Insecurity and fear about sexuality

[bejapuskas]

@Identity  Do you think she just really wants you to enjoy that blowjob she gives you? You might be judging yourself because you are not focusing on her while she is sucking your dick, but maybe she just really wants you to enjoy it man idk...

Idk if I am projecting here but I smell daddy issues. Have you two talked about how your families treat you and where you feel judged?

[Identity]

@bejapuskas Yeah, she really does want me to enjoy it. And I do to some degree. But it’s challenging for me to feel into my body and just enjoy the sensation. There is just a tendency to want to manage and control: should I come or not come? I should be liking it and showing her!

Instead of just letting go.

haha, where do you smell daddy issues, from my or her side?

Yeah, we do talk about our parents, our upbringing and trauma’s we picked up along the way. That being said, fully healing them is another thing though.

I’d say the relationship with my dad has improved tremendously the last couple years. Not perfect, but it’s quite good. From her side there are some deeper wounds.

[bejapuskas]

@Identity  Does she ever tell you that you can just come and it is fine? Do you feel self-conscious about coming too early? I think when you suck somebody's dick, you can feel their veins pulsating when they enjoy it. Your dick and heart do the job for you automatically But I totally get you. Maybe you can do some research about blow jobs. 

Maybe this is not connected to dad but I meant the effort to please the other constantly and trying to have them satisfied at all times, maybe fear of being abandoned or yelled at.