Selflessness?

[Flowerfaeiry]

I know Leo has talked a bit about this. Do you have any ideas or resources in order to learn more?  

 

[4201]

Do you want your self to learn to be selfless or do you want to actually let go of the self?

Selflessness cannot be learned and there is nothing about it you need to know. Perhaps you could study people who has historically been considered selfless (Jesus, Buddha or any other) and try to mimick their behavior but that wouldn't be actual selfessness.

Actual selflessness is letting go of the self and we refer to this as enlightenment. In reality, you are already selfless and it's just a matter of stopping the thoughts who say "I am this" or "I am that".

 

This is made clear through meditation and alternatively, psychedelics can be a shortcut to get there early for the most impatient ones. Still a good book can facilitate this deconstruction by pointing to you the flaws in your reasoning that lead you to believe you have a self. There are tons of books about it and all with their own flavors.

Personally I really reasonate with Peter Ralston's Book of Not Knowing, in which he really extensively deconstruct the self and what it means to be you. The book works through your mind by pointing out the things you assume to be true that in reality you don't know. Once those basic assumptions taken away, your self can be understood for what it is leaving you to directly see your true nature. I would highly recommend this book.

Edited July 4, 2021 by 4201

[Flowerfaeiry]

2 hours ago, 4201 said:

Do you want your self to learn to be selfless or do you want to actually let go of the self?

Selflessness cannot be learned and there is nothing about it you need to know. Perhaps you could study people who has historically been considered selfless (Jesus, Buddha or any other) and try to mimick their behavior but that wouldn't be actual selfessness.

I want to learn to be less selfish. It's definitely something that can be learned, otherwise, how do people do it? 

[lmfao]

I'm doing A Course in Miracles, for any supposed connection to love/god. They give you an idea/exercise to apply every day, and there are 365 lessons. The lessons are in a workbook. I'm on lesson 12 rn, going through it slightly too slowly because it's so easy for me to forget to apply the exercise throughout the day. Just a few times during the day is fine. 

There's a pdf of it online for free, both textbook and workbook. https://holybooks.com/a-course-in-miracles/

Me personally, I bought the workbook, it's pretty sleek and nice. 

Reading the textbook on chapter 2 was really interesting for me. 

 

I don't know if I'll end up selfless since I see the path before me right now as one of antagonism and handling my animal nature, but this is all still good stuff to practice. 

[The0Self]

Devise ways and contemplate how to love more fully — or more precisely, be here to be in service to this infinite oneness’s awakening to love. Realize you aren’t here to have any tolerance for a lack mindset.

Yet,

Realize nothing needs to happen for this to be whole already. No one is really afraid to let go, they’re afraid of realizing this is always absolute-let-go already.

Edited July 4, 2021 by The0Self

[Flowerfaeiry]

38 minutes ago, lmfao said:

I'm doing A Course in Miracles, for any supposed connection to love/god.

I have that book. Cracked it open but have lots of resistance to the material. Not totally sure what that's about. 

Edited July 4, 2021 by Flowerfaeiry

[lmfao]

5 minutes ago, Flowerfaeiry said:

I have that book. Cracked it open but have lots of resistance to the material. Not totally sure what that's about. 

The workbook or the textbook do you have? I'm most just using the workbook. I don't know too much about the textbook, but I found it a bit polarising with resistance as well. 

It uses some very Christian and abrahamic language, and it felt weird to me because I was paranoid about all sorts of guilt and memory it bought up since I was raised Muslim.

A while back, I sent the following message to someone

_ _ _ _ _ _ 

I was reading through this book a woman wrote, "A Course in Miracles", it is essentially non-dualism with very interesting Christian language and framing. So there's a text side to the book and a workbook side. I was just reading the text out of curiosity. 

Due to Christian langauge and themes in it, it unexpectedly triggered or uncovered trauma or fears I had. Because I was a religious Muslim in the past and all that, it seems I have a lot of left over fears.

What I still have embedded in my psyche is a punitive and fearful worldview of god. Afraid that god will strike me down for sin. Afraid of being luciferean in my thinking lest god strike inflict vengeance.

Made me then realise that any notion of sin or karma engenders fear. You think you have sinned against god, and hence you see the world as a form of vengeance which will strike you at any moment. You walk around thinking the world always has strings attached, which is further elaboration of seeing the world as a place of vengeance. Because in the unconscious is shame about your very own existence and you don't think you're worthy to exist. 

Funnily enough, the material in ACIM is about undoing exactly that, and I initially projecting all of that onto ACIM. This is all described pretty well in this thing I found. https://facim.org/the-fear-of-god-and-compassion-for-others-part-1/

I was also afraid of being dragged into another belief system by reading all this due to all the phrasing, since I had been harmed by belief systems in the past. 

A general fear of mythology, images, stories, beliefs. Fear of being confused, being lost, fear of my own mind and fear of chaos.

The strange terminology of "Father", "Son", "Holy Spirit", etc made me all scared whilst reading, untill I saw this other quote in the book

"Since you believe that you are separate, Heaven presents itself to you as separate, too." 

_ _ _ 

So those were some of my reactions 

[erik8lrl]

Selflessness is selfishness. To be truly selfless, follow your heart and listen to your true nature. Something that might be selfless at the moment might turn out to be selfish in the future, and vise versa. To fulfill one's own need might be a selfish thing to do, but at the same time, one cannot be fully selfless until they have loved themselves fully. So the best way is to be, and follow your heart/intuition, for that is the will of infinite love/intelligence. It is all love. 

Edited July 4, 2021 by erik8lrl

[Flowerfaeiry]

@lmfao The textbook. Omg me too!! Except for me, Christian. So they use a lot of  those Christian terms, but then go directly against what the bible says and I was highly triggered. And yea, like you I was worried about getting into another belief system and as I kept reading I was like, is this book even worth it?? But so many people like it so I don't know...

[Flowerfaeiry]

8 minutes ago, erik8lrl said:

To fulfill one's own need might be a selfish thing to do, but at the same time, one cannot be fully selfless until they have loved themselves fully

That's one of the things to figure out.

[erik8lrl]

@Flowerfaeiry Yes, you must learn to love yourself fully. Become self-aware enough to heal all your shadows, and gain enough experience to know what things in life give you true fulfillment. Once you are healed fully and living life with purpose and love, then, like a glass that is full, you can share your love with others without expectations or desires. True unconditional love can only be given to others when you have given it to yourself.

[Alfonsoo]

@Flowerfaeiry Kill Your Self: Life AfterEgo

by: Dogo Barry

 

I wouldn't call this book a informative masterpiece, but there's something about t that just makes you warm, vulnerable and with a will to be less selfish. Like mystical poetry (its not literally poetry).

[Alfonsoo]

Just now, Alfonsoo said:

@Flowerfaeiry Kill Your Self: Life AfterEgo

by: Dogo Barry

 

I wouldn't call this book a informative masterpiece, but there's something about t that just makes you warm, vulnerable and with a will to be less selfish. Like mystical poetry (its not literally poetry).

Also, letting go plays a huge huge role in this. Daring Greatly by René Brown will solve that.

[asifarahim]

U need to do karma yoga. Karma yoga is all about being self less ,detaching your fruit of labour .if u r intrested read the book practice of karma yoga by sivanananda.but u need to be tactical and do karma yoga in certain fields. Dont do karma yoga in work and self help.ur performance will decrese.it take year. Of practice of the ideas in the book to be selflesss

[Flowerfaeiry]

30 minutes ago, Alfonsoo said:

@Flowerfaeiry Kill Your Self: Life AfterEgo

by: Dogo Barry

 

I wouldn't call this book a informative masterpiece, but there's something about t that just makes you warm, vulnerable and with a will to be less selfish. Like mystical poetry (its not literally poetry).

Thank you 

[Blackhawk]

@Flowerfaeiry My feeling is that.. judging by your profile picture.. you are probably already selfless enough. No one can be completely selfless anyway.

[WelcometoReality]

@Flowerfaeiry To become selfless you need to let go of selfish feelings like shame, fear and anger and transcend into unconditional love. It's all about surrender the self imo.

[Michael569]

5 hours ago, Flowerfaeiry said:

I want to learn to be less selfish. It's definitely something that can be learned, otherwise, how do people do it? 

Perhaps you need to be a little bit more selfish first to have the realisation of how hollow it really (like really feel that)  feels and you will naturally migrate towards being more selfless. One thing I found is helpful is to spend more time helping others or just pursuing some sort of vision of"better XYZ" and ideally channelling it into a life purpose. 

But in the end we are all selfish because survival means being selfish, naturally there are degrees of that but ultimate and absolutely selflessness, there are only handful of human being s who have achieve that. 

[Breakingthewall]

A course in miracles is surprising, fascinating. very strange and evocative. about selflessness ... lately I have seen several times that reality is a unity, that my apparent person is a mirage, and I have become very selfless. So much so that I'm not interested in anything, just observing the world. I suppose that some guide will appear that inspires me to do, although I perfectly understand those Hindus who sit on the street and do not move all day

[Nahm]

Being more “selfless” in regard to your mindset / attitude, time, energy, money, etc… or relinquishing the belief in selves?