Why women should make the first move (sometimes)

[Karmadhi]

An interesting video i watched, i really like this youtuber. What are your thoughts on it, i see no reason why this does not become more popular. Maybe 50/50 idk.

[Preety_India]

Men don't like being approached. They reject.

No matter how hot the woman.

 

[Ilan]

15 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

Men don't like being approached. They reject.

No matter how hot the woman.

 

Wtf ? ?

[Karmadhi]

 

19 minutes ago, Ilan said:

Wtf ? ?

Exactly, i do not know where she comes up with such statements. Guys will LOVE anything that comes to them for free, because they  HATE to approach and do all that game bs. Very few people actually enjoy it, mostly veterans that have made an identity out of it. For most guys it is a necessary evil rather than something they enjoy doing. Especially regarding approaching. 

Now, in some countries and cultures due to social conditioning the men might feel lame or "girly" if the girl makes the moves and hurt their insecure masculine ego. However, if females making moves would become more common then that cultural conditioning can change in time.

Personally if a girl approached me i would be a bit weirded out not because "i like to approach" but because it is so uncommon that i would feel like there is a hidden agenda or something. If i was convinced that she was just interested and was bold to make the move i would ABSOLUTELY love it and probably give her a chance when normally i would not (if i had to approach her), so even average or slighlty below average girls would get a good chance to get something. How do you think ugly guys do it lol, approaching a lot will lead better results compared to being passive. 

[Preety_India]

36 minutes ago, Ilan said:

Wtf ? ?

Men have an egoic social approach to life. Everything is all about showing off, a form of chimpery that makes them feel vital. They can't be blamed because Evolution trained them that way.

I shouldn't deny that women are also responsible for this, but it's majorly driven by men competing with men.

So when a woman, no matter how attractive, approaches a man, in his eyes she is unworthy, loose character, "easy girl," "not a prize," these are all the terms running through his head and he doesn't see her as valuable because she does not puff his ego, he didn't get anything from her, she already surrendered to him, without him having to chase. (In this regard, men are fucked seriously and eternally and royally, only if men learned to say yes and if evolution wasn't driving them nuts ) men are so eternally damned that they might even want to stalk a woman they like to no end yet when an equally attractive woman makes a move, they develop cold feet, in essence men dig their own graves and create their own misery.

Men can be very cruel in this regard. Men act like women reject so much and are so hurt, but the same men will reject a lot of women if these men were approached by women. Men think of such women as "bimbos" and downgrade them and even if she is hot, she is still a "hot bimbo" in their eyes so for them "a bimbo is still a bimbo" in short men denigrate and shame women who approach them.

When I approached a few guys, a few responses I got were along the lines of "you're attractive......but, I don't like being approached."

Men like to chase, this chase is fueled by testosterone.

They want a woman who is seen as a prize, who doesn't give a fuck about men, who is being chased by several men, because conquering her is like winning a prize.

Whereas an approaching woman is basically zero conquest.

That's why women play hard to get, because that way they're valued more by men.

 

The only man who ever says "yes" to a woman approaching him is a man with zero options. Or a very submissive man or too horny.

 

Edited August 1, 2021 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

20 minutes ago, Karmadhi said:

i would feel like there is a hidden agenda or something.

So so so so cruel, just can't win with men, even in approaching them, they have to see something bad, y'all got trust issues. When a woman says she doesn't need a man, you get pissed off, when a woman says she needs a man, you look at her with suspicion. Just can't win with men.. you don't see your own cruelty. You need to be open and loving to women rather than suspicious.

[Harlen Kelly]

@Karmadhi That is a losing strategy. 

@Preety_India  Are you trolling?

[Preety_India]

1 minute ago, Harlen Kelly said:

@Karmadhi That is a losing strategy. 

@Preety_India  Are you trolling?

You aren't in the position of a woman to see how they feel when they want a man and he simply doesn't care. Because he thinks too highly of himself. You haven't felt that emotion. Try being around high ego men.

 

[Harlen Kelly]

@Preety_India I don't know if I should take you seriously. 

[Preety_India]

@Harlen Kelly then you haven't explored dating from a woman's perspective. You only think from the man's side. 

Think about groupies and how they get rejected 

 

 

[Jacob Morres]

@Preety_India

Maybe your approach was bad 

Sounds like a trauma response to rejection 

Maybe you can approach initially but then put the ball in his court to do the "hunting"

Edited August 2, 2021 by Jacob Morres

[Preety_India]

4 minutes ago, Jacob Morres said:

@Preety_India

Maybe your approach was bad 

Sounds like a trauma response to rejection 

Men find every flaw and fault as a way to deny a woman's Perspective. They simply can't admit that they play chimp games, somehow it's always the woman's fault.

There is a reason why the phrase Prince Charming exists. But there is no female equivalent of that phrase.

We never say Princess Charming.

 

Edited August 2, 2021 by Preety_India

[Jacob Morres]

@Preety_India even if everything you said was true it's still only partial because your label of "evil"

Imo, even if true, it means your game/approach needs to be changed on your part

It's just a lot of victim mentality 

Edited August 2, 2021 by Jacob Morres

[Karmadhi]

@Preety_IndiaYou simply fail to understand how men think. All that "play hard to get" bs is what females do. That is what you are attracted to, something difficult to get that has high status and everyone wants.

Guys are not attracted in that way, they are attracted at least initially in how the girl looks. If a hot girl comes to them they will be EAGER to sleep with her ASAP. End of discussion.

Some guys are more feminine like me and want some emotional connection to sleep with someone but such people are not the norm. The norm is what i wrote on the second paragraph.

[Preety_India]

Just now, Jacob Morres said:

@Preety_India even if everything you said was true it's still only partial because your label of "evil"

Imo, if true, it means the game needs to be changed on your part

It's a lot of victim mentality 

Nope. It's not victim mentality. It's called pointing out behaviors that is not healthy. And in this case I'm pointing out "egoic behaviours " in men.

You know what, to say that only women reject is extremely unfair. 

Even men reject. Deal with the truth 

 

[Ilan]

3 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

Men find every flaw and fault as a way to deny a woman's Perspective. They simply can't admit that they play chimp games, somehow it's always the woman's fault.

There is a reason why the phrase Prince Charming exists. But there is no female equivalent of that phrase.

 

I feel your pain. Do not let your pain make you fall into this. You’re falling into the same trap this new toxic men are.

[Preety_India]

1 minute ago, Karmadhi said:

@Preety_IndiaYou simply fail to understand how men think. All that "play hard to get" bs is what females do. That is what you are attracted to, something difficult to get that has high status and everyone wants.

Guys are not attracted in that way, they are attracted at least initially in how the girl looks. If a hot girl comes to them they will be EAGER to sleep with her ASAP. End of discussion.

Some guys are more feminine like me and want some emotional connection to sleep with someone but such people are not the norm. The norm is what i wrote on the second paragraph.

Not true. Only true if the guy is really horny. Not otherwise. You are talking about men with zero options and non ego men. Men with ego and pride reject a lot of women because they want the chase. They look down on women who approach, also consider her as abnormal.

You want a woman to approach but at the same time when a woman actually does it, you get cold feet.

Men don't encourage this behaviour in women.

 

[Karmadhi]

3 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

Men with ego and pride reject a lot of women because they want the chase

Such men will treat you like shit, pump and dump you and even abuse you. Not healthy mature men these are. It is good that they reject you because they are saving you a lot of headache. 

A smart mature guy will not use this bullshit ego logic in his life. He will be pragmatic and smart. If he can skip all the headaches of approaching and shit then he will do it without his pride being touched.

The whole notion of "conquering someone" is just dumb ego shit. You should want someone that is above such silly immature notions. Be glad such men are rejecting you.

 

 

Edited August 2, 2021 by Karmadhi

[Preety_India]

1 minute ago, Karmadhi said:

Such men will treat you like shit, pump and dump you and even abuse you. Not healthy mature men these are. It is good that they reject you because they are saving you a lot of headache. 

 

 

In a way you're right. My point however wasn't whether they are good or bad, just that men who reject women also exist. Men reject women but don't see themselves doing it. 

 

[Karmadhi]

@Preety_India I cater to the guy that struggles with girls and is desperate for anything.

You cater to the player who has shit lot of options and has pride and an ego identity out of getting girls.

We cater to the two extremes.

This explains this whole discussion we re having.