Insecure & depressed about my height. Considering suicide

[Preety_India]

3 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Where guys go wrong with this blackpill propaganda is that they start to think of attraction as some abstraction, as if there is such a thing. In reality, you only need to attract one specific girl out of hundreds. Therefore perfection is not at all needed. And girls are not all attracted to the exact same guy.

You have to consider that these guys want to attract maximum number of girls.. How will you convince them that all girls aren't for them? 

 

[Flowerfaeiry]

5 hours ago, Olivia24 said:

Do the  best with what you  have!! Im 5'4 and  would  love to be  5'7.

LMAO I'm 6ft. Most men are shorter than me. A whole different set of struggles. 

[Leo Gura]

41 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

You have to consider that these guys want to attract maximum number of girls.. How will you convince them that all girls aren't for them?

Well, that's just stupid. I have no interest in convincing a fool of anything other than his foolishness.

Which is why I laugh at such things. Some things are too stupid to answer seriously.

[Byun Sean]

what you need to work on is not primarily your height or your looks but your insecurity about them which is what will really turn women off.

 

neediness is the #1 turn off for girls regardless of height or how a guy looks.

 

Besides you can't really change your height or looks a significant amount. You can to an extent.

 

But if your truly interested in maximizing your odds you gotta work on your personality, your confidence, your humor, your masculinity, etc.

This stuff can be enhanced 100000x+ if you really work at it.

 

In order to get better with women you need to both work on yourself and get experience with women in the field/ socialize. You need both and 

blaming everything on your looks and society isn't serving you.

 

The best you can do is give your looks your best shot. Then after that it all comes down to your personality to increase your

chances the most.

 

 

Edited August 6, 2021 by Byun Sean

[Arcangelo]

On 8/4/2021 at 5:41 PM, Karmadhi said:

@Username If she is taller than you re kind of fucked with that girl.

Exceptions are if you re very rich, famous, handsome or have insane game. Not applicable for 95 percent of guys.

agree

[Leo Gura]

It's so hilarious how guys use "unless you're rich" as an excuse.

If you truly believe that being rich gets you hot girls, then your path is so easy: go get rich!

The excuses are endless with you guys.

You expect hot girls but zero work to get them. This is fundamentally why you're miserable.

You will get from life exactly what you put into it.

[Vzdoh]

1 hour ago, Leo Gura said:

It's so hilarious how guys use "unless you're rich" as an excuse.

If you truly believe that being rich gets you hot girls, then your path is so easy: go get rich!

The excuses are endless with you guys.

You expect hot girls but zero work to get them. This is fundamentally why you're miserable.

You will get from life exactly what you put into it.

Exactly! Girls who want to attract the most successful guy, work on their value, by investing in their looks, body, mind/psychological wellbeing. 

Why guys want to have a hot babe doing nothing? 

Just get it in your head/scull that hot babe has plenty of options, understand what her criteria to filter these options are and go work on those areas to better yourself. 

What's so hard about it? I don't really understand. Why spend countless hours on this forum discussing theory and complaining, when you can just stop the nonsense and go improve yourself to become more attractive? 

For example, in my case, I already have good genetics, thanks to mom and dad, but I am proactively trying to improve my looks to be able to attract more guys, so that I can pick who I like. 

Things I do to be more attractive to the opposite sex:

1) weight training/swimming almost every single day. My body is firm and tight and looks better than that of many women in their late 20s who don't do any sports. 

2) financial independence - I work for myself, increasing my income, saving a ton, so that I don't have to go for guys who are not equally well off or less successful. I make it a big point actually. 

3) psychological wellbeing - there are a lot of womem out there with psychological disorders, self esteem issues, unstable/immature emotionally. I proactively invest in developing my empathy, maturing emotionally, psychological health and personal and spiritual growth. 

All of the above I am doing regularly and continuously and so I feel like I would want to date me. And of course guys see all these and want to get a piece ???❤️

Become the best version of yourself so that you want to date you and then see what happens! ?

[Olivia24]

7 hours ago, Flowerfaeiry said:

LMAO I'm 6ft. Most men are shorter than me. A whole different set of struggles. 

But a tall beauty. I guess you  need a  basketball player!!

[Olivia24]

3 hours ago, Vzdoh said:

Exactly! Girls who want to attract the most successful guy, work on their value, by investing in their looks, body, mind/psychological wellbeing. 

Why guys want to have a hot babe doing nothing? 

Just get it in your head/scull that hot babe has plenty of options, understand what her criteria to filter these options are and go work on those areas to better yourself. 

What's so hard about it? I don't really understand. Why spend countless hours on this forum discussing theory and complaining, when you can just stop the nonsense and go improve yourself to become more attractive? 

For example, in my case, I already have good genetics, thanks to mom and dad, but I am proactively trying to improve my looks to be able to attract more guys, so that I can pick who I like. 

Things I do to be more attractive to the opposite sex:

1) weight training/swimming almost every single day. My body is firm and tight and looks better than that of many women in their late 20s who don't do any sports. 

2) financial independence - I work for myself, increasing my income, saving a ton, so that I don't have to go for guys who are not equally well off or less successful. I make it a big point actually. 

3) psychological wellbeing - there are a lot of womem out there with psychological disorders, self esteem issues, unstable/immature emotionally. I proactively invest in developing my empathy, maturing emotionally, psychological health and personal and spiritual growth. 

All of the above I am doing regularly and continuously and so I feel like I would want to date me. And of course guys see all these and want to get a piece ???❤️

Become the best version of yourself so that you want to date you and then see what happens! ?

I  have  num 1 and 2 covered  but  i do need work on self-esteem. When a realtionship fails i think  its all me.

[AtheisticNonduality]

8 hours ago, Flowerfaeiry said:

LMAO I'm 6ft. Most men are shorter than me. A whole different set of struggles. 

That's a very nice height for a girl because you don't have to bend down too far if you want to hug them. But from what I've understood from tall girls complaining to me, your struggles are shorter guys feeling insecure and also girls bullying you maybe?

37 minutes ago, Peter Miklis said:

?? just kidding.

Sure.

[Karmadhi]

@Leo Gura

7 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

You expect hot girls but zero work to get them

Most people here that complain including most incels in forums NEVER say they want HOT girls, they just want A GIRL. This is just your projection into them, most of these guys would be happy with an okay looking girl. Hot girls of course nobody would turn down but that is not their primary goal. I never spoke with an incel that wanted hot girls, they said they just want an okay looking girl. Big difference here. Of course hot girls are super hard to get, that is common sense. But needing to work so much for an average girl is what annoys these guys. After all an incel is a guy that cannot get laid at all, not a guy that cannot get laid with hot girls. Please make the distinction.

9 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Where guys go wrong with this blackpill propaganda is that they start to think of attraction as some abstraction, as if there is such a thing. In reality, you only need to attract one specific girl out of hundreds.

Most people do not want to go to clubs 3 times a week. They want 1 girl from their everyday life that they interact with to be into them. You make it as if you are not going into clubs then you will stay home 24/7. Not true at all.  But 1 girl out of 200 is crazy ratio to be consistent. It means you are living to get girls and do nothing more. 1 girl out of 10 to be into you should be enough.

 

7 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

If you truly believe that being rich gets you hot girls, then your path is so easy: go get rich!

By rich people mean legit multi millionares. Not some guy that is well off. Having 10 million dollars is much harder than doing 10.000 approaches.

 

9 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Newsflash: you're always fucked with some women. And also unfucked with others

Yes of course you are. That is common sense. The thing is what is the percentage that you are fucked with.

[Farnaby]

17 minutes ago, Karmadhi said:

@Leo Gura

Most people here that complain including most incels in forums NEVER say they want HOT girls, they just want A GIRL. This is just your projection into them, most of these guys would be happy with an okay looking girl. Hot girls of course nobody would turn down but that is not their primary goal. I never spoke with an incel that wanted hot girls, they said they just want an okay looking girl. Big difference here. Of course hot girls are super hard to get, that is common sense. But needing to work so much for an average girl is what annoys these guys. After all an incel is a guy that cannot get laid at all, not a guy that cannot get laid with hot girls. Please make the distinction.

Most people do not want to go to clubs 3 times a week. They want 1 girl from their everyday life that they interact with to be into them. You make it as if you are not going into clubs then you will stay home 24/7. Not true at all.  But 1 girl out of 200 is crazy ratio to be consistent. It means you are living to get girls and do nothing more. 1 girl out of 10 to be into you should be enough.

 

By rich people mean legit multi millionares. Not some guy that is well off. Having 10 million dollars is much harder than doing 10.000 approaches.

 

Yes of course you are. That is common sense. The thing is what is the percentage that you are fucked with.

The way you talk about "average" girls transpires a lot of bad vibes. 

As if you feel entitled to an average girl and are frustrated that you can't attract her. 

I'm a guy but I can see how easily this could turn off any girl, hot or not. When you have this attitude you are actually destroying your self-esteem, because you constantly tell yourself you can't even attract an average girl. 

Maybe if you stop ranking girls like an object that should conform to your needs and expectations, you will have way better connection with them and eventually some of them may be in to you. 

[Karmadhi]

@Farnaby Those successful PUAs see ALL girls as a piece of meat that they can conquer and fuck. Feeling entitled to a girl is better than putting her on a pedestal the way good guys do.

[Farnaby]

5 minutes ago, Karmadhi said:

@Farnaby Those successful PUAs see ALL girls as a piece of meat that they can conquer and fuck. Feeling entitled to a girl is better than putting her on a pedestal the way good guys do.

Who said you should put them on a pedestal? Too much theory and complaining how unfair life is won't make you successful with women. 

I'm pretty sure those PUAs aren't projecting a vibe of frustration when they are successful. 

I just noticed a lot of resentment in how incels usually talk and while I'm not a woman I'm sure that's not really attractive to be around that kind of energy.

Actually one could argue that this resentment is a symptom of putting them on a pedestal. It's not the kind of attractive entitlement that stems from being confident.

[Roy]

@Vzdoh Not everyone starts the "race" of life at the same gunshot. The reason many people are on here spending "countless hours theorizing" is because they trying to fill a deep hole in their understanding from not having the luck of having a proper upbringing, or trying to untie an extremely corrupt knot of confusion in their minds. These limiting beliefs and deficiencies can go down very core of the their being. As in the suffering has made up most of their experience in their existence. They don't know what things could be like if they were better. It's difficult to navigate out of dangerous waters to the shore if you don't have a lighthouse. They are here to find out that lighthouse even exists.

It's not as easy as just going and "doing it". That's honestly just a simpleton thing to say and a complete nothing sandwich. Of course the reason you might not understand fully is if you started from a position of privelege, which you did by your own admission. Everyone has to work hard to reach a certain set of results yes, but you have to appreciate some simply need to work harder than others based on the foundation (or lack thereof) they were given in life. When you tell someone to "just do X bro quit being a victim!" In such a sterile and binary way its going to be really hard for them to take it on seriously. Especially when and I'm sorry to say this, it's coming from that good looking babe who is going on an egoic speil about herself. It just comes off as patronizing and cringy. Humans, and particularly vulnerable ones need more nuanced connection, not a set of math formulas preached at them.

Not to mention it will never be as easy as just doing it when you have a problem like being too short. Which while isn't a big deal in the context of our spiritual existence, poses a large problem within the judgement of our low consciousness culture. People grappling with what are essentially handicaps need a higher quality specialized form of advice and need to resonated with first. Or it'll just fall on deaf ears or even make the problem worse.

[RickyFitts]

4 hours ago, Olivia24 said:

But a tall beauty. I guess you  need a  basketball player!!

I'm quite a tall guy (6 foot 1) so my girlfriends have all been quite a bit shorter than me. Might feel a bit weird to date a woman who was about my height, though heck, if Mandy Moore or Maria Sharapova came knocking I probably wouldn't knock them back  It's not something I attach a whole lot of importance to though, sexy, beautiful women come in all shapes and sizes 

[Growly]

@InsecureAnon I think the best way to break out of this perspective is to watch gruesome videos. It helped me a lot from breaking out of your mindset because by watching these videos, it forced me to realize how lucky I am. It's definitely possible to go even more suicidal but if you have nothing else left, then just try this out because it can probably destroy your mindset quickly. 
 

I was in your shoes and I'm still am but I've been starting to heal a bit by looking for good copes, like spirituality. yay. 

here are some copes that are so generic but it's helpful and you probably know them since you've tried to look for copes.

-Look for celebrities that are the same height and look up for them and you can probably resonate with them because you're the same height as him/her. (this makes me chuckle  because this doesn't work most of the time)

-Go onto websites that are about height struggles and you'll probably feel better since you're not alone. (this one is legit tbh)

-Compare yourself to uglier people(generic as fuck xD)

The only fastest practical way is to watch gruesome videos and visual yourself in their shoes and you'll either feel suicidal or realize how stupid you are about how you wasted so much time fixating over this.

Good luck man. I feel your fucking pain. I developed bruxism from this mindset because of how depressing it was :(. I sometimes wonder if I'm going to break out.

[Preety_India]

7 hours ago, Karmadhi said:

they said they just want an okay looking girl.

I think that's a very demeaning way of putting it. You can say average girl instead of saying okay looking girl. 

[Karmadhi]

@Preety_India I find "average" girl more demeaning. That is why i said okay looking, to be nice.

[Olivia24]

1 hour ago, Karmadhi said:

@Preety_India I find "average" girl more demeaning. That is why i said okay looking, to be nice.

average girl demeaning? Thats a slap in the face to an awful lot  of  girls.