Struggling with Blackpill

[4201]

Y'all need more brainwashing.

[Preety_India]

7 minutes ago, Harlen Kelly said:

Do you consider that the women who typically have sex on the second or third date such as @Hulia are devaluing themselves?

How is having sex with somebody you feel attracted to devaluing, explain....

You're twisting things. You're constantly talking about how you're going to replace women as though they aren't worth your time if they don't do what you want.

A woman shouldn't need to and shouldn't have to be at the mercy of your validation.

She isn't losing anything as much as you're trying to imply by making her feel replaceable.

If you cannot value her enough to value her space and time and intimacy needs, sorry but you don't deserve to have her love in your life and she doesn't need to guilt herself because you replaced her with someone else.

You talk to women in a depowering way. 

Women need to empower themselves enough to not have to put up with this sort of bs 

And the woman above @modmyth laid out excellent points how men who think this way weed themselves automatically.

 

Edited July 23, 2021 by Preety_India

[electroBeam]

2 minutes ago, 4201 said:

Y'all need more brainwashing.

most relevant post in this entire thread.

Thanks @Emerald for posting on here. They say that if you're trying to catch a fish, don't ask fish but only ask fisherman, that's not always true.

[Harlen Kelly]

@Preety_India Great, but I would like to you to answer my question.

Do you consider that the women who typically have sex on the second or third date such as @Hulia  are devaluing themselves? Do you see that as a devaluing activity?

9 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

She isn't losing anything as much as you're trying to imply by making her feel replaceable.

I mean, there are 3.5 billion of them, saying they are not replaceable is mathematically inconsistent. Men are replaceable as well. 

Edited July 23, 2021 by Harlen Kelly

[Harlen Kelly]

5 minutes ago, Lucas-fgm said:

Serious, some women here are starting to sound delusional

This has always puzzled me because the sex empowerment movement was back in the 60s, you would think more people, particularly women who were regarded as dirty for expressing their sexuality and having casual sex, would have a more progressive view on sex. 

Very strange indeed. 

[Jacob Morres]

This forum needs a consciousness awakening 

[Preety_India]

Just now, Harlen Kelly said:

@Preety_India Great, but I would like to you to answer my question.

Do you consider that the women who typically have sex on the second or third date such as @Hulia  are devaluing themselves? Do you see that as a devaluing activity?

I mean, there are 3.5 billion of them, saying they are not replace is mathematically inconsistent. Men are replaceable as well. 

Whenever you think that you're replaceable you're low on self worth. You and I are on two different planes of thinking. 

You're looking at this in a way like it's some form of competition, more relatable to Stage Orange thinking.

I'm looking at this from the Stage Green perspective of intimacy, emphathy and cultivating understanding 

Not saying I'm being superior. Just saying it's two different things.

I'm not looking at it as an elimination round.

I'm looking at it from the perspective of building a relationship rather than testing whether a person fits your list of demands.

You keep saying that men need to have options.

But you're hypocritical because as much you keep trumpeting that men can have options you keep telling a woman that she has zero options or that she will be with a man who has zero options or low value man.

Why exactly is he a low value man simply because he isn't interested in chasing whatever pussy he can get ? How exactly do you come to this conclusion ?

You're demonizing men who want to wait for a woman trying to imply that he is beta or lame or weak. Perfect definition of toxic masculinity.

No. A man wanting a woman and fulfilling her Emotionally is not inferior or superior. He has his needs and preferences just the way you have. Respect that maybe 

 

The question you asked is totally irrelevant. Whether a woman has sex on a date or on whatever date is irrelevant. I don't judge that.

The discussion was about valuing women. Not making them feel like they're losing something. Nobody is losing anything by simply stating their needs. If you can't honor their needs that's okay but they aren't wrong in wanting what they want.

You're like this - you like coffee. But you demonize all others who like tea and not coffee. You're constantly imposing your needs on others and making them look like losers if they can't meet your needs. 

But you're not realising that you're out of the equation once you don't meet their needs. It's not the same as losing. But you make it out to be that way.

 

[Harlen Kelly]

5 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

Whether a woman has sex on a date or on whatever date is irrelevant. I don't judge that.

Good, that's all I wanted to know. Women who have casual sex are not less than. 

5 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

he is beta or lame or weak

For some reason this reminded me of Jesse lee peterson telling destiny: BEEYYYYYTAAA!

lol.

Edited July 23, 2021 by Harlen Kelly

[Preety_India]

2 minutes ago, Harlen Kelly said:

Good, that's all I wanted to know. Women who have casual sex are not less than. 

Nobody ever says that. You're making it. You're doing the exact opposite. You're demonizing women who have other choices.

Why are you telling women that they have zero options?

 

 

Edited July 23, 2021 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

3 minutes ago, Harlen Kelly said:

For some reason this reminded me of Jesse lee peterson telling destiny: BEEYYYYYTAAA!

lol.

Maybe you do it the same way he does.

 

[Harlen Kelly]

@Preety_India Ohh I am doing it right now hahahhahahhah.

[Jacob Morres]

@Preety_India 

A beautiful wall of projection 

[Preety_India]

Just now, Harlen Kelly said:

@Preety_India Ohh I am doing it right now hahahhahahhah.

Lol 

 

[aurum]

These "what are women actually attracted to?" threads have exposed some deep bias and misogyny on this forum.

Not saying the women here are totally pure and without bias. But let's face it, they're quite out-numbered. And the default tendency of this place seems to be to slip into bro-culture.

So for the guys here, pause, breathe and check ya biases. You are generally speaking being given good advice, but many of you are nitpicking and throwing it away. And at the same time, this place is filled with guys who talk about how they struggle with women.

A good question to ask: how might this other person's perspective be true? In what ways could they be right?

[RendHeaven]

@aurum I tried saying the same thing already earlier on page 13 but got completely ignored.

Meta perspectives aren't welcome when you think you've got an enemy to disprove 

[Preety_India]

4 minutes ago, aurum said:

These "what are women actually attracted to?" threads have exposed some deep bias and misogyny on this forum.

Not saying the women here are totally pure and without bias. But let's face it, they're quite out-numbered. And the default tendency of this place seems to be to slip into bro-culture.

So for the guys here, pause, breathe and check ya biases. You are generally speaking being given good advice, but many of you are nitpicking and throwing it away. And at the same time, this place is filled with guys who talk about how they struggle with women.

A good question to ask: how might this other person's perspective be true? In what ways could they be right?

Thanks for bringing a refreshing way of looking at things that have been very stagnant bro culture biased for the longest time here. 

Of course biases exist on both sides, not denying it, but there was too much stifling of the female POV here.

And every time this POV comes up, there is a collective uproar from the male crowd..

This uproar is visible in statements like

"Serious, some women here are starting to sound delusional"

They don't want to ask themselves at least once - "How can all women be wrong at the same time ?"

This collective dismissal of women's perspective on this forum is not an indication of error in female POV but the resistance and the inability to accept how women look at things and imposing male POV on female sexuality as @Emerald stated earlier in this thread.

 

[Leo Gura]

7 hours ago, Karmadhi said:

@Leo Gura I think he wanted to ask how does stupidity enhance a woman survival? If females attraction triggers are based on advancing her survival then why is intelligence not a prime catalyst of attraction? I mean after all, intelligence is primal for survival. That was his question. 

It doesn't. People are just stupid. The end.

[Emerald]

1 hour ago, modmyth said:

I've seen multiple versions of this same answer.

It is a sound enough strategy to let men weed themselves out. Let the impatient and those who think that you're easily replaceable walk away. No need for hard feelings especially if attention and appreciation are abundant. Those who know what they want specifically (as in, YOU and what you have to offer specifically) and perhaps some people who like a challenge for the sake of a challenge may stay, but time and attention tends to weed out the latter too.

It's not even necessarily a conscious strategy either, though I think it's good practice to make it one.

The moment when you think you can't afford to lose something/ someone, especially if it's near the beginning, you've probably already "lost". This is often universally the case.

Not sure why so many people are arguing with @Emerald IRL you probably wouldn't even be on her radar.

Exactly.

But I do know why they're arguing with me so vehemently. In all people, there is a desire for love... even underneath the deepest bigotry, hatred, and bitterness.

And they perceive my survival agenda as something that is out of their control, which is the entire reason why men learn pick-up in the first place... to get some semblance of control over getting a woman to love them.

And then, they repress their loving drives because that feels unsafe to them because sex is possible to game... while love is truly not.

So, they only remain conscious of their drives for sexual variety and forget that they also have a drive that seeks love. The latter drive makes them feel too vulnerable and powerless. So, it gets rejected, repressed, forgotten, and denied. And sex becomes the only means of getting that loving communion they seek. So, they become obsessive about it and feel like they need it right away because sex and love become the same for them. 

So, when a woman tells the truth about her survival agenda and it doesn't match what they've learned about women and what's worked for them sexually, they feel out of control and insecure as it reminds them that they are still in the same position relative to getting love from a woman... which is not a bad position to be in, but it feels that way to men with self-esteem issues.

And then because I share this uncomfortable truth of my reality, I become a projection screen for all their desires to get a woman to love and accept them. And I am mirroring to them that their strategies are making them lower value in my eyes (and most women's eyes, tbh) instead of making them higher value in my eyes and most women's eyes.

This is why those guys are trying to argue me out of it because on some level they feel like I'm rejecting them and women as a whole are rejecting them, even though I am just being very clear about what I won't accept in men in general. And they are trying really hard to maintain the view of women's sexuality that helps them feel more in control and safer from their feelings of low self-esteem. 

But you're right. It really isn't a conscious strategy on my part either. I'm just sharing what's true for me and what's worked well for me, so that other women can adopt these mindsets. 

My intuition does this sorting for me naturally because I've had enough experience to know what I want and what I don't want. And I can also tell the difference between a man wanting me in particular and wanting sex in general. It's really easy to spot as there are tons of red flags and green flags that can be noticed. 

And I don't give any time or energy to what I don't want because I have no sense of scarcity. And I also don't experience wanting a relationship without wanting the person first. So, I'm not itching to be with someone if they're not THE someone that I want.

It would be much harder if I really felt like I needed a relationship because then I would be scrounging for whoever I could get. 

But I am very much of the disposition that I'd rather seek a beautiful experience or simply go without. I don't feel the need to find something lukewarm just to fill a space in my life. 

[aurum]

8 minutes ago, RendHeaven said:

@aurum I tried saying the same thing already earlier on page 13 but got completely ignored.

Meta perspectives aren't welcome when you think you've got an enemy to disprove 

I saw your post. I definitely thought your perspective was one of the more balanced ones in this thread.

16 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

Thanks for bringing a refreshing way of looking at things that have been very stagnant bro culture biased for the longest time here. 

You're welcome.

16 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

And every time this POV comes up, there is a collective uproar from the male crowd..

I've seen that as well. Which then likely drives women away from the forum, further reinforcing the male perspective. In general I'd like to see this place be more balanced.

[Etherial Cat]

5 minutes ago, Emerald said:

Exactly.

But I do know why they're arguing with me so vehemently. In all people, there is a desire for love... even underneath the deepest bigotry, hatred, and bitterness.

And they perceive my survival agenda as something that is out of their control, which is the entire reason why men learn pick-up in the first place... to get some semblance of control over getting a woman to love them.

And then, they repress their loving drives because that feels unsafe to them because sex is possible to game... while love is truly not.

So, they only remain conscious of their drives for sexual variety and forget that they also have a drive that seeks love. The latter drive makes them feel too vulnerable and powerless. So, it gets rejected, repressed, forgotten, and denied. And sex becomes the only means of getting that loving communion they seek. So, they become obsessive about it and feel like they need it right away because sex and love become the same for them. 

So, when a woman tells the truth about her survival agenda and it doesn't match what they've learned about women and what's worked for them sexually, they feel out of control and insecure as it reminds them that they are still in the same position relative to getting love from a woman... which is not a bad position to be in, but it feels that way to men with self-esteem issues.

And then because I share this uncomfortable truth of my reality, I become a projection screen for all their desires to get a woman to love and accept them. And I am mirroring to them that their strategies are making them lower value in my eyes (and most women's eyes, tbh) instead of making them higher value in my eyes and most women's eyes.

This is why those guys are trying to argue me out of it because on some level they feel like I'm rejecting them and women as a whole are rejecting them, even though I am just being very clear about what I won't accept in men in general. And they are trying really hard to maintain the view of women's sexuality that helps them feel more in control and safer from their feelings of low self-esteem. 

But you're right. It really isn't a conscious strategy on my part either. I'm just sharing what's true for me and what's worked well for me, so that other women can adopt these mindsets. 

My intuition does this sorting for me naturally because I've had enough experience to know what I want and what I don't want. And I can also tell the difference between a man wanting me in particular and wanting sex in general. It's really easy to spot as there are tons of red flags and green flags that can be noticed. 

And I don't give any time or energy to what I don't want because I have no sense of scarcity. And I also don't experience wanting a relationship without wanting the person first. So, I'm not itching to be with someone if they're not THE someone that I want.

It would be much harder if I really felt like I needed a relationship because then I would be scrounging for whoever I could get. 

But I am very much of the disposition that I'd rather seek a beautiful experience or simply go without. I don't feel the need to find something lukewarm just to fill a space in my life. 

Probably one of the most profound and empathetic post written in a long time. I see what you see.

Though, sometimes it is hard to keep this in mind, reading some of the stuff being said. 

Kudos to you for not getting triggered and staying so firmly grounded.