How To Love

[Raptorsin7]

How do I experience Love. I had an insight the other day and I believe a path to happiness is to fully love and accept whatever arises in your experience at any time. I can notice certain sensations and feelings present, and I can tell that I am being loving and accepting of everything present in my direct experience.

I want to fully love whatever arises, but I am not a loving person so I can't tell if I am doing it right.

I can shift to a mindset of nurture and somewhat caring, and I can feel the difference, but it still feels like I am not accepting my direct experience to the best of my ability.

[erik8lrl]

What is the experience of love to you? And what does it mean to be a loving person to you? 

[Zeroguy]

2 hours ago, Raptorsin7 said:

How do I experience Love. I had an insight the other day and I believe a path to happiness is to fully love and accept whatever arises in your experience at any time. I can notice certain sensations and feelings present, and I can tell that I am being loving and accepting of everything present in my direct experience.

I want to fully love whatever arises, but I am not a loving person so I can't tell if I am doing it right.

I can shift to a mindset of nurture and somewhat caring, and I can feel the difference, but it still feels like I am not accepting my direct experience to the best of my ability.

For how long you will search for not actual problems to fix.Stop with that game.Go create go dream man.You beautiful guy I don't get you.You are awesome much more then you currently beleive.

[Zeroguy]

Love is effortless and spontaneous.So try or there is really nothing to fix or try at all.

[WelcometoReality]

4 hours ago, Raptorsin7 said:

I can shift to a mindset of nurture and somewhat caring, and I can feel the difference, but it still feels like I am not accepting my direct experience to the best of my ability.

If you go into the not accepting what's there? What makes acceptance hard?

[Nahm]

7 hours ago, Raptorsin7 said:

How do I experience Love.

Mindfully enjoy the intrinsic goodness of kindness & appreciation for all things & everyone. Know that feeling. Note it. Make a point to.

Spend your time, energy & money helping others. As thoughts arise as to why you can’t or don’t actually want to, breathe & relax through the letting go of such though patterns which arise contrary to your intention. See more & more that it is not possible to love yourself, without simultaneously inherently contributing to the goodness of all.  Delight in reality coming to life. Enjoy the unthinkable synchronicities and serendipities. 

Practice self inquiry. If thoughts arise about how it doesn’t work for you, let them go by focusing instead on feeling breathing in the stomach. (Not just any self inquiry, that self inquiry).

As self referential dualistic thoughts arise, (how do I experience love) bring the mind to rest again & again by relaxing and focusing instead on feeling the breathing from the stomach. No longer pretend that a thought is going to answer this. It’ll always be ‘just another thought’, and love can not be thunk. Focus on breathing from the stomach as if that’s where ‘the answer’ would be found. As if there are entire universes of love-answers to be discovered there. 

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I had an insight the other day and I believe a path to happiness is to fully love and accept whatever arises in your experience at any time. I can notice certain sensations and feelings present, and I can tell that I am being loving and accepting of everything present in my direct experience.

Bring beliefs about paths to happiness, as if in some other time or place, to rest in the same manor. 

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I want to fully love whatever arises, but I am not a loving person so I can't tell if I am doing it right.

Brings beliefs about who you are, what ‘kind of person’ you are to rest as well. Bring thoughts of judgement, of right or wrong, and a you doing it, to rest as well. 

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I can shift to a mindset of nurture and somewhat caring, and I can feel the difference, but it still feels like I am not accepting my direct experience to the best of my ability.

The more the mind is brought to peaceful rest again & again, the more sensitively self referential thoughts and self judgmental thoughts are felt. The more they are felt, the more they are realized to be discordant, the less they are believed, the less they are fed attention, the better you feel, the more you awaken the common sense. 

[gettoefl]

sending you some love today with a pretty song x

 

[WaveInTheOcean]

9 hours ago, Raptorsin7 said:

How do I experience Love.

By letting go

Like for real.

Even letting go of wanting to exp Love.

You have to lose your mind if you want to really love.

How do one lose his mind?

You go DO whatever you are afraid of.

9 hours ago, Raptorsin7 said:

.I want to fully love whatever arises, but I am not a loving person so I can't tell if I am doing it right.

So many thoughts. If you say you are not loving person, you aren't.

But who decides what a loving person is?

You. There is only you bro.

This is YOUR dream. Not somebody elses.

9 hours ago, Raptorsin7 said:

I can shift to a mindset of nurture and somewhat caring, and I can feel the difference, but it still feels like I am not accepting my direct experience to the best of my ability.

Who's ability ... ? Let go.

[Raptorsin7]

22 hours ago, erik8lrl said:

What is the experience of love to you? And what does it mean to be a loving person to you? 

I don't know what the experience of love is. I think being a loving person means to be caring and accepting, but I don't know if this is love.

I always thought love was something visceral that could be felt and couldn't be mistaken. Like if I experienced love I assume I would know for sure and I wouldn't be this uncertain about it.

 

[Raptorsin7]

20 hours ago, Zeroguy said:

For how long you will search for not actual problems to fix.Stop with that game.Go create go dream man.You beautiful guy I don't get you.You are awesome much more then you currently beleive.

I will search until I resolve the issue. I have experienced a version of myself that far exceeds where I'm at right now in terms of how I feel, my perceptions of the world, my suffering, abilities etc. I want to be at my best before I go out in the world and create something. 

I believe i am not operating as well as I could, and until I resolve this gap I will keep seeking.

I want to experience my life as amazing, beautiful etc... I just don't experience that right now.

For example, I suck(relative to people to who are very good) at online games, but when I peaked on LSD i felt a noticeable shift in my performance. That's what I want to do, and I think Love is how i get there.

 

[RendHeaven]

23 hours ago, Raptorsin7 said:

but I am not a loving person

what.

[Raptorsin7]

2 minutes ago, RendHeaven said:

what.

What

[RendHeaven]

who the hell told you that lol

[Raptorsin7]

@RendHeaven I mean that I don't feel a deep joy, bliss, etc about my life.

Like I want to love my life, and experience it as amazing but I currently don't.

If I am a loving person right now, then I want something better than love haha

[Raptorsin7]

16 hours ago, Nahm said:

Spend your time, energy & money helping others. As thoughts arise as to why you can’t or don’t actually want to, breathe & relax through the letting go of such though patterns which arise contrary to your intention. See more & more that it is not possible to love yourself, without simultaneously inherently contributing to the goodness of all.  Delight in reality coming to life. Enjoy the unthinkable synchronicities and serendipities. 

If I am singularly focusing on helping myself become loving then technically I am investing my own ability to contribute to the goodness of all.

I see your point about learning to appreciate etc and recognize the feeling.

In my meditations recently i've been trying to practice being gentle, compassionate, and just whatever comes to mind when I think of how to love myself and I notice a difference in how I feel.

When I imagine a bigger version of myself comforting myself as if i was a child i can feel a noticable positive difference in how I feel.

[erik8lrl]

@Raptorsin7 Have you ever cried because you are so touched when watching a movie or listening to music? 

[Raptorsin7]

@erik8lrl Not cried, but there are certain movie scenes or songs that touch me deeply and it feels close to bliss.

I've had incredible blissful experiences on psychidelics and it seemed to come from a deep acceptance of reality and dropping judgment, but I can't do this stuff at will. 

I have a tendency to suppress any crying that comes up. There have been more and more moments at work where I think of something and I get a bit teary eyed, but my immediate response is to cover it up and hide it.

[erik8lrl]

@Raptorsin7 You must have a lot of trauma or shadows that are preventing you from feeling things deeply. It's good that you are aware of it. To be more open to love, you need to forgive and heal yourself from all the pain you have experienced in life. 

[Raptorsin7]

On 7/4/2021 at 3:45 AM, WelcometoReality said:

If you go into the not accepting what's there? What makes acceptance hard?

I've actually made a lot of progress by switching my mindset in meditation towards accepting and loving everything that arises. 

But I still haven't managed to fully accept and experience the bliss and awesomeness from my peak psych trips.

Like last night i managed to accept myself to the point where feelings of disgust came up, and based on my past trips if I can go into the sensation of disgust there is a great relief and release that comes from going deeper and transcending disgust, but I ended up avoiding the sensation and just patting myself on the back for going so deep.

It just seems so simple, so when I can't do it i get frustrated. Like accept what is=happiness. But I still find myself here suffering and not enjoying what is.

[lark]

Maybe this will cheer you up

Edited July 5, 2021 by lark