Not sure if I am close to Enlightment or to Wrecking my life?

[VeganAwake]

@Javfly33  Stop resisting these thoughts and emotions. Let them completely come on full force. When you resist them, it gives them more energy and perpetuates the belief that they are negative and need to go away, causing suffering.

❤

 

 

 

[VeganAwake]

Liberation from the conditioned minds belief that one thought is better or worse than another.

 

[The0Self]

Pointer:

De-Liberation

 

Perhaps: gain some momentum and let it flow. Fall out of life flat-out completely empty by paradoxically falling head-on completely full into it.

Maybe even utilize LOA. Aaron Abke has great series’ on it.

Edited June 25, 2021 by The0Self

[Javfly33]

@The0Self I kind of now the way.

Let go of the identity.

Stop behaving like a victim

Stop trusting the mind.

Accept that I can already do and be who I want

Literally I can choose good feeling thoughts and emotions and start "acting" on higher vibrations like optimism and self power.

It's just a question of being in "ego death* in sober life. Since "my life" was literally my beliefs about myself. And awakening revealed that that was a fucking theatre.

So I basically have to "die" so this not anymore "my life" but just "life"

It's so hard. In one hand you don't want to let go. In other hand you start to mature enough to choose peace and only be "life" than to remain in suffering but conserving "my life".

[The0Self]

@Javfly33 Nice, but about that last part: that’s just putting a barrier between current circumstance and future life full-on as you want it to be, when there does not need to be a barrier. The ego can’t fall away in that way because there isn’t one.

[Javfly33]

1 hour ago, The0Self said:

@Javfly33 Nice, but about that last part: that’s just putting a barrier between current circumstance and future life full-on as you want it to be, when there does not need to be a barrier. The ego can’t fall away in that way because there isn’t one.

Yeah but in practical terms... Ain't gonna happen

[Bodhitree]

@Javfly33 I suspect you would be well off with a reduction in stimulation, basically cutting down on caffeine, suger and screen time, and spending some time studying Buddhism in order to find more inner peace and a way of distancing from the mind. Put your effort towards being an observer, don’t get so attached to all the thoughts that fly around in the mind, live a simple life for a while. 

[The0Self]

5 hours ago, Javfly33 said:

Yeah but in practical terms... Ain't gonna happen

'Searching is of two sorts, I tell you, deva-king: to be pursued & not to be pursued.' Thus was it said. And in reference to what was it said? When one knows of a search, 'As I pursue this search, unskillful mental qualities increase, and skillful mental qualities decline,' that sort of search is not to be pursued. When one knows of a search, 'As I pursue this search, unskillful mental qualities decline, and skillful mental qualities increase,' that sort of search is to be pursued. 'Searching is of two sorts, I tell you, deva-king: to be pursued & not to be pursued.'

https://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/dn/dn.21.2x.than.html

[Guest Bazooka Jesus]

On 24.6.2021 at 7:48 PM, lark said:

I spend a lot of time in silence and that has helped me.

The last 4 years after my awakening have been the hardest but most rewarding years in my life.

I have had a lot of emotional issues having to come to surface.

Remember to be kind and gentle to yourself.

And if you need medical help do not hesitate.

This guy says it nicely.

 

 

All the best!

These videos are amazing. ???

[Breakingthewall]

I don't know if it happens to you, I would say yes, in my case the problem has been a long time that I believed that many things in my life should not have happened, should be different. This creates a constant background distortion that is anxiety. imagine that what should be is one track, and what is and is another. if they are not exactly the same, there is distortion. To match them, you have to understand one thing very clearly: absolutely everything that has happened to you and you are is perfection. there is not a comma to change or a millimeter to move. any pretense of it is a huge lack of humility, ego in its purest form. It may sound very obvious but it is not really easy to see. The idea yes, but not how real is it. you are the reality, completely perfect. the idea that something should have been different is madness, delirium. There isn't "should be", doesn't exist such idea. If you can see it, you will see how absurd it is to have "dark spots". I don't know what is the technique to see this, I saw it clearly for the first time with mushrooms, the reality that arises from the nothingness like a miracle should be different?? suddenly, in a moment, all thinking about my story stopped. lost its strength. then he came back but after a while of meditation it becomes evident again. is liberation

Edited June 25, 2021 by Breakingthewall

[The0Self]

2 minutes ago, Breakingthewall said:

I don't know if it happens to you, I would say yes, in my case the problem has been a long time that I believed that many things in my life should not have happened, should be different. This creates a constant background distortion that is anxiety. imagine that what should be is one track, and what is and was another. if they are not exactly the same, there is distortion. To match them, you have to understand one thing very clearly: absolutely everything that has happened to you and you are is perfection. there is not a comma to change or a millimeter to move. any pretense of it is a huge lack of humility, ego in its purest form. It may sound very obvious but it is not really easy to see. The idea yes, but not how real is it. you are the reality, completely perfect. the idea that something should have been different is madness, delirium. There isn't "should be", doesn't exist such idea. If you can see it, you will see how absurd it is to have "dark spots". I don't know what is the technique to see this, I saw it clearly for the first time with mushrooms, the reality that arises from the nothingness like a miracle should be different?? suddenly, in a moment, all thinking about my story stopped. lost its strength. then he came back but after a while of meditation it becomes evident again. is liberation

^^ This.

And the madness and delirium is perfect as well.

Nothing is because of what was done, it's only because of what is -- that is, for nothing.

[VeganAwake]

25 minutes ago, Breakingthewall said:

suddenly, in a moment, all thinking about my story stopped. lost its strength. then he came back but after a while of meditation it becomes evident again. is liberation

?

That definitely sounds like Samadhi.

Meditation seemed to play a role here as well and simultaneously it felt like a pathless path through a gateless gate.

It was an un-happening or the end of the individual that was never real in the first place.

And when the bottom of the bucket falls out, it never holds water again.

❤

[Breakingthewall]

1 hour ago, VeganAwake said:

And when the bottom of the bucket falls out, it never holds water again.

 like that, a kind of breakup that happens without warning ,but it must be the i itself that wants to break itself it seems

 

[VeganAwake]

12 minutes ago, Breakingthewall said:

 like that, a kind of breakup that happens without warning ,but it must be the i itself that wants to break itself it seems

 

"I" tries to put itself in a better position by seeking and then stumbles upon its own unreality.

Awakening can actually be a rather terrifying realization despite popular belief. It can also seem ordinary and extraordinary simultaneously.

 

 

[Breakingthewall]

9 hours ago, The0Self said:

Nothing is because of what was done, it's only because of what is -- that is, for nothing.

Yes , and because it is , is absolutely perfect. Obvious in a way, impossible to see in another. For the mind that continually projects the "should be", it is a completely absurd idea .but it is not an idea, it is real, if it is seen, the perfection and real beauty of each thing is manifested, you just have to eliminate the should be

Edited June 26, 2021 by Breakingthewall

[VeganAwake]

1 hour ago, Breakingthewall said:

Yes , and because it is , is absolutely perfect. Obvious in a way, impossible to see in another. For the mind that continually projects the "should be", it is a completely absurd idea .but it is not an idea, it is real, if it is seen, the perfection and real beauty of each thing is manifested, you just have to eliminate the should be

It needs to be seen directly that beliefs are conditioned concepts of society.

If you were born in Iran you would have a completely different set of beliefs and ideas.

Look and see for yourself.

There isn't a you there is only conditioning. ❤

 

 

[Breakingthewall]

23 minutes ago, VeganAwake said:

It needs to be seen directly that beliefs are conditioned concepts of society.

Not only of society. deep down, innate, there is the duality between life and death. a huge urge to live. as we are social beings, this translates into acceptance-rejection, because the society keep us alive. it is something very real, not just social. the "should be" in the end is what it should be to optimize survival. for this it is difficult to transcend. it's on our hardware.

for the self, or the "should be", to dissolve, it is not enough to understand it. you have to see that what is is perfect by definition. it is the existence that arises from emptiness, absolute. It is not easy to see absolute perfection in illness, violence, loss. in fact it is almost impossible since it goes against our hardware.

that is why traditionally whoever has really wanted to see it has had to renounce the world, that is, the need for survival. I think nowadays we can see glimpses or even get enlightened as our survival is highly guaranteed. That is why today we have the possibility of transcending the ego without being heroic renouncers. but if we were in other circumstances, it wouldn't be so easy

Edited June 26, 2021 by Breakingthewall

[gettoefl]

5 hours ago, Breakingthewall said:

Not only of society. deep down, innate, there is the duality between life and death. a huge urge to live. as we are social beings, this translates into acceptance-rejection, because the society keep us alive. it is something very real, not just social. the "should be" in the end is what it should be to optimize survival. for this it is difficult to transcend. it's on our hardware.

for the self, or the "should be", to dissolve, it is not enough to understand it. you have to see that what is is perfect by definition. it is the existence that arises from emptiness, absolute. It is not easy to see absolute perfection in illness, violence, loss. in fact it is almost impossible since it goes against our hardware.

that is why traditionally whoever has really wanted to see it has had to renounce the world, that is, the need for survival. I think nowadays we can see glimpses or even get enlightened as our survival is highly guaranteed. That is why today we have the possibility of transcending the ego without being heroic renouncers. but if we were in other circumstances, it wouldn't be so easy

ego is 5 s's: survival, sex, suffering, story, sovereignty 

it is inborn, the same for everyone plus minus some karma, and worst of all encouraged by society, mine shall be bigger than yours

therefore we think it has to be good lol

spiritual work is but to reorient oneself from ego to god, let ego do what it must but this is not me

my ego is an object not a subject, it is an object just the same as everyone else's, this explains how we are not separate, as i walk around i see my body mind as no different from yours, it is an object doing its thing out of instinct in a dream, it is not me, i am the subject i am Self, i am Source

so who am i?

that's the wrong question, it it not who i am it is what i am, there is no nor never was any person here, i am all what i See

Edited June 26, 2021 by gettoefl