How come that girls can be ruthless against nice guys?

[Jacob Morres]

4 hours ago, Etherial Cat said:

I've read a lot of your post and threads. You don't seem particularly "nice". 

Men who are genuinely nice do not post video like that:

Or

That's not being nice. In fact, that's even the contrary. You are literally advocating for treating them like crap.

I also remember reading that you like to fuck girls like you want to punish them or something. 

You can't seriously think that these posts are genuinely loving toward females, and are not symptomatic to a deeper problem? If you'd work on this, and really get to the bottom of your emotions toward women, you could certainly see huge improvement.

It's very likely that your intense crave for women stem from the fact that you are missing your own feminine side. So you look for it outwards. But it might come off as needy due to the intense suffering hiding behind.

If you'd feel more relaxed thanks to your own feminine side being reintegrated, you would likely no longer send a vibe of expectations, anger and neediness towards girls.

I don't thats a fair argument to judge this by. I'm sure he didn't have these judgements before and his success with women wasn't much different 

Edited July 7, 2021 by Jacob Morres

[fopylo]

1 hour ago, billiesimon said:

Be unapologetic about being feminine or soft or lighthearted. The less you care about being attractive to them, the more you become attractive.

But you kinda contradict yourself because you just said that lower SD stage girls will not be attracted to this. Most girls are not super evolved psychologically. Basically most girls will go away from you while you still attract girls, but less

[Leo Gura]

51 minutes ago, StarStruck said:

If I give my phone number to a fat chick and I change my mind about her, I wouldn't ghost her, I would have the dignity to her and explain to her I changed my mind about her and have the respect to explain.

I'm not blaming or something. I'm trying to understand these bitches.

Giving you her number is her polite way of telling you to fuck off without endangering her life.

[RendHeaven]

I'm really not a fan of this "nice guy" vs "asshole" framing.

These words are masks for what's really going on.

You can be nice as fuck and simultaneously sexy. You can treat every woman as a queen and have your cock worshipped. (I recommend this)

On the flip side, you can also be a degenerate asshole who repels women.

The vice versa (common notion) can also be coincidentally true. It's possible that you can be "nice guy" trash or "asshole" king.

So fundamentally, your "niceness" has no effect whatsoever on your attractiveness

Stop associating "niceness" with attractiveness whatsoever! There is no causal relationship.

If you're spiritually inclined, strive to be nice. It's good practice for getting in touch with the Love that you are.

If you're concerned about your attractiveness, focus ENTIRELY on improving your sub-communications: tone of voice, eye contact, posture, smile, looseness, balancing your edge and humor, clarity of intent, freedom from outcome, embracing sexuality, holding warm sensual energy and gently teasing her into it, leading, being trustworthy, showing her your presence and attentiveness through small gestures in non-qualifying ways, learn to "read the room," feel her internal energies and apply pressure-on pressure-off in ways that make her feel good, have a beautiful rich internal world as an ever-present backdrop from which you extend an invitation of adventure.

You're welcome, that's everything you'll ever need to learn if your goal is to have women with soaked panties fighting over your cock.

Notice that none of that stuff - the stuff that actually matters - says anything about niceness.

You can master the above list and be a saint or a devil. Or you can be a total noob at the above list and be a saint or a devil.

So please y'all, drop the terminology of "nice guys finish last." That's like saying "men with cousins finish last." The claim just lacks substance. Whether or not you have a cousin doesn't mean shit regarding your attractiveness, just as your "niceness" doesn't mean shit.

How about this for some nuance:

Guys with shit tones of voice, shit eye contact, shit posture, no smile, body tension, no balance in edge or humor, no clarity of intent, total attachment to outcome, rejection of sexuality, cold calculating energy, inability to tease, inability to lead; men who are untrustworthy, who have no presence or attentiveness who self-qualify, who cannot read the room or feel internal energies, who don't have any regard to making the girl feel good, who do not have a rich internal world - these guys FINISH LAST. In fact, they don't finish at all. They get ruthlessly destroyed by women for being sexually repulsive yet acting entitled to sex.

Edited July 8, 2021 by RendHeaven

[Karmadhi]

@Leo Gura Thing is women have it as easy to get a relationship as it is to get sex. Women get proposed by guys all the time to be their girlfriend, not seduces to sex by some creep. Most girls have no issue getting a boyfriend to commit to them as long as that guy is not some player kind of personna that is too rare to consider. It is true that guys value sex a lot more than girls do however usually they will propose to a girl they like in some way so the girl has no issue getting a guy as a partner. At least pre 30 this is how it happens. Only thing is that girls only consider like top 10 percent of guys worthy of them so all those offers they get are turned down and when that 1/100 guy ignores them they get depressed and upset. Seen this shit with so many feamles in my life it is not even funny.

[Karmadhi]

@Lucas-fgm I agree with you. Guys sexality is equally fucked up and shallow.  The only thing which i believe frustrates guys a lot is that females since young are properly told what guys like. Meanwhile guys are not taught properly at all what females like. Just see what females in this self development forumn say, they deny all and say females want good kind guys. Imagine being raised all your life believing you should act X way and then that whole reality crumbling when you actually start applying X and also getting a couple of hard heartbreaks from it. If guys were properly taught what attracts females from a young age like females are properly taught what guys like then there would be no need for such threads. 

A second reason is that due to comfort life these days guys have become soft and lost side with their more ruthless part. Basically creating stage red shadows, which makes them meek and weak. In the past life developed you properly to be a strong man due to how brutal it was, these days guys need to do that work themselves in a society that heavily discourages them to do so. You are basically going against the wind and it is difficult process. People do not like to do difficult things hence they complain.

[Leo Gura]

26 minutes ago, Karmadhi said:

@Leo Gura Thing is women have it as easy to get a relationship as it is to get sex. Women get proposed by guys all the time to be their girlfriend, not seduces to sex by some creep. Most girls have no issue getting a boyfriend to commit to them as long as that guy is not some player kind of personna that is too rare to consider. It is true that guys value sex a lot more than girls do however usually they will propose to a girl they like in some way so the girl has no issue getting a guy as a partner. At least pre 30 this is how it happens. Only thing is that girls only consider like top 10 percent of guys worthy of them so all those offers they get are turned down and when that 1/100 guy ignores them they get depressed and upset. Seen this shit with so many feamles in my life it is not even funny.

You have no clue the challenges women face.

[Karmadhi]

@Leo Gura @Leo Gura Getting pumped and dumped by players is not a challenge in my book. Stay away from players and you will not get abused nor pumped and dumped nor dumped for younger/hotter girls. Problem solved. I tell guys all the time to avoid spoiled bitchy hot girls and not just go for pure looks so same logic applies for guys too. Be selective and not go for pure animalistic attraction like a fucking moron and then complain when you get burned. Have some wisdom on who you choose to date, this applies for both sexes in different ways.

If there are other issues you can maybe explain them instead of being obtuse about it. Maybe a short thread because most guys here unfortunately are too self biased to see it. I remember you mentioning being abused, pumped and dumped and dumped for younger girls. In the domain of dating that is. If you go outside of dating then yeah it is another story and it is fucked up (fear of rape, giving birth, periods, emotional flunctuations, etc).

[Raptorsin7]

32 minutes ago, RendHeaven said:

I'm really not a fan of this "nice guy" vs "asshole" framing.

These words are masks for what's really going on.

You can be nice as fuck and simultaneously sexy. You can treat every woman as a queen and have your cock worshipped. (I recommend this)

On the flip side, you can also be a degenerate asshole who repels women.

The vice versa (common notion) can also be coincidentally true. It's possible that you can be "nice guy" trash or "asshole" king.

So fundamentally, your "niceness" has no effect whatsoever on your attractiveness

Stop associating "niceness" with attractiveness whatsoever! There is no causal relationship.

If you're spiritually inclined, strive to be nice. It's good practice for getting in touch with the Love that you are.

If you're concerned about your attractiveness, focus ENTIRELY on improving your sub-communications: tone of voice, eye contact, posture, smile, looseness, balancing your edge and humor, clarity of intent, freedom from outcome, embracing sexuality, holding warm sensual energy and gently teasing her into it, leading, being trustworthy, showing her your presence and attentiveness through small gestures in non-qualifying ways, learn to "read the room," feel her internal energies and apply pressure-on-pressure off in ways that make her feel good, have a beautiful rich internal world as an ever-present backdrop from which you extend an invitation of adventure.

You're welcome, that's everything you'll ever need to learn if your goal is to have women with soaked panties fighting over your cock.

Notice that none of that stuff - the stuff that actually matters - says anything about niceness.

You can master the above list and be a saint or a devil. Or you can be a total noob at the above list and be a saint or a devil.

So please y'all, drop the terminology of "nice guys finish last." That's like saying "men with cousins finish last." The claim just lacks substance. Whether or not you have a cousin doesn't mean shit regarding your attractiveness, just as your "niceness" doesn't mean shit.

How about this for some nuance:

Guys with shit tones of voice, shit eye contact, shit posture, no smile, body tension, no balance in edge or humor, no clarity of intent, total attachment to outcome, rejection of sexuality, cold detached energy, inability to tease, inability to lead; men who are untrustworthy, who have no presence or attentiveness who self-qualify, who cannot read the room or feel internal energies, who don't have any regard to making the girl feel good, who do not have a rich internal world - these guys FINISH LAST. In fact, they don't finish at all. They get ruthlessly destroyed by women for being sexually repulsive yet feeling entitled to sex.

This is a good point.

 

[Jacob Morres]

@Karmadhi yeah instead of looks i am currently just thinking about the vibe i have with the girl. what do i feel? do i feel good? am i enjoying her precense? is she enjoying mine? do i sense authenticity? is she a good person? does she have good integrity?  

i'm still refining these questions though so bear with me 

-

@RendHeaven

even under the sub communications i think the identity and self-confidence is important. the outer and inner are connected but the inner is half the battle. Like there's a difference between being confident and behaving confident.

i also want to stress to avoid the trap of not loving and integrating your own weakness and insecurities. they are all valid and worthy and there is nothing wrong with them. because i think i fell under this and the trap of behaving alpha can sometimes make you deny parts of yourself   

 

Edited July 8, 2021 by Jacob Morres

[Karmadhi]

@Jacob Morres Good! This is the sort of wisdom people should have in dating. Not go for people based on chimp brain monkey feelings. If people had the same dumbness when picking food as they do when picking partners then it would be called America. hahahahhahaha

[Arcangelo]

 female/human nature

[lmfao]

I'm mostly just stumbling into this sub-forum, and I have nothing to add. I read some of the stuff here maybe to absorb a bit knowledge but it's casual and just random scrolling since it's not helping me. 

I have a lot of self-actualisation work in general to do. In that sense I have a different overall vision in mind other then "how many bitches can I get? ". Although that's undeniably a thing which seems funny. But things regarding family, friendship and socialising in general are basics I'm concerned with. 

 

This meme of nice guy vs strong is pretty interesting, I've run out of thoughts about it. It's maybe the case that my personality oscillates between dickhead and gentle person, but I don't even take that thought seriously now. 

 

I just have to remind myself that I'm inventing stories or narratives for things I don't understand.

For example, after I was done praying today, I felt a shift in my awareness and felt more "warm" and loving. When I feel like this, I'm a more polite and friendly person. 

On the other hand, yesterday I felt very different."Shadow possessed", testosterone fueled as hell, selfish, impulsive, horny. 

I'm finding it hard to not call myself something other than Dr jekyll and Mr Hyde with this all. I can only keep going I suppose. 

I have to discard all images of what high or low consciousness is {ie high consciousness meaning you're a doormat}, or images of what a "man" ought to be. Only then can I stop being confused. 

Self-actualization and consciousness work, two way street I have to remember, not exclusive 

 

Edit: Alright I think part of the answer has come to me. If my consciousness elevates and gets warmer, that has associations of childishness and innocence to me. More specifically, it connects me to my emotional memory of the past which I'm disconnected from in a dissociated way. 

Therefore, part of my politeness and betaness when my consciousness is warmer is due to me running on the program of being a child. [I know that even this story I'm giving now doesn't suffice completely, but this revelation popped into my mind] 

I have dissociation to my past and past personality, likely due to trauma/hurt I blocked off and couldn't face. So it's all apart of finding more and more unconscious aspects to myself

Edited July 8, 2021 by lmfao

[Peter Miklis]

Reading some of these posts that are giving guys a list of items of what to improve to attract women, I have to wonder, how's it working for you guys? Are you actually taking your own advice? Is your "cock getting worshipped"??

Don't get me wrong, I'm not anti-learner, it's just that I think this shit isn't that complicated. For example, I don't think smiling or lack of smiling is important at all. Sounds like an uneccessary micromanagment.

Just be a cool dude, have shit going on in your life, be positive, chill, and give zero F's. Be natural, don't try to force anything. And most importantly, go out.

Edited July 8, 2021 by Peter Miklis

[Peter Miklis]

@StarStruck One thing here I find odd about you, why are you refering to women as enemies or opponents? That's not a healthy mindset dude, gotta change that

Edited July 8, 2021 by Peter Miklis

[something_else]

@Karmadhi You sound kinda toxic. I can't put my finger on why. I think you've spent far too much time in your head thinking about these things, because I notice myself having similar thoughts to you during periods of time where I've done that.

Especially negative thoughts and broad generalisations, your mind is great at generating them for you and convincing you that they're true.

[Karmadhi]

When you work on yourself and still denied love from girls it can make you a bit bitter in these situations. I can assure you in normal life i am a lot more positive and uplifiting, usually my toxicity comes about in forums in threads like these. I actively try not to influence my real life

[Leo Gura]

38 minutes ago, Karmadhi said:

When you work on yourself and still denied love from girls it can make you a bit bitter in these situations.

That sword cuts both ways.

The problem is not the girls, it's your attachment to needing their love.

[Peter Miklis]

7 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

 

The problem is not the girls, it's your attachment to needing their love.

That's very true. Unfortunatelly, it's extremelly hard to not seek validation. That desire runs deep in all of us.

[Leo Gura]

13 minutes ago, Peter Miklis said:

That's very true. Unfortunatelly, it's extremelly hard to not seek validation. That desire runs deep in all of us.

Don't forget that it runs in girls too. Perhaps even more so than in you.