StarStruck

How come that girls can be ruthless against nice guys?

256 posts in this topic

I think even labeling someone a beta male is pretty insulting. I don't like that terminology at all.

It's like saying "Yeah, sure, alpha males may get a ton affection from women and a lot of sex, but in the end, beta males win in long term, because they get to be in a relationship with matured women! (*cough cough* after somebody already ran a train on them *cough cough*). So don't worry about being unatractive! Just be you!"

Like, that's the type of shit I would probably slap somebody for?

Combination of strong (or whatever other quality you link with attractivness) and monogamous is ultimately what every man should be striving for.

 

Edited by Peter Miklis

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11 hours ago, bejapuskas said:

saw the comment Jacob Morres is talking about and I see how it could sound like something you were not intending to say. Maybe provide more context the first time you post? Context is always necessary. I mean I know incels will call you out for both things, either you confirm their BS or you are hypocritical

im not an incel dawg nor is my philosophy BS. i can be wrong at times but that doesnt make it bs. also her philosophy isn't like "more than" mine. it's on the same playing field imo

Edited by Jacob Morres

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@Preety_India Don´t listen to him. He cannot articulate his thoughts

2 hours ago, Preety_India said:

Alpha can be strong and they use this strength either to protect or bully.

And how do they protect? Mostly by bullying others - those who threaten or offend or whatever a woman. So that for a particular woman this is a protector-type of Alpha and for the others - the abuser. But it doesn´t work this way, the abuser is the abuser. So that a woman doesn´t need to wonder one day why this nice protector has turned to be a bully on her. 

Let´s take Hitler. the Germans thought, he would protect them, it looked like that in the beginning. At the end Germany was even more destroyed that any  other country that Hitler bullyed to protect his beloved Germany. Speaking about your love to Putin ? Does he protect his people? Does he protect anybody?

Generally speaking a woman that has come out of cave doesn´t need any protector. It´s a residual cave-part of brain that thinks she does. And causes her more often misery than well-being.

 

Edited by Hulia

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2 hours ago, Peter Miklis said:

I think even labeling someone a beta male is pretty insulting. I don't like that terminology at all.

It's like saying "Yeah, sure, alpha males may get a ton affection from women and a lot of sex, but in the end, beta males win in long term, because they get to be in a relationship with matured women! (*cough cough* after somebody already ran a train on them *cough cough*). So don't worry about being unatractive! Just be you!"

Like, that's the type of shit I would probably slap somebody for?

Combination of strong (or whatever other quality you link with attractivness) and monogamous is ultimately what every man should be striving for.

 

So labeling someone a beta male is insulting, but talking about women being ran on is okay?

 


Be cautious when a naked person offers you a t-shirt. - African proverb

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4 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

So labeling someone a beta male is insulting, but talking about women being ran on is okay?

 

Don't act like you did not understand what I was trying to say. Sure, I could have said it a little nicer, but nitpicking little details isn't productive at all.

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12 minutes ago, Peter Miklis said:

Don't act like you did not understand what I was trying to say. Sure, I could have said it a little nicer, but nitpicking little details isn't productive at all.

I didn't write this answer to get in an argument with you....

And this is not some "nitpicking".

There is a recurring pattern of certain male holding this kind of believes and you obviously have it as well. So this is not just a little detail.

Highlighting this contradiction was not designed to harm you nor getting you defensive but to help you see this double standard and maybe look into it. That said, it's not going to happen if you brush it off.


Be cautious when a naked person offers you a t-shirt. - African proverb

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@Etherial Cat You know what, as I'm re-reading my post, I suppose I did slut shame a little bit. However, I just cannot help but feel that any person who's been cassually sleeping with too many people (no matter what gender) is just unfit for any relationship, pretty much pernamently. This is what I believe. This is what I see when I examine people like that. They're mental wrecks inside.

So, yeah, I assumed woman who's sleeping around too much has low relationship value. In that way, I slut shamed, I'll admit. But, I think of men the same way.

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On 09/07/2021 at 2:58 AM, knakoo said:

If you had to recommend one or a few of Leo's videos, which one(s) would you choose ?

I really like this video.  So If I had to pick up only one, I'd chose it ^_^

This one gave me a a natural provisory enlightenment. So I'm particularly fond of it.

--

But generally speaking, I would say that his portfolio of video is of such quality that they almost all deserve to be watched. At least the most recent ones (up to 3-4 years ago). :)

The ones which are worth skipping are those that were obviously done in a different era and have too much Orange in it.

On 09/07/2021 at 2:58 AM, knakoo said:

Do you have other "spiritual teachers" to recommend ?

Yes. Yourself. ^_^ Follow your inner Guru.

Nowadays, I look for spiritual teachers who resonate especially with me and bring out my own knowledge. The more I find them beautiful, the more I know that their style of teaching has a piece of who I am under the veil of ego...

In my case, I resonate with a triumvirate of Love, Truth and Consciousness.

And at the specific moment, I have a strong focus on actuality, a lot of my consciousness work is directed at the now itself. So you won't be surprised if I tell you that my favorite spiritual teacher is Eckhart Tolle (and he has always been anyway- his teachings are simple but effective). :D

But literally, everyone is my teacher. I am not attached to one of them in particular. I diversify my sources through space, time and medium.

That said, youtube is certainely very convenient. And there I like the videos made by Rupert Spira, Adyashanti, Francis Lucille, Marianne Wiliamson, Tara Brach, Matt Kahn, etc. I like the fact that they have a lot of video on common contemporary issues. So you've got a good pool of Q&A coming from them. And lately, I have also started listening to Nahm's videos.

 


Be cautious when a naked person offers you a t-shirt. - African proverb

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25 minutes ago, Peter Miklis said:

@Etherial Cat You know what, as I'm re-reading my post, I suppose I did slut shame a little bit. However, I just cannot help but feel that any person who's been cassually sleeping with too many people (no matter what gender) is just unfit for any relationship, pretty much pernamently. This is what I believe. This is what I see when I examine people like that. They're mental wrecks inside.

So, yeah, I assumed woman who's sleeping around too much has low relationship value. In that way, I slut shamed, I'll admit. But, I think of men the same way.

Yes. There are right reason to be wary of someone's sexual past, as it can have ripple in the present moment. But it all depends on context. 

It's not uncommon for people to change. It would be silly to miss on great matches because of being severe with such standards. :)

Maybe an underlying reason is that you wish for someone to have a special relationship with you mostly and not with tons of other people?


Be cautious when a naked person offers you a t-shirt. - African proverb

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37 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

Maybe an underlying reason is that you wish for someone to have a special relationship with you mostly and not with tons of other people?

Yeah, I guess you could say that.? I'm bit insecure even, I'd say. Not that I lack in anything, it's just that I like the validation that having a good relationship with one woman brings. Emphasis on "good" though.

41 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

It's not uncommon for people to change. It would be silly to miss on great matches because of being severe with such standards. :)

I don't think it's neccessary to have "I only date virgins" type of standard, obviously most people sleep around a bit, nothing wrong with that. That being said though, I believe there's a point where it becomes too much, like it's clear that he/she is trying to compensate for something and fill a hole, or just has a problem with controling his/her own impulses, or just has nothing else going on in his/her life other than fucking and partying. It's gotta be one of those things, I feel. I noticed all of these things when observing these types of people.

Maybe it's better to just let things flow, I don't know? I am a virgin after all, with not much experience, although not really due to being unwanted, but moreso just due to overly filltering and blocking chicks out of my life? so maybe I shouldn't make too many assumptions.

 

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3 hours ago, Hulia said:

@Preety_India Don´t listen to him. He cannot articulate his thoughts

And how do they protect? Mostly by bullying others - those who threaten or offend or whatever a woman. So that for a particular woman this is a protector-type of Alpha and for the others - the abuser. But it doesn´t work this way, the abuser is the abuser. So that a woman doesn´t need to wonder one day why this nice protector has turned to be a bully on her. 

Let´s take Hitler. the Germans thought, he would protect them, it looked like that in the beginning. At the end Germany was even more destroyed that any  other country that Hitler bullyed to protect his beloved Germany. Speaking about your love to Putin ? Does he protect his people? Does he protect anybody?

Generally speaking a woman that has come out of cave doesn´t need any protector. It´s a residual cave-part of brain that thinks she does. And causes her more often misery than well-being.

 

Don't want to bother myself explaining.Have my lady for that.

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@Zeroguy

 

@Hulia  You know personal development.

It means in many ways raising above average atleast.Including accurate discernement , wise choices,self betterment etc.

Women needs shit test to remove unsuitable guys or what she considers as such.

These guys shouldn't cry .Accept it ,play and fundamentally who gives a shit so much pussy out there.

Abusers.Emotionally driven and reactive man .How that can be Alpha ?

Could explain how that Protector as you call it actually becomes abuser and what leads to that but it is waste of time.

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@StarStruck

On 7/7/2021 at 5:40 PM, StarStruck said:

It is so hard to understand this perspective. How come they treat nice guys as trash and dick heads as kings?

With girls treating guys nice I mean answering their text, being polite and having the dignity to say they are not interested. Instead they just ghost you and just leave you out to dry.

I talked to some female friends about this and they subscribe to what I said. Guys are much nicer towards girls in this regard.

My theory is this: girls have more power because they chose, and nice guys who don't have power get treated as trash; there is no reason to treat nice guys with respect and dignity.

   Yes, it is hard for a guy to understand the perspective of a girl. Some do treat nice guys as trash, but some don't treat them like trash, and some treat them differently than trash. Some do treat dick heads as kings because at that time they relied on them for security. However, some don't, some now can leave or treat them differently otherwise.

   Some do treat them nicely, and some don't, sometimes out of spite, but sometimes they could be busy doing other things as women nowadays have a life.

   Keep in mind the female friends who talked to you about this are in your social circle. Have you talked to other women outside of your immediate social circle? Immediate social circles tend to just echo whatever is in the in group.

   Girls have more power is context sensitive. This might be the case in some parts of 1st world democracies, but not so in 2nd to 3rd world democracies and other forms of societies.

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The need for being right and proving people wrong is a form of violence according to Eckhart

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On 8/7/2021 at 2:40 AM, Lucas-fgm said:

I don't get why these guys whine so much about heterosexual women's behavior. Just accept the way they are. I don't see any problems with women's disdain for " nice" guys. As Leo said it's just their survival agenda.

The problem isn't the rejection itself. The problem is that women SAY they want a nice guy but then proceed to go for the asshole!

My problem is not with women going for assholes! Go for whoever the hell you want. Your loss, I don't give a shit. But, the problem is when they say they want a nice guy and then go for the asshole. That's low-integrity behavior from women. That's women stringing along the nice guy.

On a certain level, I do get the self-worth issue. If women did admit they liked assholes, then the nice guy would cast them aside and go for a woman who does like nice guys.


"Do not pray for an easy life. Pray for the strength to endure a difficult one." - Bruce Lee

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15 minutes ago, Parththakkar12 said:

The problem isn't the rejection itself. The problem is that women SAY they want a nice guy but then proceed to go for the asshole!

My problem is not with women going for assholes! Go for whoever the hell you want. Your loss, I don't give a shit. But, the problem is when they say they want a nice guy and then go for the asshole. That's low-integrity behavior from women. That's women stringing along the nice guy.

On a certain level, I do get the self-worth issue. If women did admit they liked assholes, then the nice guy would cast them aside and go for a woman who does like nice guys.

Everytime I came across a nice guy, I found him to be very manipulative. 

He was a nice guy but more like a namesake nice guy, just trying to get his way into my pants. Not really a nice guy, not what I would consider a nice guy.

More like a manipulative hypocrite.

Some guys were extra nice that I felt it was creepy. 

If you get what I mean.

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

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4 hours ago, Parththakkar12 said:

The problem isn't the rejection itself. The problem is that women SAY they want a nice guy but then proceed to go for the asshole!

My problem is not with women going for assholes! Go for whoever the hell you want. Your loss, I don't give a shit. But, the problem is when they say they want a nice guy and then go for the asshole. That's low-integrity behavior from women. That's women stringing along the nice guy.

On a certain level, I do get the self-worth issue. If women did admit they liked assholes, then the nice guy would cast them aside and go for a woman who does like nice guys.

Just become the asshole

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@Parththakkar12 Because it is not socially correct to say i am attracted to narcissistic sociopaths. If someone told that you to you, you would feel like there is something wrong with her. Therefore, dating fantasies are created. A colossal cope.

It is true that guys are honest about being attracted to physical features however those things are not negative traits but just neutral. Being narcissistic, very independent to the point of giving 0 shits about others , assertive, dominant etc can be great for the individual that has these attributes in aiding his survival but it harms society as a whole. Most issues in the world have been caused through history by these very traits. Meanwhile a big set of tits harms no one. 

Edited by Karmadhi

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31 minutes ago, Karmadhi said:

Meanwhile a big set of tits harms no one. 

???

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