Help: How do I talk to a dear friend who's starting to harm herself?

[assx95]

The situation is this: I am in Second Year of MBA in India in one of the reputed management institutes (so it's not like the situation is entirely hopeless), but she failed first year, and has to repeat the entire first year again. But she's gotten into more trouble, cause she was barred from placements. In India, the colleges provide placement as well. So the uncertainty for her is very high, and she sees no point in studying MBA again, if she gets no placement, but doesn't have any other plan as well. 

She's fortunately, quite young, 21. But she said she doesn't remember what she did yesterday to herself, and is talking about doing bad things to herself. She has some hope that the placement committee would allow her for placements, but I talked to them, and they were like- No, we have already decided. How do I even talk to her? She's paid the first year fees again, which is nearly $12000 US dollars, which is huge in the Indian context. Also, the job market in India is quite harsh. And she fears she might not get anywhere in life. 

Yesterday, I dreamt that me and her were sitting on the edge of a building and she lost balance, and fell from a height, I jumped to save her as well, but then it didn't end well. I have no idea what I could do to help her. This might not even be the right subforum, but I am typing in panic. 

[okulele]

@assx95 Try to calm down around the topic. When you totally relax your mind and body while holding the issue in mind, you will have a much better chance of coming up with a healthy solution. It might well be difficult to calm down with this topic in mind, but you can do it. Use journal to get your thoughts about it in front of your eyes, this will bring more awareness in and will help you to calm down. A calm and clear mind can find the answer

[ll Ontology ll]

@assx95 The language is based on her language, the emotions are based on your shared experience but it must be grounded in the sense of trust. Whatever it is that creates that trust is what you should be basing everything around. This is because our consciousness determines trust based on the perception of consistency and persistence in that consistency relative to safety and comfort, and I mean that in the microsecond sense. This is not just in relation to other human beings but literally any label we put on reality, it goes to the heart of why she feels unsafe and uncomfortable internally because she hasn't had those ingredients modelled to her in the right way. Abstractly, it is all about time. Time couples to and explains the ordering of the psychological phenomena that identify to and from consciousness that gives consciousnesses perception of reality as an identity item right to its whole framework that we denote as structure (associations like "world view" pointing outwardly from consciousness, and pointing towards the self, "self"). This is why you must have compassion, because you and billions of other humans simply don't understand how nuanced human psychology is, its totally hyper-indexed. Compassion is a relative tool relative to the ordering of an individuals consciousness within time. 

This is why I struggle to help people but why I would be amazing at it if I had the patience. No explanation needed of course.

Edited July 5, 2021 by ll Ontology ll