Why women should make the first move (sometimes)

[Peter Miklis]

There was a couple of women in the past who made the "first move" on me (not really first move, just innitiated conversation), and while it's a cool thing, it's probably better long term for men to approach. 

[ertopolice]

I am struggling with my approach initiating. I feel too much masculine vs. needy sometimes that i got to get obsessed about it 

[RendHeaven]

11 hours ago, Preety_India said:

Men don't like being approached. They reject.

No matter how hot the woman.

Girl how can you possibly say "all men" with a straight face ?

[Preety_India]

Just now, RendHeaven said:

Girl how can you possibly say "all men" with a straight face ?

Boy be a girl for a day.

 

[RendHeaven]

2 hours ago, ertopolice said:

I am struggling with my approach initiating. I feel too much masculine vs. needy sometimes that i got to get obsessed about it 

Do men not approach you?

[Preety_India]

3 minutes ago, RendHeaven said:

Do men not approach you?

Here you have the answer to the original question of OP. Whenever women make a puppy face and approach men, the first question they think of is - do men not approach you ? Damn. There goes her chance to get a man. He subconsciously decided that she is unwanted. 

This is the reason why women are advised are told to not approach men..solid live example of that mentality.

[RendHeaven]

1 minute ago, Preety_India said:

Boy be a girl for a day.

Don't need to. My ex was the one who seduced me into a beautiful 2 year relationship. I basically sat there doing nothing... I am a living example of a guy who accepted a woman's advance

Or in other words, my mere existence is a contradiction to your original statement of, "All men don't like being approached, they reject."

I'm curious, does that change your mind at all? Or will you choose to view my story as an anomaly?

2 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

Here you have the answer to the original question of OP. Whenever women make a puppy face and approach men, the first question they think of is - do men not approach you ? Damn. There goes her chance to get a man. He subconsciously decided that she is unwanted. 

This is the reason why women are advised are told to not approach men..solid live example of that mentality.

Lol I was literally just curious. I've made no conclusions as to ertopolice's desirability.

In fact, I'm assuming the answer will be yes, that she does experience men approaching.

My follow up curiosity question was going to be something like: "Are you unhappy with the quality/kind of men that approach you? If so, why?"

[Preety_India]

2 minutes ago, RendHeaven said:

Don't need to. My ex was the one who seduced me into a beautiful 2 year relationship. I basically sat there doing nothing... I am a living example of a guy who accepted a woman's advance

Or in other words, my mere existence is a contradiction to your original statement of, "All men don't like being approached, they reject."

I'm curious, does that change your mind at all? Or will you choose to view my story as an anomaly?

Lol I was literally just curious. I've made no conclusions as to ertopolice's desirability.

In fact, I'm assuming the answer will be yes, that she does experience men approaching.

My follow up curiosity question was going to be something like: "Are you unhappy with the quality/kind of men that approach you? If so, why?"

Your example is an anomaly. Regarding ertopolice, if you already thought men were approaching her, you wouldn't ask that question.

 

[Tangerinedream]

@Preety_India  I don’t think it’s the case that all women are being approached all the time.  There is only a handful of times when I was cold approached on the street by a random guy.  There is lots of things to take into account, I’m a loner and don’t go out partying anymore so I have less chances of being approached than a girl who is often out on the street or going to clubs. 

[RendHeaven]

2 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

Your example is an anomaly.

How do we know that YOUR story is not the anomaly? To me, my experience is quite normal. In fact, my ex before this ex also asked me out. I have friends with similar stories of the girl initiating.

You know, I have a sneaking suspicion that we are each defining "normal" based on our own experiences without accounting for the stories of others.

Maybe "normal" is not such an objective concept, and people exhibit a range of behaviors?

3 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

if you already thought men were approaching her, you wouldn't ask that question.

It's just a question ma'am ?

[Preety_India]

Just now, Tangerinedream said:

@Preety_India  I don’t think it’s the case that all women are being approached all the time.  There is only a handful of times when I was cold approached on the street by a random guy.  There is lots of things to take into account, I’m a loner and don’t go out partying anymore so I have less chances of being approached than a girl who is often out on the street or going to clubs. 

True. 

[Preety_India]

1 minute ago, RendHeaven said:

How do we know that YOUR story is not the anomaly? To me, my experience is quite normal. In fact, my ex before this ex also asked me out. I have friends with similar stories of the girl initiating.

You know, I have a sneaking suspicion that we are each defining "normal" based on our own experiences without accounting for the stories of others.

Maybe "normal" is not such an objective concept, and people exhibit a range of behaviors?

It's just a question ma'am ?

And how do you know that your story is not anomaly?

I can literally ask you the same question that you ask me..

[ertopolice]

@RendHeaven @Preety_India

@Preety_India is quite correct about that feeling they should have on me being "unwanted by men if i approach them

...but hey, what happens i am really interested? but yes...seems needy sometims

@RendHeaven no, they do not approach 

i barely go out and we're mostly females in my workplace

[ertopolice]

1 hour ago, RendHeaven said:

Don't need to. My ex was the one who seduced me into a beautiful 2 year relationship. I basically sat there doing nothing... I am a living example of a guy who accepted a woman's advance

Or in other words, my mere existence is a contradiction to your original statement of, "All men don't like being approached, they reject."

I'm curious, does that change your mind at all? Or will you choose to view my story as an anomaly?

Lol I was literally just curious. I've made no conclusions as to ertopolice's desirability.

In fact, I'm assuming the answer will be yes, that she does experience men approaching.

My follow up curiosity question was going to be something like: "Are you unhappy with the quality/kind of men that approach you? If so, why?"

Regarding desirability...

what traits would you care for in a woman's desirability?

Edited August 2, 2021 by ertopolice

[Mason Riggle]

My wife made the first move.  I was friends with her brother, and I was staying at his place for work, and she woke me up with a BJ.. the rest is history.  I must be an anomaly too. 

[Preety_India]

1 minute ago, Mason Riggle said:

she woke me up with a BJ..

What ???

 

[Mason Riggle]

@Preety_India true story. 

[Vzdoh]

9 hours ago, Flowerfaeiry said:

Of course, you can ask a guy out if you want to but where's the fun in that? If you are interested in a man, invoke him to ask you out

Exactly!!! I was waiting on at least someone in here to showcase how u truly can be feminine and masculine at the same time, integrating both successfully. This is a perfect example! 

You want to control the situation and decide who you like and express attention for, go ahead, but do it in a feminine way - chat/flirt/signal to a guy you like so that he invites you on a date. Then both parties are happy. Women are still in their feminine and men in their masculine. Case solved. 

[Preety_India]

20 minutes ago, Mason Riggle said:

My wife made the first move.  I was friends with her brother, and I was staying at his place for work, and she woke me up with a BJ.. the rest is history.  I must be an anomaly too. 

I wouldn't call this an approach though. Do you really imagine everyday women going around giving random blowjobs. So it's kinda indecent. I have no clue what made her do it. But I can't imagine other women doing this 

 

[Mason Riggle]

@Preety_India I wasn't suggesting it's a good strategy.  I just think it's a bit misguided to think that "Men don't like being approached. They reject."