they are ready to talk - some may never be ready to talk. I've also found that trying to get people to open up to deep issues can backfire and lead to anger, resentment and other such feelings. Your friend can choose to talk to you or not - that's his choice. So, what would I tell him? I would let him know you are his friend and that you are there for him if he wishes to talk. Beyond that, if you start to become aware of him wanting to harm himself, do your best to get him medical help.

[Leo Gura]

11 hours ago, bazera said:

he has barely read 3-4 books, and he is telling me that he doesn't want other people's theories, and he can find out everything on his own

Ahahahahahahahaaa.... ROFL << That should be your response to him.

Give him a nickname like: The-man-who-maxed-out-on-knowledge-after-4-books.

"Hey bro, make room in your big brain for a 5th book yet?"

Sometimes the best way to meet stupidity and arrogance is with ridicule. Don't let people get away with frame-controlling you with their own ignorance like that.

[Shubham]

first thing he is scared shitless bro... He may be conservative may be... He doesn't like his world view bubble popped... So he got angry on you for trying to persuade him....

he should be more open to new stuffs... I mean what king of youth this is.. If you are not willing to explore...

I would have told him to read more and more and clear his doubts as much as he could through out his entire life... And keep exploring... And discuss more ...

and learn to loose control...!!! Just observe

[Shubham]

8 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Ahahahahahahahaaa.... ROFL << That should be your response to him.

Give him a nickname like: The-man-who-maxed-out-on-knowledge-after-4-books.

"Hey bro, make room in your big brain for a 5th book yet?"

Sometimes the best way to meet stupidity and arrogance is with ridicule. Don't let people get away with frame-controlling you with their own ignorance like that.

I agree with what you say leo

[Tom Beast]

Not reading would be good in case he was a genius… because why would he clutter his clear-thinking mind by some rubbish...

BUT is he a genius ?

usually books are written by people waaay smarter and experienced in the field, than even smartass.

hah.. but truth is also... nowadays everyone can write a book and there is an inflation on content,  but still you can find true experts.

 

 

[bazera]

@JeffR1 Thanks for the reply and yeah, I won't let him hurt himself in any way  I will try at least.

@Leo Gura Haha lool  That's kind of what I said Leo, I was being sarcastic and that made him very very angry, because deep down he believes that the information what he just googled and found, or read in 3 books is enough to say that he somehow knows the subject well enough, to advice others. And he believes that he discovered lots of things that he founds dangerous, and that's why he prefers to not read anymore.

@Shubham That's what I am telling him.

@Tom Beast He definitely isn't  Yes, that's why there are trusted people like Leo, to tell you which books you should and shouldn't read.

[bazera]

@Pinocchio Yes I agree, we must all learn to be independent thinkers, but we are so overwhelmed by today's social life that it's kind of not easy. We are surrounded by dogmas and beliefs which we believe but aren't sure why and etc. The problem I think is that he thinks he knows something, and that's the danger. He just lost the change of knowing more, and getting to know with a different perspectives of the matter. He just says that he knows something with reading 1 book and that's all. He doesn't want to explore and discover so much things that needs to be discovered, because he just says that he KNOWS! I think that's a huge problem, isn't it?

[Mooders]

I think he is mistaken, however i was also mistaken in the same way when i was younger. As a teen I thought I had it all figured out I had recently been contemplating my own death which is something my peers would not do and it left me a place of depression and anxiety. Whilst I was in this place i was desperately searching for some kind of evidence that life was not pointless or random or that science did not have all the answers so the idea that people had studied the human mind and the way it behaves and all my thoughts and emotions could be predicted and I had no free will scared the living shit out of me, It did massive damage to me at the time I was not ready for it. Whilst I now understand studying further into this that it is good for me and that my reactions were just my 'ego' and i wasnt necassarily thinking straight I can understand why people stay away from this field it is emotionally difficult to get into and if you are not ready for it it can be overwhelming ;P

Self help like this has completely destroyed the previous way I look on life and it has been extremely uncomfortable I may be projecting my experiences on your friend but maybe he just wants to stay where he is comfortable.

[bazera]

@Mooders Yup, he likes being in his comfort zone but he doesn't know what is waiting for him outside of it. And doesn't want to know, because he has cut himself from the sources from where he can actually feel what is possible. Even when I showed him Leo's videos, he said that he already knew that "theory" and methods that he was telling him, that's exactly the approach that will cause a lot damage to him, without even realizing it. And he was being quite ironic to me, when he was looking at me watching Leo talking about lots of things, so, this ironic approach won't be useful for him in his future and even in his present time I guess.

[bazera]

@Pinocchio This thread was also intended for me to understand if I was doing something wrong, and your post somehow made me understand that, thanks. I am behaving in a very wrong way too, but tell me honestly, what would you say to a person, that hasn't even read 3-4 books on a subject, and is arguing with you that he knows what he is talking about. Maybe he does know right? But when I ask him what does he know, I mean, specifically, to share a bit of his knowledge to me, he says that he doesn't remember  I was really intrigued, because he was so convincingly telling me that he knew he had read something in the past that he found it dangerous, and decided to not read anymore after that, but he can't even recall or say what that "thing" was. I mean, what is the proper reaction to this, in your opinion? I opened this thread just to know how other people would think about this, because I didn't like the feeling I was feeling. Don't get me wrong, I am not saying that I am better then he in some way, just I want to know what is the best way to approach him, to talk to him. I didn't even know there was such kind of thing as "self-help" 3-4 months ago, so naturally I lack a self-development a lot, but that doesn't mean I don't have my opinion about what I am discussing with my friends, and when I heard the friend I am talking about, I really got confused, because talking about how books can be beneficial for a person wasn't enough :\

Edited February 11, 2016 by bazera

[bazera]

@Pinocchio Yes, I couldn't agree more, but again, I was asking him to communicate something that he said he has READ. How could he read something that can not be captured in symbols? We can only read symbols, can't we? I agree with everything you say, and I am not trying to advice my friend or anything like that. The fact is that he was not just talking about reading, he was talking about thinking too, and generally, what we call "self-help" here, cause he finds that distracting and damaging in some cases, because again, he thinks that it is dangerous when you know something about yourself.

Anyways, thanks a lot for the reply.

Edited February 11, 2016 by bazera

[murray prince]

It seems to be that clear personal recognition within that fuels the will to venture onto the self development road ... based on the further clear recognition that without having followed this course, there is just no chance of laying on your death bed with a grin ... meaning, having come to terms with what lifes real  challenge to each and every individual is and having given it your best possible shot from the moment of enlightenment.

bazera, maybe your friend is on a different life path entirely ... could even be an imbalance that needs sorting . Seems you care a lot so I hope things work out.

 

[bazera]

@murray prince Thanks, I hope that too.

@Pinocchio Yup, I won't. I am not going to interfere in his life in any way. He should live his life as he wants, he may learn anything from his experience, or from books or from whatever he wants, but It's not really nice of him to tell me that I am on a wrong path and I am doing some kind of a fairy-tale things that this guy is talking about in his videos (Leo). But why should his opinion be important to me? There is no reason for that, so I will let him be as he wants, because I do have a lot of work to do for myself, I don't really have time to think about others too (yet), when they don't even want to listen to me.

And yes, he was talking about ego, and he is afraid of his lower self (educated lower self ) 

Edited February 11, 2016 by bazera