The most terrible pain

[peanutspathtotruth]

I decided to give the Osho Dynamic Meditation a try today, it's been on my list for quite some time. While I would love to hear your thoughts and experiences with that, I want to address a specific feeling which came up during the meditation:

For those who don't know, you go absolutely crazy in different ways for 30 minutes before you completely freeze for 15 minutes. The onset feeling reminded me a lot of the Kriya Yoga experiences I made a while ago (not practicing at the moment). The immense stillness and clarity that radiates to infinity, the silence.... powerful stuff. After about 10 minutes though, I felt a pain arising in my chest, where usually I only know the perfect bliss of love. My mind started to enter because I first thought it to be a physical pain - either my lung (still a bit ailing) or my heart. It got ever more intense and a terror started to build up. My mind came up with thoughts of maybe getting a heart attack any second. But why would that happen? I could allow this feeling to a good extend because of my hyper aware state and my willingness to allow everything to be. But this pain... I remembered that this is the pain I know from 5-MeO, from DMT, and even from weed when the fear of death would come up. This pain and the accompanying fear became so intense that I got nauseaus and eventually laid down before the time of this phase was over.

I'm still not sure about the nature of this pain, but it brought up such existential terror that I can only imagine it to be a deeply seated pain at the heart of separation. Very interesting. In the next phase, where you dance, sing, talk to yourself with love, I recognized that not only the pain and fear were present, but also intense feelings of guilt and abandonment. I attended to these feelings with love and curiosity - this was very healing, but it feels like the wound has just opened. 
This stuff is so fascinating to me - that a few minutes of this work can get one to such a point, without even a psychedelic. Looking forward to keep exploring.

I feel many will know this specific pain in the heart area, since even for me it was not new, just suppressed for a while. What are your experiences with it, your insights and healing journeys? 

[Gabith]

Thank you